Find A Christian Man

Tag: Spiritual Growth

  • Weeding Out What Isn’t Working for You

    Weeding Out What Isn’t Working for You

    I’m letting you know up front that this is going to be one of those teachings that encourages you to keep on fighting for the life you want, but I’m also aiming to do something else. I’m going to tell you what God says we must do in order to obtain and maintain the blessing we’re praying so fervently to possess. It is a message for those that are single, and they are praying to cross paths with the person God is going to present to them. The emphasis should be placed on the reality that God is the One to make the presentation. He takes care of this part. The believer’s responsibility in the situation is to believe. “To believe what?”, you might ask. We must believe God’s Word. This is critical to securing the marital union you desire. And one of the major reasons why it is so critical may be something you’ve never thought about.

    If you’ve been single for a while, you’ve learned a few things about what works and what doesn’t work. How do you know what doesn’t work? The only way that you and I can judge if something isn’t working is to stack it up against the truth of God’s Word. Our beautiful single and saved sisters will go to classes, seminars, and try several ways to secure what they desire, but the question to ask is whether those things are actually in the Will of God for your life. The world offers many gimmicks for getting what we want most, but problems are not solved by gimmicks; they are band aids. Only the Word of God can solve problems.

    There are times when you feel as though you’re getting close. You may sense that something has shifted in your flow, and you start to feel optimistic about things. Then, after a while, when nothing pans out, it just takes the wind right out of you. In a situation like this, the foundation of hope and optimism slips from beneath your feet, and your heart sinks yet again. But that’s just it, sisters in Christ, these feelings show us the kind of foundation we were building our hope on. In other words, the foundation you thought you had, and the foundation God expects to see in you are sometimes two different things.

    Whether it is firm or shaky, our whole lives are resting on a foundation. The foundation that God expects to see in us is one built on Jesus Christ. He especially wants to see this in us before we get married. Jesus Christ said in Matthew 7:24-25(NIV), “24 Therefore everyone who hears these words of mine and puts them into practice is like a wise man who built his house on the rock. 25 The rain came down, the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against that house; yet it did not fall, because it had its foundation on the rock. 26 But everyone who hears these words of mine and does not put them into practice is like a foolish man who built his house on sand. 27 The rain came down, the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against that house, and it fell with a great crash.”

    When something is taking a really, really long time to come to pass, this might be a hint that weeding out what isn’t working for you is the best course of action. The critical piece of information that you and I must know is that God cannot reward us if we refuse to make our foundation strong. If our foundation is shaky, it can’t hold the weight of the blessing we seek. This is something most of us never consider. The key to unlocking the door to blessings is following the Will of God for your life. There is absolutely no compromise on this truth. Heavenly Father desires us to grow in the example of Jesus Christ, and God never gives up on His plans. Our desire for marriage is not as important as God’s Will being done.

    Moses told God’s people in Deuteronomy 4:9(NIV), “Only be careful, and watch yourselves closely so that you do not forget the things your eyes have seen or let them fade from your heart as long as you live. Teach them to your children and to their children after them.” Longevity, permanence, and unfailing are Heavenly Father’s trademarks. Eternity is His brand and it is always on His mind. He is interested in preserving His Word so that people will have it in their hearts forever. This is why there must not be a compromise in our minds and hearts when it comes to the perfection of His Word. The world cannot tell us what is right. The standard of God’s Word must be our aim, and when our commitment is unmovable when it comes to what God says, the blessings we desire most are sure to come.

    Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

    Holy Bible, New International Version®, NIV® Copyright ©1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc.® Used by permission. All rights reserved worldwide.

    “Weeding Out What Isn’t Working for You” written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2021. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

  • Looking for Love in All the Wrong Places

    Looking for Love in All the Wrong Places

    Growing up, the youngins in my family were chastised for listening to grown folk’s business, but if they hadn’t been gossiping, there would have been nothing to hear. The many relationships gone wrong was the talk of our small town. I remember hearing such-and-such and so-and-so were getting divorced because the wife found out that her husband was cheating with another woman in the neighborhood. This kind of thing wasn’t uncommon, and news of it spread like wild fire. But the gossip wasn’t the worse part. Often, seasoned matriarchs, even those in the faith, would say things like, “She’d better stay with that man. Even if he’s cheating, she’ll regret leaving if she ends up alone. She’d better stay put; she’ll get over it!”

    This kind of thinking was cultivated from a lack of knowledge of God’s Word. Romans 10:17(NLT) tells us, “So faith comes from hearing, that is, hearing the Good News about Christ.” It isn’t enough for the Word to simply fall upon our ears. We must digest it in a way that it gets mixed with understanding and believing. We must understand the greatness of God’s Word as we also believe it with our whole hearts. Witnessing some of the advice that was doled out as wisdom in yester-years, as well as today, we can see so clearly how crucial it is for us to hear and understand God’s truth.

    Even today, for many women it is common to accept an abusive man out of a fear of loneliness or fear of not having material or financial provision. Much of this thinking has been breed into us from a culture where faith is not accurately and frequently taught. It’s not just the insidiousness of cultural teaching about abusive behavior, there are many other attitudes we’ve accepted about men and relationships that undermine our confidence and self-worth.

    When we’re praying to cross paths with our future partners or praying for the relationship we’re currently in, these kinds of attitudes and entrenched thinking are often brought to the forefront, where we can examine them. Something will transpire to call our attention to certain things, and the worst course of action we can take is to ignore whats in front of our faces. The baggage of fear is a heavy load, and if we’re carrying it, we need to address it from the root, so that we don’t bring fear and wrong believing into a new relationship. Jesus Christ is Lord in every way, and we must honor him in all area of our lives, especially when it comes to our relationships. Many of us put up the “Stay away” sign, but this is a huge mistake. We desperately need his help. We must remember that the goal is to allow Jesus Christ the room to move in our significant relationship, because he’s the glue that holds them together.

    I remember hearing from a mature Christian woman that we teach men how to treat us by how we treat ourselves. Treating ourselves good means that we love ourselves with the love of Christ! Honor, respect, and obedience are just a few Godly characteristics that a woman should live by in order to get her mind and heart in the right place.

    Galatians 5:1 (MSG) says, “Christ has set us free to live a free life. So take your stand! Never again let anyone put a harness of slavery on you.” When we hear the word ‘slavery’, we think of bondage and imprisonment. This is a very real and true perspective of what it means to live in darkness and fear. Participating in a relationship without knowing or upholding the standards of Christ is the equivalent of living behind bars. There’s no freedom in a lie, only God’s truth can bring light, love and liberty to every situation.

    You see, when we don’t press into God for direction and discernment, we might look for love in all the wrong places. Then, we attract men who help us remain comfortable in our insecurities and fear. That’s not what Heavenly Father wants for His beautiful daughters. Ephesians 5:25 says God wants us to be loved by a man that will love us as Jesus Christ loves the church and gave his life for her. Let’s not remain behind the blinders but remove them to see that just as we are capable and willing to love a man with a heart of Christ, we must not accept less than this from him.■

    Scripture taken from The Message. Copyright © 1993, 1994, 1995, 1996, 2000, 2001, 2002. Used by permission of NavPress Publishing Group.

    Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

    “Looking for Love in All the Wrong Places”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2020. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord!

  • List, Lust, and Lost-Potential

    This week, I met up with a fellow sister-in-Christ to talk about some ideas on coordinating a weekend getaway for singles. While having lunch, she mentioned she’d just recently met someone. She met him at a car dealership when she went for her routine maintenance. He’s a mechanic there, and they struck up a conversation while she was waiting on her car to be serviced. He politely asked if he could take her out for lunch one day, and they exchanged phone numbers.

    I was happy to hear this news. She’s been single for several years and has always complained about the difficulty of meeting someone new. Having given him her number, I was struck and surprised by the fact that she immediately attempted to size up why this man didn’t have a chance with her. In her estimation, he should have been much further along in life. The respectable, highly in demand skills of a mechanic she felt was beneath her standards. I sat and listened to her requirements of what and who he should be in order for her to consider going out on a date. It became a laundry list of “not good enough”.

    Everyone is entitled to their list of requirements, most single sisters I know have one, but for those of us in the Lord, we must be extremely careful. If our list doesn’t line up with God’s love, ‘Houston, we have a problem!’

    If you hear caboodles of sisters spin their criteria this way, which I have, the portrait that many of them have painted of pervasive singleness takes on another dimension. You start to see the gaps where the love of God has not been allowed in. They chose to believe that God is withholding the blessing of a spouse, when nothing could be further from the truth. Heavenly Father designed the universe in such a way that it responds incredibly favorably to those with an abundance of His love in their hearts.

    Jesus was a carpenter, and I think he would agree that being a mechanic is an honorable profession. He would not think himself above or below anyone’s occupation, but he would weigh the willingness of a person to grow in God’s love. 1John 4:17(NLT) tells us, “And as we live in God, our love grows more perfect. So we will not be afraid on the day of judgment, but we can face him with confidence because we live like Jesus here in this world.” As joint-heirs with Christ, we live in God, all of us that are saved. One no more worthy or less in God’s eyes than the other. All of us are being perfected in Christ, and as our love for him grows, our level of genuine kindness and humility should as well.

    Through the Apostle Paul, God schooled us further on the extraordinary example of faith that Abraham left for us. He tells us in James 2:22(NLT), “You see, his faith and his actions worked together. His actions made his faith complete.” This is an amazingly profound piece of wisdom and truth. Abraham’s faith was a powerful combination of right believing and right actions, and this is what kicked his faith in high gear. His example teaches us that obedience to God’s Word is a very powerful thing.

    After having lunch with my sister-in-Christ, I realized how easily so many of us forfeit opportunities to share the light and love of Christ with others. Instead of seeing a person with the eyes of Christ as someone worthy to hear the truth, some of us quickly size them up for list, lust, and lost potential. It takes faith to magnetize our desires and draw the blessings we seek, and we need to make sure that our attitudes about men, marriage, and our own level of love is pleasing to God. That’s the only way that our faith is made perfect and achieves the powerful results we all want to see.■

    Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

    Scripture taken from The Message. Copyright © 1993, 1994, 1995, 1996, 2000, 2001, 2002. Used by permission of NavPress Publishing Group.

    “List, Lust, and Lost Potential”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2020. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord!

  • It’s Just So Unfair!

    James 3:17 (NLT) “17 But the wisdom from above is first of all pure. It is also peace loving, gentle at all times, and willing to yield to others. It is full of mercy and the fruit of good deeds. It shows no favoritism and is always sincere.”

    “I just can’t go to another wedding! My last single girlfriend just snagged a good man, and I don’t understand it. She hasn’t been on this Christian journey as long as I have, and I don’t think she’s as dedicated as I am. To make matters worse, she’s on her second go around, and I’ve never had a ring on my finger! It just doesn’t seem fair. Where am I going wrong?” This summarizes the sentiments of many sister-friends that are very frustrated. They’ve been single longer than they’d like and don’t understand why things are not working out for them.

    God provides for us a sure Word, a Word that we can count on no matter what, because God’s Word will never fail or falter. We can stand upon it and it will never let us down. In James 3:17, He tells us that His wisdom is pure. It is unadulterated. So when we see things that look to us to be unfair, we can rest assured that they may look that way, but God’s way is perfect.

    It is when we allow ourselves to indulge this sense that we are being wronged or unfairly treated in life that we make huge errors. The first mistake is forgetting that God’s wisdom is unfailing, and the second is neglecting that it does not show favoritism. This train of thought gains traction from our emotional responses, and once it does, it then has the power to affect our outcomes.

    God has told us to renew our minds for a reason, and one of those reasons is because the way we think plays a huge role in the amount of peace, abundance, and fulfillment we experience in life. Without putting ourselves in check, we begin to move in reverse and attract the exact opposite of the blessings we desire.

    The blessing of marriage is a spiritually forward, progressive, and higher level reality. Therefore, it stands to reason that it will require a spiritually forward, progressive, and higher level mentality and emotionality to build capacity for it. We can’t get there by indulging negativity and letting bottom feeding thoughts and emotions drag us beneath the realm of Godliness.  You can only get a higher functioning mind-and-heart set from trusting, knowing, and feeding upon God’s Word.  

    James 1:5 (NLT) tells us, “If you need wisdom, ask our generous God, and he will give it to you. He will not rebuke you for asking.” The same energy that we waste by thinking and reacting to doubt, we can reroute towards having faith in the generosity of God. Transitioning from single to married takes decisive steps, just like any other thing that we seek to do in life. If you’re doing something that you shouldn’t be doing, or you’re not doing what you should be doing, and you’re not quite certain where you’re veering off the path, ask our generous God if you can’t figure it out. He won’t be mad about it. Through the Holy Spirit, He’ll tell you exactly what you need to do in order to receive the blessing you so earnestly desire. ■

    Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

    “It’s Just So Unfair!”, written for Findingchristianman.com©2019.  All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord!

  • Your Amazing Grace

    Your Amazing Grace

    Thank You for Your amazing grace. When I think about all You have done for me through Jesus Christ, I know I could never thank You enough. You saved me, brought me into Your family, gave me the gift of the Holy Spirit, and called me to live a life that pleases You. I didn’t earn any of this. I couldn’t have made myself worthy of it. You loved me and chose to pour Your grace over my life because that is who You are. Your Word says that Your grace is all I need and that Your power works best in weakness. Thank You, Father, because there have been plenty of times when I have been weak, and Your grace has been right there to meet me.

    Please forgive me for the times I haven’t lived like the woman You’ve called me to be. I know better sometimes, Father, and still don’t do better. There are times when the Holy Spirit is leading me in one direction and I allow my feelings, my wants, or my own thinking to pull me in another. Forgive me for the times I’ve been stubborn, disobedient, impatient, or simply determined to have my own way. And please forgive me for the times I’ve allowed guilt and shame to make me pull away from You after I’ve gotten something wrong. Thank You for reminding me that I don’t have to hide from You. I can come to You, tell You the truth about what I’ve done, ask for Your forgiveness, and receive the grace You so freely give.

    Father, please help me live in a way that shows I belong to You. I can’t do this in my own strength, and I don’t want to try. Holy Spirit, please help me. Guide my thoughts, my words, my decisions, my relationships, and the way I treat people. When I’m tempted to do something I know isn’t right, give me the strength to choose differently. When my attitude isn’t right, help me recognize it. When pride gets in the way, humble me. When I fall short, help me get back up and keep walking with You. I want to wear Your love like a second skin, so that the way I live and love makes it clear that Jesus Christ has changed my life.

    Thank You, Father, that Your grace doesn’t run out because I had a bad day or made a bad decision. Thank You that You are patient with me while I grow. I am so grateful that I don’t have to be perfect before I come to You, and I don’t have to fix myself before You will help me. Your grace meets me right where I am, but You love me too much to leave me there. Please keep teaching me, correcting me, strengthening me, and helping me become more like Christ. I want to be holy because You are holy, and I want my life to bring You glory.

    Thank You, Holy and Glorious Heavenly Father, for Your goodness, mercy, patience, kindness, and love. Thank You for every time Your grace covered me when I didn’t even realize how much I needed it. Thank You for Jesus Christ, who made this wonderful life with You possible, and thank You for the precious gift of the Holy Spirit. Your grace truly is amazing, Father, and I am so thankful it belongs to me through Jesus Christ. Please help me be a blessing to Your Kingdom, and let Your Will be done on earth as it is in heaven. In the precious and powerful name of Jesus Christ, I pray. Amen.

    “Your Amazing Grace”, written for FindChristianMan.com©2026.  All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord!

  • Jesus Christ Has Given Me the Keys

    Jesus Christ Has Given Me the Keys

    Dear Heavenly Father,

    I was asked today if I was ready to get married. I found it to be an interesting question because I find myself thinking more about my future these days, particularly as I get closer to finishing Nursing School. Things like where I may want to apply for a job, the environment I’ll be in, and who or how I’m going to meet my husband, are swirling around in my head.

    Whenever I think about my husband, whoever he may be, I visualize the type of man I see myself spending the rest of my life with. I think about the kind of man with whom I would like to a start a family. Like many women, I have my list of wants and qualities I’d like him to have, but Heavenly Father, I don’t want to make the mistake of being so stuck on what I want, that I back myself in a corner. Jesus Christ said in Matthew 16:19(NKJV), “And I will give you the keys of the kingdom of heaven, and whatever you bind on earth will be bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth will be loosed in heaven.” This is such a big deal, Heavenly Father! Through Christ, You’ve given us keys to open many doors, but those same keys can lock up some stuff as well, and God, I don’t want to lock myself out of blessings.

    Sometimes, our desires are spun from negatives like selfishness, arrogance, pride, greed, and ignorance. In 2Timothy 3:1-5 The Message (MSG), You tell us, “Don’t be naive. There are difficult times ahead. As the end approaches, people are going to be self-absorbed, money-hungry, self-promoting, stuck-up, profane, contemptuous of parents, crude, coarse, dog-eat-dog, unbending, slanderers, impulsively wild, savage, cynical, treacherous, ruthless, bloated windbags, addicted to lust, and allergic to God. They’ll make a show of religion, but behind the scenes they’re animals. Stay clear of these people.” You are telling us the kind of folks we should stay away from, and as Your children, You certainly don’t want us to have these kinds of qualities ourselves.

    When it comes to the qualities we desire in our future husbands, some of us place more value on his wallet than we do on the condition of his soul. Proverbs 28:25 says that greed leads to fighting and strife, but trusting You leads to prosperity. Many women are overly concerned about appearances. We feel that as a couple, we’ll have to look a certain way, with designer this or that. Your Word warns against such attitudes. It informs us of Your vehement dislike of a prideful heart, and in Proverbs 11:2, You tell us that arrogance will lead to disgrace and destruction.

    Motivations that stem from negatives will yield more negativity, and that’s why You warn us to guard our hearts against such things. Again, Jesus gave us the keys to the Kingdom. If our motives are wrong, we might bind the wrong thing or loose the wrong thing, and that’s not what You want. You want us humble, so that we’re pliable to Your Divine Will, because Your Will encompasses the very best for us. I stand in Your correction, Father, and say with as much conviction as I can muster, “Not my will but Your Will be done in my life!”

    In my mind, I may picture a man that I believe is perfect for me, but Father, You hold my tomorrows. Only You know what is best for me, and if it doesn’t come from You, I don’t want it!

    Heavenly Father, as so many of your daughters are making important life decisions and choices, please help us to be loosed from any obstructions or darkness that seeks to blind us from wonderful opportunities. Let us be loosed into purpose according to Your divine Will, and please help us to bind anything the devil sends to create confusion, havoc, dissension, and all manner of evil. You want us to have the best in life. Thank You for helping us to abstain from sin and be our best for You. Help us to make good decisions and store up treasures in heaven. According to Your divine Will, help us to recognize the man that You have ordained to be our husbands.

    Thank You for helping us to be a blessing to Your Kingdom, and let Your Will be done on earth as it is in heaven. In the precious and powerful name of Jesus Christ. Amen.

    Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

    “Jesus Christ Has Given Me the Keys” written by FACM, FindingChristianMan.Com ©2018.  All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord!

  • Let’s Wait Until We Get Married

    Let’s Wait Until We Get Married

    Dear Heavenly Father,

    this week I came across a video about two young married couples that abstained from sex until they were married. It immediately caught my attention because they were very young, in their early twenties. In our generation, it is very rare for a young couple to decide to wait until they get married to share themselves intimately. I love to see young couples live for You, Father, and choose to do it Your way. It shows that Your Word is on fire in their hearts. I pray that this level of commitment to Christ increases all over the world, and that because of it, many of Your children will be rewarded with strong marriages and families.

    One of the couples shared that they both, husband and wife, grew up in Christian homes, and were taught to be obedient to Your Word through abstinence. The young man’s story really intrigued me the most because he was very honest about the temptations he personally faced. There had been many times that he came close to having sex outside of marriage. He said that each time You kept him. This reminded me of what my grandmother tells me frequently about You. She says, “The Lord will always keep you if you want to be kept.”

    This young man expressed his gratitude for saving himself for his wife, because it was such a beautiful time for them both. He said the feelings and connection he experienced with his wife was so special, and “What if I had shared myself with someone that wasn’t my wife, and then a week later we never spoke again.” The sad part about this statement is that it happens all the time in today’s environment. Society has ‘normalized’ premarital sex to such a degree that hardly anyone thinks about how it displeases You. Your Word tells us in 1Corinthians 6:18 (NLT), “Run from sexual sin! No other sin so clearly affects the body as this one does. For sexual immorality is a sin against your own body.”

    We need to realize that You’re not telling us to abstain from sexual sin to make our pleasure any less. You are telling us how to protect our unions, so that we don’t give the enemy any ammunition to sow seeds of division, evil, and disharmony in our relationships. Sin causes a separation between You and us, and this isn’t what You want. In James 4:7, You tell us to humble ourselves before You and to resist the devil; because if we resist him, he will flee. James 4:8-10,17(NLT) says, “8 Come close to God, and God will come close to you. Wash your hands, you sinners; purify your hearts, for your loyalty is divided between God and the world. 9 Let there be tears for what you have done. Let there be sorrow and deep grief. Let there be sadness instead of laughter, and gloom instead of joy. 10 Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will lift you up in honor. 17 Remember, it is sin to know what you ought to do and then not do it.”

    It is dangerous to be fully aware of the right way to please You, and purposely choose to ignore Your Will. Help us, Dear Father, to always choose love—Your love, because it will draw us closer to You, so that You can protect us and keep our relationships bound in the unity of Your peace. Please help us to remain strong in our convictions to honor our body temples, because 1Corinthians 6:19 tells us that our bodies are YOUR temple; they house Your Precious Holy Spirit. Thank You for blessing every believer with a wonderful and loving marital partner should they desire it. Thank You for helping us to be a blessing to Your Kingdom, and let Your Will be done on earth as it is in heaven. In the precious and powerful name of Jesus Christ. Amen.

    Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

    “Let’s Wait Until We Get Married” written by FACM, Finding A Christian Man.Com ©2018.  All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord!

     

  • Please Help Me Remain Obedient to Your Will

    Please Help Me Remain Obedient to Your Will

    Dear Heavenly Father,

    Thank You for placing people in my life that know Your Word and can offer me words of Godly encouragement and wisdom when I need it most. Recently, I had a very informative conversation with a close family member. Her counsel was so spot on and razor-sharp that it cut through all my reservations and doubts. It revealed the heart of Your desire for my life. In Proverbs 27:17(NLT), You said “As iron sharpens iron, so a friend sharpens a friend.” You’ve made a way for us to be friends like this—friends that sharpen. I’m so thankful that You’ve provided us with truthful wisdom and knowledge that never fails.

    As sisters in Christ, we need people that will be honest with us, and tell us the truth when we might not want to hear it. This is especially true when it comes to new guys that we meet. We can become so excited about someone new that we lose our way. We forget that the Lord Jesus Christ will guide us through the right relationship with the right person. As a young woman, not only am I blessed to witness women of God that are obedient to Your Word, but I have also witnessed the blessings they receive because of their obedience to You.

    The Godly woman whose counsel I sought was single for a while, but has recently been blessed to meet a man that does many kind and generous deeds for her. On some occasions, she has been moved to tears by his acts of kindness. In our conversation, I asked if she was emotional because he made her feel so special. She answered by telling me that she was overwhelmed by how You moved through the man to bless her. It’s the favor You’ve shown her by working through this man that delights her heart. She is witnessing Your favor and Your faithfulness to Your promises.

    Psalm 5:12 (NLT) declares, “For you bless the godly, O Lord; you surround them with your shield of love.” Thank You, Father, that Your favor is a reward of obedience to Your Will. This is what happens when we please You—when we seek the help of the indwelling Holy Spirit to make decisions and choices that honor You. Please help us to remember that the way to have the life we desire is to follow the example of Jesus Christ, because he is the way, the truth, and the life!

    Some of my other friends make compromises to please their boyfriends. In many ways, they are idolizing the man, making him their everything. This is never okay. It injures our relationship with You and causes us to go backward instead of forward. You want us to be loving and kind to those we care about, and You want us to show them our gratitude, but we must do so according to Your loving standards, not our own. Matthew 6:33 tells us to seek You first in all things. This is the way to make sure that our new relationships become lasting ones. All blessings flow from You! Please help us, Heavenly Father, as women, to trust that obedience to Your Will and Word will always be rewarded.

    Thank You, Holy and Glorious Heavenly Father for helping us to be a blessing to Your Kingdom. In the precious and powerful name of Jesus Christ. Amen.

    Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

    “Please Help Me Remain Obedient to Your Will” written for Finding A Christian Man.Com ©2018.  All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord!

  • The Blessed Roles of Husband and Wife

    The Blessed Roles of Husband and Wife

    Dear Heavenly Father,

    The world has an agenda that is very different from Yours. It has distorted the roles of the man and the woman. It has done so to such a degree that the blessedness of their unique gifts is no longer held sacred. I remember the first time I heard the word ‘chivalry’. Even after I learned the definition, it seemed foreign among the people my age. My mother taught me that things like holding the door open, giving up a seat, and paying for dinner on the first date are all a part of chivalry towards women. These are courtesies of kindness demonstrated by the man, not because he thinks women are less, but exactly the opposite; he appreciates that women are a gift from God.

    On the other side of the coin, many women today think that the way into a man’s heart is to compromise their bodies. They don’t believe they are obligated to obey Your command in 1Corinthians 6:18(NLT) that tells us, “Run from sexual sin! No other sin so clearly affects the body as this one does. For sexual immorality is a sin against your own body.” Many of Your daughters do exactly the opposite of this verse, because they believe it is the way to get a ring on their fingers.

    Romans 12:1(NLT) tells us, “And so, dear brothers and sisters,[fn] I plead with you to give your bodies to God because of all he has done for you. Let them be a living and holy sacrifice—the kind he will find acceptable. This is truly the way to worship him.” Heavenly Father, You’re telling us what to do with our bodies. We are to present them to You as a sacrifice that is alive and thriving, fully engaged in worshipping and glorifying Your Holy Name.

    In Romans 12:2, You told us not to copy the behavior of this world, but we’re so mixed up in it that we don’t even recognize Your agenda. You told us to be transformed by the renewing of our minds to Your Word, but we’re not doing this, and that’s why we’re so confused about the roles of men and women. We are forgetting how wonderfully You’ve sanctioned, anointed, and appointed these roles for the uplifting of Your Kingdom. Many of us Christians have allowed Your Word to be watered down in our hearts, and we are not examining ourselves based on what You have called us to do. We’ve got to make a change, so that Your peace and blessings will abide over us.

    2Thessalonians 3:5(NLT) says, “May the Lord lead your hearts into a full understanding and expression of the love of God and the patient endurance that comes from Christ.” Please bless us to wake up and realize that this is where we need to be. Father, unity is an expression of Your love. We must pray this prayer in 2Thessalonians 3:5, so that we bring ourselves back to the unity of purpose that You ordained for men and women.

    The man is Your gift to women, and the woman is Your gift to men. Our roles are different, but they are equally important to You. Your Word so clearly tells us the order that You’ve set up. Help us to open our eyes and recognize that Your Word and Will is the best way. You have a plan for our happiness, but we must be obedient and humble, and not think that we know best. As sisters in Christ, help us to be respectful of our temples, to honor our commitment to Christ, and to recognize and appreciate the gift of a man whose heart is pure towards You. Help our brothers in Christ to walk in obedience to Your Word, to fulfill their obligation to Christ, and to value the gift of a Godly woman. Help us to be committed and spiritually strong in our Lord Jesus Christ, so that we are fit for the roles of husband and wife.

    Thank You, Holy and Glorious Heavenly Father for helping us to be a blessing to Your Kingdom. In the precious and powerful name of Jesus Christ. Amen.

    Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

    “The Blessed Roles of Husband and Wife”, written by FACM, Finding A Christian Man.Com ©2018.  All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord!

     

     

  • What NOT to Do When the Relationship is New

    What NOT to Do When the Relationship is New

    When I was a teenager, like most kids my age, I wanted everything quick, fast, and on the double. Not only did I want my desires delivered with all due haste, this was the approach to just about everything else I did as well. I rushed through my homework, and I couldn’t wait until the hard classes were over…and my chores, forget about it! Lickety split was putting it lightly; I bulldozed through those. My grandmother would constantly tell me, “It takes time to do anything the right way!” She called my quick, half-hearted approach ‘half-doing something’, and she couldn’t stand it. I can’t count the number of times she scolded me about rushing through things and missing those important details that make all the difference. I paid no attention to those words back then, but today they are my continual motivation and the theme song of my life.

    My grandmother’s wisdom is spot on with the wisdom of God’s Word. At the end of the day, everything is going to come back to us with the same energy and effort we used to put it out there. In Luke 6:38, Jesus Christ solidifies the reality that it is more of a blessing to give than to receive. He tells us that giving equals receiving, and that the amount we give will determine the amount we get back. This is mathematics at its best. God has woven this kind of order into His extraordinary laws; it’s how the universe was created by Him to function.

    This is one of the reasons it is so important to comprehend that we are indeed spiritual beings, because everything that we do has a spiritual consequence. It only takes a few major disappointments to hit this one home. We can mess things up royally and miss great opportunities for love, success, and well-being because we’ve made a habit pattern of rushing things. We’ve all heard the saying that good things come to those who wait. This is more than just a saying. Again, with this reference, there’s some biblical wisdom involved.

    Don’t Neglect God’s Peace
    The prophet says of God in Isaiah 26:3(NLT), “You will keep in perfect peace all who trust in you, all whose thoughts are fixed on you!” It is no secret that the believer who trusts in God’s perfect timing will be guided by His peace. When it comes to a new relationship, the guidance of God’s peace is the only way to ensure solid footing not just for potential longevity, but for your continued spiritual well-being, regardless of how things work out.

    In a new relationship, we can’t make assumptions or jump to conclusions; both can cause major disappointments in the long run. They are sure signs that we’re allowing anxiety to call the shots, and this allows the enemy room to mess things up. Again, the absolute best approach is to let the peace of God guide all your actions.

    Don’t Be Impatient
    Romans 5:3 tells us that tribulations give us a work-out in patience and endurance. We dislike the discomfort, heartache, and pain that come from troubling situations; as well we should. They are not sent by our Heavenly Father, but they are a part of life, and we can learn from them. Tribulations, particularly those involving past relationships, hopefully teach us to be patient and to look next time before we leap; at least that’s the lesson we should have learned.

    Sisters that have been praying a while to cross paths with the right person may not be aware of their own feelings of deprivation. They may have unreasonable expectations, and these can smother a relationship in the beginning. Loving ourselves means that we will give our souls the time they need to hear from the Spirit. One of the greatest mistakes we make is to underestimate the willingness of God to help us stay on track and pace ourselves, so that we move in alignment with His divine timing. We can tell the difference between a blessing and a trick by having the patience to wait and make sure we see God at work.

    Don’t Out-pace the Relationship
    Again, when we start expecting too much too soon, we can out-pace a new relationship. It’s good to be a careful observer of yourself and make sure you don’t expect a commitment before the man is ready to make it. Being patient means that you’re willing to gauge yourself, and that you are watchful of the new person’s queues. Good practice is to mirror his actions in a way that is both caring and cautious.

    He calls or texts; then you reciprocate, but don’t do too much. And never feel pressured to compromise Godliness to keep a man. God would not present you with a situation where you had to do this. Be prayerful continually, and listen closely for the direction of the Holy Spirit.

    Peace, Patience, and Pace; honoring these will continually keep you aligned with Christ, so that you will know if the new man is a presentation from God. If he is, the Holy Spirit will continue to guide you, so that your new relationship grows. If he isn’t, you’ll have gained invaluable spiritual discernment and insight that has prepared you for the blessing that is surely on its way. ■

    “What NOT to Do When the Relationship is New”, written by FACM, Finding A Christian Man.Com ©2018.  All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord!