Find A Christian Man

Tag: Spiritual Encouragement for Christian Singles

  • Let Your Love for God Be Genuine

    Let Your Love for God Be Genuine

    After reminiscing one day about a past relationship with one of my sisters in Christ, she phoned me with a question. “Kim, you said something the other day that I don’t quite understand. You said that I should never give a man that I’m dating husband privileges.” She told me that this was the way she had always approached relationships, and it is what she’s seen from other women as well. We’re living in a completely different day and time. Choosing the wrong man can literally destroy your life because the wrong man is sent to put a wedge between you and our relationship with Heavenly Father. So, I conveyed to her the wisdom of Ephesians 5:25(NKJV), “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her.” Only a man sent by God can love a woman that way, so if God hasn’t given us the greenlight that the man we’re dealing with is the one that He sent, we need to press the pause button.

    Keep your heart

    Proverbs 4:23(NKJV) tells us to, “Keep your heart with all diligence, for out of it spring the issues of life.” Whether we know it or not, our hearts belong to God. In truth, all that we are belongs to Him. In Proverbs 4:23, He is teaching us to be good stewards of our hearts, because our hearts determine the issues of life. Our Heavenly Father is not going to throw out all the bad stuff in our hearts, He tells us to do this. He’s given us free-will to make our own choices and decisions, and the very best thing we can do for ourselves is to do some housekeeping when it comes to our own hearts.

    We are the keepers of our own hearts. God warns us to steward them well. This means we must do our due diligence in making sure our hearts are filled with God’s love, because that is what’s most important to Him. A heart that pleases God is one where our love for Him is above our love for all others and everything else. He deserves this place of honor and much more because He is our Creator, and He gave His only begotten Son to rescue us from sin and darkness.

    In 1Samuel 16:7(NLT), God said to His prophet, Samuel, “Don’t judge by his appearance or height, for I have rejected him. The LORD doesn’t see things the way you see them. People judge by outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart.” No human being can know what is in another’s heart, but God knows all our hearts. He knows who and what we value most because He can investigate our hearts and see this. He also knows that our actions will follow what we value. We get up every morning and go to work because we value the paycheck and believe it improves the quality of our lives. We read and study God’s Word because we value the knowledge it gives us. We pray to God because we value God’s love and power and believe in His willingness to help us. Everything we do in life reflects what we value in our hearts, and to please God and keep them according to His standard, we must make sure our hearts are filled with His love.

    The treasure in your heart

    Jesus Christ said in Matthew 6:20-21(NLT), “20 Store your treasures in heaven, where moths and rust cannot destroy, and thieves do not break in and steal. 21Wherever your treasure is, there the desires of your heart will also be.” This passage prompts us to examine what we are treasuring in our hearts. Some of us want to have a man so badly that we are willing to do just about anything to keep him. We assume this mindset because we have placed a high value on having a man. So, when God looks at our hearts, that’s what He sees. He sees that we are willing to disobey Him and obey the evil one who tempts us to sin through the man. Jesus Christ said in Matthew 6:19 that if our treasure is laid up in keeping the man through sin, the thief, who is the devil, will break that relationship and steal the joy of it away from us.

    2Chronicles 16:9(NLT) says, “The eyes of the LORD search the whole earth in order to strengthen those whose hearts are fully committed to him.” God is looking for hearts that are fully committed to Him. We don’t have to be perfect, but our love for God must be untainted. Some might call you old fashioned for taking a Godly approach, but we should never allow the words of others to hinder us from standing on God’s Word.

    The Lord knows our needs and desires. He knows us better than we could ever know ourselves, and He knows when and how to bless us. This includes the blessing of a man that He sends to walk with us through life. Understand that God is looking at your heart. Please be sure your love for Him is genuine, because it’s not enough to say that it is. Your love for Him will be put to the test, and you must have the patience and endurance to always choose to love God with all that you are, and you must love Him more than you love anyone else. When you do, your commitment to Him will be rewarded, and you will love the right man with the same commitment, loyalty, patience and grace that he has for you.■

    Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

    “Let Your Love for God Be Genuine”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2025. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

  • Lord, Just Send Me the Man

    Lord, Just Send Me the Man

    Our Lord was journeying through Samaria when he came upon the woman at the well. Like many other women living during that time, she was there to draw water for her family. Jesus asked her for a drink of water, and she was dumbfounded that he did this. Samaritans notoriously hated Jewish people, and the feeling was quite mutual. The Jews thought that Samaritans were ceremonially unclean, and they wouldn’t be caught speaking to one of them. This is why she was surprised that Jesus, a Jew, would speak to her. Before meeting him at the well, she hadn’t realized that God had a purpose for her life, and that over two thousand years later, people would still be reading about how Jesus Christ transformed her.

    Initially, the woman at the well didn’t recognize the Messiah. She didn’t understand that he could give her life ever more. This is an issue with many Christian women today. Our lives do not reflect that we truly recognize exactly who our Lord and Savior is. Some believers have been hearing about the Messiah for years, and even claim to know him, but when God looks at them, their hearts do not reflect that they are excited about Christ at all. Jesus Christ is our glorious King! God has placed him at His right hand and given him everlasting glory. Every knee will one day bow at his name. The woman at the well didn’t know who he was, but those of us living in these modern times have no excuse.

    In John 4:10-14(NLT), Jesus said to the woman at the well, “10 If you only knew the gift God has for you and who you are speaking to, you would ask me, and I would give you living water.” 11 “But sir, you don’t have a rope or a bucket,” she said, “and this well is very deep. Where would you get this living water? 12 And besides, do you think you’re greater than our ancestor Jacob, who gave us this well? How can you offer better water than he and his sons and his animals enjoyed?” 13 Jesus replied, “Anyone who drinks this water will soon become thirsty again.14 But those who drink the water I give will never be thirsty again. It becomes a fresh, bubbling spring within them, giving them eternal life.”

    The offer of living water that our Savior made was one she had never heard before. No one alive during those times had a mind to fathom giving such a gift and receiving it would be equally fantastical. It was so out-of-the-box that at first, she couldn’t conceive of it. Immediately she supposed that such water was deeper than the water she had fetched every day, and surely no one ill-prepared and without proper tools of rope and bucket could reach it.

    When Jesus told her in John 4:26, “I am the Messiah,” everything for her changed. Millions since then have heard this same story. Knowing Christ, making him Lord over our lives, letting his love into our hearts, and believing in God’s resurrection power has transferred us from death to life evermore. The Spirit of Christ is living in us because of the accomplished work of Christ, and because of our Redeemer, we can live a life that is more than abundant. How is it that we can be more excited about the prospect of meeting a man than we are about the reality of Jesus Christ and the salvation he’s offered us?

    If we’re honest with ourselves, some of us would have to admit that we’re willing to do way more to get the man and maintain that relationship than we are to maintain our relationship with God through Jesus Christ. The attitude behind this is, “Lord, just send me the man.” Colossians 2:10(NLT) tells us, “So you also are complete through your union with Christ, who is the head over every ruler and authority.” Through Jesus Christ we are complete, lacking nothing! Still, so many of us have convinced ourselves that there is a void in our lives. We should note that the Samaritan woman had in her past five husbands, and yet, when she met Jesus, she was broken, wounded, and sad. We can have a man so fine, so charming, so honorable and sweet, but if the love of Christ is not firmly anchored in our hearts, we will not have a strong foundation, and therefore, our relationships won’t have a strong foundation either.

    The Samaritan woman said to Jesus in John 4:15(NLT), “Please, sir, give me this water! Then I’ll never be thirsty again, and I won’t have to come here to get water.” This was a simple truth and she understood it. She understood that living water would cancel thirst. As a single woman, you must examine whether you believe this in your own heart. The living water that Jesus Christ gives to all who desire him will cancel thirst forever more. This should be every single woman’s testimony, today and every day. If you have not allowed Jesus Christ to fill your cup, and you feel there’s a void in your life, that void is not the absence of a husband. You have not allowed your whole heart to be overflowing with the love of Jesus Christ. This is something you can and should change.

    Because we are in Christ, we don’t have to continue going back to the well for water. Through him, we are filled to overflowing. This is our reality as God’s daughters, but if our hearts and minds are not lining up with the fullness we have received in Christ, we need to get into God’s Word. Ephesians 3:17 tells us that we must do the things that make Christ at home in our hearts and build our trust in him. When we do this, our roots will grow down into God’s love and keep us strong. We must make this a priority so that our faith in God is where it needs to be, and our desire for marriage doesn’t outweigh our commitment to God through Jesus Christ.■

    Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

    “Lord, Just Send Me the Man”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2024. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

  • Give God the Best of You

    Give God the Best of You

    It’s no secret that there are many single women praying to God to bless them with a good man. And it’s not just to date someone or have a companion, but they are praying for the man they’ll spend the rest of their lives with. This desire makes sense. There’s something within the heart of a woman that yearns to share an intimate connection with a man, and it’s God’s provision that satisfies this yearning. Psalm 37:4 tells us to delight ourselves in the Lord, and He will give us the desires of our hearts. If we study this verse a little deeper, we’ll discover that God is the One that places these Godly desires in our hearts. He has woven them within our DNA, so we’re built this way. God would not place a desire in our hearts and then refuse to satisfy it. That wouldn’t make sense, and our God is too brilliant and perfect to do something nonsensical. We’ve got to recognize that we’re at a place and season in our lives where we need to stop thinking that God is withholding this blessing from us. It’s time for us to get on board with His plan.

    Isaiah 43:1(ESV) tells us, “But now thus says the Lord, he who created you, O Jacob, he who formed you, O Israel: “Fear not, for I have redeemed you; I have called you by name, you are mine.” We belong to God, lock, stock and barrel. Every ounce of us is His, and through His unparalleled mercy and grace, He has redeemed us through our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. Psalm 84:11 tells us that God is our sun and shield. The sun is the source of all our energy, and God is telling us that He is our life-giving Source, and He is also our shield. He tells us in this verse that He will not withhold any good thing from those who love and honor Him.

    God wants us to be blessed infinitely more than we can want it for ourselves. This is a truth that must be firmly anchored in our minds and hearts. God’s goodness and His willingness and ability to bless us is the basis of our faith. He would never withhold the blessing of marriage, and we must be clear on this. However, the truth is that many of us are not as clear on it as we should be. We’re not seeing results because our faith isn’t firmly anchored in the reality of God’s goodness and truth. Many of us will say that we’re backing our faith, but our history shows that as soon as we have the man in our lives, we shortchange God. We become too comfortable and our commitment to God wanes. That’s not a solid foundation of faith.

    God is the Giver of our desires and He alone fulfills them, but make no mistake, faith is required. That’s nonnegotiable. When we allow the desire to get ahead of the Giver, we hold on so tightly to the man that we squeeze God completely out of the equation. This should not be, and we know this, but many of us still haven’t broken this pattern. God must come first, and He should hold the number one spot in our hearts above anyone or anything else.

    True faith is unshakable faith. It’s believing that is fully persuaded, and a true demonstration of it means that our behavior, response, obedience and commitment to God will not waver just because someone new enters the picture. We must remember that Jesus Christ is Lord, and our lives must follow his example. He always did the Will of God, and this should be our motivation too. In John 10:14-15(ESV), he said, “I am the good shepherd. I know my own and my own know me, just as the Father knows me and I know the Father; and I lay down my life for the sheep.” God gave Jesus Christ a mission and sent him to earth to fulfill it. Jesus Christ never wavered. He endured the kind of suffering that no human being could endure, and he died an agonizing, horrible, and humiliating death on the cross. He did this for us, and every day our lives must demonstrate that we understand and are eternally grateful for the victory from sin and death that he won for us.

    God loves us more than we can fathom. His love is so great for us that it will take us an eternity to live it out. He is always helping us, but He will not overstep His laws. He expects that we will hear and obey His Word. Through the Apostle Paul, He tells us 1Timothy 1:4-5 not to pay attention to fables and myths, because these will not build us up in faith. These are tricks of the enemy to keep us from moving forward in the promises of God. Instead, God tells us to get on board with His plan for our lives so we can love from a pure heart, a good conscience, and sincere faith.

    God also tells us that many have strayed from this, and it’s one of the reasons the world is in the shape it is today. Keeping it real, many women have reached a level of obsession when it comes to having a man in their lives. That desire drives just about everything for them. And when they think they’ve met him, they’ll give that man their best—their emotions, their bodies, and their hearts, but they won’t do that for God. To try to shortchange God in that way is a recipe for disaster. He tells us in Romans 12:1 to present our bodies, and everything in them, to Him as a living and holy sacrifice. So, if we want to have what God wants to give us, we must do things His way. Our hearts must belong to God, and we must back our faith by giving Him our very best, because this is the way to show Him that He’s number One in our lives. ■

    English Standard Version (ESV)
    The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. ESV® Text Edition: 2016. Copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers.

    “Give God the Best of You”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2024. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

  • Am I Trying to Please Man?

    Am I Trying to Please Man?

    “For do I now persuade men, or God? Or do I seek to please men? For if I still pleased men, I would not be a bondservant of Christ.”

    Galatians 1:10(NKJV)

    I was engaged to be married for three months and my fiancé was a born-again believer and loved the Lord. While we dated, I witnessed him pray, and he often spoke of his relationship with God. Because of this, I believed that he was a spiritually mature man, and I had confidence that we were both ready and destined to marry. I had prayed for years to meet the right man. This was extremely important to me, because in my past, I had hurtful and failed relationships with men that weren’t the right fit for my life. I felt that I had stalled in my quest to be married, and when I met my fiancé, I felt that I had met someone that made up for all the hiccups and mistakes of the past. I was wrong.

    The disappointment of meeting someone, falling for them, and then they turn out to be the opposite of what you thought is not new to many women. You think you know him, but nothing prepares you for the negative behaviors that come out when he’s no longer concerned with impressing you. Not all men are like this, but when we’re not as close to God as He’d like us to be, we can fall for the one who mirrors the intimacy we’ve lost with God.

    Heaven is our home because it is the place where our Creator lives. Heaven and all its host are continually and constantly responding to the goodness of God with faith and gratitude. The purpose of everything that goes on there is to give glory to God. Anyone or anything that is glorious deserves glory, and there is none more glorious than our Heavenly Father. The purpose of our lives on earth is to continually and constantly respond to God with faith and gratitude. This is life in the Spirit!

    The salvation that God has given us through Jesus Christ is a gift from Him. We’re not ungrateful people who are too selfish and rude to say, “thank you”, we’re God’s kids! We’re the people He set apart to be His very own, and He commands us to behave like we know it and imitate Him in all that we do. In the light of His unspeakable gift to us, our lives are primed and ready to display excellence, because Christ is in us. We’re to exhibit divine character, like our Master Jesus. Romans 5:2 tells us that because of our faith, Christ has brought us to a place of highest and underserved privilege where we now actually share in God’s glory. Ephesians 1:3 declares that God has blessed us with every spiritual blessing because of our union with Christ. He’s given us the gift of Holy Spirit to dwell within us and to help us live powerfully in Christ.

    God has guarded us from being ineffective and barren, because He’s given us the knowledge of Christ and equipped us with everything that we need to live through him. With all the wealth He’s given, 2Peter 1:5-8(NLT) says, “In view of all this, make every effort to respond to God’s promises. Supplement your faith with a generous provision of moral excellence, and moral excellence with knowledge, 6 and knowledge with self-control, and self-control with patient endurance, and patient endurance with godliness, 7 and godliness with brotherly affection, and brotherly affection with love for everyone. 8 The more you grow like this, the more productive and useful you will be in your knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ.” The blessings and goodness of God deserve a response from us, and just any ol response won’t do.

    When it comes to the significant relationship we desire, many of us position our expectations ahead of our spiritual responsibility to God. When Adam and Eve fell from the position God had given them, they were disconnected from Him spiritually. They lost everything. The only way to be whole again is for the attachment and connection to God to be restored, and this is what Christ did for us. To bask in all that God has in store for our lives, our relationship with Him must be maintained by remembering the sacrifice of Christ and clinging to Him through a continual response of faith and gratitude.

    The understanding of intimacy and connection to a man and the pursuit of it should never supersede our desire and pursuit of intimacy with God. If at any time it does, whether we’ve been dating the same guy for two years, we’re engaged, or even married, our failure to respond to the goodness of God will allow the devil the opening he seeks to destroy our unions. So that epic question, “am I trying to please man?” is one that draws a line in the sand about who exactly we’re honoring, worshiping, and adoring.

    If your expectation for longevity, respect, unity and love in your relationship with a man is unmet by an intense commitment to God, the man will mirror this imbalance before you, no matter who he is. He will show you that your devotion is not ‘God first’, therefore it is imbalanced and without spiritual discernment. Relationships, more than any other circumstance of life, profoundly teach us that we are not in control. We cannot make the man love us and want to be with us. We should never be under the delusion that it’s our womanly charms or flesh that keeps him near. Only God’s love has the power to bind and keep us unified, and we must settle this in our minds and hearts.

    God tells us in Proverbs 4:23 to guard our hearts because from them spring the issues of life. So, when a man begins to mirror the lack of intimacy in our relationship with God, and we then continue without response to our Heavenly Father, our expectations in our marriages and significant relationship can go unmet. The love of Christ is the foundation upon which our love for others will flourish and grow. So, we must obey the commandment of Christ in Mark 12:30 to love God with all our heart, mind, soul, and strength. When this is demonstrated in everything you do, the right man will join in communion with our commitment to honor God with all that you are, and he will mirror that honor for you and your union with him.■

    Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

    Scripture taken from the New King James Version. Copyright © 1982 by Thomas Nelson, Inc. Used by permission. All rights reserved.

    “Am I Trying to Please Man?”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2024. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

  • If You Will Allow It

    If You Will Allow It

    If we stuck to God’s Word and allowed it to lead, guide, and direct us when it comes to relationships that lead to marriage, every woman today that desires a husband would have one. We should never think that there aren’t enough men to go around for Godly women. That could never be true because our God deals in the exceedingly abundantly. Blessings continually flow from heaven and do so unendingly. Our Heavenly Father took care of our needs before any of us were born. You can have every confidence that there’s someone in this world that was born around the same time you were that will be just as thankful to have you in his life as you will be to be a part of his life. The distance between you and your future husband is always about your faith and what you’re doing to back it.

    Ephesians 3:20-21(ESV) says, “Now to him who is able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think, according to the power at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, forever and ever. Amen.” God has already proven to us, and to everything else He has created, that He is able to do the exceedingly abundantly. He has established the incomparable and unyielding nature of His power and put a period behind it. We sometimes forget this.

    When people witness God’s power in their lives in a mighty way, many of them will think that He moved just in the nick of time in their personal circumstances. In reality, He knew about the situation ions ago, and settled it long before we came to be. Our mode of thinking and praying must get in gear with the all-knowing, all-powerful, sovereignty of His being. God knows the end at the beginning and the beginning at the end. He set the solution to all our problems in motion before even our great, great, great grandparents were born.

    Genesis 2:3(ESV) says, “So God blessed the seventh day and made it holy, because on it God rested from all his work that he had done in creation.” God rested! He has already completed the ‘far more abundantly than all we can ask or think’ of Ephesians 3:20, and He completed it through Jesus Christ. John 1:1-4(ESV) tells us, “1 In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. 2 He was in the beginning with God. 3 All things were made through him, and without him was not any thing made that was made. 4 In him was life, and the life was the light of men.” The “Word” in this passage is referring to Jesus Christ, the living Word of God. He was with God in the beginning and all things were made through him. God isn’t making things up as we move along. Our Heavenly Father’s plan for the universe was finished when He rested. It’s a done deal, and we must make room in our understanding for this in order to move in the power and authority of Christ. God said in Hebrews 4:3(NLT), “For only we who believe can enter his rest. As for the others, God said, “In my anger I took an oath:
    ‘They will never enter my place of rest,’” even though this rest has been ready since he made the world.”

    There is nowhere in the Bible where anyone will find that God has left the state of rest He entered into and told us about in Genesis 2:3. In truth, the rest He entered is so profound that He commanded us to make that day of His rest holy and remember it forever. So, God is still in His state of rest, and He invites all those that love, honor, and obey Him through Jesus Christ to enter into His rest.

    God is brilliant beyond brilliance, magnificent beyond magnificence, and powerful beyond power. He has given us His Word, and His Word is His Will. God has already moved. He made Christ our Savior long before Adam and Eve were created or ever sinned. There’s nothing that is a surprise to Him, and He tells us in Proverbs 19:21 that we can make many plans, but His purpose will forever prevail. God’s Will and Word was established before He created humans. Again, He has already miraculously, prophetically, and meticulously moved, and He commands us to step into His unchangeable and perfect Will. He has created the universe in such a way that once we have aligned our will with His Will, everything around us will cooperate with us and we will see His Will come to pass in our lives.

    If you know this, then you will read Ephesians 3:20 with amazing clarity about your power and authority in Christ. You will understand that God has moved, it’s our turn. We are the ones with dominion and authority in the earth, and He commands us to stand in it through Christ Jesus, our Lord.

    God has done the exceedingly abundantly, and if we allow it, the exceedingly abundantly will show up in an amazing way in our lives. The condition of witnessing the exceedingly abundantly of Ephesians 3:20 is in this same verse. He tells us that we will witness the exceedingly abundantly “according to the power at work within us.” This means that as we think about the future spouse, and as we ponder the who, what, how, and when, we need to look in the mirror and ask, “Am I allowing the power of the Holy Spirit to be at work within me?” And if you answer, “yes”, the next question is what have you done that testifies this is so? 1Corinthians 4:20(NLT) declares, “For the Kingdom of God is not just a lot of talk; it is living by God’s power.” So, the power that works in us isn’t just a lot of talk. It’s about the tangible evidence of your faith.

    It’s about what you are doing right now to back your faith in God regarding what you are expecting Him to fulfill. You see, our Heavenly Father has a different idea about our potential than we do. He knows what He’s given us in Christ and tells us in Philippians 4:13 that we can do all things through Jesus Christ who gives us strength. He tells us that when we ask Him for a blessing beyond the ones we’re currently enjoying, we should get busy thanking Him for it before it even arrives.

    Jesus Christ said in Matthew 16:19(NLT), “And I will give you the keys of the Kingdom of Heaven. Whatever you forbid on earth will be forbidden in heaven, and whatever you permit on earth will be permitted in heaven.” We’re the ones with the keys, and we decide what we will or will not allow in our lives. This is up to us. We can lock ourselves out of blessings or open the door to them. If the latter is our choice, then we must do as so many others have done in God’s Word. We must back our faith by demonstrating to God how thankful we are to be saved and filled with His Holy Spirit. The way to thank Him has not changed. It’s not to focus on what we don’t have, but to focus on what we do have in Christ. We must use the authority and power of Christ to demonstrate our love for God by growing in His Word and doing the good works He has commanded us to do in the lives of others.■

    Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

    English Standard Version (ESV), The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. ESV® Text Edition: 2016. Copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers.

    “If You Will Allow It”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2024. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

  • They Instead Became Fools

    They Instead Became Fools

    Romans 1:20-22(NLT)
    “20 For ever since the world was created, people have seen the earth and sky. Through everything God made, they can clearly see his invisible qualities—his eternal power and divine nature. So they have no excuse for not knowing God.  21 Yes, they knew God, but they wouldn’t worship him as God or even give him thanks. And they began to think up foolish ideas of what God was like. As a result, their minds became dark and confused. 22 Claiming to be wise, they instead became utter fools.”

    Pure joy. That’s how Carolyn felt after her first date with Marvin. They’d met each other through a mutual friend and after talking on the phone a couple of weeks, they decided to meet up. Carolyn was all in after that. She had butterflies at even the thought of being in his company. Never wanting to seem overzealous, she tried to be patient and allow the relationship to slowly develop, but that quickly went out the window. It had been two years since she last dated, and since Marvin seemed to be as smitten with her as she was with him, they both jumped in.

    Marvin is a single dad with two teenage boys that he absolutely adores. They came to live with him after their mother remarried. Carolyn was an only child with no children of her own, but she always believed she’d be a good mother. They had been dating over six months and everyone she knew was excited because Carolyn was happier than they had ever seen her. She had never known a more loving man than Marvin, but as their relationship settled a little more, his deep devotion to his boys became more apparent. He had been upfront with her about a commitment he had made to them, and Carolyn knew that he would only bring the woman he dated around them if he was confident it was long term.

    As she thought about her few brief encounters with Marvin’s sons over the last several months, Carolyn began to feel insecure about her relationship with Marvin. She’s so afraid of rocking the boat that she won’t ask him why he continues to keep distance between her and his sons. Could it be that although he cares for her, he’s seen qualities that make him question if she can really be the mother that he believes his sons deserve?

    God tells us in Romans 8:28(NLT), “And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them.” As single women, we would be well suited to allow the heft of what God is telling us in this verse to marinate for a while. You see, God is not a stranger to anyone. Romans 1:20-21 makes it clear that people see His wondrous creation every day. They breath His air and bask under His sun. We can’t get it twisted. It’s God who makes everything come together, and the evidence of His wondrous power is the effortless quality of how He works. All you and I have to do is sit back and watch God.

    Proverbs 19:21 reminds us that we can make many plans, but God’s purpose will prevail.  When His anointing flows in a situation, for us, it’s like He’s parted the Red Sea and all we have to do is walk through. That’s what He does when we honor Him and seek Him first in all things, but some of us become so excited about meeting someone new, that we leave God and His wisdom out of the equation. Unlike the folks whose minds become dark and confused, as believers that are fully persuaded in God’s power and love, we should never question or be confused about His brilliance and attention to details. We shouldn’t take anything for granted when it comes to our walk with Christ, and we should be confident that when God does the exceedingly abundantly in our lives, He doesn’t miss a beat.

    Romans 1:23-25(NLT) goes on to tell us, “23 And instead of worshiping the glorious, ever-living God, they worshiped idols made to look like mere people and birds and animals and reptiles. 24 So God abandoned them to do whatever shameful things their hearts desired. As a result, they did vile and degrading things with each other’s bodies. 25 They traded the truth about God for a lie. So they worshiped and served the things God created instead of the Creator himself, who is worthy of eternal praise! Amen.”

    When a woman is so afraid of losing a man that she will not ask him questions that are extremely important to her, it tells you a lot about her priorities. It’s possible that she’s more interested in her standing in that relationship than she is in her standing in Christ. Some of us make a lot of compromises in our significant relationships with men, and some of them are an offense to our relationship with God through Jesus Christ. We must be careful that we’re not worshiping people and things instead of worshiping our Creator in spirit and truth. If there’s any hint of this in our lives, we must repent.

    As believers in the Lord Jesus Christ, we have an enemy, the devil, and he would like nothing more than to make a fool of us. Don’t trade your rights and privileges in Christ for quick pleasure. Just because it looks right doesn’t always mean it is right for you. Society has made relationships of today very challenging, and we must be careful that we are partnering with a man that God has ordained for us. He’s the One with the plan, and we need to leave all the details to Him and make doubly sure that we’re hearing His directives. We can rest assured that when God’s hand is in it, things work together according to His purpose. You’ll experience the liberty and peace of Christ in yourself and in your significant relationship as you both welcome each other into one another’s lives.■

    Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

    Scripture taken from The Message. Copyright ©1993, 1994, 1995, 1996, 2000, 2001, 2002. Used by permission of NavPress Publishing Group.

    “They Instead Became Fools”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2024. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

  • We Can’t Rush God

    We Can’t Rush God

    Society has taught us many things, and one of them is to expect results immediately. If it seems to us that a process is delayed, we use every available resource at our disposal to speed it up. Our modern society has almost no tolerance for the reality of patience, and if people don’t receive results quickly, impatience gets the best of them. That’s when we see the worst side of human behavior. We see attitudes that our Heavenly Father commands us not to have, the ones where we try to rush people and circumstances to give us what we want. Many of us make the mistake of trying to bring these ‘in a rush’ attitudes and behaviors into our prayers and expectations regarding marriage. We want results from Heavenly Father on the double, and we want to know exactly what we can do to speed things along.

    Philippians 4:6(NLT) tell us, “Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done.” This verse conveys the action steps of believing and trusting God in a way that pleases Him. We’re not to worry, and many of us view this one as a tall order. With some of us, we are more committed to worrying than we are in having faith. A brother or sister in Christ can encourage us until the cows come home, but our minds are fixed on what we perceive as reality, and we will not allow ourselves to be encouraged in the strength and power of God. Instead, we worry about the things we’ve prayed to receive. We become increasingly anxious because we understand that the timing of the results isn’t under our control. Timing is a matter of waiting on God. It’s a crucial aspect of patience, and patience is a fruit our Heavenly Father requires us to produce.

    Philippians 4:6 also tells us to pray about everything and tell God what we need. This part we’ve got on lock. We know how to pray and ask God for what we want, but the wait is the part that triggers all kinds of emotions and doubts. The wait is the part that trips us up. We’re begging the Father to tell us what we can do to take the fruition of our status-change off the waiting list. Well, He hasn’t kept this a secret from us, but it’s possible we haven’t been paying attention.

    Examine yourself
    There’s no doubt about it, God has already told us what to do in His Word, but sometimes we need a refresher course of the basics of faith. James 2:26(NLT) tells us, “Just as the body is dead without breath, so also faith is dead without good works.” Faith is inactive without doing the Christ-like things that make it lively. We kinda forget this as we’re trying to amp up our believing.

    2Corinthians 13:5-6 The Message (MSG) challenges us, “Test yourselves to make sure you are solid in the faith. Don’t drift along taking everything for granted. Give yourselves regular checkups. You need firsthand evidence, not mere hearsay, that Jesus Christ is in you. Test it out. If you fail the test, do something about it.” The rubber meets the road in this verse. The one thing that we do not want our Heavenly Father to tell us on judgment day is that we were too arrogant to test ourselves. We don’t want to hear Him say that we were coasting along, stuck in our own patterns and conditions, and we refused to learn more and do more for His Kingdom.

    Too focused on the wrong groom
    The marketplace is flooded with accurate teachings on God’s Word. We can research any subject covered in the Bible online and sharpen ourselves in the Word to such a degree that we could be leaps and bounds ahead of where we are. Many of us don’t do this. We’re missing the very Word that will profoundly connect us to our purpose. Yet we’re expecting God to bypass the fact that we refuse to take the test. We want Him to overlook the reality that we haven’t done anything about the test we keep failing.

    Whether it’s our past or our present, some of us are so focused on a mortal man to bring us to the precipice of joy that the bliss over the return of the True Bridegroom is nowhere in our hearts. We have allowed our desire for marriage to get us caught up in the flesh. Even today, while we are praying and asking the Father to position us to meet the right man, our pasts echo the times that we compromised our love and allegiance for Christ with the wrong man repeatedly and never truly repented for it. This is not just about physical intimacy, but the many other ways we compromised as well. In past relationships, we did everything possible to spend quality time with the man but did nothing to spend quality time with Jesus. We took time off work sometimes to enjoy a day canoodling with the man but won’t read the Bible every day. Things like this reveal our heart towards God, and we can’t afford to dismiss it.

    In so many instances, we’ve chosen the man over Jesus Christ, our beloved Bridegroom. Understand, it’s that one compromise against Christ—the One who rescued us from darkness, delivered us from evil, and brought us to new life—that puts us in the same category as Eve. For many women, this rebellion against Godliness is in their hearts today, and it is the thing that keeps the blessing of a husband at bay. In Colossians 1:13-14(NLT), God tells us, “13 For he has rescued us from the kingdom of darkness and transferred us into the Kingdom of his dear Son, 14 who purchased our freedom and forgave our sins.”  Philippians 2:9-11(NLT) says that God has elevated Jesus Christ to the place of highest honor and “gave him the name above all other names, 10 that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, 11 and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.”

    Jesus Christ is our King! And we have not always behaved as if we know this. We must repent from our past behavior of not honoring him with our whole hearts and whole minds. Many of us chose to bow to the wrong man in the past, a man that was not the one God ordained. So, rather than bringing a mentality of impatience to the forefront or trying to rush a prayer through, we need to take care of a little housecleaning. We must make sure that this behavior of compromising our love for Jesus Christ is completely out of hearts. When it is, our Bridegroom, our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, will find us with hearts that are ready to greet him when he returns. ■

    Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

    Scripture taken from The Message. Copyright ©1993, 1994, 1995, 1996, 2000, 2001, 2002. Used by permission of NavPress Publishing Group.

    “We Can’t Rush God”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2024. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

  • The Mountain Called ‘Being Single’

    The Mountain Called ‘Being Single’

    Matthew 17:20(NLT)
    “You don’t have enough faith,” Jesus told them. “I tell you the truth, if you had faith even as small as a mustard seed, you could say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there,’ and it would move. Nothing would be impossible.”

    In front of her friends, Ruby puts on a very confident face, insisting that her faith is fully persuaded when it comes to marriage. She’s forever claiming and confessing it whenever the subject comes up, but the reality is that she hides her frustration and sadness about the wait from others. She wants her friends to think she has the faith to move that mountain called ‘being single’, but her circumstances paint a different outcome, and she feels hopeless. Ruby really doesn’t believe the words and confessions she’s speaking. For the last seven years she’s been talking about her wedding plans, but the truth is that her hopes are slowly slipping away. God doesn’t want this to happen for her, and He doesn’t want it to happen to any of us either.

    Hebrews 11:1 tells us that faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen. It is a totally persuaded and sold-out trust in God. One of the mistakes that we often make is to have more faith in the desire and reality of marriage than we do in the Giver of all good and perfect gifts. This was Ruby’s mindset. The possibility of marriage excites us all to no end, but we are nowhere near as excited about our Heavenly Father and all that He is.

    God is in control. That is a truth that none of us can fail to understand. Whether we’re married, dating, or single, faith is the confidence in knowing that God is in control. You are not in the driver’s seat of things, God is. Life will continually teach us this lesson. God requires us to rest in Him completely, without worry, fear, or anxiety. The level of faith to simply trust God for our lives translates to intimacy in our relationship with Him. Growing in Christ and knowing God through His Word is way beyond enough to keep us enthusiastic about our all-powerful, all-knowing Creator. Again, this enthusiasm should not be based on what we’re expecting to receive from Him, it should be anchored in the reality of who God is.

    Jesus Christ declared in Matthew 17:20 that we only need faith the size of a mustard seed to move a mountain. By this, he is giving us an indication of how powerful faith is. A little bit of it will yield seismic results. So, when we digest this truth, we can’t help but question the strength of our own faith. For many of us, our believing and faith has not yet produced the results we seek. So, we come away feeling disappointed and insecure that the faith we’ve held has not yet been enough to move the mountain we call ‘single’. We wonder if it will ever be, and we become so dissatisfied that we don’t want to try anymore. We shouldn’t focus on that but focus on God.

    In the Old Testament, the man, Job, had endured tremendous tribulation, and he wanted to have a conversation with God about a few things. In Job 42:2(NLT), he said to God, “I know that you can do all things; no purpose of yours can be thwarted.” This is another piece of knowledge about our Heavenly Father that ought to be deeply imbedded in our minds and hearts. Whether it is marriage or any other thing we desire in life, God’s purpose will never be prevented. Our temper tantrums, dissatisfaction, and upsets about the wait isn’t going to do us any good. God is the One with the plan for our lives, and rather than getting depressed about the mountain not budging, we need to be about building our faith in the omnipotence, love, and goodness of our God.

    Hebrews 11:6(NIV) says, “And without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him.” This verse is not referring to faith in the blessings we desire. It’s talking about the kind of faith in God that increases the intimacy in our relationship with Him. Our relationship with God is built on trusting Him, regardless of our conditions and circumstances. It’s not about us getting what we want, it’s about giving God all that we are.

    It’s impossible to please our Heavenly Father without the level of faith in Him that builds intimacy. Because we haven’t exhibited it in the past, but instead have been solely focused on marriage, we haven’t pleased God to the extent that He deserves. Every believer must make a shift in their minds and hearts, so that life becomes solely about God and our relationship with Him. The closeness we share with our Creator is what pleases Him, and when this is our great desire, the increase of faith becomes a very natural occurrence, and so does God’s rewards.

    So many of us want to get married because we can’t wait to give our hearts to the man. When we meet him, guaranteed, we’re going to place our confidence in him without much effort at all. We want this so much because we desire deep connection and intimacy in the relationship with our future spouse. However, many of us haven’t surrendered ourselves to God to a level that exceeds what we’re so willing to surrender to someone else. We haven’t engaged the intimacy that God requires, but we are very willing to give it to a mere mortal.

    In all those seven years, Ruby didn’t realize that God was calling her to get closer to Him, to stay in His face by staying in His Word. She overlooked James 2:17-18(NLT), when he said, “17 In the same way, faith by itself, if it is not accompanied by action, is dead. 18 But someone will say, “You have faith; I have deeds.” Show me your faith without deeds, and I will show you my faith by my deeds.” We don’t have to tell God how to bless us. It’s always a matter of backing our faith by demonstrating the deeds and actions that honor Him. God’s plan for your life was finished before He laid the foundations of the world. You already have the mustard seed of faith. Let your deeds and commitment to God match it, and watch the mountain move out of your way. ■

    Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

    THE HOLY BIBLE, NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION®, NIV® Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc.® Used by Permission of Biblica, Inc.® All rights reserved worldwide.

    “The Mountain Called ‘Being Single’”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2024. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

  • A Great Relationship Done God’s Way

    A Great Relationship Done God’s Way

    2Corinthians 6:14(ESV)
    “Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. For what partnership has righteousness with lawlessness? Or what fellowship has light with darkness?”

    God tells us not to bond ourselves together with those that do not believe in Him through the Lord Jesus Christ. This means we shouldn’t emotionally invest in an individual that doesn’t want to be saved by the blood of the Lamb. After being around a person a short while, we have a pretty good idea about whether they love Jesus. When it comes to significant relationships with men, we can tell if the man has the compassion and love of Christ. In our modern times, living by 2Corinthians 6:14 has been a very challenging practice for single believers. The problem is that even when we know the man isn’t interested in loving God through the Lord Jesus Christ, many of us still allow him into our hearts.

    The term, “unequally yoked”, that is used in 2Corinthians 6:14 was very easily understood in biblical days. Many terms like this were used to teach the Gospel of Jesus Christ for that very reason. Like some of the other phases in the Bible, “unequally yoked” is one that farmers used. It describes the ineffective practice of yoking a strong oxen or farm animal with a weaker one. A yoke was a frame usually placed around the heads or necks of two animals to join them together for farm work. If they were not equal in strength, the weaker one would usually prevent the completion of the task.

    People living during the periods written about in the Bible didn’t have the luxury of grocery stores and markets. Farming was not only a way of life, but it was survival for them. Unequally yoked meant delays they couldn’t afford. So, when 2Corinthians 6:14 was taught to them centuries ago, they understood the risk of being unequally yoked, and knew it was something to avoid. As it relates to people and relationships, those of us living today are not grasping just how detrimental an unequal yoke is.

    You may ask yourself, “Is being in a relationship with someone who doesn’t love the Lord such a bad thing?” God says it is. He emphasizes the point that light cannot have a partnership with darkness, and righteousness cannot fellowship with unrighteousness. Some of us have learned the hard way that attempting to partner with darkness is extremely damaging to our lives.

    When Jesus Christ was in the wilderness being tested by satan, he responded to one of the temptations in Matthew 4:7(NKJV). He said, “It is written again, ‘You shall not tempt the LORD your God.’”  Yet, many born-again believers will fall for an unequally yoked temptation and try to test God by engaging in it. We know what He says in His Word, yet we place our spiritual lives in jeopardy because our desire to partner is greater than our desire to follow God’s Word.

    In an unequally yoked significant relationship, the one that lacks the love of God in their heart will pull the other one down. This compromise that we make with our faith is never worth it. We have to ask ourselves what’s at the bottom of our decision to take this risk. Is it that we’re tired of waiting and don’t think another man will approach us? Could it be that we haven’t surrendered this aspect of our lives to the wisdom and guidance of God, or is it that we really don’t believe that God will bless us with the one that He will send? Whatever the case may be, there are far too many of God’s children suffering from the consequence of this bad decision. We can avoid it, and we should.

    Regarding the inheritance and authority of His only begotten Son, Jesus Christ, God tells us in Ephesians 1:22(ESV) that He has “put all things under his feet and gave him as head over all things to the church.” This means that our entire lives are under the feet of Jesus Christ. The person we will date and marry is under his feet as well, and God expects us to live as though we know this. Jesus Christ is Lord! He’s Lord in every way. It’s his authority and power that should govern us and the choices we make. We can’t separate dating from Godliness. Our Heavenly Father means for us to do relationships His way, because this is the way to unity, peace, longevity, and real love. Don’t think that you can overstep God’s Word and have good results. Yield to Him, so that you’ll have a great relationship that is done His way.■

    English Standard Version (ESV)
    The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. ESV® Text Edition: 2016. Copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers.

    Scripture taken from the New King James Version. Copyright © 1982 by Thomas Nelson, Inc. Used by permission. All rights reserved.

    “A Great Relationship Done God’s Way”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2024. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

  • Unlimited Capacity to Love

    Unlimited Capacity to Love

    2Corinthians 4:9(NLT)
    “    We are hunted down, but never abandoned by God. We get knocked down, but we are not destroyed.”

    This verse is a tremendous source of comfort for any person that is in a relationship or seeking one. All of us know individuals that have gotten knocked down emotionally by someone they loved. Many of have some personal experience with this. The man we loved abandoned us, left us bewildered and injured by heartache, with no meaningful explanation. This man simply couldn’t wrap his head and heart around the blessing that we represented. He missed out, and it’s not our fault, but knowing about his negligence doesn’t do much to ease the pain. When this hurt is still fresh, we can’t imagine getting over losing the person that we loved so much, but eventually we do. Once the Lord has healed our broken heart, we say to ourselves, “I don’t want to go through anything like that ever again in my life.” That’s a common response, but we must allow for the possibility that although that’s our proclamation, it doesn’t always stick.

    Romans 5:1-5(NASB20) says, “1 Therefore, having been justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, 2 through whom we also have obtained our introduction by faith into this grace in which we stand; and we celebrate in hope of the glory of God. 3 And not only [this,] but we also celebrate in our tribulations, knowing that tribulation brings about perseverance; 4 and perseverance, proven character; and proven character, hope; 5 and hope does not disappoint, because the love of God has been poured out within our hearts through the Holy Spirit who was given to us.”

    Celebrating in the middle of tribulation is a spiritual practice that most of us have a challenging time grasping. God knows our frame, and in this passage, He tells us exactly why we can celebrate in tribulations. It’s because tribulations breed perseverance in our lives. Perseverance and endurance are required for God’s children, and through our life experience, God is teaching us to develop the same character and qualities as Jesus Christ. It’s our choice to make these changes. God will not force us.

    If we have given our lives to Christ, then we must go to God’s Word, which tells us His expectations for our behavior, thoughts, and actions. 3John 1:11(NLT) says, “Beloved, do not imitate what is evil, but what is good. He who does good is of God, but he who does evil has not seen God.” Keeping this in mind, Ephesians 5:1(NLT) instructs, “Imitate God, therefore, in everything you do, because you are his dear children.” Imitating God is the goal of our existences. This is why perseverance and endurance are required for God’s children. He perseveres, and therefore, we must too. It’s not something any of us can negotiate a take it or leave it deal. We must have it because it proves our character as one belonging to God. Endurance and perseverance are the stickability that causes us to remain grounded in faith no matter what comes our way.

    Sometimes, we fall for the wrong guy. That’s just the truth of it. Maybe we didn’t invite God into our choices. Maybe we leaped before checking in with Him, and maybe we jumped in heart first even after we heard from Him. Whatever the case, we must endure and do so with faith in our hearts.  No matter who you are, if you’ve ever truly loved a person, you made yourself vulnerable to them. They may not have handled your heart with the care that God requires, and it led to you experiencing pain, but after the swelling goes down, you’re still here. This lets you know that through Jesus Christ, you’re much stronger than you thought you were.

    1Corinthians 13:7(NLT) tells us, “Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.” Verse 8 tells us that love cannot fail but will last forever. This is who God is and it is who we are too because of our union with Christ. So, one of the lessons we must learn from our broken hearts is that love does not fail, even if we do. Because of the love of Christ, we have an unlimited capacity to love. We can fall and get back up again, even if it means we must be vulnerable. We can never allow one person to turn us sour on love. Instead, we must endure, learn from our mistakes, and celebrate the hope we have in Christ, because it will never disappoint us.■

    New American Standard Bible (NASB)
    New American Standard Bible®, Copyright © 1960, 1971, 1977, 1995, 2020 by The Lockman Foundation. All rights reserved.

    Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

    “Unlimited Capacity to Love”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2024. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.