Find A Christian Man

Category: Growing in Christ

Growing in Christ is about becoming more like Jesus in the way we live, think, love, and respond to God. Explore biblical teachings designed to help you deepen your faith, grow in spiritual maturity, understand God’s Word, follow the leading of the Holy Spirit, and live out your relationship with Christ in everyday life.

  • Your Happiness in God Alone

    Your Happiness in God Alone

    God is my rescue

    1Corinthians 7:38-40(NLT)
    “So the person who marries his fiancée does well, and the person who doesn’t marry does even better.  39 A wife is bound to her husband as long as he lives. If her husband dies, she is free to marry anyone she wishes, but only if he loves the Lord. 40 But in my opinion it would be better for her to stay single, and I think I am giving you counsel from God’s Spirit when I say this.”

    After reading this passage, you might come away thinking that God prefers that believers remain single, but this isn’t the case. While it’s true that there are many advantages to remaining single, there are just as many to the ministry of marriage. God has given us free-will, and we get to choose which one is right for the kind of life we want to live. The Apostle Paul’s counsel in 1Corinthians 7:38-40 goes to the heart of our purpose as children of God and brothers and sisters of Christ. He’s instructing us about both service to God as well as marriage, and there’s no question that in this passage, he is prioritizing service to our Heavenly Father.

    King Solomon affirms the importance of prioritizing our relationship and responsibilities to God in Ecclesiastes 12:13(NLT). He said, “That’s the whole story. Here now is my final conclusion: Fear God and obey his commands, for this is everyone’s duty.” This is the Will of God for us, but we have allowed the pull of all the distractions of modern times to occupy our minds and hearts. We live in a very different time and our culture is far away from the kind of dedication and honor towards God that believers had two thousand years ago. Worship, praise, and service to our Heavenly Father was not only their lifestyle, they viewed it as their livelihood, occupation, and recreation. Many of us haven’t quite seen it this way.

    In several of the epistles, Paul refers to himself as a slave to God and to Jesus Christ. He was fully persuaded in the Lord and dedicated his entire life to serving God. Today, our schedules are packed, and our agendas are to work and take care of all the many things on our plates. The truth that God teaches us through Paul is that it’s better to simplify our lives as much as possible, so that our walk with Heavenly Father is unencumbered with the cares of the world.

    Marriage will bring new complexities and complications. Because our hearts are so heavily invested, these can potentially take our focus off God and off the business of His Kingdom. When this happens, our relationship with Heavenly Father, our faith, and our spiritual growth can slip to second place. This will cause further unhappiness because God is the glue that holds a marriage together, and our relationship with Him must be prioritized correctly. He tells us to put Jesus Christ in the highest place of leadership in the marriage. When this isn’t done, and we take our focus off Jesus, things begin to unravel.

    All of us have probably known women that are unhappy being single. They want to meet someone and fall in love. When this finally happens for them, they’re happy for a time, and loves the way the new man makes them feel, but in many situations, this doesn’t last. After that initial phase of newness, some are left feeling as sad as they were before they met this man. This happens when the love of Christ is not the center of our existences. We don’t have the spiritual bandwidth to withstand some of the rigors of relationship. Our Heavenly Father doesn’t want this happening to any of us. If we remained anchored in Him, a lot of this disappointment and heartache can be avoided.

    Beginning relationships with the best possible footing requires our full faith and confidence in the truth that God is the Source of all happiness. Paul said in Philippians 4:12-13(NLT), “12 I know how to live on almost nothing or with everything. I have learned the secret of living in every situation, whether it is with a full stomach or empty, with plenty or little. 13 For I can do everything through Christ, who gives me strength.” Paul conveys his ability to handle whatever comes his way. Whether he has a lot or a little, he succeeds because of the strength that Christ gives him. We are no different. We are empowered through our Lord and Savior, and to remain in his strength, we must submit wholeheartedly to God.

    We must recognize that every good thing that we accomplish in life has Christ at the center of it, and this includes marriage. We make a mistake when we think that another human being can be the source of our happiness when only the Lord can. Marriage is indeed a blessing from God. It requires that faith isn’t just something we go to at a point where it seems the relationship is fizzling. Faith must be anchored in our minds and hearts before we get into relationships, so that we are not just dating to be dating. When our faith is in God through the Lord Jesus Christ, we date with God’s purpose in mind. We should never want to waste emotional resources becoming invested when the person was never meant our destiny partner.

    1John 5:4(NLT) tells us, “For every child of God defeats this evil world, and we achieve this victory through our faith.” Victory is when we are prepared through Jesus Christ to stand on the Word of God no matter the plots, tricks, and traps the enemy sends against us and our unions. When our faith is firmly anchored in God, we can stand strong.

    Now is the time to be honest in your assessment of your faith. If your happiness is not in God alone, you must change your agenda, because it should be about pleasing God with your whole life. Understand that He will take care of every detail of our happiness when our faith is firmly planted in Him. So, if there’s any possibility that you are not where you need to be in the faith, pray and get into God’s Word more, then watch as He rewards your increased commitment to put Him first. ■

    Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

    English Standard Version (ESV)
    The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. ESV® Text Edition: 2016. Copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers.

    “Your Happiness in God Alone”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2025. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

  • A Clean Heart Creates a New You

    A Clean Heart Creates a New You

    Ezekiel 36:26-27(NLT)
    “26 And I will give you a new heart, and I will put a new spirit in you. I will take out your stony, stubborn heart and give you a tender, responsive heart. 27 And I will put my Spirit in you so that you will follow my decrees and be careful to obey my regulations.”

    Our Lord is in no short supply of blessings and riches, and it is His good pleasure to lavish them on His children. We can see this so clear in Ezekiel 36:26-27, as He beautifully illustrates the level of His power and grace. In Old Testament times, God chose the Israelites as His very special people. He made a covenant with them. He would be their God and they agreed to follow His statues, rules, and laws. Following His Word allowed them to be covered under His protection and provision, but they would not keep their end of the covenant and began to practice idolatry. This betrayal against God landed them in serious hot water. They turned their hearts away from Him and had no desire to obey, but God had a plan to do the exceedingly abundantly. He always does, and this is a truth that we can rest in with a heart and mind full of unwavering faith.

    Even after countless miracles and blessings, the children of Israel strayed away from God. They didn’t represent Him among the other nations, and those nations were cursing our Heavenly Father’s name and speaking lies about Him. He was not going to stand for that. During this period in the Old Testament, His people had stony hearts towards Him. They refused to listen to our Heavenly Father and chose to go their own way, but He had a plan. In this passage in Ezekiel 36:26-27, He speaks to His people through His prophet, Ezekiel, and tells them that a day is coming when He will no longer write His Word upon tablets of stone, but upon the hearts of those who love and honor Him.

    Some believers living today have done what the children of Israel did, they have developed a hard heart towards God and His Word. They are listening to the world and disconnecting from the truth, and there’s a price to pay for this. The Israelites of the Old Testament were not sons and daughters of God the way that we are. They were servants of God, so there’s a huge difference between those living in Old Testament times and believers living today. We have received an enormous gift from God. We have been empowered through His Holy Spirit, and we have a greater responsibility to live by the rules of God’s Kingdom and follow the example of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.

    Because of what God accomplished through Jesus Christ, we have received God’s seed, the gift of the Holy Spirit, and he lives inside us! 1Corinthians 6:19-20(NLT) says, “19 Don’t you realize that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit, who lives in you and was given to you by God? You do not belong to yourself, 20 for God bought you with a high price. So you must honor God with your body.”

    Through the Holy Spirit, God has given us a new heart that is tender and responsive to Him, and it is our privilege and responsibility to nurture our hearts with His Word every chance we get. Philippians 2:13(NLT) says, “For God is working in you, giving you the desire and the power to do what pleases him.” This is what God’s Holy Spirit does. He works within our body temples and gives us both the desire and power to do the things that please God. Jesus Christ also tells us in John 16:13 that the Spirit will lead and guide us to all truth! With this exciting good news, we must also understand that yes, the Spirit is working in us, and yes, he will guide us into the truth, but he will not go against our free-will and make us comply with his leadership and direction.

    In Proverbs 4:23(ESV), God tells us to “Keep your heart with all vigilance, for from it flows the springs of life.” We are the keepers of our own hearts, and we must make the choice to surrender to the Spirit. Sometimes we don’t do this because we have not kept our hearts through God’s Word. As His beloved children, we always have to put ourselves in check. Have you noticed the condition of your heart lately? Has anyone mentioned something about your attitude or behavior that needs changing? Are you aware of how quickly you get upset when something doesn’t go your way? How do you handle not being the one in control?

    We can be very petty and picky, and we can have an attitude that looks nothing like the attitude of Christ. We must be blatantly honest and examine whether things like these are holding us back. It would be a mistake to think that we can walk by faith while still resisting change. We must be flexible, pliable, and humble to God’s Will, and we must nurture our minds and hearts with His Word.

    We can’t listen to what others think is right, we must know what is right according to what God says. If we have any question about this, the Spirit will straighten us right on out. Cynicism and pessimism can take root in us if we’re not careful, and when they are in our hearts, they draw the situations and people that latch on and keep us from growing and going higher. 2Corinthians 5:17(NLT) tells us, “This means that anyone who belongs to Christ has become a new person. The old life is gone; a new life has begun!” Because of his sacrifice and resurrection, Jesus Christ has given us the Holy Spirit, and the Spirit has made us a new person. We can’t allow people to take us back to those old stuck in the mud ways. We must keep our eyes on Christ and follow where he leads us through the Spirit.

    Jesus Christ has made a ‘new you’ possible! This is the ‘new you’ that must be presented to your future spouse! You’ve been empowered to love yourself and others through his love, and this makes all the difference in our relationships. God made good on the Word He gave to His prophet, Ezekiel. He’s given us a new heart, and we are responsible for keeping our hearts responsive to Him and pliable to the plan He has for our lives. His love is deep and everlasting, and we must be confident that His promise of a new heart and a new life in Christ is all the hope we need to usher in new blessings in our lives.■

    Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

    English Standard Version (ESV)
    The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. ESV® Text Edition: 2016. Copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers.

    “A Clean Heart Creates a New You”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2025. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

  • Let Us Continue to Love

    Let Us Continue to Love

    1John 4:7-10(NLT)
    “7 Dear friends, let us continue to love one another, for love comes from God. Anyone who loves is a child of God and knows God. 8 But anyone who does not love does not know God, for God is love. 9 God showed how much he loved us by sending his one and only Son into the world so that we might have eternal life through him. 10 This is real love—not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as a sacrifice to take away our sins.”

    Real love comes from God, and we know we have it in our hearts when we love others not based on how we feel about them, but how God feels about them. Our Heavenly Father wants us to go into our significant relationships with the truth of His overwhelming love for everyone already firmly anchored in our hearts. God demonstrated His great love for us when He sent His only begotten Son, Jesus Christ, to offer himself as a sacrifice for our sins. If God made decisions based on how we feel about Him, Jesus Christ would never have come, because most people do not love Heavenly Father the way He deserves. Even when we are at our worse and do not love Him, He still loves us unconditionally. He expects His children to remember this with every breath we take, so that His perfect love works in us and helps us to truly love others.

    Dishonor

    1Corinthians 13:5(NLT) says that love “does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.” Many of us have known about or witnessed in relationships where the couple doesn’t honor one another. They do not regard each other in the highest esteem. Instead, at times they speak to one another with belittling and profane terms and have a bad attitude towards the other person when things don’t go their way. You may have had a relationship like this yourself. It’s not fun. It a signal that the two people in the relationship do not value each other or themselves in a Godly way.

    You matter, all day, every day. You matter not because you say so, but because God says so, and showed you this by giving Jesus Christ as a sacrifice for your sins. You matter to Him, and that is all that counts. In order for you to walk in faith, you must believe what God says about you. If you do, you will not invest in a relationship with someone that dishonors you by constantly putting you down rather than lifting you up. You shouldn’t want to be treated this way, and you most definitely should never treat anyone else that way. Love elevates, and that’s how you know it’s real.

    Selfish Agenda

    1Corinthians 13:5 tells us that love is not self-seeking. Real love does not have an agenda of selfishness. God’s purpose for marriage is that two people serve one another in a way that promotes loyalty, preserves unity, and stretches capacity. Marriage is going to stretch a person beyond the level of their perceived capability. If you miss this, you are in for a rollercoaster ride you won’t like. There are instances in a relationship where both individuals are giving equal levels of effort, time, and resources, but there are also times when there are varying levels of giving. There may be areas in the relationship where one partner is devoting 70 percent and the other 30 percent, and we need to be prepared for that.

    The thing to know is that when God has put two individuals together, Jesus Christ is the head of their union, and it is their responsibility to keep him there. Even during times when it appears that one partner is not all in, prayer is the answer, not bitterness or resentment. Playing the blame game or being sour and in our feelings because we didn’t get from our partner what we expected isn’t the way love behaves. God is our sufficiency, so we shouldn’t make a habit of expecting another individual to complete us, because no human being can do that. Real love does not allow expectations or personal agendas to hinder the other person’s peace and contentment. You must stretch your faith in God that He will take care of you as you serve your spouse and always do what is in their best interest according to the Will of God.

    Reciprocity

    Reciprocity is a practice of mutual exchange for mutual benefit. This is the emotional and spiritual goal that most have as they consider marriage. It’s responding to one another in a rewarding way. We didn’t set the precedent for this, God did. Jesus Christ said in Luke 6:38(NIV), “Give, and you will receive. Your gift will return to you in full–pressed down, shaken together to make room for more, running over, and poured into your lap. The amount you give will determine the amount you get back.” When we pour into the person that God has sent for us, they will pour into us. This isn’t something that we need to push or shove along. God takes care of this and its where our faith must be.

    The issue arises when we’re not with the person God has ordained for our lives. When this is the case, we might find ourselves giving and giving without receiving anything of significance in return. Real love always, always, always seeks God first, and real love allows HIM to direct our paths. This means that we don’t invest in men that God didn’t send because they are not yet equipped with the level of gratitude or the capacity to respond to us. Even if he’s a maybe, many of us will still make an ample investment and give too much of ourselves without a greenlight from Heavenly Father. We’ll see the rewards of our giving at some point down the road, but that man will not engage in reciprocity of our investment. He is the receiver of it but lacks what is needed to reciprocate.

    Whatever the case may be, we can never allow what our partners do, and how they respond to us, to stop us from continuing to love with the heart of Jesus Christ. For those relationships that ended, we must handle things and walk away with God’s love in our hearts for that person. We must carry no trace of that relationship’s fallout into the next one. We must also understand that even in relationships with the man that God has sent, there will be disappointments and unfulfilled expectations. There will be dry spots, mountains to climb, and bumps along the way. In all these, we have got to trust the power of God’s love, because it is real love, and real love never fails or gives up. Be committed to let God’s love lead you every step of the way in your desire for marital partnership. Anchor yourself in His love, so that wherever He leads on the path of His blessings, you have the humility and wisdom to follow. ■

    Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

    THE HOLY BIBLE, NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION®, NIV® Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc.® Used by Permission of Biblica, Inc.® All rights reserved worldwide.

    “Let Us Continue to Love”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2025. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

  • A Heart Consumed with the Love of Christ

    A Heart Consumed with the Love of Christ

    “One of the Pharisees asked Jesus to have dinner with him, so Jesus went to his home and sat down to eat. 37 When a certain immoral woman from that city heard he was eating there, she brought a beautiful alabaster jar filled with expensive perfume. 38 Then she knelt behind him at his feet, weeping. Her tears fell on his feet, and she wiped them off with her hair. Then she kept kissing his feet and putting perfume on them.”
    Luke 7:36-38(NLT)

    God has given us many gifts and blessings, but the one thing He hasn’t given any of us is the ability to see into another person’s heart. Only He can do that. The only way that you and I can know an individual’s heart is if he or she reveals it to us. Often, they do so at the most unassuming times. We can see who a person is at their very cores by their actions. Intentionally cutting someone off while driving, taking a parking space that someone was waiting on, hurting the feelings of others by refusing to filter out negativity; these are just a few actions that tell us that the love of God isn’t deeply rooted in a person’s heart. Our true character is the core of who we are, and just like the sinful woman that kissed Jesus’ feet, it will always be exposed.

    The woman in this record in Luke 7 was referred to as sinful because of how she chose to make a living. She was believed to be a prostitute and according to Simon, the Pharisee host that day, she had many sins. The Pharisees were vehemently against the teachings of Jesus, so this was not a friendly dinner that he attended, and Simon was a rather rude host. The culture at the time this record was written was such that hospitality was extremely important. There were gestures and practices of etiquette that were always observed, but Simon didn’t honor Jesus according to the usual customs. The woman, however, did. She honored Christ in a way that changed her life.

    When she found out that Jesus was at the Pharisee’s house, she didn’t care what others thought of her. She needed to see him, and she put her love for Jesus on full display. She washed his feet with her tears, dried them with her hair, kissed his feet continually and anointed them with ointment. Jesus Christ knew of her past sin, and in normal circumstances, had he been another prophet, she would not have been allowed to touch him. Our beloved Lord and Savior, the Son of the Living God, showed her and us that he is touchable. He forgave her sins that day because he saw her heart.

    Simon thought Jesus Christ had done the wrong thing by this woman, but Jesus Christ set him straight. Luke 7:44-47(NLT) says, “44 Then he turned toward the woman and said to Simon, “Do you see this woman? I came into your house. You did not give me any water for my feet, but she wet my feet with her tears and wiped them with her hair. 45 You did not give me a kiss, but this woman, from the time I entered, has not stopped kissing my feet. 46 You did not put oil on my head, but she has poured perfume on my feet. 47 Therefore, I tell you, her many sins have been forgiven—as her great love has shown. But whoever has been forgiven little loves little.”

    Like the woman in this record, all of us have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God. Every person that Jesus Christ met during his sojourn on earth was a sinner, and he came to deliver us all from the bondage of darkness. As single women, we must recognize that God is looking at our hearts. He’s looking to see if we have the kind of heart that will honor Christ over a man and the man’s desire for sexual sin outside of marriage. Will we put Christ first is always the question, and our actions to do so will always reveal the answer.

    God commands us in Colossians 2:7(NLT), “Let your roots grow down into him, and let your lives be built on him. Then your faith will grow strong in the truth you were taught, and you will overflow with thankfulness.” Our roots are our cores, and to be anchored in Christ is to let our roots grow down into him, so that every aspect of our being is saturated in his love. It is to be committed to God’s Word and to be unmovable on it, no matter who comes into our lives.

    Our Heavenly Father desires us to live according to His standard, and He looks at our hearts, because they tell the true story about how genuine our love for Him really is. 1Corinthians 4:20 tells us that the Kingdom of God is not just a lot of talk, it’s power! It’s everything to us, and we must live in a way that conveys we believe and honor this. Jesus Christ said in John 14:21(NLT), “Those who accept my commandments and obey them are the ones who love me. And because they love me, my Father will love them.” Let’s remember this always. If we live by it, we can be confident that when God looks our hearts, He’ll see them consumed with the love of Christ, and this means they are open to receive all that He has in store. ■

    Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

    “A Heart Consumed with the Love of Christ”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2024. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.