Finding A Christian Man

A Heart Consumed with the Love of Christ

October 14, 2024

Devotions

“One of the Pharisees asked Jesus to have dinner with him, so Jesus went to his home and sat down to eat. 37 When a certain immoral woman from that city heard he was eating there, she brought a beautiful alabaster jar filled with expensive perfume. 38 Then she knelt behind him at his feet, weeping. Her tears fell on his feet, and she wiped them off with her hair. Then she kept kissing his feet and putting perfume on them.”
Luke 7:36-38(NLT)

God has given us many gifts and blessings, but the one thing He hasn’t given any of us is the ability to see into another person’s heart. Only He can do that. The only way that you and I can know an individual’s heart is if he or she reveals it to us. Often, they do so at the most unassuming times. We can see who a person is at their very cores by their actions. Intentionally cutting someone off while driving, taking a parking space that someone was waiting on, hurting the feelings of others by refusing to filter out negativity; these are just a few actions that tell us that the love of God isn’t deeply rooted in a person’s heart. Our true character is the core of who we are, and just like the sinful woman that kissed Jesus’ feet, it will always be exposed.

The woman in this record in Luke 7 was referred to as sinful because of how she chose to make a living. She was believed to be a prostitute and according to Simon, the Pharisee host that day, she had many sins. The Pharisees were vehemently against the teachings of Jesus, so this was not a friendly dinner that he attended, and Simon was a rather rude host. The culture at the time this record was written was such that hospitality was extremely important. There were gestures and practices of etiquette that were always observed, but Simon didn’t honor Jesus according to the usual customs. The woman, however, did. She honored Christ in a way that changed her life.

When she found out that Jesus was at the Pharisee’s house, she didn’t care what others thought of her. She needed to see him, and she put her love for Jesus on full display. She washed his feet with her tears, dried them with her hair, kissed his feet continually and anointed them with ointment. Jesus Christ knew of her past sin, and in normal circumstances, had he been another prophet, she would not have been allowed to touch him. Our beloved Lord and Savior, the Son of the Living God, showed her and us that he is touchable. He forgave her sins that day because he saw her heart.

Simon thought Jesus Christ had done the wrong thing by this woman, but Jesus Christ set him straight. Luke 7:44-47(NLT) says, “44 Then he turned toward the woman and said to Simon, “Do you see this woman? I came into your house. You did not give me any water for my feet, but she wet my feet with her tears and wiped them with her hair. 45 You did not give me a kiss, but this woman, from the time I entered, has not stopped kissing my feet. 46 You did not put oil on my head, but she has poured perfume on my feet. 47 Therefore, I tell you, her many sins have been forgiven—as her great love has shown. But whoever has been forgiven little loves little.”

Like the woman in this record, all of us have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God. Every person that Jesus Christ met during his sojourn on earth was a sinner, and he came to deliver us all from the bondage of darkness. As single women, we must recognize that God is looking at our hearts. He’s looking to see if we have the kind of heart that will honor Christ over a man and the man’s desire for sexual sin outside of marriage. Will we put Christ first is always the question, and our actions to do so will always reveal the answer.

God commands us in Colossians 2:7(NLT), “Let your roots grow down into him, and let your lives be built on him. Then your faith will grow strong in the truth you were taught, and you will overflow with thankfulness.” Our roots are our cores, and to be anchored in Christ is to let our roots grow down into him, so that every aspect of our being is saturated in his love. It is to be committed to God’s Word and to be unmovable on it, no matter who comes into our lives.

Our Heavenly Father desires us to live according to His standard, and He looks at our hearts, because they tell the true story about how genuine our love for Him really is. 1Corinthians 4:20 tells us that the Kingdom of God is not just a lot of talk, it’s power! It’s everything to us, and we must live in a way that conveys we believe and honor this. Jesus Christ said in John 14:21(NLT), “Those who accept my commandments and obey them are the ones who love me. And because they love me, my Father will love them.” Let’s remember this always. If we live by it, we can be confident that when God looks our hearts, He’ll see them consumed with the love of Christ, and this means they are open to receive all that He has in store. ■

Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

“A Heart Consumed with the Love of Christ”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2024. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

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Agree to Walk Together

October 7, 2024

Relationship advice, Spiritual Preparation for Marriage Lessons

Ecclesiastes 4:9-10 (ESV)
“9 Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their toil. 10 For if they fall, one will lift up his fellow. But woe to him who is alone when he falls and has not another to lift him up!”

The passage in Ecclesiastes 4:9-10 is so plain and simple to understand, and it’s because that’s how God intended relationships to be. They are not meant to be nearly as complicated as we make them. Through King Solomon, God makes known His wisdom regarding unity and working together. It’s very important to the foundation of a marriage that two people are there for each other, that they have each other’s back, and will lift one another up when life gets hard.

Amos 3:3(KJV) asks a question and the answer to it is crucial for the unity of a marriage. It asks, “Can two walk together, except they be agreed?” The answer is simple and poignant. Two people can’t walk together through life unless there is agreement between them. If they can’t mutually agree to be dedicated to their union, one will walk in one direction, and the other will go the opposite route. So, this decision to come together and be committed to God in a marriage is an extremely important one. It is both incredibly fulfilling for the couple and very meaningful to their relationship with God.

Relationships mean a lot to Heavenly Father because people mean the most to Him. He wanted a family to love, so why wouldn’t He want His sons and daughters to experience this deep love in an intimate way. He wants a husband and wife to stand back to back, armed with the sword of the Spirit and poised to protect their union with the spiritual weaponry God has provided. Once we decide that we desire marriage, we should begin that very moment to spiritually prepare for it. We should understand what’s at stake and recognize that if we leave an opening in the marriage, the enemy will maximize that opportunity.

God tells us in 1Peter 5:8(ESV), “Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour.” Heavenly Father doesn’t make mistakes. He wouldn’t warn us in this verse to be focused and watchful if we didn’t need to be. Before you give a man the kind of access to your life that a serious relationship requires, God wants you to be strengthened in His Word. He wants your eyes and ears to be tuned into Him and His direction, and He wants you to be full of Holy Spirit power. Several years ago, dating didn’t require as much vigilance and scrutiny, but today it does, and God wants you to be equipped with wisdom, discipline, and spiritual maturity. You need to make good choices and have sound judgment, because this is what prepares you for marriage.

As a single person, you need to be aware of yourself in ways that you’ve never thought about. We don’t realize how much of the world’s messages we’ve absorbed about relationships and marriage until we’re confronted with our lack of faith to hold one together. Some of us have never set boundaries for a relationship that help us stick to the Word in certain areas. In our pasts, we’ve crossed lines, said things and done things that were disrespectful to the man’s manhood and injurious to his relationship with God. We caused him to sin or participated in it with him. This is costly. We were not as committed to God as we should have been, and therefore, the relationship didn’t have the fuel needed for the long haul. It’s time to make a shift.

When we disrespect the significant man in our lives, we have to get that back, because we reap what we sow. And when it comes back to us, it can be so bad that the rift severs the relationship. Then, we’re bewildered because we haven’t shown the accountability for our actions that a successful relationship must have.

The Apostle Paul said in Ephesians 4:1-3(NLT), “1 Therefore I, a prisoner for serving the Lord, beg you to lead a life worthy of your calling, for you have been called by God. 2 Always be humble and gentle. Be patient with each other, making allowance for each other’s faults because of your love. 3 Make every effort to keep yourselves united in the Spirit, binding yourselves together with peace.” This is God’s commandment, and He created us to bring Him glory with our lives and with our marriages. He never intended relationships to be a burden, nor should they be our everything. Through our unions, we’re to delight in Christ together. We’re to complement each other, not complicate each other’s lives.

Walking in agreement as a married couple is a tremendous blessing because God designed it that way, but we must be ready, and full of God’s power and Word. We have way too many flaws, insecurities, and doubts to ever navigate relationships on our own. Let God’s Word be the instruction for your life and let the Lord Jesus Christ guide you to have the kind of relationship that pleases our Heavenly Father and you too. Do all that you can to be in agreement with God, and pray and ask Him to guide you so that you will know how to be in agreement with your future spouse.■

English Standard Version (ESV)
The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. ESV® Text Edition: 2016. Copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers.

Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

“Agree to Walk Together”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2024. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

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No One Compares to God

August 26, 2024

Your Relationship with God

“But someone who does not know, and then does something wrong, will be punished only lightly. When someone has been given much, much will be required in return; and when someone has been entrusted with much, even more will be required.”
Luke 12:48(NLT)

Many Christian women are resorting to desperate measures to satisfy their desire for partnership. Years ago, I worked with a woman that had been accustomed to that practice. She was struggling as a new believer in the Lord Jesus Christ. Finally meeting someone she liked, she confided in me about her new relationship and the difficulties she faced while dating and pursuing a relationship with God. I told her it was completely understandable because I too had gone through similar circumstances. She said to me, “I can’t imagine you’d ever have difficulty because you’ve been a believer for so long.” Many people assume that Christian believers that have been on this journey awhile have it easy. They don’t think we struggle to keep the faith or that we are challenged with temptation. Nothing could be further from the truth.

Whether we’re new to the faith or seasoned believers, significant relationships can be a very challenging area. We all have a cross to bear, and it demands us to release our old man habits. It’s those negative attitudes, addictions, toxic emotions, and immoral and unproductive thoughts, conversations, and behaviors that are totally foreign to our new nature in Christ. God tells us in Colossians 3:9-10(NLT), “9 Don’t lie to each other, for you have stripped off your old sinful nature and all its wicked deeds. 10 Put on your new nature, and be renewed as you learn to know your Creator and become like him.”

Many of us haven’t lined up with Colossians 3:9-10. Even those of us that have been on this Christian journey a while are still struggling to release parts of our old sinful nature that continue to hold us back and keep our blessings at bay. God’s desire is that we become spiritually strengthen through His Word before we get into serious relationships. He knows the complexities and knows that we need His faith, love, and power to navigate through them. Some of us veterans ignore this.

The quantity of time on this Christian journey isn’t nearly as important as the quality of our relationship with God. What matters most is the depth of our love for Him and our allegiance to express our faith in Him through the love we demonstrate to others daily. Our increasing faith in God’s love strengthens and equips us to surrendeTHANr all, and God’s expectation is that we will come to a place in our walk in Christ where we long for Him more than we do for any other thing or person.

When our love for God is where it needs to be, we will not view sin or its temptations as a very difficult thing. The love of God will be the most important treasure in our lives. Our faith will be at a level of understanding that what we gain through Godliness is infinitely greater than the old nature we release and the baggage we surrender. Many of us are not believing this way.

We fear that the man won’t love us if we refuse him or refuse to sin with him. The thing that must be etched in our hearts in gold is that God’s righteousness is the jewel of eternity. Every woman whose status is currently single must get this. She must understand that nothing and no one compares to God. He’s brilliant beyond brilliance, perfect beyond perfection, beautiful beyond beauty, and lovely beyond loveliness. There’s nothing a man can give you that is anywhere near what the Father can and wants to give you. So, a man’s desire to take you out of Godliness should never supersede your desire to be holy.

There are many sisters out there that feel like the woman I knew who struggled with living holy in a relationship with a man that isn’t bound by marriage. Some would say that it’s crazy in this day and age to live by God’s standard in a boyfriend and girlfriend relationship. We can think however we choose, but God doesn’t change and neither does His standard. It isn’t enough to know that no one compares to Him, your actions must back up this reality every day of your life.

God is wonderful and following His example through Christ is our greatest privilege. There are many women that are not trusting God with all their hearts and not following where He leads; instead they are leaning on their own understanding. This more than any other thing is the reason for the imprisonment of never ending singledom. As a Christian woman desiring marriage, God requires our highest level of love and commitment to Him. He must be first in our hearts. In other words, you must have a heart that seeks to please Him above all else. It is what He looks for in every believing woman that will be presented to a man as a treasure of a wife.■

Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

“No One Compares to God”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2024. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

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Convinced of His Love

August 19, 2024

Encouragement and Inspiration

Colossians 2:10 (NLT)
“So you also are complete through your union with Christ, who is the head over every ruler and authority.”

When relationships don’t work out, it can be devastating to our lives, especially when it’s clear that our partner’s feelings have changed for us. When things were good, you never thought that he would betray your trust and diminish what you brought to the relationship. You were friends, and you can’t believe that your friend would cause you so much heartache. When we go through hurtful situations like this, the emotions and feelings we experience from the aftermath can be very surprising.

One of those surprising feelings is the sheer terror that we experience internally from the loss of the relationship. We don’t quite know what to do with it, and the anxiety it causes sometimes makes us do things we never thought we would. Some of us will badger the ex or worse, go after his new girlfriend. We lose it emotionally, and we’re terrified of reaching the bottom of all that pain and only find that there’s more of it.

God commands us in Psalm 37:8(NLT), “Stop being angry! Turn from your rage! Do not lose your temper–it only leads to harm.” When we use profane language, slander, and violence as a way of coping with pain, we’re providing an opening for satan to punish us more. When we take our disappointment, anger, and sadness out on others, we’re punishing ourselves by digging a deeper hole of darkness. These are actions that keep us separated from the right person that God has ordained to walk with us through life. Actions that go against the grain of God’s love are never sanctioned by Him. Jesus Christ offers us the best way to deal with our heartache, and it requires us to keep a steady head, a stable heart, and a deep commitment to prayer.

Another emotional low is the dip in our self-esteem when someone falls out of love with us. We sometimes beat ourselves up for not recognizing the signs, or we become depressed because we think we’re not enough or not loveable. Feeling this way is a sure indicator that we need to seek the Lord with all that we are. We allow a broken relationship to injure our self-esteem because we depended way too much on another individual to validate our self-worth.

Only God can validate our worth, and He did this thousands of years ago when He sent His only begotten Son to the earth to give his life as a sacrifice for our sins. If we treasure the gift of eternal life, and if we honor our relationship with God, one of the things we must make absolutely sure we never do, and that’s nullify the cross of Christ in any way. Jesus died for us, and this shows us the depth of God’s love, and the depth of Jesus’s love. If we have placed more focus on our pain than we do on the suffering of Christ, we need to make a change, and do it quickly.

1Corinthians 6:19-20(NLT) tells us, “19 Don’t you realize that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit, who lives in you and was given to you by God? You do not belong to yourself, 20 for God bought you with a high price. So you must honor God with your body.” We are God’s children. We belong to Him totally and completely. Christ purchased us from the realm of darkness with his blood. So, we should never look to another human being for validation. Do as Jesus Christ commanded the disciples in Matthew 10:15(NLT). If a household did not accept his message, he told the disciples to “shake its dust from your feet as you leave.” In other words, Jesus is instructing them to shake off the rejection, the sadness, the putting yourself down, and continue walking in the confidence of who God has made you.

We must have faith in our Heavenly Father. Be convinced of God’s love for you and let that be your anchor continually in life. We hurt down deep because we haven’t allowed that place to be exposed to the love of Jesus Christ. We can change this. We must pray for God’s healing, commit ourselves to be guided by His Holy Spirit, and have the courage and faith to push past the fear.

As a woman of God, you are never to be stuck in the quicksand of doubt and self-sabotage. Shake that loose! You are a child of the King. Let the love of Christ be your everlasting garment, and never stoop so low as to want someone that doesn’t want you. If the brother has not chosen to value you as God’s daughter and to see you as the treasure God created you to be, shake it off, bid him well, and in God’s grace, keep it moving.■

Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

“Convinced of God’s Love”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2024. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

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God Chose You and Your Husband Will Too

August 12, 2024

Spiritual Preparation for Marriage Lessons

You might wonder why God placed the desire to be married in your heart when you don’t have a significant man in your life yet. This is no doubt a question on the minds of many Christian single women. We know that God requires us to have faith, and this means that our minds and hearts must get onboard with His incredible grace, mercy, power, and love. Foundational to building your faith is the knowledge that God desires your happiness in life and marriage more than you do for yourself. You must believe this truth wholeheartedly, but many single Christian women are struggling with it. They’ve been praying for a husband for a long time, and they are not understanding why they continue to have to wait.

Ephesians 1:11(NLT) tells us, “Furthermore, because we are united with Christ, we have received an inheritance from God, for he chose us in advance, and he makes everything work out according to his plan.” God predestined us long before we were born. He chose each of us to be His children, and He has a plan for our lives. We can be confident that this plan includes the person He has ordained to be our spouse. We must have fully persuaded faith in this, and the reality of God’s good plan for us must be cemented in our minds and hearts.

It’s true that as responsible brothers and sisters in Christ, we must be spiritually prepared to steward the blessing we are praying to receive. This is a truth we often overlook, and it is the biggest reason we feel we’re experiencing a delay. God requires us to be good stewards of His blessings, and this is especially true when it comes to the treasure of another’s heart. When it comes to being someone’s partner for life, many of us haven’t invested the time to strengthen our weaknesses and sharpen our strengths. We’re the same today as we were a year ago, and that’s not a good look for spiritual maturity in Christ.

To be a good steward of God’s blessings means that we are capable and responsible for overseeing the care and good management of the blessing we’ve prayed to receive. In 1Peter, chapter 4, we’re taught to have self-control and a stable mind. We’re commanded to show hospitality to others, and we’re reminded of the special spiritual gift each of us has received. 1Peter 4:10 (ESV) tells us, “As each has received a gift, use it to serve one another, as good stewards of God’s varied grace:”

From the very beginning, God teaches us about stewardship. Genesis 2:15(ESV) says, “The Lord God took the man and put him in the garden of Eden to work it and keep it.” God plopped Adam in the middle of a glorious and perfect paradise, the garden of Eden, but Adam couldn’t sit around on the plush grass all day twiddling his thumbs. He had to steward. He had to take care of the blessings God has placed in his care.

In 1Corinthians 4:2(ESV), God teaches us more about the management skills He desires good stewards to have. This verse says, “Moreover, it is required of stewards that they be found trustworthy.” It doesn’t matter what others say about how you manage the blessings of your salvation, life, and gifts. What matters is God’s judgment about your preparedness to receive and manage what He gives you. The Apostle Paul said in 1Corinthians 4:4,5 (NLT), “It is the Lord himself who will examine me and decide. For he will bring our darkest secrets to light and will reveal our private motives. Then God will give to each one whatever praise is due.”

You must remember that God chose you, and there isn’t anything about your life that He doesn’t know. When you do the things that He requires to increase your faith, trust and believe the right man will choose you. Ephesians 6:11 says that you’ve been equipped by God to stand firm against ALL strategies of the devil. So, put on all God’s armor, then you won’t allow the enemy to continue stealing from you.

Don’t give up, don’t give in, and never blame God for what you don’t have. Psalm 84:11 tells us that He doesn’t withhold any good thing from those who love and honor Him. So, do what God tells you to do. Stay in His Word, pray continually, and stop looking everywhere else for what can only be found in Jesus Christ. Seek God for strategies that will help you grow spiritually and ask Him to prepare you to be a wife that stewards His blessing of a husband well.

Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

English Standard Version (ESV)
The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. ESV® Text Edition: 2016. Copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers.

“God Chose You and Your Husband Will Too”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2024. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

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The Blessing That God Promises

August 5, 2024

Encouragement and Inspiration

Frustration is an emotional state of being that can cause us to become stuck and unable to successfully move forward. It is described as a feeling of being annoyed and upset because of an inability to achieve a certain result or to change a circumstance or condition. Many single women are experiencing frustration in their desire to establish a relationship with the man God has ordained to walk with them through life. They’ve been praying to meet this man and have been doing so quite a long while. If we cut right down to the meat of the matter, we’d discover that it isn’t so much the wait that frustrates them, but it’s the inability to do anything to move their marriage agenda along that gets their goat.

Proverbs 19:21(NLT) says, “You can make many plans, but the LORD’s purpose will prevail.” This verse makes it crystal clear that none of us can overstep God’s Will. What He has for you is for you, and the thing that isn’t in His Will and plan for your individual life isn’t worth having. Most of us know this, but for some reason, we’re not allowing ourselves to have peace and faith over the knowledge of God’s Will and His plan for this area of our lives. We’re not growing in faith as we should, and this is something that warrants more investigation on our parts.

The old “I know He can do it but will He do it for me?” syndrome knocks many of us off the block. It keeps us from the victorious standing of faith that God has given us in Christ. Psalm 84:11(NLT) says, “For the LORD God is our sun and our shield. He gives us grace and glory. The LORD will withhold no good thing from those who do what is right.” This is God’s promise! He will not withhold good things from His children. God desires a good spouse for us more than we desire it for ourselves, and He’s not holding the blessing of marriage from anyone.

So, one of the first things that some of us must do is get our heads together regarding the blessings and promises of God. 1John 5:4(NLT) declares, “For every child of God defeats this evil world, and we achieve this victory through our faith.” Our faith in God is the key that opens every door of opportunity according to His Will and plan for our lives. We don’t get to bypass the faith of Jesus Christ and skip over to rewards. It doesn’t work that way. God’s desire is to see us mature in Christ-like character and to represent Christ in the earth in every way. This is the Father’s heart, and this is what He requires.

God doesn’t keep anything regarding the faith of Jesus Christ a secret from us. He states the requirements very clearly, and we have to get on board. It’s not complicated. It’s simple. He tells us in James 2:26(NLT), “Just as the body is dead without breath, so also faith is dead without good works.” As a woman, your good works are those that signal the heavens and everything beneath them that you honor God supremely, and you are committed to live for Him.

Proverbs 14:1(NLT) says, “A wise woman builds her home, but a foolish woman tears it down with her own hand.” Rest assured that God is looking at how you have applied the wisdom of Proverbs 14:1 in your life. A wise woman builds. So, it’s only fitting that we look at what we’re building and ask ourselves if it is enough to sustain a marriage. Sometimes, the answer is “no”, and God wants us to lean on Him and get into His Word in a greater way so that He can teach us how to build a life, a marriage, and a family His way.

The reality is that we have a responsibility as God’s children and stewards of His blessings to represent Christ in the earth. If we’re not doing this to a degree that satisfies God’s requirement, then it’s our responsibility to reprioritize and rearrange some things in our lives so that God’s agenda is number one, and our agendas falls somewhere underneath. Jesus Christ commands us in Matthew 6:33(NLT) to “Seek the Kingdom of God above all else, and live righteously, and he will give you everything you need.” This is the Will of God, and it must be centerstage in our lives.

Philippians 4:19(ESV) states, “And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus.” This is God’s promise to every one of His kids. He does not lie, and not one of His promises can fall to the ground. God is faithful to His Word, and He is the only One that can supply our needs. Only He can move along the marriage agenda for our lives, and when we rest in this, frustration will fall away. So, increase your commitment to delight in God with your faith and diligence. Surrender to His care and pray that as you do, He will prepare you in every way to live according to His Will and to be the spouse that He has purposed you to be.■

Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

English Standard Version (ESV)
The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. ESV® Text Edition: 2016. Copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers.

“The Blessing That God Promises”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2024. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

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A Good Example of a Wife

July 29, 2024

Spiritual Preparation for Marriage Lessons

“Enjoy life with the wife whom you love, all the days of your vain life that he has given you under the sun, because that is your portion in life and in your toil at which you toil under the sun.”
Ecclesiastes 9:9 (ESV)

Over the summer, a dear friend invited me to attend to a gathering for a couple who’d recently celebrated their first-year wedding anniversary. I didn’t know much about them, but I had heard that they were both very independent people before they got married. In these modern times, ‘independent people’ is sometimes code for individuals who refuse to be tied down to anyone’s definition of the roles spouses typically assume. They are both in their early thirties, and after the wedding, they decided to move into the husband’s apartment which happens to be a fifteen-minute drive from his parents. My friend said to me, “Lord have mercy, I heard he’s having a difficult time adjusting to her not being able to cook. He’s constantly at his mother’s house for dinner.”

The realization that his wife doesn’t possess the skills that a wife has historically embodied is causing some frustrations. She’s frustrated that he isn’t more understanding, and he’s disappointed that she’s not tidy and doesn’t clean or cook. At the gathering, it was evident that they’re having problems. So, now they have to face the reality of trying to build a strong foundation in their marriage when neither of them seems to be happy with the other.

Proverbs 12:4(ESV) says, “An excellent wife is the crown of her husband, but she who brings shame is like rottenness in his bones.” Many of us look at this verse, mull it over two seconds, and move on about our business. God’s Word isn’t up for personal interpretation. Although we’d like to think we can put our own spin on what it means to be the crown in our future husbands’ lives, God has set the standard. He tells us that a virtuous woman is one that is devoted, wise, resourceful, kind, and willing to do every good for the benefit and welfare of her family. She knows what it is to bear a cross and does so with the conviction of her faith in God.

As women of faith in the Lord Jesus Christ, some of us are still clinging to the “no one’s perfect” argument, as if that excuses us from the commitment to be perfected in and by Christ. We don’t get to tell God how we should love our spouses and families; He has told us. We are to love according to the standard of Christ, because that is the kind of love that God wants all His daughters to receive in return.

In the Old Testament, men understood the tremendous benefit to their lives if they married a good woman. They understood that a wise choice would bless them richly, and a wrong choice would burden them for the rest of their lives. Take Abraham for instance. He received the promise of the Father to make him a man with descendants as numerous as the stars in the sky. Abraham understood that this blessing would pass from him to his Son, Isaac. He was adamant about the quality of woman his son would marry. Among other attributes, she had to be a woman who loved God, is of good character, and is humble and unselfish. Abraham left this in God’s hands and proceeded to send his servant on a mission to find the woman God had ordained.

Many of us have been praying to God for a husband for quite some time. We expect that the Father will present us with someone that He has ordained. Therefore, we assume this man will be loyal, loving, and devoted to us. We want him to be God’s kind of special, yet we’re not thinking that we should be just as prepared to be a crown in his life as he will be to our lives. One man could have one idea of what a crown of a woman is to him, and another man could have a completely different need. Your responsibility to be prepared to be a crown for the one God has for YOU. If you don’t know how to be the woman your future spouse will treasure, make a shift in your prayer life and ask God to teach you. Then be humble enough to learn.

Our future husbands will not be perfect, and neither are we, but we are being perfected in Christ, and God expects us to live as though we know this. As a woman desiring marriage, you must meet the example of a good wife according to God’s standards, not your own. Don’t let that slip by you. Our Heavenly Father tells us in Jeremiah 29:11 that He knows the plans He has for us. He knows the man that is ordained to be your husband. Seek God! Do what He tells you to do so that you’ll meet His standard and be as much of a treasure to your husband as he will be to you. ■

Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

English Standard Version (ESV)
The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. ESV® Text Edition: 2016. Copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers.

“A Good Example of a Wife”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2024. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

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A Strong Companionship

July 22, 2024

Spiritual Preparation for Marriage Lessons

Ecclesiastes 4:9-12(NLT)
“9 Two people are better off than one, for they can help each other succeed. 10 If one person falls, the other can reach out and help. But someone who falls alone is in real trouble. 11 Likewise, two people lying close together can keep each other warm. But how can one be warm alone? 12 A person standing alone can be attacked and defeated, but two can stand back-to-back and conquer. Three are even better, for a triple-braided cord is not easily broken.”

In significant relationships, companionship is extremely important. Companionship is a partnership among two people who share the same interest of connecting and developing a meaningful relationship. It’s a friendship so true that the bond is deep and not easily broken. On its own, this level of companionship in some instances can be so rewarding that many people would choose it over marriage. It’s having someone you can count on, someone that you know has your back. This is what many of us find convenient, because it comes without the stress of looking for something deeper and the disappointment of not finding it.

Nowadays, people choose a nice companionship over marriage because they perceive it as an easier commitment to handle. For many, our modern precepts for companionship leave out marriage altogether. For some men, it becomes a rendition of friendship that includes some of the benefits of marriage but places no demands on exclusivity. So, now, when people say, “this is my companion”, people automatically assume marriage is out and that these two folks have opted to have each other’s back devoid of the kind of closeness a marriage builds. This kind of companionship is one of the ways that we’ve drummed up to avoid problems of heartache and loneliness. If this is our choice, we must be very careful not to displease God with it.

We must be clear that when God set the boundaries of companionship, it was within the confines of marriage. Within their marital union, Adam and Eve were companions in every way. There can be no doubt in our minds that God ordained marriage to be the sleeve that surrounded the companionship between a man and woman. This is what God sanctioned, and to keep a companionship pleasing to Him, Ecclesiastes 4:9-12 presents some very important guideposts we need to follow.

Two people are better off than one

If you can have someone who truly cares about your well-being and there is a mutual trust and admiration for one another, you have found a gem. An arm around your shoulders in tough times, holding hands, and good conversations that leave you feeling fulfilled and understood can go a long way. To protect this connection, you must keep it holy and uncompromised by physical intimacy.

For they can help each other succeed

As we mature in years, life can become more challenging. Having a companion by your side when you are tackling these challenges increases your confidence. This can lead to your success over obstacles. We don’t have all the answers, and a wise sounding board can make a huge difference in our decision making. This kind of trust and loyalty is built over time, and both the man and woman must be committed to help each other with no ulterior motives in mind.

If one person falls, the other can reach out and help

To fall down and have the strength and agility to get back up can be hard. Many of us lean on a trusted companion. Often, they are the ones that God sends to help us get back on our feet. They can be a shoulder to cry on and be a blessing to our healing process. We should never neglect to demonstrate our gratitude to God for placing this person in our lives. We should also demonstrate our gratitude to this man, but we should never take steps to make the companionship more than what God ordained it to be.

A person standing alone can be attacked and defeated, but two can stand back-to-back and conquer

A companion that has your back is truly a blessing from God. You will see the Father working through them to be a blessing to you many times. This is what He does, He works through people to help us, and we are often surprised at the level they will go to in order to be in our corner. When you find a man like this, don’t ruin it by stepping over the lines God has established. Protect this blessing with the spiritual maturity of self-control.

Sinful behavior is left out of the equation

Many companionships will not lead to marriage. They are with men that are sent to be a blessing to your life, and you to theirs. Never jump the gun. Don’t automatically assume this man is ordained to be your husband. Until God tells you that you’re in the company of your future spouse, keep your companions as the very best of friends. Keep those boundaries intact, understanding that the spiritual maturity you demonstrate in companionship is the discipline that equips you for what comes next.■

Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

“A Strong Companionship”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2024. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

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Don’t Ignore the Warnings

July 15, 2024

Relationship advice

We’re living in a time that is like no other. We’re more intelligent than perhaps any other generation, and yet relationships seem to be much more complicated than they’ve ever been. Many single people are looking for compatible partners and complain that its like finding a needle in a haystack. Women say there aren’t any good men out there and men say the same about women. It’s a quandary that causes a tremendous amount of frustration and loneliness as a single person. We have to know that this isn’t what God had in mind when He presented Adam with Eve. He told them to cling to one another in the spirit of unity, and to be fruitful and multiply. He made it very simple, but sin turned it into something complicated. God never wanted this for a married couple, and if we want to partner successfully, we must heed His warnings and get back on track with the expectations of His Will.

The wrong person

Romans 8:29(NLT) says, “For God knew his people in advance, and he chose them to become like his Son, so that his Son would be the firstborn among many brothers and sisters.” Our Heavenly Father is mindful of each of us. He knows everything there is to know about us, and He has a plan for our lives. Even before we were formed in our mother’s womb, God chose the exact time and place of our births. There’s nothing random about us, and He wants us to understand this.

God always wants what is best for us, and God’s Will is always the best. His Will is that we become in every way like His first and only begotten Son, Jesus Christ. We are to spend our lives learning to love, give, and share like Christ, but we have an enemy that will stop at nothing to prevent us from doing this. It’s one of the reasons we must not ignore the warnings in God’s Word about guarding our hearts. He tells us in Proverbs 4:23(NLT), “Guard your heart above all else, for it determines the course of your life.” Many of us haven’t approached our relationships with this level of diligence. We’ve allowed the wrong person into our hearts, and it has been the downfall of many.

Be clear that the devil knows your type. Getting you to fall deeply in love with someone sent by him is a very old trick of his. We should by no means be afraid of this, but God has warned us to be exceedingly careful. He tells us in 1Peter 5:8(NLT), “Stay alert! Watch out for your great enemy, the devil. He prowls around like a roaring lion, looking for someone to devour.” Heavenly Father wouldn’t warn us about the forces of darkness if they were not a danger. We are empowered through Christ to resist these attempts against us. We must be fully committed to lean on Heavenly Father for wisdom and discernment regarding our significant relationships, and if you haven’t heard from the Lord that this person is sent from Him, hit pause.

Don’t get lost in fairy tales

It’s a fairy tale to expect things to work out well when we fail to acknowledge God’s Word and Will. Faith is required to have lasting and meaningful relationships, especially in our day and time, and faith comes from hearing God’s truth. We can’t have a fairy tale mentality about what it takes to cross paths with the person that God has ordained to walk with us through life, and we can’t be lost in a fairy tale about what it will take to maintain unity and peace with this person.

We can’t build relationships on the world and its fantasies, and God has warned us not to attempt to do this. He tells us in Proverbs 4:25-27(NLT), “25 Look straight ahead, and fix your eyes on what lies before you. 26 Mark out a straight path for your feet; stay on the safe path. 27 Don’t get sidetracked; keep your feet from following evil.” Romance can be a beautiful thing, but it was never intended to be a fairy tale. It’s given to us to treasure the person that God sends.

1Corinthians 3:11(ESV) tells us, “For no one can lay a foundation other than that which is laid, which is Jesus Christ.” God warns us to keep the ways of Christ and never try to build on a foundation that wasn’t laid by Christ. He tells us in Matthew 7:26-27(NLT), “26 But anyone who hears my teaching and doesn’t obey it is foolish, like a person who builds a house on sand. 27 When the rains and floods come and the winds beat against that house, it will collapse with a mighty crash.” Heed God’s warnings that protect your relationship with Him and your standing in Christ. Let God take care of your quest for marriage, and you take care of worshipping Him in truth, preserving yourself in holiness, and applying His Word to every aspect of your life.■

Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

English Standard Version (ESV)
The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. ESV® Text Edition: 2016. Copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers.

“Don’t Ignore the Warnings”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2024. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

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In the Blink of An Eye

July 8, 2024

Encouragement and Inspiration

Ephesians 3:20(NLT)
“Now all glory to God, who is able, through his mighty power at work within us, to accomplish infinitely more than we might ask or think.”

Jesus Christ is the answer! We see this on plaques, signs, and t-shirts. We’ve heard it preached and taught for years, but the question boils down to whether we believe this amazing truth. Jesus Christ is the answer for every condition, circumstance, dilemma, and problem. He tells us in John 14:6 that he is the way, the truth, and the life. In this plain yet powerful verse, Jesus Christ lays out a fundamental strategy for successful living. He tells us that if we want to know how to live a life of abundance, peace, and joy, we must look to his example. He’s the way forward in anything we could possibly attempt to do. It’s a shame that when it comes to finding the right person to walk with us through life, we don’t cling to John 14:6 to lead us to the victory we desire.

Some of us think to ourselves, “I’ve been asking God to bless me with a husband for a long while now, and I don’t think I’m any closer to the blessing.” We may imagine all kinds of reasons why we haven’t yet crossed paths with our future husbands. Many think that it is because God is not willing to bless them or that He’s withholding the blessing of marriage. Nothing could be further from the truth. God desires to see us blessed in marriage more than we desire it for ourselves. He wants us to be our most happy and blessed self, so we should never believe that God isn’t willing to bless us in this very important area of our lives.

Recognize that God can move on our behalf in less time than a blink of an eye. He specializes in the impossible, and He goes exceedingly abundantly above anything we can ask or think. We must also realize that understanding God’s power requires us to understand the laws He has created to govern His power. God is a God of order. He will never violate His Word, and as His children, He expects us to recognize that we shouldn’t violate it either. God requires us to step into alignment and harmony with His Word, and to do this, we must be diligent to study His Word more so that we can go higher in Christ.

Jesus Christ is the door to positioning ourselves with the work that God is doing in us and with the Will of our powerful Heavenly Father. The answer to any of our desires or dilemmas in life will always come back to our Lord and Savior. The quicker we realize this, the quicker we’ll help posture ourselves to please God and receive the desires of our hearts.

If we ask God to bless us in a certain area, and we haven’t seen any movement whatsoever, then we have no other choice than to look at our individual commitment to increase in the Spirit and decrease in the flesh. Jesus Christ said in Luke 12:48(NLT), “When someone has been given much, much will be required in return; and when someone has been entrusted with much, even more will be required.” We’re asking God to expand our lives by increasing our territory with the addition of another very important life. We’re telling Heavenly Father that we are ready to take on the responsibility of another’s heart, and that we will be diligent to help that person grow in Christ. How can we part our lips to say it when there’s no evidence it’s true? We must face the reality that we can’t help another to grow in Christ if we’re not willing to do it continually for ourselves.

Deuteronomy 11:22(NLT), God told His people living during Old Testament times, “Be careful to obey all these commands I am giving you. Show love to the Lord your God by walking in His ways and holding tightly to Him.” Our loving Heavenly Father makes His word so very plain and easy to understand. And through His Word, He expects us to understand that He is righteous, and He has made us righteous in Christ, so that we can meet His requirements. We must walk in His ways according to the example of Christ and become more firmly rooted in the Lord Jesus with each passing day. This is what makes the difference in our lives, and it’s what transforms our status from single to married in the blink of an eye.■

Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

“In the Blink of An Eye”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2024. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

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