Find A Christian Man

Author: findchristianman

  • Marriage Built on the Foundation of Jesus Christ

    Marriage Built on the Foundation of Jesus Christ

    1 Corinthians 13:4-7 (NLT)

    “Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.”

    In many marriages, partners don’t find out until things have severely broken down that the foundation wasn’t strong from the very beginning. We need to understand that being positive and loving hard doesn’t make the marriage last. Heartbreak often teaches us this lesson. We pour ourselves into our significant relationships without having a strategy to replenish when we run out. We don’t think of ourselves as the architects of our lives, and that we must build them from the very best materials and tools, but we should. The Apostle Paul said in 1Corinthians 3:10 that through God’s grace, we are master builders. We’ve been given the responsibility and privilege to lay a foundation strong enough that another can build upon it. Jesus Christ has taught us how to do this, and we need to have this lesson firmly under our belts for relationships that lead to marriage.

    In Luke 14:28(NLT), Jesus Christ teaches us an extremely important lesson that helps us build strong and healthy significant relationships. He said, “But don’t begin until you count the cost. For who would begin construction of a building without first calculating the cost to see if there is enough money to finish it?” Sadly, this is a piece of wisdom that many of us do not practice, especially when it comes to relationships. There are so many details that we don’t think about. We neglect our own mental and emotional readiness to care for the heart of another. We don’t pray nearly enough for the spiritual growth and well-being of our partners, and we haven’t spent enough time walking in the Spirit and building faith muscle, so that if the partner leaves, we’ll still be standing strong in the Lord. So, the reality is that in many of our relationships, we write checks that we haven’t built the faith to cash.

    Counting the cost requires us to know what it takes to build something strong, and Jesus Christ tells us that we shouldn’t begin until we’ve given this some serious thought. In the passage of 1Corinthians 13:4-5, God tells us that His unconditional and limitless love is patient and kind. God’s love isn’t jealous, boastful, proud, or rude, and it doesn’t demand its own way. We are commanded by Him to love others just as He does, and we certainly must love the significant person in our lives this way. We must make God’s love the standard in our relationships, because this is the way to keep them strong and pleasing to our Heavenly Father.

    This passage in 1Corinthians 13 is a favorite at weddings, and we hear it read at these ceremonies all the time, but so few take the time to understand the quality of love that He is conveying. So few couples have studied it to the point of actually living it. We must count the cost before we take that walk down the aisle, and this means that we know the standard of God’s love. It means that we’re continually analyzing and calculating to truthfully see how we stack up, and then correcting ourselves when we don’t.

    1John 4:10(NLT) says, “This is real love—not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as a sacrifice to take away our sins.” As God’s children of light, we must renew our minds to what real and genuine love is. We must recognize the transformation we must make in our hearts and minds to love through Jesus Christ. This is so important because in our significant relationships, many of us come to the table with only our own brand of love. We expect that this is enough for our partners to feast upon, but it’s not. Although it may be difficult to hear, our brand of love isn’t enough to build a strong foundation for marriage. Once we’re in a relationship, we bring jealousy, insecurity, anger, obsession, entitlement, and pettiness into the mix. We become easily offended, and this weighs down our unions. Without the heart of Christ, we place too many conditions on how we will love and who we will love, and we can miss out this way.

    The Apostle Paul said in 1Corinthians 3:11(NLT), “For no one can lay any foundation other than the one we already have—Jesus Christ.” This tells us that we must use the building materials and tools that our Heavenly Father provides us through Jesus Christ, and we must build our lives on His love, peace, strength, and power. Love does not demand its own way; it causes us to humble ourselves before the Lord Jesus in every aspect of our existences. In truth, the solid foundation of the love of Jesus Christ is so profound that if every Christian built their marriage on it, divorce would be the furthest thing from their minds. We must see our spouses as our brothers and sisters in Christ first, and we must remember that we are commanded to love them according to the standard our Heavenly Father has set in His Word. ■

    Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

    “Marriage Built on the Foundation of Jesus Christ”, written by Fran for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2026. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

  • God’s Promises Are Absolute

    God’s Promises Are Absolute

    Melinda and Shawn had been friends since they were kids. Their moms were best friends, so they had plenty of play dates and were joined at the hip as they got older. In high school, they were inseparable and shared everything, but as their friendship continued to grow through college, Shawn developed strong feelings for Melinda. He had fallen in love with her, but she didn’t have a clue. For months, he had been praying for a sign from the Father to tell her how he felt, and when that sign wasn’t as clear as he wanted, Shawn was puzzled and disappointed. He wondered why the Lord wasn’t giving him the green light he expected.

    Often, we ask God for signs when, in our hearts and minds, our intentions are to do exactly as we want. We’re asking God to cosign our wills instead of His Will, and we must be clear that He doesn’t play those games. The psalmist wrote in Psalm 115:3(ESV), “Our God is in the heavens; he does all that he pleases.” This is a powerful truth. God doesn’t need our permission to carry forth His Will and Word. The wisdom of Proverbs 19:21(NLT) tells us, “You can make many plans, but the LORD’s purpose will prevail.” God’s Will is fully transparent, and it is revealed within His Word. He’s not trying to hide anything from us, because He doesn’t have to. God always speaks the truth.

    Numbers 23:19(NLT) says, “God is not a man, so he does not lie. He is not human, so he does not change his mind. Has he ever spoken and failed to act? Has he ever promised and not carried it through?” We are monumentally blessed to love and honor a God that is righteous, good, and true all the time. He is forever and always faithful to His Word, and we can depend on this with all that we are. So, our goal as it relates to anything we desire or attempt to pursue in life is to first identify what pleases God, and then to understand His purpose. If we are faithful to trust Him despite any signs we do or do not perceive, the Holy Spirit will lead and guide us in both of these.

    What pleases God?

    Shawn was raised by believing parents, and he was taught the Word of God, but like all of us, he needed to learn more about our Heavenly Father in order to develop his faith. He had not learned that pleasing God is above all else in our Christian walk, and every good thing that we desire and attempt to do hinges on that central privilege and responsibility. Hebrews 11:6(NKJV) tells us, “But without faith [it is] impossible to please [Him], for he who comes to God must believe that He is, and [that] He is a rewarder of those who diligently seek Him.” This is a foundational truth! Our Heavenly Father rewards us when we diligently seek Him, and our hearts and minds must be anchored in this truth for our entire spiritual journey in Christ.

    Diligence is required in our relationship with God. We can’t do the least, like Cain did in the Old Testament, and think this is acceptable. We must be diligent to grow in faith in God’s love, power, and sovereignty, because this is what pleases Him. We must also understand that waiting on God is required as well. After a few months of praying about what Melinda’s response would be to declaring his feelings, and also asking God if she was the one for him, Shawn didn’t feel that he had heard a ‘yes’ or a ‘no’ from the Father about this. Rather than continuing to wait, he decided to act. On the same night that he declared his feelings for Melinda, she planned to share the news that she had met someone she really liked. Shawn was so disappointed because he believed he had acted in faith.

    Psalm 27:14(ESV) tells us, “Wait for the Lord; be strong, and let your heart take courage; wait for the Lord!” Many of us put a timeline on this. We believe it is up to us to determine how long we should wait. The reality is that the timing isn’t as important to our Heavenly Father as our obedience to do what this verse says. God expects us to have faith that when we pray and ask Him to intercede, He will do exactly that. And He will move according to His perfect timing. He will cause all the details to come together in a way that satisfies His Will, and therefore, brings us joy and abundance as well.

    God does indeed give us meaningful signs that can help to guide our choices and decisions, but our faith can’t be dependent on receiving signs. Our faith must be in the reality that God is who He says He is, and He will do what He said He will do.

    Relationships involve other people, and God will never overstep the free-will choice of another human being to give us what we want. He’s simply not going to do that. It could have been that Shawn needed to wait because he was still immature in ways that are very important to significant relationships. Rather than confessing his love to Melinda, he could have given that whole situation over to the Lord and waited to be guided by God’s Holy Spirit. It’s possible that this guidance might have taken a year or two. That might have been the time it would take for Shawn to be ready to hear Melinda’s response and react to it in a way that turned her heart to him.

    Our purpose

    Our purpose for being on this earth is to grow in our relationship with God through Jesus Christ. In our lists of priorities, this must always be number one. Our Heavenly Father knows who and what is best for us. He tells us in Psalm 118:8(ESV), “It is better to take refuge in the Lord than to trust in man.” And Jeremiah 17:7(ESV) says, “Blessed is the man who trusts in the Lord, whose trust is the Lord.” Our God is not slow to act. He’s patient and brilliant! His promises are absolute, and they will not fail us. Many believers are praying to receive the manifestation of their desires, and waiting can be discouraging at times, but we cannot allow that to hinder our faith in God, because He is our faith! Heavenly Father hears our prayers, and He is helping us to grow spiritually so that nothing is more important to us than pleasing Him and fulfilling His purpose for our lives. Everything falls in line when our hearts and minds are centered on this. ■

    Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

    English Standard Version (ESV)
    The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. ESV® Text Edition: 2016. Copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers.

    Scripture taken from the New King James Version. Copyright © 1982 by Thomas Nelson, Inc. Used by permission. All rights reserved.

    “God’s Promises Are Absolute”, written by Lizzie for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2026. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

  • Jesus Calms the Storm

    Jesus Calms the Storm

    Leslie’s youngest daughter, Vanessa, had been a very quiet and reserved child until she turned 14 years old. She began to date boys and skip school, all the while her mother and two older siblings were completely oblivious. It wasn’t until her grades began to slip that Leslie caught a glimpse that something was wrong. Their father passed away shortly after Vanessa was born, so Leslie was a single parent with three children and two jobs. She couldn’t believe the things the teachers were saying about her child, and after two years of struggling to help Vanessa to get back on track, Leslie was tired and still very worried about her youngest.

    She was so thankful that Vanessa had made it to her senior year, but her grades were not what they could have been. Vanessa had fallen deeply in love with Reggie, a boy that had barely made it through school himself. He foolishly used drug money to lavish Vanessa in the extravagant prom dress she wanted, and this had placed her whole family in jeopardy. When Leslie found out about it, she was beside herself. All too familiar with news stories about what happens when you mess with the wrong players, she hustled to come up with the money to make things right. The last few years had taken a toll. Her fears and anxiety were at an all-time high, and she was worried about what Vanessa might do next.

    Some of the issues that many of us are facing today are nothing like those of the past. Situations that we never once imagined can land on our heads in a blink of an eye, and life as we know it is forever changed. Troubles and challenges like the ones Leslie have faced with her daughter can bring life and death consequences. The emotional weight of continuing uncertainty is also a huge burden. It can feel as though our backs are against the wall, and there’s no way out, but this simply isn’t true. Matthew 11:28-30(NLT) tells us, “28 Then Jesus said, “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. 29 Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls. 30 For my yoke is easy to bear, and the burden I give you is light.”” We need Jesus, plain and simple. He can and will take our burdens and replace them with his love and light. We must have faith in this.

    When we come to that big whammy of an issue in life, we must understand that it’s spiritual warfare. Ephesians 6:12(NLT) tells us, “For we are not fighting against flesh-and-blood enemies, but against evil rulers and authorities of the unseen world, against mighty powers in this dark world, and against evil spirits in the heavenly places.” It is very easy to attribute our troubles to a flesh and blood individual, a person that comes against us and perhaps those we love. We think that if we can handle the person through our own solutions, we’ll be all set. But often, when we try to do this, we find that the person continues to plague us in other ways.

    Romans 8:7(NIV) says, “The mind governed by the flesh is hostile to God; it does not submit to God’s law, nor can it do so.” A mind that is governed by the flesh will always look to the flesh for solutions. A mind that is governed by the flesh is consumed with fear and tied to responses dictated by fear. This creates an unstable foundation, and very little can be built on it. Jesus Christ is continually knocking at the door, asking to come into our hearts, minds, and lives in a greater way so that a sturdy foundation can be built on him. He’s the One with power and authority, and our trust in him allows us to use it.

    Our children learn faith or fear from us. They practice what they see us doing, both good and bad. If we don’t believe deep down that God is our salvation, that we have nothing to fear because He will provide and protect us, they will pick up on this. We must be ever aware that this can be a great hindrance in their lives.

    A carnal mind is hostile to God, because it is rebellious against fully believing and trusting Him. A spiritual mind is the mind of Christ. It is the mindset of faith and this is the mind that God requires us to have. There will be storms in life, on this we can depend. We will endure hardship, but the solution is Jesus Christ! He taught the disciples this, and they had to learn the spiritual reality of faith in Christ during scary situations. In Matthew 8:23-27(NLT), we learn about one of those times.

    This passage says, “23 Then Jesus got into the boat and started across the lake with his disciples. 24 Suddenly, a fierce storm struck the lake, with waves breaking into the boat. But Jesus was sleeping. 25 The disciples went and woke him up, shouting, “Lord, save us! We’re going to drown!” 26 Jesus responded, “Why are you afraid? You have so little faith!” Then he got up and rebuked the wind and waves, and suddenly there was a great calm. 27 The disciples were amazed. “Who is this man?” they asked. “Even the winds and waves obey him!””

    The disciples were called by Jesus Christ to follow him. We have that same calling. He walked with them daily and taught them the Word of God. In Jesus, the disciples had the overwhelming privilege to witness the living Word of God up close and personally. They saw the miracles, power, love, authority, and truth that he demonstrated in his life. They witnessed the perfection of his walk on earth, but when they found themselves facing the storm, they forgot about that. This was no ordinary storm. It was sent by satan to destroy them, but Jesus Christ was asleep. He could sleep through the storm because of his faith in God, but many of us will not practice the peace and calm that he did.

    The disciples ran to Jesus Christ shouting “Save us!” How is it that they could run to him to be saved, and still be afraid? This was unstable thinking, because we cannot have faith and fear at the same time. Jesus straightened out the waves, and he straightened them out as well. He calmed the storm and demonstrated his power to help the disciples. He will do the same for us.

    We don’t have to hide the reality of our trials, troubles, and tribulations from our children and those we love. However, our faith in Jesus Christ must be louder than the problems we face. So often we show our loved one a mentality of disappointment, sadness, and defeat. We can’t fake it, and they know us better than anyone. They see our lack of faith because deep down, that’s what we’re feeling. We must renew our minds to God’s Word and have faith in Him. We must recognize that our very lives are a testimony of the love, power, and victory of Jesus Christ. God knew about the storm way before it occurred. He’s already solved it. All He requires from you is that you really and truly believe it. ■

    Holy Bible, New International Version®, NIV® Copyright ©1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc.® Used by permission. All rights reserved worldwide. 

    Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

    “Jesus Calms the Storm”, written by Sokie for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2026. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

  • When Your Spouse Dismisses You

    When Your Spouse Dismisses You

    Allen and Tiffany had a very rocky engagement, and most of their friends felt they weren’t ready for marriage. They thought they were. After dating six months, they got engaged, and never really seemed to enjoy being a couple. They frequently argued and there was very little they’d agree on. Both accused each other of always trying to get in the last word, and Tiffany was notorious with giving Allen the silent treatment. Each felt unheard by the other, and neither of them seemed willing to humble themselves towards compromise or reconciliation. The thing they had in common was stubbornness and the need to be right. Neither of them acknowledged their baggage or wanted to change their ways. Things got progressively worse between them, and they married each other anyway.

    Amos 3:3 (NLT) says, “Can two people walk together without agreeing on the direction?” This is a pivotal question, and it leads to a very important piece of God’s wisdom. If followed, it can foster a successful and lasting marriage. The answer to Amos 3:3 is obviously ‘no’, two people can’t walk together in the same direction if they don’t agree to do so. Agreement is harmony, and harmony among individuals is achieved when two or more people are concerned with things like balance, sacrifice, compromise, and greater good. All of these lead us forward and upward in the blessings of God. Strife, discontent, pettiness, jealousy, envy, anger, belligerence, and resentment all cause regression and decline. That’s not us. The direction for all God’s children is always moving forward and upward.

    Our brilliant Heavenly Father created laws that prevent us from ever going backwards. We can’t relive our pasts, we can’t carry them forward, and the destiny that God has set for all human beings requires us to continually and consistently look ahead. So, when we continue dabbling in anything that keeps us going backwards, we should know automatically that we’re moving in the wrong direction, and the only way forward is to change.

    Regression isn’t an option for any child of God who wishes to live abundantly through Christ. This means that when we have baggage that weighs us down, and weighs down those we claim to love, we must get rid of it. God commands us in Ephesians 4:22-24(NLT), “22 throw off your old sinful nature and your former way of life, which is corrupted by lust and deception. 23 Instead, let the Spirit renew your thoughts and attitudes. 24 Put on your new nature, created to be like God–truly righteous and holy.” Throwing off that old worn out baggage and putting on heaps of love and light through Christ is something we’re supposed to do before we get married, but many of us don’t.

    Every believer has a sinful nature before we are born-again and receive the infilling of the Holy Spirit. When the Holy Spirit comes to live inside us, we are transformed! That sinful nature no longer has a grip on us, so we should release it and let it go. 2Corinthians 5:17 says giving our lives to our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, makes us a new person—a new creation in him. Our old life goes away, and a new life begins as we live through Jesus Christ every day. When individuals don’t pay attention to the example of love, light, and humility that our Blessed Redeemer left for us, they begin to lead their relationships through their own wills and standards. Things crumble and can do so quickly when that’s their approach. We don’t have a foundation without Christ. Nothing stands when we leave his example and standard of love out of the equation.

    Jesus Christ teaches us in Matthew 7:24-27(NLT), “24 Anyone who listens to my teaching and follows it is wise, like a person who builds a house on solid rock. 25 Though the rain comes in torrents and the floodwaters rise and the winds beat against that house, it won’t collapse because it is built on bedrock. 26 But anyone who hears my teaching and doesn’t obey it is foolish, like a person who builds a house on sand. 27 When the rains and floods come and the winds beat against that house, it will collapse with a mighty crash.” This collapse was happening in Allen’s and Tiffany’s marriage. As things got worse, she belittled Allen, sometimes in front of his friends. He’d hold grudges against her for doing this, and he’d do so for a very long time. He began to dismiss her feelings, opinions, and efforts toward the marriage. As a couple, they lost respect for one another, and it was very painful to watch.

    1Corinthians 3:11(NLT) tells us, “For no one can lay any foundation other than the one we already have—Jesus Christ.” He’s the Rock of Our Salvation, and nothing works the way it should, including marriage, without following and living by his teaching, example, and love. As men and women who live for Jesus, we can never allow the foundation of Christ to slip from underneath our marriages. It is our privilege and responsibility to build them on the foundation that he has laid. When we love God’s way, we will love our spouses as brothers and sisters in Christ first. This means that we honor them supremely and would never do anything to cause them harm because we recognize they belong to God and not to us.

    Through his example, Jesus Christ teaches us that humility and obedience are required in our relationship with God, and we must understand that humility and sacrifice are required in a marital union. For these to be strengthened in us, we must be willing as men and women to decrease so that the Holy Spirit works through us to help us love our spouses in a way that pleases God. We can’t say anything we want to say or do anything we want to do in a marriage. We can’t dismiss the feelings of our spouses or make them feel unheard. Instead, we must change the way we think. We must pray for the heart of Christ to swell within us. When we do this, our marriages will be sustained through his love, as we remain thankful, humble, and dedicated to give God all the glory through our marital unions.■

    Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

    “When Your Spouse Dismisses You”, written by Lizzie for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2026. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

  • How Do I Make A Man Love Me?

    How Do I Make A Man Love Me?

    The minds of many women are occupied with the question, “How do I make a man love me?” We want to know how to make him light up when we walk into a room and we want him to absolutely adore us. We desire the ultimate commitment from a man, and we want him to make us feel secure in his love and devotion. It’s the real love that we’re after. From the top of his head to the tips of his toes, we want him to be oozing over with a Christ-like manhood. When we’re sad, he will do anything within his power to make that sadness go away. When we’re working on a project, he’s all-hands-on-deck. We never have to beg him to spend time with us because he makes us feel that being in our company is the highlight of his day. He’s loyal to the end, and this is the man we want to love us. We want him prepared and prepackaged with the capacity to return the quality of love that we give him.

    Facts

    I went to college with women that had been pumped and primed by their mothers to marry a college man of a certain breeding. They were told what to do and what not to do, and many of them followed the rules to a tee. Their studies were second to landing the right man and securing a wedding date and marriage soon after college. Growing up, all of us probably learned some portion of a formula-based thinking about how to get a man. It might have been primarily focused on the man’s physical desires. We were told to do this or do that to secure his affection. The reality that no one schooled us about is this; the way you begin a relationship molds the quality of it. So, if it isn’t beginning with the love of God in our hearts, and we don’t renew our minds to His Word and fill our hearts with His love, that relationship has nowhere to go but down.

    It’s a fact that objectifying men based on preconceived notions of who they are and what they like is just as horrible as objectifying women. The reality is that there’s no way to hold a relationship together when physical attraction is used as a net to capture and keep someone tied to it. That’s never a successful strategy.

    Marriage was sanctioned by God in the very beginning. He established it for His purpose, and we can never forget this if we desire to marry well. Through the marital union, God provides for our needs, and when Jesus Christ is the head of that union, the couple and their family unit is blessed and unified. If we take marriage out of the holy and appointed purpose that God has set, we’re setting ourselves up for failure.

    As women who desire to partner with a man in marriage, we are deserving of someone that is capable of giving all the love and devotion of which we, ourselves, are capable of giving. This is both the mindset and the heart required for starting a solid relationship, because it sets the stage for mutual respect and unity. We can’t afford to neglect the words of Jesus Christ in Luke 12:48(NLT), “When someone has been given much, much will be required in return; and when someone has been entrusted with much, even more will be required.” So, out of respect and reverence for God’s institution of marriage and its purpose, we should never expect of someone more than we have proven willing to do and give ourselves.

    God has equipped us through Christ to continually exceed the love of which we think ourselves capable. We should also understand that our personal commitment to pour into our spouses, to give, share, and serve them, is also a required mind-and-heart-set for God’s daughters. We should forever be willing to give and share at or above the level we expect to receive.

    The right motivation

    All human beings have needs, and all human beings that are capable of intelligent thought can perceive those needs mentally, emotionally, physically, and most importantly, spiritually. So, our needs are multi-faceted. As women, we should not expect men to be any different. Primarily, we all want to be loved. We want people in our lives that love and support us. Please be clear that God created us in such a way that His love, and the desire for it, is at the root of all our needs. This is basic for all human beings, but many deny it. Although they seek elsewhere to get their needs met, only God can fill our cups and make us fulfilled in life.

    1John 4:8(NLT) clarifies any misunderstandings we might have about this. It says, “But anyone who does not love does not know God, for God is love.” God is our Creator, and He created us by, in, with, and through His love. He made us what He is, because Genesis 1:26-27 tells us that we were made in His image. So, we are made to both seek and give love, but not just any ol’ love. We’re created to seek and give God’s love.

    Most people make the mistake of trying to separate God’s love from romantic love, but that is impossible. Romantic love is only possible through God’s love. So, don’t try to separate romantic or any other kind of love from the Creator who is love and created all that we survey. As God’s people, our love for God is the right motivation no matter what we might attempt to do. When our motivation isn’t to love God and share His brand of love, but to fulfill our own personal agendas, we run into problems and the blessings we seek escape us. This is where many single women are today. They want to find someone to love them, but do not have an intimate relationship with God, the Source of all love. Because of this, they can’t see the blessing even if it is standing right in front of them.

    The power of love

    God is love. He demonstrated His great love for us all when He sent His Son, Jesus Christ, to give his life as a sacrifice for our sins. God’s love comes to live in us when we accept Jesus Christ as our personal Lord and Savior. The only way to have God’s love in our hearts is for Him to put it there through the new birth experience. The Holy Spirit comes to dwell inside us and gives us the desire to please God and love others. This is power, and without it, we are disappointed and defeated in our efforts.

    We are incapable of making someone love us, and in truth, this is never something a child of God would have to do. 1John 4:16(NLT) tells us, “We know how much God loves us, and we have put our trust in his love. God is love, and all who live in love live in God, and God lives in them.” When God’s love is in us, we will want to please Him by loving others through Jesus Christ. Despite our differences and backgrounds, we are all created by God and programmed to love and to be drawn to love. It’s in us, and it is a very spiritual reality. Those who live in love are drawn to others who live in love as well, because God is in them.

    Trying to make a man love us is like trying to fit a square peg into a round whole. It’s an unnatural thing to do. Obedience to God’s Word takes care of all our needs in life. Sometimes we forget that love is power, because God is love and all power is in His hands. You and I don’t have any power of our own. It all belongs to God. He’s demonstrated the power of His love through His Word. Because of His wonder working power, we’ve seen up-close and personal that love is the power that motivates, attracts, transforms, and changes things for the better. So, making the right man love you requires no effort from you at all. God will take care of every detail of your marital union when your heart is full of His love and your desire is to do His Will and put Him first in your life.■

    Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

    “How Do I Make A Man Love Me?”, written by Sokie for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2026. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

  • Changing Our Hearts

    Changing Our Hearts

    When thinking about the human heart, most of us first consider the vital organ of the human body that is necessary to keep the body alive. In the physical sense, the heart is a large muscle. As it beats, it pumps blood around the entire body, carrying oxygen and nutrients throughout all the parts, while also getting rid of unwanted wastes. Its design allows us a glimpse of God’s masterful and brilliant handiwork in creating this intricate organ that supports our lives. It also paints a detailed and precise portrait of how important the spiritual heart is to the survival of the human soul. Just as the body has a heart that keeps it alive and thriving, the soul has a heart as well. The condition of the heart of the soul is the determining factor as to whether we will live an eternity with our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, or whether our souls will be tormented by eternal darkness.

    In the Gospel of John, Chapter 3, Jesus Christ had a conversation with Nicodemus about God’s Kingdom and the requirements to become a citizen of it. He said in John 3:3-6(NLT), “3 I tell you the truth, unless you are born again, you cannot see the Kingdom of God.” 4 “What do you mean?” exclaimed Nicodemus. “How can an old man go back into his mother’s womb and be born again?” 5 Jesus replied, “I assure you, no one can enter the Kingdom of God without being born of water and the Spirit. 6 Humans can reproduce only human life, but the Holy Spirit gives birth to spiritual life.”

    1 Thessalonians 5:23 (NLT) tells us, “Now may the God of peace make you holy in every way, and may your whole spirit and soul and body be kept blameless until our Lord Jesus Christ comes again,” and that one verse alone settles something we don’t always stop to think about—we are spirit, soul, and body, not scattered parts but a complete, intentional design. There is nothing random about how our Heavenly Father created us; Genesis 1:26–27 reminds us we were made in His image, and that goes far deeper than appearance—it speaks to our origin, our nature, even our structure. Everything God creates reproduces after its own kind, so just like elephants don’t produce giraffes and kangaroos don’t give birth to whales, God—Father, Son, and Holy Spirit—formed us in a way that reflects Him. Spirit, soul, and body, each with its own function, yet all working together in purpose, revealing a design that was never accidental and never without meaning.

    God made us spiritual beings housed in a body, which means this life we’re living is an earthly experience—but it’s not our origin and it’s not our final home. Heaven is, because that’s where our Creator is. And because of that, God set a requirement that goes deeper than just being born naturally. We have to be born twice. Jesus Christ makes this clear in John 3:5 when He says that to enter the Kingdom of God, we must be born of water and of the Spirit. That first birth—being born of water—is our natural birth, when we were carried and formed in our mother’s womb. But the second birth is spiritual. It’s when we receive God’s seed through spiritual conception, when His life is placed within us. That’s what makes us His children—not just that we were created by Him, but that we have been born from Him.

    Through our faith in Jesus Christ, our dead human-spirit that was severed from God through Adam’s sin, is recreated by the Holy Spirit. The Holy Spirit is God’s seed, and he comes to dwell inside us when we accept Jesus Christ as Lord of our lives. 1Peter 1:22-25(NLT) tells us, “23 For you have been born again, but not to a life that will quickly end. Your new life will last forever because it comes from the eternal, living word of God. 24 As the Scriptures say, “People are like grass; their beauty is like a flower in the field. The grass withers and the flower fades. 25 But the word of the Lord remains forever.” And that word is the Good News that was preached to you.”

    The Holy Spirit made us alive in Christ, but our hearts and minds are completely under our jurisdiction. God has given us free-will, and He will not force us to bring our hearts and minds up to the standard of our new life in Christ. This He leaves totally up to us. The Holy Spirit will give us a new heart, but our invitation to him must be clear and contain a willingness to be submissive under his guidance.

    God warns us in Proverbs 4:23(NLT) to, “Guard your heart above all else, for it determines the course of your life.” Get a visual on this, see yourself standing outside the gates of your soul’s heart, manning the post, ensuring that nothing evil or sinful gets past the gate. This is the vigilance you must have about your soul’s heart. You must guard it with the Word of God, so that you will have a heart that pleases Him.

    When we give our lives to Christ, guarding our hearts is just about the most important task we can undertake. Standing guard requires us to examine our emotions, thoughts, and words, and determine who is the source of them. Are they giving life and inspiring others to love God, or are they seasoned with the negative and selfish buzz of the world? Our commitment to God is demonstrated by what is in our hearts and what we let out of them. This is why God said to His prophet, Samuel, in 1Samuel 16:7(NLT), “Don’t judge by his appearance or height, for I have rejected him. The LORD doesn’t see things the way you see them. People judge by outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart.” No one other than God can look into an individual’s heart, and our hearts tell Him what is most important to us and who we really love.

    Jesus Christ commanded us in Mark 12:30(NLT), “And you must love the LORD your God with all your heart, all your soul, all your mind, and all your strength.” This is a heart that is sold out to God, and if we have even a hint of doubt that our hearts are not fully committed to Him, now is the time to change them. We need to be praying that God will give us a new heart so that when our Savior returns, we will be ready.

    Ephesians 5:26-27(NASB20) says, “26 so that He might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, 27 that He might present to Himself the church in all her glory, having no spot or wrinkle or any such thing; but that she would be holy and blameless.” Jesus Christ is going to rapture his church. We are his bride and he is coming back for us. It is up to each of us to be without spot or wrinkle. He took care of the sin issue when he gave his life on the cross as a sacrifice for our sins. We are born-again and covered by the blood, and he tells us to remain blameless. It’s not about being polite or nice. It’s not about looking sharp on the outside. The inside is what God cares about. We’re not perfect. Yes, we all make mistakes, but despite our errors, our hearts must be loyal to God through the Lord Jesus Christ. If they aren’t, now is the time to get into God’s Word, surrender to His Spirit, and allow the Spirit to help us change our hearts and get right before God. ■

    Scripture quotations taken from the (NASB®) New American Standard Bible®, Copyright © 1960, 1971, 1977, 1995, 2020 by The Lockman Foundation. Used by permission. All rights reserved. lockman.org

    Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

    “Changing Our Hearts”, written by Fran for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2026. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

  • Trusting God’s Wisdom for Relationships

    Trusting God’s Wisdom for Relationships

    King Solomon is the wisest man that ever lived. His father, King David, trusted God to deliver, forgive, and guide him through life. In Proverbs 4:4-5 (NLT), Solomon reflects on the lessons his father handed down to him: “4 My father taught me, “Take my words to heart. Follow my commands, and you will live. 5 Get wisdom; develop good judgment. Don’t forget my words or turn away from them.””

    This verse shows that Solomon didn’t merely listen to the words of his father, but he took them to heart, internalizing them and deeply considering his dad’s instructions. Imagine being king over God’s people at such a young age! Solomon had this huge responsibility, and greatly valued his father’s wisdom. David told Solomon that if he listened and followed his advice, things would go well for him. Desiring him to rule wisely, David wanted him to be guided by God’s wisdom. The bottom line is that this passage emphasizes the importance of listening to wise advice, following it closely, and always keeping it in the forefront of our minds. It’s about using God’s wisdom to guide our decisions and actions, so that our lives will be full and prosperous.

    Single Christian women worldwide should engrave this scripture in Proverbs 4:4-5 in their hearts, particularly those that are praying for a good, Godly man. Often, we live hoping for external events to bring us happiness, but true strength and beauty come from internalizing the wisdom our Heavenly Father shares throughout His Word.

    Proverbs 4:7 (NLT) says, “Getting wisdom is the wisest thing you can do! And whatever else you do, develop good judgment.” We want the good results, but some of us feel that we can skip God’s wisdom and have them anyway. Life doesn’t work that way. Wisdom and good judgment lead to good results. This is especially so when it comes to choosing the person that is right for our lives.

    God knows who’s best

    God knows the man that is best for our lives. This man is in the earth, living his life right this very moment. He needs your brand of specialness as much as you need his, and he is destined to walk with you through life in a meaningful way. Although you may not know who he is or where he is, you can be assured that God does. In order for this union to take place, obedience and patience with God’s perfect timing is required.

    God does not allow us to control His process, and we must submit to this truth with our full hearts and minds. Surrendering to His timing and plan means trusting and being patient, knowing He knows best and His timing is always right. When we let go and trust His process, we find peace and fulfillment in ways we might not expect, knowing He’s working everything out for our good.

    Mistakes of our past

    Mistakes of our past don’t define our future with God. He doesn’t hold them against us, but He does expect us to use the wisdom of His Word so that we do not make the same mistakes twice. Internalizing God’s wisdom means understanding it deeply and letting it shape our relationships and decisions. Jesus Christ teaches us how to prioritize this in Matthew 6:33. (NLT) “Seek the Kingdom of God above all else, and live righteously, and he will give you everything you need.” 

    Seeking God and His Kingdom above all else aligns us with His plan and purpose; it’s the only way. When we earnestly seek Him, we tap into His wisdom and guidance, which helps us avoid pitfalls and walk confidently in His Will. Asking God for wisdom about our past mistakes and trusting Him to lead us to the answers initiates synchronicity with His Will and plan.

    We can’t get sucked into society’s ideology of what’s good and acceptable for relationships and marriage. Instead, we should learn to release our grip and rely on God’s wisdom. He’s the One with the plan, and He deserves our complete trust and obedience. He’s the Leader, and we must allow Him to guide us in our relationships, trusting His wisdom and perfect timing. By doing so, we align ourselves with His purpose. We’ll discover true fulfillment in relationships where Jesus Christ is at the center, and his unity and love hold everything beautifully together. ■

    Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

    “Trusting God’s Wisdom for Relationships”, written by Kim for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2026. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

  • The Way We Love Matters to God

    The Way We Love Matters to God

    Our Relationships Are One of the Places Our Faith Becomes Visible

    Jesus Christ never intended our relationship with Him to affect only what happens between us and God. As we grow in Christ, something about the way we relate to people should begin to change too. We should become more patient, more willing to forgive, less determined to have our own way, and more aware of how our words and actions affect others. We won’t get it right all the time, but the love of Christ working in us should eventually become noticeable in the way we treat people.

    Jesus made this connection very clear when He told His disciples:

    “So now I am giving you a new commandment: Love each other. Just as I have loved you, you should love each other. Your love for one another will prove to the world that you are my disciples.”
    John 13:34–35 (NLT)

    That’s a pretty high standard because Jesus didn’t simply tell us to love people when they are easy to love. He said, “Just as I have loved you.” His love is patient and merciful. It serves. It forgives. It tells the truth. It doesn’t disappear the moment somebody disappoints Him. At the same time, the love of Jesus Christ is never weak, dishonest, or without wisdom. He could be incredibly compassionate and still tell someone the truth they needed to hear.

    That matters because we sometimes confuse Christian love with keeping everybody happy. We can think loving someone means never saying no, never disagreeing, overlooking behavior that needs to be addressed, or remaining in relationships that continually cause harm. But that isn’t what Jesus showed us. There were people He embraced, people He corrected, people He served, people He confronted, and even times when He walked away. Love was present in all of it.

    Learning to love people like Jesus Christ is something God develops in us over time. Our relationships give us plenty of opportunities to practice what we say we believe about grace, patience, forgiveness, humility, honesty, and service. They also require wisdom because not every relationship should have the same access to our lives. As we learn from Jesus Christ and follow the leading of the Holy Spirit, we become better equipped to love people genuinely without losing the truth, wisdom, and boundaries that healthy relationships need.■

    Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

    “The Way We Love Matters to God”, written by Alex for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2026. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

  • When Weariness Tries to Set In—What You Must Remember in Christ

    When Weariness Tries to Set In—What You Must Remember in Christ

    You’re Not Meant to Live Drained When You’ve Been Made Alive in Christ

    Galatians 6:9 (NLT) tells us, “Don’t get weary in doing good, for at the proper time you will reap a harvest if you do not give up.” That verse sounds like strength—it calls us to keep fighting the good fight of faith. It feels like a hand reaching out right when we need it most. But let’s be real—during those times when our emotions are sinking, loneliness is hitting hard, and we’re running on empty, “don’t get weary” can feel like a real struggle.

    And if we’re honest, for many—especially in seasons of singleness—that kind of weariness doesn’t always announce itself; it slips in quietly. You can still be smiling, still showing up, still saying the right things, all while something on the inside is getting tired of waiting. It shows up in the silence, in the questions you don’t always say out loud, in that inward wondering—God, is this really going to happen the way I’ve been holding onto it in my heart? And now you’re not just waiting—you’re wrestling to stay anchored while you wait.

    But here’s what we have to come back to—weariness may visit, but it was never meant to stay.

    Jesus Christ tells us in John 10:10 that He came so that we would have life—and have it more abundantly. That kind of life isn’t surface-level or dependent on circumstances. It’s spiritual first. Because the truth is, you cannot sustain an abundant life outwardly if your inner life is running empty. Everything flows from that place. And if we don’t get anchored within, we’ll keep trying to solve spiritual depletion with natural solutions—and that will never hold.

    This is where we have to understand who we really are.

    John 3:6 (NLT) reminds us that “Humans can reproduce only human life, but the Holy Spirit gives birth to spiritual life.” That means your identity isn’t rooted in what you feel or what you’re currently experiencing. You are a spirit, made alive in Christ. And that changes everything. Because your spirit—where the Holy Spirit dwells—is not weak, not depleted, and not limited. The tension we feel often comes from allowing our soul to lead while our spirit is trying to guide.

    And if we don’t slow down and realign, weariness will keep showing up stronger than it should.

    We also have to remember the cost of what was given to us.

    Jesus Christ didn’t just come to improve our lives—He completely restored access to the Father. When He gave His life on the cross, the veil in the temple was torn from top to bottom. That wasn’t symbolic—it was decisive. It meant there was no longer separation. No barrier. No distance between us and God. What once required layers of preparation and limitation was opened fully through Him. That kind of access was never meant to sit unused. It was meant to sustain you.

    And this is where many of us miss it. We carry the weight of life as if we’re disconnected, as if we have to figure everything out on our own, as if what we’re believing for is uncertain. But when you understand what Christ actually restored, you realize—you’re not waiting from a place of lack. You’re living from a place of access.

    That changes how you endure. Because yes, life can be heavy. Yes, the process can stretch you. But Isaiah 40:31 (NLT) reminds us, “Those who trust in the LORD will find new strength. They will soar high on wings like eagles…” That strength isn’t automatic—it’s accessed through trust. Through staying connected. Through choosing to believe God even when your emotions haven’t caught up yet.

    And this matters deeply when it comes to what you’re believing Him for—especially in relationships.

    You cannot afford to let weariness lower your expectation. You cannot allow time, delay, or past disappointment to reshape what you believe God is able to do in your life. Because the moment weariness starts speaking louder than truth, you’ll find yourself settling—not because it’s what you want, but because you’re tired.

    And you were never meant to choose from that place. So yes—acknowledge the weariness when it comes. But don’t partner with it. Don’t let it rewrite your thinking or redefine your expectation. Let it push you back into alignment. Back into truth. Back into the awareness of who you are, whose you are, and what has already been secured through Jesus Christ. Because this isn’t about chasing a fairytale. It’s about walking in what was already made available. And when you stay anchored there, weariness may come—but it won’t be able to stay. ■

    Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

    “When Weariness Tries to Set In—What You Must Remember in Christ”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2026. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

  • Before You Say “I Do”: Are You Ready for Marriage, Not Just a Wedding?

    Before You Say “I Do”: Are You Ready for Marriage, Not Just a Wedding?

    Most women know that planning a wedding and preparing for marriage are two different things. We know it. We say it. But once there is a ring on your finger and a wedding date on the calendar, it can become surprisingly easy to spend more time thinking about one day than the life that begins after it.

    There will be decisions about dresses, flowers, food, invitations, bridesmaids, music, photographs, and where everybody is going to sit. Somebody will probably get upset about something that you didn’t even know was important. By the time you reach the wedding day, you may feel as though you’ve earned a degree in event management.

    And then everybody goes home.

    You wake up married.

    That’s the part you need to prepare for.

    A Christian marriage is more than two people who love each other deciding to spend their lives together. You are entering a covenant before God, and if Jesus Christ is Head, both husband and wife are agreeing to live under His authority. That means preparing for marriage has to go deeper than preparing for the ceremony.

    Marriage Will Require Something From You

    Philippians 2:3–4 (NLT) tells us, “Don’t be selfish; don’t try to impress others. Be humble, thinking of others as better than yourselves. Don’t look out only for your own interests, but take an interest in others, too.”

    Marriage will give you plenty of opportunities to live that Scripture.

    There will be times when what your husband needs is inconvenient. There will be times when you are tired and he is tired, and neither one of you feels particularly interested in putting the other person first. There will be seasons when one person carries more because the other simply cannot. Marriage will require patience, forgiveness, sacrifice, faithfulness, self-control, and a willingness to serve.

    That doesn’t mean losing yourself or believing that your needs no longer matter once you become a wife. It means understanding that marriage cannot thrive when either person enters it primarily concerned with what the other person is going to do for them.

    It’s worth asking yourself before marriage: Am I prepared to love someone when loving him requires something from me?

    He needs to be asking himself the same question.

    Marriage Will Not Fix What You Refuse to Deal With

    Sometimes we imagine marriage as the beginning of a completely different life. And in many ways, it is. But you don’t become a different person because somebody puts a ring on your finger.

    You bring yourself into the marriage.

    Your habits come with you. Your attitudes come with you. Your relationship with money comes with you. Your ability to communicate comes with you. Your temper comes with you. Your insecurities, unresolved hurts, selfish tendencies, fears, expectations, and spiritual maturity all come too.

    This is one reason preparation matters.

    Psalm 139:23–24 (NLT) says, “Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. Point out anything in me that offends you, and lead me along the path of everlasting life.”

    That is a courageous prayer for anyone preparing for marriage because it turns our attention away from evaluating somebody else long enough to allow God to examine us.

    Lord, what in me needs to change?

    Where am I selfish?

    Where am I still carrying hurt that affects the way I love?

    Where do I need greater discipline?

    Where am I expecting another person to give me something that I should be receiving from You?

    You don’t have to become perfect before you get married. If that were the requirement, nobody would ever make it down the aisle. But there is a difference between having areas where you are still growing and refusing to deal with things God has already shown you.

    Learn to Be Faithful Before Someone Calls You a Wife

    Marriage vows don’t create character. They reveal the need for it.

    If you want to be faithful in marriage, practice faithfulness now. If you want to communicate honestly in marriage, practice honesty now. If you want your future home to be financially responsible, learn how to handle money now. If you want prayer to be part of your marriage, don’t wait for a husband before developing a prayer life.

    And if you want Jesus Christ to be Head of your marriage, He needs to have authority in your life before you marry.

    Jesus says in Luke 6:46 (NLT), “So why do you keep calling me ‘Lord, Lord!’ when you don’t do what I say?”

    That’s a question worth sitting with.

    It is easy to say we want a Christ-centered—better yet, Christ-headed—marriage. It is another thing to surrender our choices, habits, attitudes, relationships, bodies, money, and plans to His authority.

    You cannot prepare for the headship of Christ in marriage while resisting His headship in your single life.

    Make Sure You Understand Covenant

    Marriage is not a promise to remain committed as long as the other person continues making you happy.

    Feelings matter, but feelings change. There will be seasons of tremendous joy in marriage, and there may also be seasons of disappointment, grief, stress, sickness, financial pressure, exhaustion, or simply the routines of everyday life.

    This is part of why choosing wisely matters so much.

    Jesus teaches in Matthew 19:6 (NKJV), “So then, they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate.”

    Those are serious words.

    Marriage is not something Christians should enter casually with the thought that if it becomes difficult, we can always walk away. At the same time, taking covenant seriously does not mean a person should remain in danger or quietly endure abuse. Covenant should never be used as a weapon to trap someone in violence, coercion, or mistreatment.

    Understanding the seriousness of marriage should make us more careful before entering it, not more willing to tolerate what God never required us to tolerate.

    Ask Yourself What You Think Marriage Is Going to Give You

    This may be one of the harder questions.

    What are you expecting marriage to fix?

    Loneliness?

    Financial insecurity?

    Sexual temptation?

    Your sense of worth?

    The feeling that everybody else has moved forward while you’re still waiting?

    Marriage may change some circumstances in your life, but a husband was never designed to take the place that belongs to Jesus Christ.

    A man cannot carry the responsibility of making you whole. And you cannot carry that responsibility for him.

    Colossians 2:10 (NKJV) tells us, “and you are complete in Him, who is the head of all principality and power.”

    Your completeness is in Christ.

    That doesn’t make the desire for marriage wrong. Wanting companionship isn’t wrong. Wanting to share your life with a godly man isn’t wrong. Wanting children and a family isn’t wrong. Marriage is a beautiful gift from God.

    But a gift cannot become your god.

    When Jesus Christ is Head, marriage takes its proper place. You can deeply love your husband without asking him to become your source. You can enjoy marriage without expecting it to answer every longing in your heart. And you can enter marriage as a woman who already knows where her life comes from.

    Prepare for the Marriage You Keep Praying For

    If you’ve been praying for a godly husband, it is reasonable to ask what kind of wife you are preparing to become.

    Not for some imaginary man. Not because your value depends upon whether somebody chooses you. And not because women have some special obligation to get themselves perfect while men get to show up however they please.

    Prepare because you belong to Jesus Christ.

    Allow the Holy Spirit to develop your character. Learn how to forgive. Learn how to communicate. Become responsible with what God has already placed in your hands. Deal honestly with the places where you need healing. Learn how to apologize. Strengthen your prayer life. Know God’s Word for yourself. Become increasingly obedient to Christ.

    Then, when you’re considering marriage, look for a man who is doing the same.

    You are not looking for two finished people. You are looking for two people who understand who their Head is and are willing to keep growing under His authority.

    The wedding will be one day.

    Marriage, God willing, will be many years.

    So enjoy the dress. Enjoy the flowers. Take a ridiculous number of pictures. Celebrate with the people you love and thank God for bringing you to that day.

    But prepare for what happens when everybody goes home.

    Prepare to love. Prepare to forgive. Prepare to serve and to receive. Prepare to communicate. Prepare to grow. Prepare to keep following Jesus when marriage is wonderful and when marriage requires more of you than you expected.

    Before you say “I do,” don’t only ask whether you’re ready to get married.

    Ask whether you’re preparing to live as a wife under the headship of Jesus Christ.■

    Scripture taken from the New King James Version. Copyright © 1982 by Thomas Nelson, Inc. Used by permission. All rights reserved.

    Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

    “Before You Say “I Do”: Talk About the Life You’re Actually Going to Build”, written by Alex for https://findchristianman.com, Copyright©2026. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord!