Find A Christian Man

Tag: Christian Women Organization

  • I Want All of You, Forever

    I Want All of You, Forever

    Romantic movies have had a big impact on the way many of us view relationships between men and women. We are captivated by the lengths the leading male character will go to in order to show and prove his love for the female lead. Most of us long for this kind of romance with the person we hope to marry. In one of the romantic movies I watched recently, the man said something along the lines of, “I know it isn’t going to be easy. Sometimes it will be really hard, and we’ll have to work at this every day, but I want to do this more than I’ve ever wanted anything in my life. I want you. I want all of you, forever. I want it to be you and me.” The actor said this with such emotion and depth that your heart just melted. You couldn’t help but ask yourself, “What would I do if someone said that to me and actually meant it?”

    We want so desperately for another human being to show us this kind of love, but the truth is that this is exactly how Jesus Christ feels about us. He said in John 15:13(KJV), “Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends.” He loves us so intensely that nothing on earth compares and nothing can ever separate us from His love, for all eternity. God has given us the creativity and imaginations to produce such things as romance novels and movies. They help us to grow in our appreciation and gratitude for the level of love that He has for us all.

    Falling in love gives us ooey gooey feelings of sweetness, but as yummy as it is, it doesn’t really capture the essence of the love of Christ. Jesus commands us to love each other with his kind of love, because his brand of love is everlasting. His brand of love will cause us to put the welfare of others before our own. Jesus Christ invites us to try his kind of love on for size so we can see that it fits. He wants us to get excited about it, because if we’ve accepted him in our hearts, we carry his brand of love with us everywhere we go. We can love just the way he loves.

    Ephesians 5:2(NLT) tells us to, “Live a life filled with love, following the example of Christ. He loved us and offered himself as a sacrifice for us, a pleasing aroma to God.” Movies aren’t real, but the love of God in Christ is more real than anything that exists. It is because of this love that you and I are living today. We can enjoy a romantic movie and be entertained and sometimes enriched by them. But we can only experience this enrichment because our Lord and Master set the precedent. We recognize intense love in a movie, because the real life and technicolor truth of the love of Jesus Christ saved us and rescued us from darkness.

    Typically, when people make the choice to “fall-in” love, they are forming a bond. Before they even make a lasting commitment, they give their hearts to one another. They don’t recognize that people can fall out of love as quickly and effortlessly as they fall in love. The problem with a ‘falling-in-and-out’ love is that it comes in limited supply. It doesn’t last. A person hopes that the memory of what they shared in the beginning of the relationship is enough to under-gird the storms that come a bit later. The divorce rate suggests this doesn’t happen all the time.

    Romantic love is subject to our own interpretation. It’s defined differently for each person, and it is based on how we choose to respond to someone and how they choose to respond to us. The love of Christ isn’t dependent on give and take. It isn’t based on conditions and circumstances. When Christ dwells in our hearts, we become a part of him. Colossians 3:3(NLT) tells us, “For you died to this life, and your real life is hidden with Christ in God.” So then, the love of God in Christ is not just how we respond to others, the love of God in Christ is who we are. Through Christ, we become the embodiment of God’s love. His love helps us to discern and gives us the wisdom to look to Him for what is best for our lives.

    All of us have enjoyed a good romance novel or movie from time to time. I personally like them very much, but it’s really important that we know the difference between infatuation and the kind of love that holds a relationship together for a lifetime. Colossians 2:10 affirms that we are complete through our union with Christ, who is the head over every ruler, power, and authority that exists. Only the love of Christ can make us complete, and you and I must be grounded in his love. God tells us in Colossians 2:7(NLT) to, “Let your roots grow down into him, and let your lives be built on him. Then your faith will grow strong in the truth you were taught, and you will overflow with thankfulness.” At the very core of our beings, we must be rooted in Christ. When we are, we will give the kind of love that honors God through Christ, and we can be confident that it will be the kind of love we receive. ■

    Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

    “I Want All of You, Forever”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2022. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

  • Baby Steps Will Yield Big Results

    Baby Steps Will Yield Big Results

    There was a time in my life when I celebrated the blessing of a new year with a long list of resolutions. Why did I put all that pressure on myself? I missed so much of the joy of newness by overwhelming my efforts with unreasonable expectations. Things like getting back into the gym, traveling more, and learning a new language were just a few things on my list. They were admirable goals and aspirations, but by the end of the year, many of my resolutions had not materialized in the way I expected. This felt like failure to me, and that’s not a helpful outlook. The truth will always come to us when we demonstrate that we are ready to hear it. So, after years of doing resolutions with minimal results, I sat down with pen and paper in hand, and prepared to ask myself some brutally honest questions. I didn’t have all the answers, but I knew they would come. When they did, it hit me like a ton of bricks. Baby steps was the way to go, and I needed to pray and ask the Father for guidance about which ones to take.

    One of my friends shared her New Year’s Resolutions List with me and preparing to meet her future husband was in the number one spot. I could be wrong, but I don’t think baby steps are anywhere on her radar. She wants to take a deep dive plunge, and my hunch is that many single women are right there with her. They are looking to meet their future husbands, but like my friend, they probably haven’t given a whole lot of thought to exactly what it will take to make this a reality. Our approach to resolutions is typically about what we can do externally. We rarely think about the mental, emotional, and most importantly, the spiritual practices required for change. There’s an old saying that you can’t get different results by doing the same things you’ve always done. No doubt most of us have heard this statement, but God says it best. He tells us in Ephesians 4:23(NIV), “be made new in the attitude of your minds.”

    When it comes to preparing for newness of any kind, our minds are key. Before there can be a change in our hearts, there must be a change in our minds. We must always remember this because everyone that we encounter will either respond or not respond to us based on what’s in our hearts. In other words, if we haven’t changed the way we think, then we haven’t changed what’s operating in our hearts. Many women may have already crossed the path of their future husbands, but because the woman’s heart hasn’t changed, he does not respond to her in the way that he could. So, we have to address the condition of our hearts, and we need to do it through God’s guidance and direction.

    In truth, the first place to prepare to receive a blessing from the Lord begins in our hearts. This is where resolutions take root. It’s where our blessings begin their journey to manifestation. Baby steps are the ones we take to find our best course of action to build our faith, so that our confessed desires can become a reality. These steps begin within, they start with our willingness to be guided by the Spirit.

    Jesus Christ said in John 16:13(NLT), “When the Spirit of truth comes, he will guide you into all truth. He will not speak on his own but will tell you what he has heard. He will tell you about the future.” The Holy Spirit lives inside every born-again believer, and his occupation is to comfort, guide, and teach us the truth. He is going to give us information that is from Jesus Christ, and this information is beneficial for the purpose for which we were created. When it comes to your desires, hypothetically, it is possible that you wanted to be a Rocket Scientist. You may have held this desire throughout your youth, but after you finished nursing school, as an adult, you realized that being a Rocket Scientist was not your destiny. God’s Will for your life was to become a nurse, so that you could help those He ordained you to minister to. This is His call upon your life being fulfilled. As admirable as the profession maybe, you were led by the Spirit to become a nurse, not a Rocket Scientist. The Spirit led you according to the Will of God for your life, and you humbled yourself to be led. Resolution should work the very same way.

    Resolutions represent ambitions and aspirations that are not yet realized. They are unrealized because we have surmised that they will require a more focused and consistent effort to transform from an idea to a reality. They will require more from us, Jesus Christ tells us this in Luke 12:48, where he said, “When someone has been given much, much will be required in return; and when someone has been entrusted with much, even more will be required.” So, if we’re asking more of life, we should also be asking ourselves how to prepare for it, because it will require more from us. We will have to give and do more than we have in the past, and we must get our minds and hearts on board.

    Some of us try to make our minds do things they are not designed to do. We try to make them change and expand without the spiritual mechanisms God designed to accomplish this. Romans 10:17 tells us that faith comes from hearing and perceiving the Word of God. A spiritual transaction occurs when we hear God’s Word and believe it. Our minds change and our hearts swell. This is the way to spiritually make room for newness, and there is no other way to increase our faith.

    Jesus Christ told us in Matthew 6:8 that God knows what we need before we ask for it. He knew our need before we even had a hint that we would desire it. Likewise, God knows our resolutions and the desires of our hearts, and He is calling us to attention. We are not to place all our focus on the resolution. Instead, our focus must be on God alone. He will guide you to the Word you need to hear to build your faith, so that you have great success.

    There’s spiritual work that God has called us to. Reading our Bibles, praying and meditating, and talking often to Heavenly Father are essential to staying spiritually strong so we can be and do what He’s called us to become and get done. Our Lord and Savior tells us in Luke 16:10(MSG), “If you’re honest in small things, you’ll be honest in big things; If you’re a crook in small things, you’ll be a crook in big things. If you’re not honest in small jobs, who will put you in charge of the store?” From the words of Jesus Christ, we can confidently know that making baby steps can be a successful approach to sharpen our spiritual strength and increase our relationship with God.

    Heavenly Father said in Isaiah 43:18-19(NLT), “But forget all that—it is nothing compared to what I am going to do. For I am about to do something new. See, I have already begun! Do you not see it? I will make a pathway through the wilderness. I will create rivers in the dry wasteland.” You are not in this thing alone. God is with you all the way. You don’t have to take big steps to achieve big results. God takes care of the big steps. So, this year, resolve to be as humble before Heavenly Father as you possibly can. Submit to Him, and if you follow wherever the Spirit leads, there’s no pressure and you will not be disappointed. ■

    Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

    “Baby Steps Will Yield Big Results”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2022. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

  • Consistent and Unwavering

    Consistent and Unwavering

    I don’t know if any of you have ever had a conversation with someone that is truly disappointed with life, but I have. I know a person that has lost everything in life that was important. This woman became jobless, then homeless and car-less, then her children were taken away. As a single mom, she struggled to hold it together for as long as she could, but her every turn was met with more trouble, and without a firm foundation of faith, she gave up. It never occurred to her that God has a plan for her life. She wrongly believed that He was punishing her for a reason she couldn’t understand. Her mind had become so entrenched in this negative way of believing, that she would not even attempt to trust God. Instead, she was bitter and grew comfortable with a mind and heart of doubt.

    Jesus Christ said of himself in Revelations 3:8 that when he opens a door for us, no one can close it. By the same working of his mighty power, we must also understand that the door he closes, no one can open. The door he has closed for us was the one to darkness, fear, and doubt. We must reconcile in our minds and hearts that if Christ has closed it, and he has, we have no business trying to open it. If we do, we will not like what we find.

    In the preceding verse, Revelations 3:7, our Lord and Master tells us that he is the One that is holy and true. He’s the perfect One, our high priest that makes intercession for us before the Father’s throne. Jesus Christ tells us that he holds the key of David. This key reveals his sovereignty as a King of a Kingdom that has no end. He is the ruler of the universe, and ultimately every knee will bow before him. Hebrews 7:26(NLT) tells us, “He is the kind of high priest we need because he is holy and blameless, unstained by sin. He has been set apart from sinners and has been given the highest place of honor in heaven.”

    Our Lord is holy and set apart. He deserves glory and honor. He accomplished for us what we could not accomplish for ourselves, and he is able to do in us what no other can. He simply asks that we trust him, that we surrender our doubt, fear, and worry, and give all our burdens to him. He tells us in Matthew 11:29(NLT), “Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls.” This is who our loving Savior is. Compassion and caring are his nature. To meet him at this humble place of surrender, our faith is required.

    When our desires and the blessings we expect in life are delayed or destroyed, some people will wall themselves off from having faith in Jesus Christ. This is extremely detrimental. It keeps our faith stagnant; it can plant seeds of arrogance in our hearts, and it conveys that we have a sense of entitlement rather than gratitude. Trouble comes from the devil, but it doesn’t last always. Trouble can be incredibly uncomfortable, but it is also a sign that promotion is near. It is an indicator that we must grow spiritually to achieve the level of maturity that God is calling us to. So, the question isn’t so much about how long trouble will last. The question that we should be asking is how we can get to the door that Jesus Christ has opened for us.

    Human beings are not that complicated, and life can be very simple when we put it in the context of God’s Word. There are only two lanes we can travel in life, one inside the Will of God and the other, outside of it. Jesus Christ said in Mark 3:35(NLT) “Anyone who does God’s will is my brother and sister and mother.” Furthermore, God tell us in Romans 12:2 that we must not be conformed to the culture and traditions of this world, but instead we are to be transformed by changing the way we think, then we will prove God’s Will. Often in life, our problems are on repeat because we haven’t lined up our thinking to the mind of Christ, so we lack the faith to prove God’s perfect Will. Our thinking patterns need to be changed, but we’re too stubborn to do it. We won’t ask God what we need to change, we won’t listen to His answer, and some of us have no intention of actually changing our ways.

    God is in the blessing business. 2Chronicles 16:9 says that His eyes search to and fro throughout the whole earth. He is looking for people who have hearts that are committed to Him, because this is the kind of heart that allows the strength of His power to do the miraculous. We don’t have to be perfect, but we must be consistent in our humility towards God, and we must have a desire to grow in an unwavering faith in Him. It’s not about all the things we want. It’s about trusting in God’s goodness and having confidence that He cannot fail. We know that the devil will throw many darts, but we are more than conquerors through Jesus Christ, and God has well equipped us to handle any trick or plot. It is not nearly as complicated as we make it. When we humble ourselves in faith and thankfulness, we’ll see that the door has already been opened for us by Christ, and all we have to do is walk through it.■

    Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

    “Consistent and Unwavering” , written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2022. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

  • Do You Ever Wonder?

    Do You Ever Wonder?

    Do you ever wonder if the path you’re on is just not getting you where you want to go? Does it seem like you’re traveling rocky terrain and you can’t seem to build the type of momentum you expected? Many single believers feel this way about relationships and finding the right person. They’re wondering why it seems so challenging to meet someone who’s compatible and actually believes marriage is one of life’s treasures. Every day you wake up hoping it will be different from all the rest, and that you’ll meet the person that starts a new chapter for you. After a while, you start to wonder if things will ever go your way. There are folks that have gotten tired of waiting. They’ve stepped outside of Godliness and are doing whatever they want. You might be wondering if that’s a path you should take.

    The first question you might consider asking yourself is “How important is it to me to wait on God?” Is this a requirement for a follower of Christ? Does God require those that are committed to Him to wait for the fulfillment of His promises? So many people have chosen not to do so. Especially in these times, more and more people are abandoning the spiritual discipline of waiting on God. Make no mistake, spiritual warfare is real, and the devil has used the desire for marriage to separate many singles from their relationship with God, and therefore, they are separated from the blessings He wants to give them.

    This spiritual war began way before Adam and Eve were created. It began when satan, once a beautiful cherub, decided to rebel against Heavenly Father’s Will. The Lord said of satan in Ezekiel 28:12-15(NKJV), “You were the seal of perfection, Full of wisdom and perfect in beauty. You were in Eden, the garden of God; every precious stone was your covering: the sardius, topaz, and diamond, Beryl, onyx, and jasper, Sapphire, turquoise, and emerald with gold. The workmanship of your timbrels and pipes was prepared for you on the day you were created. “You were the anointed cherub who covers; I established you; You were on the holy mountain of God; You walked back and forth in the midst of fiery stones. You were perfect in your ways from the day you were created, till iniquity was found in you.”

    Isaiah 14:12 tells us that God cut satan down to the ground because he destroyed the nations of the world and tried to exalt his throne above God’s stars. Isaiah 14:14 tells us that satan was full of arrogance and wanted to be like the Most High, so he was thrown out of heaven. The realm that satan oversees is utter destruction and darkness; he is trying to put us in that same bondage so that we will not fulfill the destiny in Christ that God has ordained for our lives. It is the battle of good versus evil, light versus darkness, faith versus fear, and God versus satan. The choice of which side we are going to be on is ever before us.

    Psalm 27:14(NLT) says, “Wait patiently for the LORD. Be brave and courageous. Yes, wait patiently for the LORD.” The reason that we can be brave and courageous in the wait is because the Lord does not disappoint. The Lord doesn’t fail. He is faithful to keep His promises and we can lean upon Him with absolute confidence. After a certain amount of time has gone by, we might be tricked into thinking that the Lord isn’t going to answer our prayers. We might think He’s forgotten about our need, and that He’s unhappy with us. Nothing could be further from the truth. God is working both in us and in the person that will walk with us through life.

    Think about where you are and all the emotional ups and downs you’ve gone through during the process of waiting. You’ve had doubts, you’ve made mistakes, and you may have resented the time it is taking. You might think to yourself, “I’ve already been patiently waiting on the Lord, and nothing is happening.” Life does not begin with marriage, nor should the fulfillment of it be dependent on marriage. Our life is in Jesus Christ! Heavenly Father doesn’t punish us for not coming to grips with this reality, but He absolutely expects that we will learn it so we can walk by faith.

    God has called us to His purpose, and there is much we are called to do. Jesus Christ said in Luke 6:44 that a tree is known by the fruit it bears, and we will never escape this truth. We are in the fruit producing business, and it is a spiritual trade we must master before we think about marriage. Most of us spend so little time on Kingdom business. We’re on social media, our phones, at work or doing a million other things. Some of us spend 90 -95% of our time pursuing our own agendas, and then we get upset when God doesn’t reward our lack of attention to His purpose.

    Significant relationships are probably one of the most rewarding ventures in life, but they are also very challenging. Spiritual maturity is a must to sustain them. And the truth is that if we have time to complain about waiting, we’re not busy enough with Kingdom pursuits. Each night, we should be so tired from running our races for Jesus that all we think about is praying and going to sleep. God cannot be an afterthought, and He will teach us to prioritize so that this is never the case in our lives.

    2Peter 3:9(NLT) tells us, “The Lord isn’t really being slow about his promise, as some people think. No, he is being patient for your sake. He does not want anyone to be destroyed, but wants everyone to repent.” God’s timing is impeccable. It is so on point that it would blow our minds to know just how truly perfect His timing is. He doesn’t make mistakes, and He is not withholding our blessings. He is being patient for our sakes. He’s giving us time to sharpen our level of spiritual maturity so that we can handle the sometimes rocky terrain of marriage.

    God doesn’t want us destroying one of His treasures, and He doesn’t want anyone harming us either. He doesn’t want us hurting someone and impeding their spiritual journey in Christ because we haven’t learned to be kind, compassionate, and unselfish. He doesn’t want anyone’s heart to be crushed by another person’s habit of carrying resentment, acting out in anger, and doubting His goodness. Heavenly Father is going to protect His treasures even when they don’t realize that this is what He’s doing. So, if you are wondering if you’ll have to wait longer, you might. But know that if you continue to do what He’s called you to do, and grow in Christ, He will answer your prayers and His timing will be perfect.■

    Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

    “Do You Ever Wonder?”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2022. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

  • When You Least Expect It

    When You Least Expect It

    One sunny summer day, my sisters’ and I had spent the afternoon shopping. Our hands were filled with bags as we were getting in our car. My oldest sister was driving and had just gotten behind the wheel. My middle sister, the most notable shopaholic among us, was finagling bags to try and open the passenger-side door. Out of nowhere, a complete stranger approached her. He offered to help my sister, and with her permission, he opened the door, and then closed it after she was seated. Our mouths were agape as we watched him very gentlemanly assist her, and then wish us all a good afternoon. We were like, “What just happened?” Although this kindness occurred quite a number of years ago, the impact of it strikes me even today.

    Whenever I mention this occurrence to others, particularly women, the comments range from, “You’ll never see that happening today…” to “Hope your bags were intact.” Isn’t it something that in the face of such a simple and beautiful act of kindness, many of us suspect the worse? It’s sad, because as daughters of our Heavenly Father, it is His desire that such kindnesses are heaped on us every day of our lives. Many of us have gone through such heartbreak and disrespect from prior relationships that we no longer expect this kind of chivalry from a man, and some of us have never experienced it to any significant degree.

    And of course, there are some that ask if we ever saw him again. We didn’t, but it was enough to know that such a man exists, and he’s not the only one of his kind. I’m reminded of the record in the Old Testament, when Elijah complained to God that there were so few within His people, the children of Israel, that were faithful to God’s covenant. Elijah was in deep despair over their sinful behavior and betrayal. He knew the tremendous blessings that God had given them, and they repaid God’s kindness and grace with arrogance and sin. Elijah was weary of their shenanigans, and he tried to use their disobedience as an excuse to throw his hands up and retreat. He didn’t want to be bothered with them anymore and thought they were a useless cause. Many of God’s people had forsaken Him, and Elijah could hardly stomach seeing them ruin and run down things that they should have held sacred in their hearts and minds.

    Elijah complained to God in 1Kings 19:14(NLT), “I have zealously served the LORD God Almighty. But the people of Israel have broken their covenant with you, torn down your altars, and killed every one of your prophets. I am the only one left, and now they are trying to kill me, too.”  Many of us can relate somewhat to how Elijah felt. If you’ve been traveling in the ‘single’s lane’ a while, it can feel very much like no one truly understands what you’re about. They can’t match your capacity to love and don’t have the depth to walk with you through life. You might feel like Elijah, that the bottom of the barrow is what’s left, and there’s no sea of which a treasure can be found.

    God told Elijah in 1Kings 19:18 that He had preserved 7,000 of His people that had not bowed to the idol, baal, or served him. Elijah made an incorrect assumption that underestimated God’s power, intelligence, and provision. Many single believers have done the same thing. God doesn’t punish us when we think this way, He helps us, but will we allow ourselves to be helped? 2Chronicles 16:9(NLT) says, “The eyes of the LORD search the whole earth in order to strengthen those whose hearts are fully committed to him.” He’s searching the entire earth, looking for a certain characteristic in our hearts, and it is the humility to trust His Word and become fully committed to our relationships with Him. When we do this, we will no longer doubt His willingness or ability to bless us.

    When we allow ourselves to believe that God has not provided for us in the way His Word says He has, we not only run the risk of not pleasing God, but we are injuring our faith. We stop it from performing because it isn’t mixed with our believing. The most faithful in God are often hidden, like the gentleman who came out of nowhere to inspire our faith and to be a conduit of God’s love. God knows those that belong to Him, and He knows exactly where they are. He sees what we cannot see, and we should never underestimate His power, love, and provision. When our faith is firmly anchored in His goodness, God will strengthen our hearts. Never allow negativity to cause you to underestimate what God can and will do for your life. He will exceed your expectations, and a beautiful blessing might occur when you least expect it.■

    Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

    “When You Least Expect It”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2022. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

  • Who Do You Belong To?

    Who Do You Belong To?

    A wonderful sister in Christ had her first date with someone that she’s known for a while, but he was never really on her radar. The date went rather well, and she felt really good about things. A few days after their date, she wondered whether it was a good idea for her to reach out and make contact, because she hadn’t heard anything from him since the date. When she asked for my opinion, I in turn asked her one question, “Who do you belong to?” She knew instantly what I meant. She affirmed it with a nod and replied “God!” My question had absolutely nothing to do with arrogance, and it has everything to do with faith. If you’ve been praying for God to bless you with your destiny partner, you must have confidence that when he meets you, he will know who you are.

    Dating is one of the areas in life where a person can think they are walking by faith, but fear is the thing that motivates a lot of their actions. It is important for us to understand that faith does not respond to a whim. It’s not wishy washy, or ambiguous. You either have faith in the Lord Jesus Christ or you don’t. It is impossible to operate by both faith and fear. We can’t serve two masters. We have to chose which one we’re going to stand on.

    It is very common in a situation like my friend experienced for the woman to feel as though she might have said or done something to offend, or that perhaps the man was left with the impression she wasn’t interested. She might think, “Maybe I should give things a nudge.” The thoughtful creatures that many women are, we immediately go into ‘fix it’ mode. This isn’t going to be helpful towards your confidence or his.

    What will be helpful is to take a closer examination of how faith operates. Mark 9 gives us the record of a Father that was desperately seeking help for his son. The boy was possessed by a demon, and the father had gone to some of the disciples to cast the demon out of the boy. They were not able to do it. A crowd had gathered around the disciples because of the spectacle of this father and son. Jesus approached them and asked what was happening. The boy’s father spoke up and explained the situation. He then said to Jesus in Mark 9:22(NKJV), “But if You can do anything, have compassion on us and help us.”

    “IF” is not strong enough to connect and move faith to manifest results, because “IF” does not equal the truth. 2Corinthians 1:20(NLT) says, “For all of God’s promises have been fulfilled in Christ with a resounding “Yes!” This is the mindset of a fully persuaded believer; it’s the mindset that our powerful Lord deserves. Jesus Christ didn’t abandon the boy’s father and leave him with his “IF”, he helped him to get his mind right. Jesus said to him in Mark 9:23(NKJV), “If you can believe, all things are possible to him who believes.” The father then said, “Lord I believe, but I may need some help. Please help my unbelief.” Jesus then healed the boy and casted out the evil spirit.

    The right man for you is never an “IF”. He’s a resounding “Yes!” Do you believe this? Amos 3:3(NIV) is the question that sets the stage for razor sharp wisdom. It says, “Do two walk together unless they have agreed to do so?” No person can make or force an individual to give something they are not willing to give. As women, we must come into agreement with God’s order, purpose, and Will. We cannot second guess His staggering genius and intellect. He created men and women to respond to each other in a certain way, and He made sure that a man will recognize his spouse and will not stop until he has made this queen his wife. This is what all real men do.

    You are not a defective product that needs repair, and neither is your future spouse. Want what God has for you and nothing less. Time expended on the wrong one is time better spent sharpening your faith for the right one. Have faith in God. He cannot fail and He never disappoints. ■

    Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

    Scripture taken from the New King James Version. Copyright © 1982 by Thomas Nelson, Inc. Used by permission. All rights reserved.

    THE HOLY BIBLE, NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION®, NIV® Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc.™ Used by permission. All rights reserved worldwide.

     “Who Do You Belong To?” written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2021. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

  • The Right King for You

    The Right King for You

    God’s Word tells us in 1Corinthians 14:33 that He is a God of order. The definition of this word ‘order’ points us in the direction of other words we know so well, like organization, arrangement, and structure. Because of God’s Word, we can now see clearly that everything He does is systematic and efficient. He arranges things in such a way that He never has to do a do-over, a back-track, or a take-back. This information is so crucial because it helps to provide the framework for how we approach God in prayer, particularly if we’re praying to cross paths with Mr. Right. If you’ve been praying about your desire to be married for quite some time, the framework for understanding the orderly way that God does things may help you considerably.

    1Samuel 16 gives us just the perspective we need. It tells us the communication between God and His prophet, Samuel. It took place during the reign of King Saul, who was the first king of the children of Israel. Saul had all the trappings. He was handsome as all get-out, virile and strong, and the people loved him because in their minds, he fit the bill for how a king should look and act. But Saul only looked the part. He wasn’t a good fit. Time and time again, God gave him opportunities to straighten up his act and be obedient, but his arrogance got in the way. Saul’s heart was far from God, and he was determined to do things his own way.

    God told his prophet, Samuel, that Saul had to go, and Samuel was very disappointed about this. He loved Saul and was upset that God had chosen someone else to be king. If we’re being honest, many of us have been in Samuel’s shoes. We took it upon ourselves to find ourselves a king, and although he looked the part, he was not ready for the responsibility and privilege of caring for our hearts because he didn’t honor God. He was not the one. And rather than repenting for not consulting and listening to Heavenly Father in our decision making, some of us prayed to God to make this misplaced-king act right, or we asked God to change his heart.

    Heavenly Father will never overstep someone’s free-will. This is something we must know so that we do not pray for things that are outside of God’s Will and Word. We can pray until the cows come home, but God will not change someone’s heart towards us. This is made abundantly clear in the record of King Saul. God loved Saul more than anyone, including Samuel, but Heavenly Father would not change Saul’s heart. God would not make him act right, because again, doing something like this would violate His laws, and God will never overstep His Word. Instead, Heavenly Father chose someone to be king that had a heart that was tender towards Him. It was David, a ruddy-faced boy who loved shepherding and being out in nature. Samuel, the prophet, thought God was going to choose one of David’s brothers, because again Samuel was impressed with appearance and height. The Father told him in 1Samuel 16:7(NLT), “Don’t judge by his appearance or height, for I have rejected him. The LORD doesn’t see things the way you see them. People judge by outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart.”

    As single women, we have to ask ourselves if we’re searching for someone that looks the part, or do we want the king that God has chosen for us? Left to our own devices, many of us have chosen someone who looks the part but has a heart that is far from God. This often leads to disaster. Some of us do this because we don’t believe God will present us with someone that is all we need them to be. In reality, the scriptures are full of accounts where God does the exceedingly abundantly and exceeds expectations. He has many men that are talented, courageous, intelligent, attractive, and the favor of God is upon them. There is no shortage of good men, but there is in fact a shortage of women that are willing to be patient and obedient as God teaches them to align with His purpose and order.

    Humility and honor before God means that we must get rid of our resistance to change. God desires us to be happy and to have a life that is fulfilling and meaningful, but the more than abundant life can only be lived through Jesus Christ. He is the way to it. So, we must change the way we’ve done things in the past. We must be guided by the Spirit of Christ on the journey to acquiring what we want most in life, because this is God’s order. Psalm 37:23(NLT) says, “The LORD directs the steps of the godly. He delights in every detail of their lives.” Let the Lord delight in the details of your life by submitting your quest for marriage to Him and trusting that He will present the right king for you.■

    Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

     “The Right King for You”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2021. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

  • You May Want It but It’s Not Good for You

    You May Want It but It’s Not Good for You

    God designed the human body to naturally have certain desires and cravings. We all know what these feel like. Whether it’s craving food, power, fame, money, a favorite drink or a particular person, sometimes we crave things so strongly that we will do just about anything to acquire them. Our Lord and Savior has given us an approach to handle these cravings, so they don’t get out of control. In Matthew 26:41(NLT), he tells us, “Keep watch and pray, so that you will not give in to temptation. For the spirit is willing, but the body is weak!” This is very important information for us to know, because the enemy tested Jesus Christ, and he uses our cravings to test us. If we’re expecting God to bless us with the desires of our hearts, our commitment to stand guard and pray must be proven.

    Through the Apostle Paul, God tells us in Galatians 5:16(NLT), “So I say, let the Holy Spirit guide your lives. Then you won’t be doing what your sinful nature craves.” This is a very practical verse, and God is telling us exactly what we must do in our lives. The Holy Spirit is the one to take the lead. He is to lead, and we are to follow. This is God’s divine plan, and it will keep us from giving in to temptation, so we won’t do what our sinful nature craves. Here, we have a distinction of two natures, and one of them is the part of us that craves sinful things that go against God’s plan. It is our sinful nature, and Romans 8:7 tells us that this sinful nature is always hostile to God. It is corrupt through and through.

    The other nature that Galatians 5:16 tells us about is the spiritual nature. It is the nature of our ‘spirit man’ that was recreated through our new birth experience. This is the transformation that took place when we accepted Jesus Christ as our Lord and Savior. 2Corinthians 5:17(NLT) tells us, “This means that anyone who belongs to Christ has become a new person. The old life is gone; a new life has begun!” Our spirit man was dead to God before we accepted Christ, but after we were saved, our spirit man became alive through Jesus Christ, giving us new life!

    God’s people living in Old Testament times did not have the new birth experience. They had to offer sacrifices continually from the blood of animals to cover their sins, because Jesus Christ had not yet come to the earth and given his life as a sacrifice. It is different for those of us living after the resurrection of Jesus Christ. We live through him, and because we do, we can stand strong through prayer and faith, and resist temptation that comes by way of plots and tricks from the enemy.

    For many of us, if we’re being honest, even though we have the spiritual strength through Jesus Christ to resist temptation, we don’t. We have longings and cravings for certain things, and when we’re in relationships, some of us allow feelings and emotions to take over. Then we find ourselves in situations that are less than Godly. The body wants what it wants, but what it wants isn’t always good for our lives, and it’s not going to help lead us to the place where God wants us to be. So, if your mind isn’t renewed to the Word of God, you might easily let your cravings and emotions call the shots. This isn’t pleasing to God, and we must pray fervently and frequently to grow in Christ and let our Master Jesus call the shots, not our emotions or cravings.

    Galatians 5:13(NLT) tells us, “For you have been called to live in freedom, my brothers and sisters. But don’t use your freedom to satisfy your sinful nature. Instead, use your freedom to serve one another in love.” We are free from a life of sin and strife through Jesus Christ! This freedom should be used to serve others in love, and the eyes of God are on us to see how we do this. Our commitment to honor God through loving and sharing, and being obedient to Him, demonstrates that we are serious about the commitment to honor our marriage vows and to be the spouse He desires us to be. We cannot say that we have faith in God to present us with a compatible mate, yet we don’t demonstrate the faith to turn from sin like He tells us we can. Let’s make sure we are praying to God for the spiritual strength to stand strong when confronted with temptation, so that nothing the enemy does will destroy the wonderful plan God has for our lives. ■

    Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

    “You May Want It but It’s Not Good for You” written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2021. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

  • Your Blessing is Linked to Your Gift

    Your Blessing is Linked to Your Gift

    1Peter 4:10 tells us that God has given each of us a unique spiritual gift to bless the body of Christ. This begs us to ask ourselves if we know what this gift is and if we are using it in the way God has purposed. He instructs us in 1Peter 4:10 to use our gifts to serve one another. As sisters in Christ that are praying to cross paths with our future spouses, God requires that we obey His Word. Our obedience will position us on the path that leads to His rewards, and He doesn’t want us to miss the treasure He wants to give us. As we seek God for guidance and direction in our desires to be married, we can be sure that the answer to our prayer is linked to our desire to use the gift God has given us.

    When it comes to certain aspects of life and what we want out of it, the ‘why’ is very important to our understanding. Why do we want to be married? What do we want out of marriage? Who do we want to marry and what are we doing to bring ourselves closer to what we want? These are very important questions that we must answer. We must answer them because there must be something within our minds and hearts that draws us closer to what we want and draws what we want closer to us. We can’t sit back with our hands on our laps and do nothing. James 2:26 tells us that faith without works is dead.

    We can’t perform any ol’ work we please and think that God will automatically bless it. If we have ears to hear, He will tell us what we ought to do, and He will tell us how to get it done. He tells us in His Word what He expects from us, and there is always a reason behind His expectations. He doesn’t keep it a secret.

    In 1Peter 4:11(NLT), He tells us, “Do you have the gift of speaking? Then speak as though God himself were speaking through you. Do you have the gift of helping others? Do it with all the strength and energy that God supplies. Then everything you do will bring glory to God through Jesus Christ. All glory and power to him forever and ever! Amen.” God is the Giver of good and perfect gifts, and when it comes to blessing the body of Christ, everyone has a gift they can employ for the increase of God’s Kingdom. In 1Peter 4:11, Heavenly Father tells us why using our gifts is so crucial to our relationship with Him and to the well-being of our lives. He instructs us to use our gifts in the most diligent way possible, because when our heart is to be of service in a way that honors God, we bring glory to Him through our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.

    Bringing glory to God is the greatest thing that any living thing or person can do. It is the key, and we must use it to unlock the treasures we desire. Glory is the highest praise, honor, adoration, and admiration that can be given. Anyone that is glorious by definition deserves glory. God deserves the highest level of glory that can be achieved. He deserves it every moment of every day for all of eternity. When a man came running towards Jesus and called him ‘Good Teacher”, Jesus asked him, “Why do you call me good? No one is good except the Father.” Our Father is good, and as His children, we must give Him the glory He is due.

    In 2Timothy 4:7, near the end of his life, the Apostle Paul declared, “I have fought a good fight, I have finished my course, I have kept the faith:” We should all be able to speak these words at the point of our transition. Heavenly Father has revealed a key to faith for us, and it has everything to do with the motivation of our hearts. We must desire to please God more than we desire to please any other person. His pleasure and delight must be our chief motivation and desire, and if it is, our actions will back it up. We will understand that He has laid a race before each of us, and not only this, He’s given us every skill, gift, and resource to run this race and finish it with authority and victory. Let’s get busy fulfilling our purpose in the Lord, because the energy and effort behind our obedience to His Will contains the faith to bring our greatest desires into fruition.■

    Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

    “Your Blessing Is Linked to Your Gift” written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2021. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

  • As We Go Our Separate Ways

    As We Go Our Separate Ways

    When you’re going through rough times in your marriage or relationship with your significant other, who’s the person you usually call for support? After praying to Heavenly Father, many of us would reach out to our BFFs for a shoulder to cry or lean on. It’s a friend that will always listen to us blubber through as we try to make sense of what is happening. It’s someone that offers spiritual encouragement, compassion and support, and not judgement. These are the women we count on, and we have established deeply rooted ties, some stronger than biological ones. But one of the things many of us struggle with is how to honor these friendships, especially while balancing them with the relationship needs of the significant man in our lives.

    It’s inevitable that there will be friends, some we’ve had quite a long time, who have developed a sense of entitlement when it comes to our time. It’s not unusual to hear about a bestie feeling displaced and upset because a new man is in the picture. You’re not able to have as many phone conversations or hang out together as much, because you’ve got new priorities. The more your relationship grows with the new person in your life, the less time you have on your hands to devote to others.

    This happened to Tammy, when at forty-one, and with two college aged kids, she married a wonderful man. Her friends had been with her through thick and thin. They all comforted and encouraged one another through broken marriages, the toils of being single, and the struggles of raising children as single parents. Tammy knew her friends were thrilled for her happiness, but they were accustomed to keeping each other in the loop. As her new relationship grew and ultimately blossomed into marriage, Tammy didn’t feel the need to communicate with her close friends about new changes, boundaries, or how she would need to handle any of it. She was so engrossed with the new man that she wasn’t even aware she was letting her friendships slip through the cracks.

    1Peter 4:8(NASB) says, “8 Above all, keep fervent in your love for one another, because love covers a multitude of sins. 9 Be hospitable to one another without complaint. 10 As each one has received a special gift, employ it in serving one another as good stewards of the manifold grace of God.” We’re not exempt from this passage just because we find Mr. Right. One of the greatest and most profound lessons we must learn is one concerning what we need to do as single women to build a landing strip for the blessing of marriage. As friends and wives, God’s standard is that we serve one another as good stewards of His manifold grace. Yes, our priorities must change when we partner, but as God so beautifully tells us in 1Peter 4:8, the love of Christ will cover a multitude of sins.

    Job 6:14(NIV) tells us, “Anyone who withholds kindness from a friend forsakes the fear of the Almighty.” Kindness dictates honesty, compassion, and communication. All three are necessary to convey to those who have supported us that we’re continually appreciative of them, and we need their understanding as we navigate a new chapter in our lives. When Tammy and her husband planned a trip and needed to depend on trustworthy friends to check in on their home while they were away, she was surprised by some of their comments. Although willing to help, her longtime girlfriends felt as if they had been kicked to the curb by Tammy, and had no problem saying so.

    Sometimes friends we’ve had a long time must go their separate ways when life-changing events occur. Everyone can’t go where we’re going, and it is necessary to part ways, but this isn’t always the case. We need good people in our lives, and we also need to continue the ministry of being a loving, supportive friend. It is one that keeps us operating out of the love of Christ as we are a blessing to others. If we allow the love of Christ to rule our hearts in this area, we’ll find that our friends will be much more understanding. Again, this requires us to be honest, thoughtful, and keep the lines of communication open. If we do this and allow the Holy Spirit to lead and guide us, we can establish boundaries that honor our significant relationships and maintain the friendships that are so dear to us as well. ■

    Scripture taken from the NEW AMERICAN STANDARD BIBLE®, Copyright © 1960,1962,1963,1968,1971,1972,1973,1975,1977,1995 by The Lockman Foundation. Used by permission.

    Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

    “As We Go Our Separate Ways”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2021. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.