Find A Christian Man

Tag: Christian Women Ministry

  • Did You Make It Disappear?

    1 John 3:16-17 (MSG)
    “This is how we’ve come to understand and experience love:  Christ sacrificed his life for us. This is why we ought to live sacrificially for our fellow believers, and not just be out for ourselves.  If you see some brother or sister in need and have the means to do something about it but turn a cold shoulder and do nothing, what happens to God’s love? It disappears. And you made it disappear.”

    The world is too crazy right now to turn a blind eye. Some maybe asking themselves, “What’s happened to God’s love? Why do we still have so much violence, racial tension, and complex problems throughout the world?” We’re hearing about the constant threat of war, and it’s natural that people want to know the cause of this seemingly unprecedented chaos and suffering around the globe. Even in our own personal lives, there are dilemmas left and right—financial difficulties, unemployment, broken relationships and many other issues that seem to be compounding. Some people are walking around in doubt and fear because they don’t think they have the answers to life anymore. They feel the rug has been yanked from underneath them.

    Although it may feel as though the bottom is falling out, we can be assured that God is on the case. He is allowing us to see what happens when people don’t honor Him as they should, but make no mistake, God is in control. Heavenly Father isn’t like us humans. Even though we’ve committed our lives to Him, we still vacillate in our decisions and behaviors, and we change like the weather; running hot one minute and cold the next. We can be very unpredictable to say the least. God is not like this. Numbers 23:19 (NLT) tells us, “God is not a man, so he does not lie. He is not human, so he does not change his mind. Has he ever spoken and failed to act? Has he ever promised and not carried it through?” God is an unchanging Father, and He loves us unconditionally, despite our wishy-washy ways at times.

    We can best believe that there’s a huge lesson we must learn from what we’re witnessing in the world, and the lesson is for both the unbelieving and those of us that are believers. The major component of it will no doubt be about the love of Christ, and how far we have deviated from it. This is not a new lesson, but the times speak to how critically we’ve ignored it. 1 John 3:16-17 tells us that to know and understand the love of Christ is to ‘live sacrificially for our fellow believers, and not just be out for ourselves.’ This is a measuring stick for whether all our dreams and aspirations are in line with God’s Word, because if they are, they will be drenched in a desire to love like Christ.

    1 John 3:16-17 speaks to the reality of God’s awesome and amazing love, and it also confirms the reality that we, you and I, are both the receivers and the conduits of His love. We have the distinct honor and privilege to give out what we have freely received. Most of us underestimate the impact that we can make on the lives of others. We don’t see ourselves as the ambassadors that Jesus Christ has made us, and we limit our outreach. This is an especially significant lesson for those that are praying to meet their future partners.

    It’s an important lesson because God’s love is wonderfully rich, exciting, and infused with His glory. There’s an indescribable luxuriousness to it, but yet, many singles are not enthusiastic about sharing this love with others. It is incredibly difficult for a person to make any progress in their quest for marriage if he or she isn’t confident in the love God has given us to share. Again, we have an obligation to be conduits of God’s love. When it comes to the blessing of marriage, God knows whether we will share His love through the example of Christ, or whether we will repeatedly revert back to habits of our old-man nature. God’s love is an overwhelming reality, but we have to ask ourselves if we are turning a cold shoulder and doing very little to show it forth. Are we making it disappear? Are we covering its light to the point that we are not illuminated in the eyes of the man that is supposed to see it?

    Love is, and forever will be, about what you do. We can tell someone we love them all day long, but it isn’t so much about what we say. There must be some evidence to back up the claim. Our loving Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, showed us how to love God’s way. His sacrifice paid the ultimate price because of his love for us all. He did what we could not do for ourselves. Our privilege and honor is to show our gratitude for what he has done by choosing to love others as he loves us.

    God says that when we have the ability and the means to be of service to someone in need, do so. Please don’t turn your back on them. God is working in you, and His love is made strong through your actions to bless others. Yes, the world is in pretty rough shape, but He tells us in 2Corinthians 12:9 that His grace is sufficient to us, because His strength is made perfect in weakness. Don’t allow the enemy to use the confusion of the world and the severity of these times to trick you out of the light of God’s love. Heavenly Father is the God of Wonderful, the Father of Awesome and Amazing. Never lose the excitement of His love. Let it shine brightly from your heart, and know that He will reward your commitment to live a life of love, sharing, and giving. ■

    Holy Bible, New International Version®, NIV® Copyright ©1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc.® Used by permission. All rights reserved worldwide.

    Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

     “Did You Make It Disappear?” written for findchristianman.com©2019. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord!

  • A Peaceful Harvest

    Hebrews 12:11 (NLT), tells us “No discipline is enjoyable while it is happening – it’s painful! But afterward there will be a peaceful harvest of right living for those who are trained in this way.” There are times when we become so used to doing things on our own that we don’t think to slow down and ask God if we’re doing it His way. It’s not because we don’t care; we do! Some things slip by us. Either because we haven’t been taught, or we’ve never encountered a situation that forced us to change our approach. Maybe we haven’t had to endure so much pressure that the only way to make it through was to let God lead us every step of the way. Most Christians today haven’t had to endure this kind of pressure, but those living after the ascension of Christ certainly understood it. They knew first hand that sin is the worst enemy, both to Heavenly Father and to us. This is why they endured the discipline of righteous living with conviction. They were being trained for a harvest of unspeakable joy, and this is the same training that God has made available to us.

    God gave us His Word so that we can maximize the most out of this life. And if that wasn’t enough, He gave us His Son so that we could live and have the most abundance that life has to offer. Hebrews 12 is especially impactful for us because it applies the rigors and triumphs of the Christian journey to those involved in a marathon or race. Not just any race, the one ran by our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. This is the course we all must look to. He finished his race and received the greatest prize that could be received. This is why his race should be our example, motivation, and goal.

    In Hebrews 12, God tells us about the great cloud of witnesses, men and women of tremendous faith who ran the race that He set before them. There are also others in our own families for whom, years ago, life was so difficult and unfair that they had no choice but to lean on their faith in the Lord. If they had not looked to their relationship with God through Christ, some would have been consumed by anger and bitterness, or quite possibly they would have lost their minds. We can’t imagine what it was like to endure all that they faced, and yet they still managed to pass on to us a legacy of faith. It is not a mistake that we should look back on the sufferings of those before us. It puts our light affliction in context, and should cause us to be more submissive under correction from our Heavenly Father.

    The Christian race is meant to be lifelong, but it is not a race without obstacles, turns, twists, and detours. It’s meant to keep us flexible, obedient, and always attentive to the directions and guidance of the Holy Spirit. With our stride steady and face in the wind, most of us become so used to running that sometimes we take this race for granted. We forget that seasons change. There are those seasons in which our spiritual strength is prime, and we experience a robust harvest of supernatural abundance. There are also seasons of quietness, where we know to be still. Then there are seasons where we don’t hear the voice of God the way we used to. This is our first clue that newness is upon us, and something in the way we’re running has to change.

    Proverbs 3:11-12 (NLT) tells us, “11 My child, don’t reject the Lord’s discipline, and don’t be upset when he corrects you. 12 For the Lord corrects those he loves, just as a father corrects a child in whom he delights.” God is training us to walk in the victory of Christ. He doesn’t want us to miss our blessing. God wants us to have a good life, the very best of everything, but just as a loving parent disciplines their child out of love, God does the same thing for us. He corrects those He loves. Praise Him for His correction! We want the Father to be well pleased with us. This is why we should take the time and space to check in with Heavenly Father for some endurance training.

    It is not always that we’re doing the wrong thing. Sometimes we’re too distracted to notice the change in season. The flowers of blessings may be blooming in a completely different field, but we missed it because we didn’t wait for more directions, and ran right passed it. Recognize that your race must be ran with both patience and endurance. It is God who set it through the Lord Jesus Christ. He’s the Rewarder of our faith, and only by being obedient to Him will we have a peaceful harvest and win the prize. ■

    Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

     “A Peaceful Harvest”, written for findchristianman.com©2019. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord!

  • You Are Equipped to Handle the Pressure

    I must admit that when it comes to the younger generation, I have been at times pessimistic; and I know I’m not the only one. I imagine some years ago my grandparents looked at my generation this same way. They couldn’t understand us or what made us tick. We were the ‘ME’ generation of their time; impatient and impetuous they thought. This is multiplied times ten with today’s youth, but there’s also a characteristic that I and many others have overlooked in them. They are fearless, and audacious. They think in ways that older generations haven’t, and God is birthing something magnificent in them for the uplifting of His Kingdom.

    This revelation regarding the youth of today has been in the back of my mind for a while, but when I heard a young Christian believer as she counseled a fellow college student, I was again reminded of it. 2Corinthians 3:12 tells us that because of the hope we have in Christ, we can have confidence and be very bold. This young woman understood this, and I was struck by her faith and the candor of which she spoke. The person she counseled is facing pressure from all directions; family issues at home, trying to keep up with class work, holding down a job, all while trying to provide for his young son. He felt overwhelmed and was about to make a huge mistake because he didn’t think he could handle it all.  Wisdom flowed effortlessly from this young woman as she told him, “You’re a man! God has equipped you to handle much worse pressure than this. You’ve got to gut-up, be strong, and figure things out!”

    I thought to myself, “Wow, I don’t think I was that bold and gutsy when I was her age.” But I was even more impressed with the wisdom and confidence in the Word of God that exuded through her words. This is the kind of brazen faith we must instill not only in our young Christian folks, but also veteran believers who still struggle with believing God in their relationships and the pursuit of marriage.

    Men and women were created to be partners. Each having strengths to compensate the other’s weaknesses or deficits; both working together harmoniously in unity, appreciating and valuing each other to the fullest. This is the union God has ordained. Numbers 23:19 tells us that God isn’t a man, and He does not tell lies. His Word is true, and His promises never fail. Heavenly Father never makes mistakes, and all that He does is perfect. He has anointed and appointed the man to function in a certain way. In many cases, we’ve seen women do what needs to be done and function just fine in the role that we might have believed to be that of a man, but God’s purpose cannot be questioned. It will always and forever boil down to the purpose that He has ordained. Any time that we forget God’s standard, and attempt to circumvent it, there’s going to be a result far less than optimum.

    As single women, particularly those of us that have children, we know pressure; have endured it from all angles and triumphed over it through the Lord Jesus Christ. Philippians 4:13(NLT) says, “For I can do everything through Christ, who gives me strength.” Many of us have renewed our minds to this truth because our life’s circumstances left us with no other choice. We’ve been strengthened by our faith that God has equipped us to press our way through, so why would we expect or accept any less from a man? We shouldn’t. A man is anointed and empowered by God to get things done, to protect and produce for those he loves. If it is apparent that he has chosen not to walk in this anointing, we should view it as a red flag.

    As women of Christ that have maneuvered through lack and loneliness, God has empowered us and helped us to be adept at finding resources and pulling them together. We’ve learned to turn a dollar store item into something that looks like a million bucks. We know how to make the best of a situation because we’ve had to. So when you have the opportunity to witness to a man, or school one that is half-stepping, remind him that He has been anointed and appointed to take care of business.

    The young woman who impressed me could have sugarcoated her counsel. Many of us have done it far too long. Instead, she spoke words seasoned by her faith that God would back up the truth she spoke. There is no such thing as God’s provision failing. There will be pressure, but through Christ, a man is equipped to handle it. If he is truly unselfish in his heart, is braced for sacrifice and hard work, all for the good of someone other than himself, God will open many doors for the man worthy of you. This is good news, and we must proclaim it to brothers every chance that we get. ■

    “You are Equipped to Handle the Pressure” written by FACM, Finding A Christian Man.Com ©2019.  All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord!

  • The Peace of God in Your Relationship

    After twenty-something years of marriage and two children, Sharon decided to divorce after her youngest graduated high school. This was six years ago, and four years later her high school sweetheart got a job at the company where she worked, and they began to date.  Sharon told me that her ex-husband had never stopped hoping that one day they’d find a way to re-unite. Recently, he’s asked her to marry him again.  She said, “He’s a good provider, he’s the father of my children, and my family loves him; but I have feelings for my boyfriend, and I don’t want to hurt anyone. I’ve prayed and asked God to help me, because I don’t know what to do.”

    If any of you are thinking like me, you can’t help but appreciate Sharon’s position to some degree. She has two men vying for her affection and attention. Not many of us can make this claim. However, anytime you find discord or confusion, you’ve got to use caution. 1 Corinthians 14:33a(NKJV) tells us so clearly, “For God is not the author of confusion but of peace.” God doesn’t initiate, create, or perpetuate confusion. He interjects peace, and Philippians 4:7 tells us that His peace exceeds anything we can understand. It will guard our hearts and minds as we are committed to live in Christ.

    Ambivalence, especially when it comes to relationships, is a sign that we don’t have God’s peace. It is sometimes an emotional and mental indicator that we need to be still, and wait until we can hear clearly from the Lord.  In Sharon’s case, she has forgotten how important it is to have the peace of God in a relationship. Without it, things turn to mush very quickly, and you lose the foundation that once gave the relationship endurance and unity.

    We can always learn from our previous relationships, especially those that are prior marriages. It is a big deal when a marriage falls apart and divorce enters the picture. Nothing is gained from playing the blame game, but it is important to analyze things as much as possible, so that mistakes and missteps are not repeated. Sharon and her ex-husband somehow lost the peace of God in their marriage. They may have looked to find in each other something that can only be found in God.

    We should never expect to receive from another individual something that only God can give. He gives us peace, joy, fulfillment, and so much more. When you learn how to find these spiritual goodies in God through Jesus Christ, you can then enter your relationship as a whole person, as opposed to someone who doesn’t really understand their identity in Christ, and is fragmented and insecure. When you’re in this fragmented state, it will spill over into your relationship. So, the peace of God is most definitely a foundation that must be built in our own hearts and minds, before we can bring it into any other relationship.

    Real and true peace is an inner calmness and contentment that abides because of our faith in God. It’s a joy that we experience despite any difficulty we might be encountering. It isn’t dependent upon any circumstance, but rests solely on our trust in our Heavenly Father through the Lord Jesus Christ.

    When we’ve lost God’s peace in a relationship, it is important for us to examine if we’ve grown to such an extent that we won’t lose it again. God knows our future. He wants only the best for us, and He knows WHO is best for us. Sharon indicated that she has prayed and asked God what to do, but we must also ask ourselves if we are in a position to hear His answer. It is important for us to rest in His peace, because this is when we can hear Him. It’s when we have intentionally drowned out all other noises so we can commune only with God. He is always speaking, and abiding in His peace will allow us to hear, so that we can make good decisions, and nurture our relationships from a place of wholeness, confidence, and strength. ■

    Scripture taken from the New King James Version. Copyright © 1982 by Thomas Nelson, Inc. Used by permission. All rights reserved.

    “The Peace of God in Your Relationship”, written for findchristianman.com©2019. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord!

  • Your Destiny Depends on It

    In the Old Testament, God called Joshua to take the place of Moses and lead the Israelites to possess the promised land. Other people were living in the land, but God told Joshua to be courageous and to have confidence that the Almighty would back him as he sought to possess it. In Joshua 1:9 (NLT) God said, “This is my command—be strong and courageous! Do not be afraid or discouraged. For the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.” All of us can well imagine that this was a huge comfort to him. Joshua had probably felt intimidated by the thought of filling Moses’ shoes and wondered how he would measure up. Even so, he didn’t waver and moved according to the promise God had made. As single women, we have made the quest to get married so complicated, but this verse in Joshua 1:9 breaks it down like elementary school. If we are truly aiming to walk in the destiny God has called us to, understanding one central component of this verse will shift our faith in high gear.

    It is very necessary that we draw a comparison between Joshua and the Children of Israel that followed him, and their fore parents who died in the wilderness. Their fore parents did not get the opportunity to live in the Promise Land. God called the Promise Land a land flowing with milk and honey because it was so fertile and rich with possibility. When you look ahead to the life that you envision for yourself, you need to ask yourself if it meets a criterion that is as high quality as the promise that God gave to the Children of Israel. They were not spiritual sons and daughters as we are, yet God promised them an inheritance so profound, it is still in place today. How much more do you think He will do for you?

    Those who followed the hand of God through Moses, were delivered out of bondage from the Egyptians. The Egyptians had been terrible and abusive task masters. Under the leadership of Moses, God’s children saw many miracles, signs, and wonders from Heavenly Father. He parted the Red Sea so they could walk through on dry land. He fed them manna from heaven, and preserved them wonderfully. They received all these amazing blessings, but when ten of the twelve spies brought them a bad report about the land God promised them, they jumped ship. They abandoned their trust in God and opted for fear instead of faith.

    If we examine what we know from God’s Word about their mindset, we can see very clearly that they didn’t have a vision and faith that equaled the promise that God had given them. They became afraid and angry. They even sought to do harm to Moses for bringing them out of Egypt. This is very hard to imagine, but there are very clear similarities between how they saw themselves in relation to God’s promise, and how the single sister desiring marriage sees herself in relation to the destiny God has ordained for her life.

    As you ponder the condition of those who did not get to live in the promised land, notice that the Will of God was not flexible to their unbelief. Those who were not able to raise their sights to believe that God would accomplish for them what seemed impossible were left behind. It wasn’t punishment. It is law, and God never breaks His laws. They didn’t believe, and therefore, they couldn’t receive.

    Those who DID believe the promise had destiny in their view, and this is the component of Joshua 1:9 that ought to shift our faith in high gear. God gave them the command to be strong and courageous. He knew their future, and that they would not waver at His command. He knew that they possessed the mind and heart to take what He had promised. They would not sit about with their hands tucked under their laps. They had to move, and showed themselves ready to receive God’s guidance as they executed one step after another.

    James 2:26 tells us that faith without works is dead. I submit to you that the distance between you and the promise of marriage can be bridged by what you do to back up your faith. You might question whether you know best how to move with due course to this end. God tells us in Psalm 32:8(NLT), “I will guide you along the best pathway for your life. I will advise you and watch over you.”  This is God’s Word. He will guide you, just as He guided His people to the Promise Land. He will advise you. He will tell you what to do, when to do it, and how to do it. The question you must ask yourself is are you really ready to listen for His instructions and guidance. We demonstrate our readiness to listen to God by silencing all the other noises of doubt, insecurity, and fear. We just tune in to Him, and He does the rest.

    Sometimes the scale of our vision and expectation is too small. I’m not referring to the size of the house you’ll live in, the kind of car you’ll drive, or the amount of money you’ll have in the bank when you get married. I’m referring to the lives that you and your future husband will touch with the Word of God. Envision what you’ll accomplish for the Kingdom and the legacy you’ll leave upon the earth as a result of the love of Christ that flows from your hearts to others. This is why you must be strong and courageous, and let Christ lead you into partnership, because your marriage is integral to the Plan and Will of God, and your destiny depends on it. ■

    Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

    “Your Destiny Depends on It”, written for findchristianman.com©2019. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord!

  • Leftovers Anyone?

    There was only one thing that drove my aunt to fits, and it was seeing a woman completely lose herself over a man. When I was younger, I never understood why it made her so angry. As I got older it was clear to me that she didn’t like the idea of a woman crumbling in vulnerability over someone who couldn’t or wouldn’t love her unconditionally. The notion that a woman would place all her eggs in the basket of a person that couldn’t even take care of his own, let alone someone else’s; this just didn’t make sense to her. She had very little sympathy for anyone that would place herself in this position. It’s possible that seeing this characteristic in another woman forced my aunt to face the pain of her own vulnerability, and this is something all of us must confront if we want to love from a place of strength.

    “She loves hard!” That’s what I heard someone say about a young woman that has recently had her heart broken. There are very few situations in life that hurt more intensely than this, and when we’re in this place of extreme vulnerability, you can best believe that the enemy isn’t going to sleep on it. If we, as women of God, do not stand for the truth, we will fall for anything. Talk about vulnerability, not knowing the truth or the difference between the truth and a lie, is the ultimate position of weakness. Anytime that we are tricked into believing something that isn’t the truth of God’s Word, we’ve given a little piece of ourselves over to darkness.

    In Matthew 6:33, Jesus Christ made it crystal clear that we must seek the Kingdom of God and His righteousness preeminently; no ifs, ands, or buts about it. In Matthew 6:24, he tells us exactly why this is demanded. A human being has some baked-in limitations, and one of them is that we cannot produce the same level of adoration, commitment, and reverence for two lords. He said, “for either he will hate the one, and love the other; or else he will hold to the one, and despise the other.”

    It is apparent that the degree of our suffering in heartbreak, and our inability to bounce back better and stronger with ease, gives way to the premise that at least on some level, we’ve tried to squeeze the man in between us and the place reserved for God alone. Psalm 62: 6-7 (NLT) tells us, “He alone is my rock and my salvation, my fortress where I will not be shaken. 7 My victory and honor come from God alone. He is my refuge, a rock where no enemy can reach me.” God is our sufficiency. He’s our refuge. We cannot receive from another human being what we receive from Him. There’s no equal to His love, care, and protection; and our actions and intentions should clarify that we understand the honor and reverence that He is due. So no shade to the sister that loves hard, but she had better make absolutely sure that if she loves the man hard, her love for God better be concrete boulders of epic proportion.

    Keeping it real for Jesus, how would it look for us to try and give God our leftover love? He’s not having it. And if we’ll look at this with greater scrutiny, we might find that, yes, it was an unconscious oversight to give what belongs to God to someone else. However, the end result of doing this is that we will ultimately receive something that mirrors our neglect of honoring Heavenly Father the way that we should.

    With relationships, it can be a delicate balance, but it is one that we had better make sure keeps God in the number one spot. Leftovers after a good meal are fine, but not when it comes to love, commitment, and honor. When you’ve been wounded by the man that you adore, you’re in the unique position of understanding what it feels like to be neglected, taken for granted, and given crumbs in the form of his leftovers. Please, sister-friends, for the sake of your life in Christ, never let it be said that you have attempted to treat God in the same way.■

    Holy Bible, New International Version®, NIV® Copyright ©1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc.® Used by permission. All rights reserved worldwide.

    “Leftovers Anyone?” written for findchristianman.com©2019. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord!

  • The Reflection of Your Heart

    The Word of God teaches us how to live in such a way that we keep His blessings flowing in our lives. It is critical that the single Christian woman believes this, because one of the major setbacks in a Christian’s life is that after a while, our senses become dull and we grow less and less teachable. We begin to entertain people and situations that are designed to interrupt God’s plan for our lives. Proverbs 15:10 (NLT) deals with an unteachable person in a very straightforward way. It warns, “Whoever abandons the right path will be severely disciplined; whoever hates correction will die.” This verse reinforces the importance of humility in our walks in Christ, and that we should learn to greatly value God’s correction.

    Proverbs 15:10 is God’s warning to those who, like people living in Old Testament times, had been on the Christian journey a while. They thought they knew all the answers, and refused to be corrected by the wisdom of His Word. They were inflexible, and inflexibility is a sign of a hardened heart.

    Our Heavenly Father has placed His Spirit in the inner sanctum of our beings. He’s with us every moment of every day. He has an inside view of our propensity to become so accustomed to our routines that we don’t want to break out of them. We start to take things for granted, and we bring this into our relationships with God. We turn a blind eye to what the Spirit is revealing.

    This is what happens in some of our marriages as well. We forget the sting of loneliness and what it was like to want to be married but not have the right person in our lives. After a few years of seeing our spouses every day, couples will take each other for granted and forget how special it is to have one another. It takes a certain level of consciousness to make ourselves remember to honor the person who loves us most. If we’re not the type of person who practices mindfulness, of being aware of what it takes to make a person feel supported and valued, then this is something we absolutely must learn.

    Our relationship with God will cast a reflection on the relationship with our spouses. Are we acknowledging God’s gifts? How are we demonstrating our appreciation for His love? Are we taking His grace and mercy for granted? Our intimacy with Heavenly Father should be stronger and more fulfilling than any other relationship. Our friendship with the Holy Spirit should be one of seeking his council, leadership, and guidance in every decision and choice that we make. We must be so in love with Jesus that the reflection of our hearts illuminates the lives of our husbands.

    Proverbs 21:2 (NLT) says, “People may be right in their own eyes, but the Lord examines their heart.” I’ve spoken with many single women that are very impatient with the process of spiritually preparing to marry. They feel that they’re ready to take that walk down the aisle, but there is so much more to learn from God about being the kind of wife He desires them to be. Heavenly Father just wants the best for us. He sees our hearts. He wants our marriages to be a reflection of His love, and He knows where we need to be strengthened so that our relationships are fulfilling and will last.

    When it comes to your desire for marriage, ask yourself if you are really allowing God to lead you through the person of the Holy Spirit. Have you given Holy Spirit a place in your life? Because if you make a commitment to honor him, to communicate with him, and allow him to take control of your decisions and choices, he will always guide you on the path to God’s love, joy, and purpose. Be sure to give the Holy Spirit room in your life. Let him take control of your quest to be married, so that your heart will reflect the quality of God’s love that you will both give and receive.■

    Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

    “The Reflection of Your Heart”, written for findchristianman.com©2019. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord!

  • Learning to Pace Yourself

    A good friend of mine met a man through another mutual friend. They engaged in a little small talk, exchanged numbers, and he said that he would call her in a couple of days when he was back in town. True to his word, he phoned. They had a few really nice conversations and planned a date. Prior to the date, my friend said to me, “I hope he doesn’t turn out to be a stalker that calls all the time!” I found this to be a strange comment for her to make, because he had not given her any reason to suspect that he was anything of the sort. He had simply held to his word, and that’s a really admirable quality, but she immediately dismissed it and went straight for the negative.

    Rather than allowing this man to get comfortable with occupying the space of acquaintance or friendship, my friend tried to peg him as a possible marital partner, and began stacking him against her list of criteria. Not only had she jumped to conclusions before getting to know who he is, but she was already piling on the baggage from her previous relationships. “…And if he has more than two kids under the age of 18, I’ll entertain only one date, and that’s it!” she said.

    Galatians 5:6(NLT) tells us, “For when we place our faith in Christ Jesus, there is no benefit in being circumcised or being uncircumcised. What is important is faith expressing itself in love.” Faith has requirements, and they do not let up, but increase as we get closer and closer to the fulfillment of God’s promises. So imagine if you begin a new friendship by wrapping it in fear from day one. It will take incredible energy to reroute it from that point.

    Single Christians are to occupy their time getting tight in their relationships with God, and becoming spiritually sharp. We are poised to be the greatest examples of Christ, because of the amount of alone time we get to spend with him before we get married. In turn, he teaches us how to express our faith through his love. Some of us just haven’t given Christ the reigns in this area of our lives. We rush to occupy our time with other things, and this gives the enemy the opportunity to sabotage our efforts to partner.

    Learning to pace ourselves is very important, not only when it comes to meeting someone new, but also in giving ourselves time to make good decisions for our own hearts. God has given us the gift of the indwelling Holy Spirit to help us maintain a healthy pace. He knows how to lead and guide us, and he will also keep us out of danger. So rather than jumping to conclusions, and letting negative baggage from the past ruin our futures, we can choose to demonstrate spiritual maturity. Having faith in God’s positioning is the best way to be loving and kind to yourself. You don’t have to rush anything. You can simply enjoy meeting new people and being a blessing to them.

    Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

    “Learning to Pace Yourself” written for findchristianman.com©2019. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord!

  • When No One is Watching

    A friend shared a teachable moment she had with her teenage daughter while they were on vacation. They visited a store to purchase gifts to take back home for co-workers and friends. When they went up to the cashier to make their purchase, the gentleman was so distracted with other customers that he completely forgot to take their money. Without realizing the mistake, he gave them their merchandise and said “Have a nice day”.  My friend immediately and discreetly said, “Sir, excuse me, but you didn’t ring us up. We need to pay for our purchase.” When they exited the store, her daughter said, “Mom, we could have walked out of the store with the merchandise and the money too.” She responded by telling her daughter, “Yes, but do you think God would have been pleased if we had done that?”

    Keeping it real, many people would have walked right out of that store with the goodies and cash in hand, and wouldn’t have felt the slightest hint of guilt about it. But what we fail to realize is that our actions in situations like these are markers. They indicate our spiritual maturity level and our preparedness for greater blessings. God is always watching.

    Proverbs 15:11(NLT) tells us, “Even Death and Destruction hold no secrets from the LORD. How much more does he know the human heart!” Heavenly Father knows everything under the sun about His children. He knows the choices and decisions we’re going to make before we even think about them. He knows our beginning and our end. He also knows that the human heart can be a pretty treacherous tool when used the wrong way. It can plot the vilest and most evil attacks, and it can also love intensely deep. God knows it all, and He expects us to know that it’s not enough to do right when everyone is watching. What counts are the choices and decisions we make when no one is watching or paying attention. These actions are the ones that speak to what is in our hearts.

    One of the standards for this can be found in 1Corinthians 1:21(NLT). The Apostle Paul wrote, “Since God in his wisdom saw to it that the world would never know him through human wisdom, he has used our foolish preaching to save those who believe.” The truth that Jesus Christ was a King and the Messiah who died on the cross was too hard to swallow for some people living during his time; this is true for many living today as well. Folks living back then didn’t think that Jesus Christ lived up to their human wisdom regarding what a king should be, how a king should look, and how a king should act. When our Lord and Savior came to the earth to reveal the heart of God, he was born in a manger, a place where the animals were kept and fed. There were no huge celebrations regarding his birth, and when he grew up to be a man, he did not wear fine garments and fancy jewelry as one would expect of a king, particularly a king who had all power in his hands. The hearts of people were in the wrong place, and that is why they couldn’t see the love of God that our King Jesus introduced into this dark world. 

    God is wise beyond what any of us can fathom. If the majesty and excellence of Christ had been revealed through the spectacle of grandeur and trivial things like fancy clothes and jewelry, people would have responded to Christ differently. Many of them would have gravitated towards him and been on their best behavior for the wrong reasons. They would have been consumed with the outward appearances, and not with the liberty and light that he brought to liberate the earth. They would have lavished him with gifts, and pretended to love him, even though their hearts were crooked. In a nutshell, people would have received a superficial message about what is truly important to God.

    1Corinthians 1:21(NLT) tells us that people wanted a human sign, something that spoke to their arrogance, to let them know that Jesus Christ was the Messiah, but God wanted to see their true hearts. Jesus did not come to appease those hungry for notoriety and arrogance. He restored sight to the blind, hearing to the deaf; he healed the sick and casted out demons from those that were possessed and oppressed by them. He came to show us the way, and to reveal the heart of the Father. His compassion, and the purity of his love and power is the thing that would awaken the hearts of his people and cause them to want to live right.

    Jesus Christ is THE King, but he allowed himself to be brought low and suffered the cross for our sakes. Just as there was nothing superficial about Jesus Christ, God doesn’t want there to be anything superficial about our hearts for Him either. If we are true followers of Christ, we will be honest, loving, respectful, and have integrity especially when no one is looking or paying attention. We will guard our hearts with diligence. We’ll behave in a way that pleases God, and realize that His eyes are upon us every moment of each day.■

    Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

    “When No One is Watching”, written for findchristianman.com©2019. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord!

  • What Are You Thinking?

    “And now, dear brothers and sisters, one final thing. Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise.” Philippians 4:8 (NLT)

    Sometimes, we Christians forget that God made Science. All the new discoveries and technological advances exist because of the brilliance that Heavenly Father has woven into all of creation. Today, we are seeing Christian scholars have dialogues about Quantum Physics, because they are beginning to understand how it correlates with biblical truths, and in some cases, expands our understanding of them. Take the body for instance, we are fearfully and wonderfully made, yet the human body is 50% to 75% water. As powerful as we are physically, and as intricately woven together as we are, it’s astounding to think that the body mostly consists of something as fluid as water. This should prompt us to consider the potency of something as fluid as a thought.

    A thought isn’t tangible. We can’t touch or feel it. We can’t hold it in our hands and examine it from all angles. It is an expression of an idea or feeling, and although it is seemingly transparent, it is one of the most powerful elements of human existence.

    Thoughts are vibrations, and vibrations are frequencies. This is what Heavenly Father created thought to be. Frequencies ultimately result in the manifestation of matter; as thoughts of faith ultimately result in the manifestation of what we are believing to receive. This is the amazingly potent effect of focusing our thoughts on the living-breathing, positives of God’s Word.

    Physics teaches us that everything has a vibration. When atoms are observed under incredibly powerful microscopes, they can be seen vibrating. All energy behaves this way. Understanding the mechanics of how things work has not been high on the priority list of many Christians, but God tells us in Hosea 4:6 that His people are destroyed because they lack knowledge. He doesn’t want us to be ignorant, but to get as much understanding as possible, so that we become wise.

    Negativity is at the base or bottom level of existence; it is barely life at all. In other words, it is the lowest form and frequency of operating. Negativity resonates and vibrates with negativity. It is all things dark, deadly, destructive, oppressive, and fearful. It calls attention to what it is. So, when we have negative thoughts, we are signaling everything that vibrates at a level of our negativity; and thereby attracting it to ourselves. Negative thoughts can create a negative cycle that can potentially encapsulate our lives and keep us spiraling downward. Yes, all of this stems from something as powerful and fluid as a thought.

    Make no mistake, this is not New Age goobledygook. This is the science behind the brilliant way God created everything to work. When you understand this, you can see why He tells us to fix our thoughts on what is true, honorable, right, pure, lovely, and admirable. These are the components of excellence and praise! They have a high frequency; and therefore, vibrate and draw to us the most positive of positives.

    God is giving us a strategy for remaining in the arc of His safety, protection, and care. He’s telling us how to stay out of the enemy’s territory of death and destruction. By saturating our thought life with what is true, honorable, right, pure, lovely, and admirable, we come into agreement and harmony with God’s goodness through Jesus Christ.

    How many of us can actually say that most of our thoughts consist of at least three of the qualities listed in Philippians 4:8?  If we’re honest, many of us would give ourselves a pat on the back if we’re staying our minds on at least one of them. We have become accustomed to worldly behavior, and allow the world’s systems to bombard us with too many distractions.

    The Apostle Paul said in 2Corinthians 10:5 (NLT), “We destroy every proud obstacle that keeps people from knowing God. We capture their rebellious thoughts and teach them to obey Christ.” This is the hallmark of a true disciple of Christ. We are to capture the thoughts that go against the grain of God’s love and teach them to obey the Lord Jesus Christ. We do this so that we don’t add to the negativity of this world; we bring light to it, so that darkness can be exposed and eradicated.

    God tells us in Romans 12:2(NKJV), “And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God.” To reverse the negative and move ourselves into a positive trajectory, there’s no question about it; we’ve got to renew our minds. This is the methodology that God has given us to align our mental and emotional centers with the guidance of the indwelling Holy Spirit. This is how we keep our relationship with God on track.

    Negativity blocks you from being your very best for God. A carnal mind is an undisciplined and untrained mind. The Word teaches us that it is an enemy of God. We must begin to train our thoughts to move in the direction that He has told us they should go. He tells us to renew our minds by transforming our thoughts; this is His definitive directive. Make the conscious choice to renew your mind. Change your thoughts to those that mirror the mind of Christ. If you dedicate yourself to this practice, you will see a dramatic change in your life in the present, and you will lay the groundwork for a fabulous future!■

    Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

    “What Are You Thinking?”, written for findchristianman.com©2019. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord!