Find A Christian Man

Tag: Christian Women Organization

Can He Find You?

A good friend of mine is a very attractive guy. He has a good job, dresses very nicely and receives tons of attention from women. I think he knows that he’s handsome, but not in an egotistical way. Although he’s quite a bit younger than me, I find his demeanor beyond his years. He has a very quiet nature and has wanted to meet someone to settle down with for quite some time. We’ve had a few conversations about this, and if I’m being honest, I have to say that I’m kind of shocked by his situation. Given his sweet personality, I find it hard to believe that with all the attention he gets, he hasn’t come close to finding the right woman. One of the things that his situation brings out is that many men today are flooded with options, but there are so few women who make themselves stand out from the rest. So, it’s possible a good man wouldn’t recognize the right woman if she were standing right in front of him.

Proverbs 18:22(NKJV) says, “He who finds a wife finds a good thing, and obtains favor from the LORD.” The number of discussions, explanations, and opinions about this verse are endless. It’s led to a series of subjects covered in many Christian retreats for singles, and the question about whether God is okay with a woman pursuing a man is always a debate starter. The light that Jesus Christ sheds on the practice of debating scripture is clear in Matthew 22:23. This verse tells us that he was approached by some Sadducees, and they posed a question about the resurrection, wanting to know how it applied to Mosaic Law. They expected to find some flaw in the truth he taught, and they also expected that Jesus Christ would not be able to exceed their level of intellect and understanding. How wrong they were. Jesus Christ told them in Matthew 22:29(NLT), “Your mistake is that you don’t know the Scriptures, and you don’t know the power of God.”

Theologians and Biblical scholars have helped us to understand God’s Word tremendously, but many of them have educated themselves to the point of losing the simplicity of God’s truth. Our Heavenly Father’s power and favor are unequaled. He has made no mistake in His Word about His standard of what constitutes a good wife or about the favor upon the man who has undertaken to find her. Rest assured when a man seeks God and desires a good wife, he will be blessed to find her, but both the man and the woman have equally important roles in this equation.

The responsibility of a good woman is to make sure she can be recognized as such. She can have all the makings of a good wife, but if she doesn’t look like one, her potential husband might be looking her straight in the eye and not recognize she’s ‘wifey.’ If we don’t look like a Godly treasure, we may not be recognized as one. There’s a very real temptation to try to imitate, dress like, and conform to what we see on social media and television. God tells us in Romans 12:2(NIV), “Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.” As believers, we simply cannot do what we see others doing. This doesn’t mean that our style or pizazz has to be less, but we should see it as a privilege to look like we love God. It’s not a burden, but a supreme blessing to honor Him in all that we do.

Colossians 3:17(NLT) tells us, “And whatever you do or say, do it as a representative of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks through him to God the Father.” Our walk with God through the example of Jesus Christ is a supreme privilege and honor. Everything we do, every choice and decision we make each day is one that either honors our commitment to God through the example of Christ or takes away from it. Colossians 3:18(NLT) goes on to tell us, “Wives, submit to your husbands, as is fitting for those who belong to the Lord.” How we submit to God shows Him whether we are prepared to submit to our husbands. We have to begin now putting ourselves in check, because some of our habit patterns have to die to see other parts of us thrive. Our prayers to Heavenly Father should include our desire to understand what He is requiring of us. And when we see in His Word that we need to make some adjustments or corrections, we need to make them, and He will reward us for doing so.■

Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

“Can He Find You?”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2022. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

March 12, 2023
The WE Project

Psalm 127:1(NLT)
“Unless the Lord builds a house, the work of the builders is wasted. Unless the Lord protects a city, guarding it with sentries will do no good.”

Over the years, I’ve seen and enjoyed the many wonderful blessings that the Lord has given me. He’s brought people into my life to bless me, and I’ve also watched people walk out of my life. Sometimes, certain people chose to leave, and it was painful to watch and experience, but I realized that it was also a very necessary thing. Like everyone else’s, my life is a work in progress. It’s a project that I’m working with the Lord to perfect. When I try to take the lead and make decisions and choices on my own, things don’t work out. But I’ve learned, and sometimes learned the hard way, that when I allow the Lord to lead, guide, and direct me, I’m never disappointed with the results. If I meet someone new, rather than assuming they are a blessing, I surrender it to the Lord. I pray to be guided by Him and allow Him the space to confirm that they are indeed a blessing. And if they aren’t, I thank God and ask Him to keep them moving along their merry way.

It’s challenging for some of us to do this. We’re wired to desire companionship, and when we meet someone new that seems to be nice, we prematurely assume he’s the one we’ve been waiting for. This isn’t always the case. Through the Lord Jesus Christ, we can avoid costly mistakes. Our Heavenly Father is not slack in any way and nothing slips by Him. Isaiah 45:15 declares that He works in mysterious ways. He opens some doors, and He keeps other doors closed for good. We should be incredibly thankful for how He guides us. If we seek Him, God will close the door before we become invested in relationships that are sent by the devil to cause great harm. Sometimes, it’s not immediately apparent to us what is happening, but if we will just be patient and give things time, God will make them plain and steer us in the right direction.

The psalmist said in Psalm 138:8(NLT), “The LORD will work out his plans for my life—for your faithful love, O LORD, endures forever. Don’t abandon me, for you made me.” This verse is so beautiful, and it should instill such confidence in us regarding God’s careful watch over His children. We are in partnership with Heavenly Father. We are in Christ, and Christ is in us. Our lives are a “WE” project that is orchestrated and led by God. It’s the Father and us, working together to achieve His purpose. Philippians 2:13(NLT) declares, “For God is working in you, giving you the desire and the power to do what pleases him.” He is at work within, and He’s communicating with our human spirit through His Holy Spirit. The information He communicates is all about leading us in the direction of the best that we can receive.

Philippians 2:13 doesn’t mean that God is inside controlling us like puppets. He’s giving us direction and guidance, but it is up to us to follow it. He tells us to renew our minds to His Word, to read and study it so it becomes a part of us. We do this in order to get our minds and hearts on board with the direction we have received from Him. In the WE Project of our lives, we must be fully surrendered to God through Jesus Christ. Our faith must be such that “if God says it, then it is the absolute best for my life!” because He never makes a mistake and everything that He does is perfect.

There have been times when I didn’t trust God as I should. I had a plan in mind and set out to make it happen. I plowed ahead with a big dose of stubbornness and ended up making mistakes that could have been avoided. These mistakes and missteps allowed me to see that I don’t have all the answers. I can’t see the big picture that God sees, so there’s no way I can know the pitfalls and plots that satan will try to use to set me up and set me back. But trusting God is forever in my best interest. It’s our Father in Heaven that holds everything all together. Don’t get me wrong, we can make plans, but we must seek God before we execute them. When we seek Him for direction, through a nudge, Word, dream, or vision, we will receive what we need to change or stay the course.

When I’m trying to make it a project of ‘me’ instead of ‘WE’, or trying to make things happen out of my own strength and not inviting God’s wisdom, I find myself working harder and not smarter; I end up wasting time. So, these days, when I’m confused or feel insecure about the way I’m proceeding in life, I stop and ask God if He is pleased with what I’m doing. I take time to examine if I have removed Jesus Christ from the driver’s seat. What a blessing to know that every time we ask Heavenly Father what to do or how to proceed in life, He answers us so sweetly by offering to guide us through His love.

Jesus Christ teaches us in John 15:5(NLT), “Yes, I am the vine; you are the branches. Those who remain in me, and I in them, will produce much fruit. For apart from me you can do nothing.” As single women desiring marriage, we must realize that when we try to take matters into our own hands and make things happen, they will not turn out the way we expect. Sometimes the result is that we will have taken several steps backward instead of forward. Things will turn into nothing when we don’t allow Jesus Christ to steer our lives. God is sure to finish the ‘WE Project’ that He started in us through Jesus Christ. We must never doubt this. Total re-programing of our thoughts and attitudes in order to let God take the lead in everything we do; this is what’s required. We must immerse ourselves in our oneness with Him through Jesus Christ. He has heard our prayers, and He will cause all things to work together for our benefit according to His perfect and divine timing. ■

Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

“The WE Project”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2022. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

March 5, 2023
God’s Will Is for Two to Become One

1 Corinthians 7:3-5(NLT)

“3 The husband should fulfill his wife’s sexual needs, and the wife should fulfill her husband’s needs. 4 The wife gives authority over her body to her husband, and the husband gives authority over his body to his wife.

5 Do not deprive each other of sexual relations, unless you both agree to refrain from sexual intimacy for a limited time so you can give yourselves more completely to prayer. Afterward, you should come together again so that Satan won’t be able to tempt you because of your lack of self-control.”

There’s no need to tiptoe around it. The question that is on the minds of many single women that desire marriage is when it will happen. Part of encouraging one another towards the goal of marrying well is to speak the truth in love. There are some subjects that believers have been known to tiptoe around, and one of them is physical intimacy in the marital relationship. It’s a deeply private issue, but also a very necessary and natural discussion to have, especially before you get married. God said in Genesis 2:24(NKJV), “Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.” We need to have a serious conversation with God about becoming one with the man that He desires to walk with us through life. The habits we’ve developed, and the expectations and incorrect beliefs we have around God’s plan for becoming one, will need to be addressed before we take that walk down the aisle.

Quite frankly, for many singles, the habits they’ve developed when it comes to satisfying the flesh are ones that were adopted from society. It’s so far from God’s Word that people don’t even believe they can be married to one person for life anymore. They assume divorce is inevitable, and that on a whim people are free to fall out of love as quickly as they fall in love. This isn’t the ‘becoming one’ that God had in mind. His grace is sufficient toward us, and He forgives our shortcomings, but we can never place ourselves or our own personal agendas above God’s standard.

Our faith towards marriage can’t be built on what society says, because that’s not faith. Romans 10:17 tells us that faith comes by hearing the Word of God. It comes by the truth, so if we abdicate God’s standard, we no longer have the truth, and a person cannot have faith if they don’t believe and trust the truth. God’s Word is the only solid foundation that exists, and if we try to build a marriage without it, we’re in trouble.

One of the things we’re witnessing is that there is a tremendous amount of people who believe that God will reward them when they haven’t walked according to His Word. We can’t pretend to be committed to God; we must really be committed to Him. We have to love Him with all our hearts, souls, minds, and strength. So, if we are truly honoring God’s standard of becoming one with the man we will marry, we must repent from becoming one with men that we didn’t marry.

To repent is to have a change of heart and mind. It’s to completely change the way we’re thinking and believing about something so that our thoughts, feelings, and actions line up with the example of Jesus Christ.

Our Heavenly Father ordained that a husband and wife become one before Him. You and I have no other choice but to conclude that He did this because it was very important to His plan. When we step outside the boundaries of what He has ordained, repentance is critically necessary. Heavenly Father wants to give us the blessing we greatly desire, but He cannot reward us if our hearts are too stubborn and arrogant to recognize we need to repent. He wants to help us lay up treasures so that we don’t allow the enemy to continue to steal from us. There must be within us a Godly sorrow for not doing as the Father commanded, for it is in this deep place of remorse for our actions against His Will that we can also accept His forgiveness.

Whether married or waiting to meet our husbands, we must not allow satan to tempt us with a lack of self-control. Our desire to please God must be greater than our desire for any other thing, because this speaks to our commitment to Him. Throughout God’s Word, He continually reminds His people to be holy and committed so He can bless them. He’s very willing to aid us and has placed His Spirit within the born-again believer to guide, teach, and comfort us. We must be settled and clear in our minds and hearts that physical intimacy was sanctioned by God for marriage. This is His standard, and nothing is comparable to God’s perfection. He never changes and He always tells us what pleases Him, and what pleases God is always best.■

Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

“God’s Will Is for Two to Become One”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2022. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

February 26, 2023
He Was Not Meant to Be The One

When feelings of loneliness creep up on us, our response must be to immediately renew our minds to the promises of God. Loneliness can be a lure that the adversary uses to sabotage our ability to make wise choices and decisions. There are situations and circumstances that the devil designs to remove us from the path of God’s blessings. We’ve all heard about those “Wham!!!” moments in life where things are going smoothly, and life is good, then wham! Something totally out of the blue happens and causes us to take a nosedive into the abyss of confusion and trouble. This happened to a woman I know who had been wonderfully blessed in her professional life. A beautiful home, nice car, nice things; she enjoyed a really comfortable life, but she took it all for granted, and a wrong turn cost her almost everything.

She met a man that she didn’t expect to meet, and it would be easy to blame him for all her troubles, because that’s what many of us do, but it started long before he arrived on the scene. He had all the right attributes that she wanted, and they seemed to be a good match. He’s an electrician and entrepreneur, and not only is he ambitious, he was generous with his advice and helpfulness. She assumed he was the one she had been praying about and waiting for, and she never waited for God to clarify it for sure.

One of the common mistakes that many believers make is to underestimate the importance of showing God true gratitude and thankfulness for His many blessings. It’s true that we work hard to acquire nice things, but our Heavenly Father makes it all possible. As a demonstration of our gratitude to God, we must sow into His Kingdom, and we must be sure to take care of the blessings He’s given us. As single women believers that have been blessed to achieve success, it is wonderful to share it, but we need to be led by God’s Spirit so that we are wise about our decisions and choices. The man that we will bless greatly and who will bless us greatly is in God’s plan, and we should never overstep God’s leadership in this area.

Galatians 5:16(NLT) tells us, “So I say, let the Holy Spirit guide your lives. Then you won’t be doing what your sinful nature craves.” For many women that have experienced the pain of loneliness from being single longer than they imagined, when they meet someone that seems to be a good fit, the inclination is to dive right in. It is important for us to realize that God wants to be involved in this area of our lives, and He will help us to steer clear of harm and disappointment if we allow Him.

Although kind and helpful, the electrician was not the one in God’s plan for this woman’s life. She didn’t give herself time to really get to know him, and she didn’t wait on the Father. She didn’t know that this ambitious entrepreneur had tried lots of things in the past to become the millionaire he had always dreamed he’d be, and he was far too trusting of others. He convinced her to invest her money into a new venture of his, and they both were the worse for it.

Psalm 27:14(NIV) tells us, “Wait for the LORD; be strong and take heart and wait for the LORD.” It’s not always easy to pump the breaks, and to stop ourselves from emotionally investing so deeply in a man who is being attentive and kind, but we must understand that things can turn very quickly. We can’t be naïve. We must be spiritually mature enough to understand that satan is vicious and has no mercy, and he will use our willingness to leap before we look against us. We must wait for the Lord and be strong in our convictions to do so. God will not disappoint us if we do this. Psalm 25:3(NLT) says, “No one who trusts in you will ever be disgraced.” Heavenly Father is faithful to protect us, but we must wait on His direction. ■

Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

“He Was Not Meant to Be The One”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2022. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

February 6, 2023
Completely Convinced in God

“Faith shows the reality of what we hope for; it is the evidence of things we cannot see.”
Hebrews 11:1(NLT)

Getting married is a request in the prayers of many single women. Some are crying out to God with urgency. They feel their hope for marriage doesn’t seem to be getting any closer to materializing their desired results. They are increasingly disillusioned with dating and losing hope in the prospect of marriage. The experience of many singles is to meet someone, date for a few months, talk about the future and then ‘poof’, the relationship fizzles before it even has a chance to develop into something meaningful. It can be emotionally taxing, and most of us want to get off this merry-go-round.

Marriage is indeed a blessing from God. It requires that faith isn’t just something we go to at the point it seems the relationship is fizzling. Faith must be anchored in our minds and hearts before we get into relationships, so that we are not just dating to be dating. When our faith is in God through the Lord Jesus Christ, we date with God’s purpose in mind, and we don’t have to waste our emotional resources becoming invested when the person was never meant to be a destiny partner.

1John 5:4(NLT) tells us, “For every child of God defeats this evil world, and we achieve this victory through our faith.” There is no question that marriage is a beautiful thing, but we bring things into it that are not so beautiful. In fact, there’s some baggage we’re carrying that will bring down our future marriages with unnecessary and toxic weight. God will help us get rid of this stuff now, so that we aren’t outsmarted or defeated by the devil. Victory is when we are prepared through Jesus Christ to stand on the Word of God so that whatever plots, tricks, and traps the enemy sends against our unions, we are able to stand firm.

The reality is that wherever we are in our walk with Christ, faith is required to see any kind of movement from God in our situation. Because our Heavenly Father is completely invested in us – just like we want a man to be, God is already there. He wants to see us grow in Him and to grow in our faith. He already sees us standing strong in Christ with the blessings we desire most, and our reality must match what He sees. You may envision yourself as someone’s wife. You may believe that you’re ready and spiritually prepared, however, in God’s eyes, your faith isn’t quite there. You must trust that God knows better than you, and you must be convinced that He will help you prepare if you humble yourself before Him.

Our faith is how we respond to God. It is how we show Heavenly Father that we trust Him. If our response isn’t one that is completely convinced of His goodness, and if our response doesn’t reflect that we know He always knows best, then we must make a shift in our thinking and believing. We can’t do our own thing just because we think it feels right. Romans 10:17 tells us that faith comes by hearing the Word of God. The only way to hear the Word of God is to read it, listen to it, and speak it to yourself.

Both our minds and our hearts must be completely convinced that what God said He’s going to do He will most certainly do. He said He would give you the desires of your heart if you remain anchored in Christ and occupy your thoughts and intentions with pleasing Him. This means that your entire agenda can’t be about what pleases YOU, it must be about pleasing God with your whole life. If there’s any possibility that you are not where you need to be in the faith, pray and get into God’s Word more, then watch as He rewards your increased commitment to put Him first.■

Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

“Completely Convinced in God”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2022. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

December 5, 2022
Never Judge A Book by Its Cover

One Saturday afternoon, while I was parked at the grocery store and still sitting in my car, my oldest daughter nudged me as I was busy searching for my grocery list in my purse. “Ma, look at him! Oh, my goodness! He’s absolutely gorgeous! I hope my husband looks like that!” She said. This man was impeccable. The grooming, the styling, the smile—mesmerizing. It was almost as if he walked in slow motion so that we could take in every ounce of his handsomeness. Instantly you assume that someone that pretty on the outside is equally so on the inside. You can’t judge a book by its cover. This is a lesson that maturity and a few heartaches under your belt will teach you. I schooled my daughter with the same wisdom I received from my mother; looks aren’t everything, it’s the heart of a person that you want to see. But like many of us, sometimes we learn this lesson the hard way.

The cover of a book typically gives us an indication or an inkling about its contents. It often evokes an emotional response from us. The cover is supposed to whet our appetites and make us curious and excited to read what’s inside the cover. It shouldn’t be lost on us that sometimes the cover is misleading. We open the book, begin to read its contents, and may find that the inside is quite different from the outside. The outside may be incredibly appealing, but the inside may pale in comparison. So, although some books are as exhilarating and interesting as their covers, some are not, and that can be disappointing.

In the Old Testament, Saul was appointed the first king of God’s people, the children of Israel. From all accounts, his exterior was very pleasing to the eye. He was strong and virile, and looked like one would expect a king to look. Samuel, God’s prophet, was very fond of King Saul, and for a time, Saul followed God’s statutes and led the people as God instructed, but this changed. Saul began to think that he knew better than God, and he started to do things his own way. Of course, Heavenly Father found this unacceptable and rejected Saul as king of Israel. God selected another king, and Samuel the prophet was saddened because of his fondness for Saul.

God told him in 1Samuel 16:1(NLT), “Now the LORD said to Samuel, “You have mourned long enough for Saul. I have rejected him as king of Israel, so fill your flask with olive oil and go to Bethlehem. Find a man named Jesse who lives there, for I have selected one of his sons to be my king.” Saul had the right cover—he looked the part of a king, but the content of his heart was disappointing. Again, Samuel had grown very fond of him and was attached to Saul so to speak, so much so that he mourned over God’s rejection of Saul. We can understand this so well, because sometimes we meet someone who is attractive, and their looks draw us in. After we get to know them better, it might be clear that their character isn’t as attractive as their exterior, but we develop an attachment. We want them in our lives, but deep down, we know this isn’t a person that can walk with us through life.

When Samuel saw one of Jesse’s sons that was striking and virile, he thought surely he was the one. Again, he was making a character judgment that was based on the exterior and not on the interior. In 1Samuel 16:7(NLT), the Lord told Samuel, “Don’t judge by his appearance or height, for I have rejected him. The LORD doesn’t see things the way you see them. People judge by outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart.” Our Heavenly Father is schooling us on His standard for choosing what is best. It’s about the heart.

Samuel obeyed God because he knew that God always knows best. You and I must have this confidence towards God in our hearts as well. We must have faith that not only does God know what is in our hearts, but He knows what’s in the heart of the person we choose. Sometimes, the wrong things are in that person’s heart, and they will end up causing us great harm or causing us to miss the blessings God wants to give us. When it comes to dating and finding the right person for us, surrendering our decision making to the guidance of the Lord is the very best thing we can do. It can be fun and exciting to look at the cover of a beautiful book, but we shouldn’t invest our time and energy into reading it unless God tells us the contents are as pleasing to Him as the cover.■

Scripture quotations marked (MSG) are taken from The Message. Copyright ©1993, 1994, 1995, 1996, 2000, 2001, 2002. Used by permission of NavPress Publishing Group.

Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

“Never Judge A Book By Its Cover”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2022. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

November 28, 2022
You Know I’m Single…

An actor was being interviewed and jokingly asked if the host had a single family member or friend that she could meet. “You know I’m single.” She said. The host responded, “Every time you’ve been on our show, you’re always single, what gives?” It doesn’t matter if you’re a beautiful Hollywood actor, a professional, or a single mother trying to get back out there and juggle all the other responsibilities of life, the dating arena can be challenging to navigate. We’re all so different, and so are our needs, but the complexities of meeting someone that isn’t married and is actually looking for something meaningful seems almost too much to tackle. People are constantly saying that the special person for us is out there, but if that’s true, where are they hiding and why is it so difficult to find them?

Meeting the right person for our lives is a process of self-discovery. That sounds like a pitch right out of some guide to meeting your soul-mate, but as cheesy as it may sound, it’s true. The foundation of the process of self-discovery is first recognizing the truth about what ‘self’ means. Self-identity is Christ identity. People spend their whole lives trying to discover who they are, when God took care of that through Jesus Christ. Everything we need to know about who God created us to be can be found in Christ.

If you give it some thought, you’ll see that if we’re not quite sure who God created us to be or what we’re supposed to be doing on this earth, then there’s probably a big question mark branded on our foreheads. We can’t see it, but it’s there, and it shouldn’t be hard for us to understand that no one wants to get to know a question mark. People are looking for something real. A question mark suggests all the issues associated with not really knowing who you are—issues like poor judgment, lack of confidence, and an inability to truly and deeply be loyal and committed. As sisters in the Lord, we wouldn’t want someone like this as a marital partner, so we must make sure there’s no trace of it in us.

There isn’t anything about us that God doesn’t know. Ephesians 1:4-5 tells us that before He made the world, He already loved us and chose us to be His very own. God wants us to be holy because He is holy. Holiness envelopes the bond of unity we share with Him. Our Heavenly Father tailor made us to fit into His wonderful plan. For a long time, before we knew Christ, we didn’t know about God’s plan or how we fit into it. We were lost—just didn’t have a clue who we were supposed to be, but God’s love began to unfold in our lives when we accepted Christ. The problem is that many of us stopped short. We haven’t allowed God’s blueprint to spread out, so we can study the full view. Instead, we got just a glimpse and started to run with our assumptions. So, for many single and unmarried individuals, self-discovery has not come to full maturity. God is telling them that there’s still more they need to learn about Jesus Christ before they can partner successfully.

Thousands of years ago, God knew that there would be a multitude of single women praying to Him for a good man. Even back then He considered the challenges for our modern times. We have to remember that He knows the end at the very beginning. You can be confident that He knows all the details of how you will finally meet the man that you’ve prayed for. And make no mistake, He also knows what it will take for you to get in position for this blessing as well.

God is an Excellent Giver. He doesn’t give gifts to those that are not ready to receive them or who lack the ability and well of gratitude to steward and be thankful for them. Heavenly Father is perfect in every way. The special person for us isn’t hiding. They are preparing, just as we should be. God has made sure there are enough spouses for those seeking to honor the institution of marriage. Not every man can be a husband, just as not every woman can be a wife. It takes a humble, forgiving, loving and committed human being to be truly ready to partner with another human being in marriage. Dating is easy, but marriage requires stability and truth.

Joshua 1:8(NLT) tells us, “Study this Book of Instruction continually. Meditate on it day and night so you will be sure to obey everything written in it. Only then will you prosper and succeed in all you do.” God wants His children to be fulfilled, happy and successful, and He’s left it up to us to make it happen for ourselves through His Word. He tells us in Romans 6:13(NLT), “Do not let any part of your body become an instrument of evil to serve sin. Instead, give yourselves completely to God, for you were dead, but now you have new life. So use your whole body as an instrument to do what is right for the glory of God.” This is God’s requirement. He wants us to be married and partnered up more than we desire it for ourselves. Keeping His Word is paramount to our success.

As we study God’s Word, we can see that He never overlooks a promise. He is faithful to keep His Word. He has promised to bless us, but He is also committed to see us fulfill our purpose. He is committed to see us capture our destinies according to His Will and Plan. As unmarried people, we have to go to Heavenly Father with a deeply humbled heart and do so in the most earnest way that we know. We must ask Him what more we need to do in order to fit into His plan. We must ask Him what part of our old man nature we need to take off, so we can walk more fully in Christ. Then, we must wait on God as He unveils the answers to these questions. God knows you are single, and He will take care of every detail regarding meeting your destiny partner but seeking Him must remain your primary motivation and you must be committed to follow His guidance. ■

Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

“You Know I’m Single…”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2022. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

October 31, 2022
Balance Requires the Right Measurement

When the Children of Israel were in the wilderness, God fed them manna from heaven. 2Corinithans 3:5 tells us that God is our sufficiency. He takes care of our every need. He does this for each of us, and He did it for His people that were living during Old Testament times. The scriptures tell us that the manna God rained from heaven completely nourished the people. None of them got sick and they had plenty to feed their families. The truth we need to digest from this wonderful record of God’s provision is that He hasn’t changed. He’s the same yesterday, today, and forever. Modern day thinking has caused some to conclude that when it comes to His provision, marriage is excluded, but this isn’t the truth. If there’s any semblance of this notion in our minds and hearts, we need to abolish those thoughts and renew our minds to God’s Word.

God has given us His Word so that we can walk with Him and learn to structure our lives so that we walk in His truth and not become blinded by the tricks of the devil. Numbers 23:19(NLT) tells us, “God is not a man, so he does not lie. He is not human, so he does not change his mind.” Modern times may bring higher levels of intelligence and convenience, but God is not moved by any of it. We are modernized only to the extent that He allows us access to His wisdom through Jesus Christ. History has proven that as we know more, we think of more clever ways to destroy one another and turn our backs on God. As believers, we can never allow humanity’s advances to cause the truth of God’s goodness and sovereignty to slip in our minds and hearts.

Marriage is the institution God set up from the very beginning, with Adam and Eve. Marriage belongs to Him, and He has given it to us because it serves His plan and purpose. Heavenly Father is not like us. We vacillate constantly with our plans, intentions, and desires; but God never does. Marriage is a blessing, and again, like all blessings, it belongs to God. We are absolutely in right standing to pray in the powerful name of Jesus Christ for this blessed union to come to pass in our lives.

Some of us think and pray for marriage as if it’s a new thing that God has to do in our lives. Marriage has already been established in His Word as part of His Will. It is as organic and natural to life as breathing. Many have tried to take marriage outside the boundaries of God’s plan, and they are missing the blessing altogether. It would be absurd to think for one moment that God doesn’t know the best person for our lives and hasn’t included this in His plan for us. He knows us far better than we could ever know ourselves, and there are some qualities in our personhood that have yet to mature. There are areas where we should have grown beyond the baby’s milk stage, but we haven’t. It impossible for God to fail and He never makes a mistake. Marriage will naturally come into our lives when walking in His Will through Jesus Christ is the greatest desire of our lives. This is the level of spiritual maturity that puts out the welcome mat for God’s treasures.

In many instances, many single believers are out of balance when it comes to their expectations for marriage. They want to receive much but give little, and of course, none of us will ever admit to such a thing, but the reality is that being out of balance in this way will not allow for the kind of spiritual maturity marriage requires. In Exodus 16:16-20(NLT), God has given us a tremendous example of how He views balance. This passage tells us, “16 These are the LORD’s instructions: Each household should gather as much as it needs. Pick up two quarts for each person in your tent.” 17 So the people of Israel did as they were told. Some gathered a lot, some only a little. 18 But when they measured it out, everyone had just enough. Those who gathered a lot had nothing left over, and those who gathered only a little had enough. Each family had just what it needed. 19 Then Moses told them, “Do not keep any of it until morning.” 20 But some of them didn’t listen and kept some of it until morning. But by then it was full of maggots and had a terrible smell. Moses was very angry with them.”

An understanding of God’s Will and Word regarding His provision is absolutely critical. Singledom comes with all kinds of lists, tips, questions, and analysis, and these all claim to move the dial further along. Some of them might actually be helpful, but the reality is that faith comes by hearing the Word of God. Faith requires truth, and only the truth will bring the victory Christ has given us. When we lack the humility to deliver everything over to God, we are prioritizing our agenda over His. We begin asking for all kinds of qualities and characteristics in the person we will marry, when we ourselves are not equal to what we’re asking for. We want someone loving, compassionate, loyal, and generous, when some of us haven’t worked those fruits into our own lives sufficiently.

God told the people, “Gather what you NEED.” It’s obvious from their actions that they couldn’t be trusted to be true to their own needs. They took more than they needed, and this brought about a stench that the Father would not tolerate. Here’s the thing we can’t afford to miss; God knew their needs, and this was spiritually and perfectly calculated into His provision. Please make sure you don’t miss the revelation of this awesome truth. Because God’s provision could in no way be manipulated, those that gathered a lot, had nothing left, and those that didn’t gather enough had just what they needed.

The gratitude and understanding of God’s perfection and sovereignty cannot be out of place when we are desiring marriage. The desire for marriage is not outside of God’s Will. It is a benefit of being in His Will. He, and He alone, takes care of what’s in His Will. ■

English Standard Version (ESV)
The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. ESV® Text Edition: 2016. Copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers.

Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

“Balance Requires the Right Measurement”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2022. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

August 29, 2022
Praying to Cross His Path

For a single Christian woman that is praying to cross paths with her future husband, if you haven’t met him yet, then you’re still in the process of spiritual preparation. You still have the awesome privilege to continue receiving guidance and instruction from the Holy Spirit. He prepares you to be the wife that God wants you to be. Many single sisters in Christ have questioned this. They don’t understand why spiritual preparation is necessary for marriage, and if it is, why is it taking so long? Spiritual preparation consists of the steps we take through Jesus Christ to be strengthened in his faith, power, and ability. Jesus Christ teaches in Luke 12:48 that to whom much is given much is required. Heavenly Father has called each of us to be good stewards of His blessings, and we certainly can’t satisfy this if we lack the spiritual strength and maturity to get it done.

Hebrews 11:6 (NKJV) says, “But without faith it is impossible to please Him, for he who comes to God must believe that He is, and that He is a rewarder of those who diligently seek Him.” Diligently seeking God is required to receive His rewards. Anything less than what He requires will not do. Believers and unbelievers alike attempt to butt up against this truth, but it is unyielding. God has a plan for each of us. Age, background, status, or any other human standard doesn’t matter. The Will of God requires that our feet are firmly planted on the path to God’s purpose in order to receive His rewards. One of the ways we ensure we’re on this path is to examine and correct the actions we’re taking to make room for the husband we hope to meet.

Don’t be a wanderer
The children of Israel wandered around in circles in the desert for 40 years because they couldn’t get on board with having faith in God. Heavenly Father’s Word tells us that they were so indoctrinated with the mindset of their prior enslavement that they wouldn’t handle the task of changing their thought paradigm. The practice of wandering was more comfortable to them than the practice of reaching and stretching forth to newness. They refused to release old dead things, and therefore were ill-prepared with the spiritual strength to reach out and grab what God promised. It was their responsibility to prepare, and they refused to do it. Because of this refusal, those who would not change did not receive the promise.

God is perfect, and so is His path and purpose. The plan He has for your life is a good plan, but it is in no way arbitrary or random. We can’t do whatever we want to do and expect that it fulfills our call. The question to ask is whether we have the humility to ask God what He requires us to do and whether we have the patience to wait for His answer. We can’t keep wandering, being inconsistent and vacillating back and forth in our obligation to the faith. God requires more of us, and we must seek Him and be guided by Him to achieve His purpose. Our spiritual growth in Christ is what’s most important to God, and He is going to require us to lean into Him in a greater way and to step outside our comfort zones to seek His purpose.

Don’t misuse the gift
1Corinthians 7:3-5 (NLT) says,“3 The husband should fulfill his wife’s sexual needs, and the wife should fulfill her husband’s needs. 4 The wife gives authority over her body to her husband, and the husband gives authority over his body to his wife. 5 Do not deprive each other of sexual relations, unless you both agree to refrain from sexual intimacy for a limited time so you can give yourselves more completely to prayer. Afterward, you should come together again so that Satan won’t be able to tempt you because of your lack of self-control.”

We can think, say, and feel however we like on the subject of sexual intimacy, but God is the only One who can set the standard for how this aspect of marriage should be handled. Whether we want to admit it or not, corporately, we’re paying a hefty price for taking what God ordained for marriage and using it for quick pleasure with individuals that were never destined to be our spouses. Heavenly Father specifically tells us in 1Corinthians 7:4 that a woman has authority over her body. He commands that she give this authority to her husband, and the husband will do the same. In your quiet time, make a mental note of the individuals that were not your husband, yet you gave them this authority in the past. Forgive yourself for your errors in judgement, but most importantly, repent for misusing the gift of your incredible womanhood to appease someone who didn’t honor you the way Christ does.

The husband that God has ordained for your destiny is worthy of the authority you are commanded by God to give him. Now is the time to honor your future husband, even though you may not have crossed his path. Make a commitment that you will not give to another what belongs to him alone.

Marriage belongs to God, don’t try to take it
Loneliness, isolation, unfulfilled desires and dreams, these are among the many things that can make us feel sad. Understand with all that you are that there is no cure for all that makes us sad outside of Jesus Christ. He is the answer and following him leads us to freedom in every area of our lives. All things have been placed under his feet, and this includes marriage. It doesn’t matter how many dating sites a single person has signed up for, if the person she meets isn’t aligned with God’s plan for her life, this person will not be the blessing she hopes he will be.

Marriage belongs to God. It brings glory to Him or else He would not have sanctioned it. How much faith do you have in the institution of marriage that God has ordained, and how willing are you to change in order to have the kind of marriage God wants you to have? Jesus Christ is our example, and this example is not outdated in the least bit. The example of Christ is life for us, and we can only access the more than abundant life by living in and through him. Are you willing and able to offer another individual the love of Christ in such a way that they are inspired to keep him continually at the center of their lives? Even if you’re not quite there, you must be on your way. The spiritual disciplines you practice must be firmly anchored in your everyday life, so that you are not moved from Christ, no matter who loves you or who doesn’t.

Make no mistake, God is more committed to preserve and protect you than you are to preserve and protect yourself. He knows that the wrong person can cause you dreadful harm and the right person can cause you tremendous good. Make sure you never attempt to take what belongs to God and make it your own. Don’t try to get ahead of the Holy Spirit, for that is always a reckless and futile endeavor. Focus on God by staying in His Word, praying often, and following the example of Christ. Heavenly Father knows how to bless us with marriage. He does it His way, and His way alone. Be dutiful to stay in your lane. Honor the privilege and responsibility to remain spiritually prepared for what God has in store. ■

Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

“Praying to Cross His Path”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2022. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

August 22, 2022
Looking Like A Trick Or A Blessing

I heard a young man talk about his perception of how a Godly woman behaves verses how a woman of the world behaves. A woman of the world is a woman that adopts society’s standards over God’s standards. She loves what the world loves, and she hates what the world hates. A Godly woman is a woman who lives according to the standard and example of Christ; she loves what God loves. Well, this young man said he believes social media plays a major role in a woman’s identity these days, even down to the way she dresses. He believes that many Godly women are abdicating God’s standard and allowing them to be eroded in their lives. Like me, I’m sure you’ve heard these criticisms. Some of our veterans have complained that Christian women are wearing revealing clothes that suggest they are everything but a woman of God. It’s not a new practice to allow clothing to make a statement about who we are or how we want to be perceived. However, we can never escape the reality that the benefits of being and looking Godly will forever outweigh those of being and looking sexy.

1Peter 2:9-10(NLT) tells us, “9 But you are not like that, for you are a chosen people. You are royal priests, a holy nation, God’s very own possession. As a result, you can show others the goodness of God, for he called you out of the darkness into his wonderful light. 10 “Once you had no identity as a people; now you are God’s people. Once you received no mercy; now you have received God’s mercy.” Heavenly Father makes it clear that we are to present ourselves in such a way that our appearance matches our identity. He accepts us as we are, but He’s also happy when we look our best, and He wants us to have the best. Our mission should not be to glorify the flesh, but to glorify God in all that we do. We are commanded to show others the goodness of God. As God’s daughters, the world’s standard should not be dictating how we dress when it comes to pleasing God with our appearance. We should be leaning on the Spirit, and our hearts should be sensitive enough to perceive the Spirit’s conviction when we’re not on point.

In the Old Testament, when God established His tabernacle on earth, He set apart a high priest. This high priest was designated and responsible for bringing the people’s sins before the Lord, he would seek God’s forgiveness on their behalf. The Old Testament outlines how very specific God is about the details, and they had to be followed to the letter, or else the priest would die instantly. God’s instructions specified the duties, requirements, and even the clothing for the priest, right down to the colors of purple, scarlet, and blue. The artisans had to be skilled and they had to capture the majesty that God specifically wanted to be conveyed. The message is clear that how we represent ourselves to the world means something to God, therefore, it ought to mean something to us as well.

At the end of the day, we are all going to do what we want, and we wear what we feel is right for us, but we have to ask ourselves which do we want to be the focus, our Godliness or how our outfit accentuates our curves. Can we have it both ways? 2 Corinthians 5:10(ESV) tells us, “For we must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ, so that each one may receive what is due for what he has done in the body, whether good or evil.” We’re on the earth for just a little while, and we need to make it count towards the purpose for which God has assigned. If something isn’t going to help us achieve the goals and rewards of Godly living, what’s the point?

All of us want a blessing from Heavenly Father. And in our preparation of receiving one of His treasures, we must consider the reality that everything that looks like a blessing isn’t one. Sometimes it is a trick from satan to swindle us out of the real blessing that God has for us. We shouldn’t want to cast our poles in a big pond and hook the wrong fish. By the same token, we, ourselves, shouldn’t want to look like a trick rather than looking like the Proverbs 18:22 treasure God desires us to be. We must not be deceived, the enemy wants to kill, steal, and destroy God’s people, and he looks for an opening in our lives. And yes, sometimes it can be a worldly habit or pattern of behavior that we continually indulge that causes the doors to our lives to swing open, giving satan the opportunity to pounce and devour. We can be smarter than this, and we should.

The times have indeed changed, but God never changes, neither does His Word or His standards. God warns us in Philippians 2:3(NLT), “Don’t be selfish; don’t try to impress others. Be humble, thinking of others as better than yourselves.” There’s nothing wrong with being sharp as all get out, and having that hair and makeup game tight, but not to the point where humility has taken a backseat, and others can’t perceive God’s grace because of the noise of our appearance. No matter where we go or what we do, our appearance and how we dress makes a statement. We would do well to make sure that it’s a statement that magnifies the goodness, purity, and holiness of God. ■

English Standard Version (ESV)
The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. ESV® Text Edition: 2016. Copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers.

Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

“Looking Like A Trick Or A Blessing”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2022. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

August 15, 2022