Find A Christian Man

Category: Encouragement and Inspiration

Biblical encouragement for the seasons when you need strength, hope, perspective, or simply a reminder that God is still at work. Find Christ-centered inspiration to help you keep moving forward, stand firm in your faith, and face everyday life with renewed confidence in God and His Word.

Work, Waiting, Want, and Will

Ecclesiastes 11:4-5(NLT) tells us, “4 Farmers who wait for perfect weather never plant. If they watch every cloud, they never harvest. 5 Just as you cannot understand the path of the wind or the mystery of a tiny baby growing in its mother’s womb, so you cannot understand the activity of God, who does all things.” I’m very partial to these verses. They resonate with me on a personal level. I was raised on a farm in the rural south, and my grandfather was a farmer with lots of land and plenty of farm animals. I know personally that farming is hard work. My grandfather would be up before the chickens. Sometimes during the day, we’d visit him in the chicken houses and play with the baby chicks. He never stopped working, not for rain or bad weather, not for sore muscles and aching bones, and not for the trivial things that impede many of us today. I don’t even think the word ‘perfect’ was in his vocabulary. Whatever degree of perfection existed in his mind came at the price of hard work, and there were no excuses. People often say today that men like my grandfather don’t exist anymore. To some extent that might be true, but it doesn’t take away from the reality that God uses the example of a farmer to paint a very clear picture for us, and as single believers, we can’t afford to miss it.

My grandfather wasn’t the type of man that waited around for things to happen; farming in his day didn’t allow that luxury. He was up rain or shine, cold or hot. He was planting, sowing, feeding, and picking; and he knew exactly how to perform this work. The thing about a farmer is that he or she `realizes they’re not the ones in charge of the harvest. God is in charge of the harvest. Jesus Christ tells us this in Matthew 9:38. He tells us to pray to Heavenly Father who is in charge of the harvest and ask Him to send more workers into His fields. This gives us all the perspective we need. Humans can’t control the necessary elements and ingredients to produce a harvest. We can’t control the rain or sunshine, nor can we make the soil. All of it was created by our Heavenly Father. Every good farmer knows that the most he or she can do is sow. He or she can plant seeds, pray for the favor of God, and trust Him to do all the rest. That’s an excellent spiritual lesson for the single believer praying for a spouse.

A man that is a farmer is motivated by many things. He’s motivated by the ability to take care of himself, and most importantly, he’s motivated to make a living to care for his family. No one has to tell him to be up at the crack of dawn. He understands it’s necessary for everything to stay on schedule and for the harvest to come in on time. This is a very key piece of discernment for a woman seeking a Godly man. Some males have no interest in being a provider, but being a provider is the mark of man. He’s not going out doing just any ol’ thing for coins. A man moves with the confidence and integrity of knowing his identity. He knows that as a provider, he will obtain favor from God for doing what a man is supposed to do.

Ecclesiastes 11:4-5 is speaking to us about work, waiting, want, and will. Work is the revealer of our faith. No farmer would plant seeds without faith that God will take care of the rest. Many complain that there’s no harvest in their lives or that the harvest they’ve received is not the harvest they expected, but the truth will always take us back to what we’ve planted or if we’ve planted at all. We’ve received our marching orders from our Master, Jesus Christ. The harvest is never the issue. It’s about the laborers. Will we do what God requires? Or will we wait on perfect weather and optimum conditions? With God, there are no excuses. We must be attentive to do what He requires and stop waiting to move into action. We need to get busy sowing the seeds of God’s Word, and Heavenly Father will take care of the rest.

Life isn’t about what we want for ourselves. It’s about what God wants for us. He reminds us in Ecclesiastes 5:5 that none of us know the path of the wind. Jesus Christ told Nicodemus in John 3:8(NLT), “The wind blows wherever it wants. Just as you can hear the wind but can’t tell where it comes from or where it is going, so you can’t explain how people are born of the Spirit.” We can’t explain the wind, nor do we understand the mysteries of our spiritual rebirth in Christ. We don’t know the intricate details concerning a child growing in its mother’s womb. This is all God’s activity. It’s His creation. We can’t understand it, and we don’t need to. Our responsibility is to trust Him and trust His plan.

Ecclesiastes 11:6(NLT) tells us, “Plant your seed in the morning and keep busy all afternoon, for you don’t know if profit will come from one activity or another—or maybe both.” This is God’s Will! Sow your seed! Sow into your family, sow into your friends, sow into yourself, and most importantly, sow into God’s Kingdom. We can’t complain about the harvest when we’ve not done our part and sowed in the way God has commanded. God’s Will is for His people to be overwhelmingly happy and fulfilled, with a supportive spouse that loves them, but we must do our parts. Our seed investment is the revealer of our faith, and the harvest we receive will show exactly what we’ve planted. ■

Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

“Work, Waiting, Want, and Will”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2022. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

May 30, 2022
The Right Heart Will Put You at the Right Place at the Right Time

Luke 19:5-6(NLT)
“5 When Jesus came by, he looked up at Zacchaeus and called him by name. “Zacchaeus!” he said. “Quick, come down! I must be a guest in your home today.” 6 Zacchaeus quickly climbed down and took Jesus to his house in great excitement and joy. 7 But the people were displeased. “He has gone to be the guest of a notorious sinner,” they grumbled.”

Luke 19 tells us that Zacchaeus was known throughout the region for being the chief tax collector, and he had become a very successful man. He was also a very short man, and in our day, the stigma about short men is common knowledge. Over the years, some in society have viewed shorter men as less strong or powerful, and because of this, some shorter men overcompensate. They feel the need to be over achievers, and overly aggressive or domineering. We don’t know if Zacchaeus felt this way, but we do know from God’s Word that he had earned himself a high rank and was viewed as a person of authority. Zacchaeus was rich, and Jesus Christ talked about how difficult it was for a rich person to enter the Kingdom of heaven. Those with great possession and wealth make a habit of clinging to the entrapment of those things. They value wealth more than they do faith in the Lord Jesus Christ, and this way of operating ends in damnation. Zacchaeus stands out because on the day he met Jesus Christ face to face, his short stature meant that he had to do quite a bit of maneuvering. He knew the encounter with Christ would change him forever, and that it would be a treasure more valuable than any in the earth. This record is a profound spiritual lesson for the believer, because it demonstrates the heart that is necessary to abide in the love, power, and faith of Jesus Christ.

Many single people are wondering why the quest to cross paths with the person that is right for their lives isn’t immediate. They want results on the double and don’t understand why this blessing doesn’t materialize on demand. Sometimes, the delay is due to how a person views the desire for marriage and how they are feeling about it in their hearts. They view it as a necessity, God views it as a reward for being faithful to His purpose. Romans 10:17 tells us that faith comes by hearing and perceiving the Word of God. When we break this down a little bit, we understand that faith can either be stagnant or faith can move. God’s Word is the truth. It is the definitive authority on every subject, aspect, and detail of life and living. God’s Word causes faith to come. Many single people don’t know the Word of God as well as they should, and you can’t have faith in something you don’t know or don’t believe. The knowledge of God’s Word that we do not know can cause us to walk around with a stagnant faith.

Given his short stature, Zacchaeus had a very strong determination, and it demonstrated his faith. To get through a crowd of others that were clamoring for the Master and to be able to climb a tree in hopes of getting a glimpse of Jesus Christ was evidence of how Zacchaeus had prioritized this encounter. He already had great wealth and affluence, yet these things had not fulfilled him. He knew there was more to life and would not let the opportunity to meet Jesus slip by him.

Every believer that is single and desiring marriage has to ask themselves if they feel this way about an encounter with Jesus Christ. At the time during which Zacchaeus desired to meet Christ, the new birth reality was not yet available. Zacchaeus did not have the Spirit of Christ dwelling within him, yet his desire for Christ far exceeds many of us living today.

We can’t fake the intentions of our hearts before God. He knows us too well. He knows us through and through, and He is fully aware of our motivations. This is one of the reasons that Zacchaeus received the tremendous blessing of salvation, because his heart was where it needed to be. The people in the crowd grumbled because they didn’t think Zacchaeus deserved to be in the company of the Master, but he had a heart for God, and this is all that mattered. James 2:26 gives us the definitive truth on this. It says, “For as the body without the spirit is dead, so faith without works is dead also.” Zacchaeus didn’t wait to be told how to demonstrate his thankfulness to God. Luke 19:8(NKJV) tells us, “Then Zacchaeus stood and said to the Lord, “Look, Lord, I give half of my goods to the poor; and if I have taken anything from anyone by false accusation, I restore fourfold.” This man’s deeds—his good works—demonstrated the condition of his heart. He wanted God to be pleased with his life and had done the things required to show it.

We must be clear that marital partnership isn’t necessary for ambassadorship in Christ, but commitment is. Jesus tells us in Luke 12:48 that to whom much is given, much is required. We must demonstrate our willingness to give our all to God through Jesus Christ. This is the attitude and heart-set that is rewarded. It was Zacchaeus’s heart that moved Jesus Christ to call him down from a sycamore tree. Zacchaeus had the right heart, and because he did, it put him at the right place at the right time. Let his example be your motivation, so that the same can be said of you. ■

Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

“The Right Heart Will Put You at the Right Place at the Right Time”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2022. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

May 23, 2022
Showing God Your Proof

Ecclesiastes 11:4-5(NLT) tells us, “4 Farmers who wait for perfect weather never plant. If they watch every cloud, they never harvest. 5 Just as you cannot understand the path of the wind or the mystery of a tiny baby growing in its mother’s womb, so you cannot understand the activity of God, who does all things.” I’m very partial to these verses. They resonate with me on a personal level. I was raised on a farm in the rural south, and my grandfather was a farmer with lots of land and plenty of farm animals. I know personally that farming is hard work. My grandfather would be up before the chickens. Sometimes during the day, we’d visit him in the chicken houses and play with the baby chicks. He never stopped working, not for rain or bad weather, not for sore muscles and aching bones, and not for the trivial things that impede many of us today. I don’t even think the word ‘perfect’ was in his vocabulary. Whatever degree of perfection existed in his mind came at the price of hard work, and there were no excuses. People often say today that men like my grandfather don’t exist anymore. To some extent that might be true, but it doesn’t take away from the reality that God uses the example of a farmer to paint a very clear picture for us, and as single believers, we can’t afford to miss it.

My grandfather wasn’t the type of man that waited around for things to happen; farming in his day didn’t allow that luxury. He was up rain or shine, cold or hot. He was planting, sowing, feeding, and picking; and he knew exactly how to perform this work. The thing about a farmer is that he or she `realizes they’re not the ones in charge of the harvest. God is in charge of the harvest. Jesus Christ tells us this in Matthew 9:38. He tells us to pray to Heavenly Father who is in charge of the harvest and ask Him to send more workers into His fields. This gives us all the perspective we need. Humans can’t control the necessary elements and ingredients to produce a harvest. We can’t control the rain or sunshine, nor can we make the soil. All of it was created by our Heavenly Father. Every good farmer knows that the most he or she can do is sow. He or she can plant seeds, pray for the favor of God, and trust Him to do all the rest. That’s an excellent spiritual lesson for the single believer praying for a spouse.

A man that is a farmer is motivated by many things. He’s motivated by the ability to take care of himself, and most importantly, he’s motivated to make a living to care for his family. No one has to tell him to be up at the crack of dawn. He understands it’s necessary for everything to stay on schedule and for the harvest to come in on time. This is a very key piece of discernment for a woman seeking a Godly man. Some males have no interest in being a provider, but being a provider is the mark of a man. He’s not going out doing just any ol’ thing for coins. A man moves with the confidence and integrity of knowing his identity. He knows that as a provider, he will obtain favor from God for doing what a man is supposed to do.

Ecclesiastes 11:4-5 is speaking to us about work, waiting, want, and will. Work is the revealer of our faith. No farmer would plant seeds without faith that God will take care of the rest. Many complain that there’s no harvest in their lives or that the harvest they’ve received is not the harvest they expected, but the truth will always take us back to what we’ve planted or if we’ve planted at all. We’ve received our marching orders from our Master, Jesus Christ. The harvest is never the issue. It’s about the laborers. Will we do what God requires? Or will we wait on perfect weather and optimum conditions? With God, there are no excuses. We must be attentive to do what He requires and stop waiting to move into action. We need to get busy sowing the seeds of God’s Word, and Heavenly Father will take care of the rest.

Life isn’t about what we want for ourselves. It’s about what God wants for us. He reminds us in Ecclesiastes 5:5 that none of us know the path of the wind. Jesus Christ told Nicodemus in John 3:8(NLT), “The wind blows wherever it wants. Just as you can hear the wind but can’t tell where it comes from or where it is going, so you can’t explain how people are born of the Spirit.” We can’t explain the wind, nor do we understand the mysteries of our spiritual rebirth in Christ. We don’t know the intricate details concerning a child growing in its mother’s womb. This is all God’s activity. It’s His creation. We can’t understand it, and we don’t need to. Our responsibility is to trust Him and trust His plan.

Ecclesiastes 11:6(NLT) tells us, “Plant your seed in the morning and keep busy all afternoon, for you don’t know if profit will come from one activity or another—or maybe both.” This is God’s Will! Sow your seed! Sow into your family, sow into your friends, sow into yourself, and most importantly, sow into God’s Kingdom. We can’t complain about the harvest when we’ve not done our part and sowed in the way God has commanded. God’s Will is for His people to be overwhelmingly happy and fulfilled, with a supportive spouse that loves them, but we must do our parts. Our seed investment is the revealer of our faith, and the harvest we receive will show exactly what we’ve planted. ■

Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

“Work, Waiting, Want, and Will”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2022. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

May 17, 2022
Speak the Truth About What You Want

One of my sister-friends and I were talking on the phone the other day and I noticed she didn’t sound quite like herself, so I asked her what was wrong. She didn’t hesitate to reveal what was on her mind and heart. It was as if she had been waiting for someone to give her permission to unleash her frustration. “We’ve been inseparable for thirteen-months, and there’s been no mention from him of wanting to move things closer to a commitment. I don’t want to seem desperate, like all my happiness is depending on him. And I don’t want to push him away either, but I’m ready for something more, and I just feel so stuck right now.” In thirteen months, over a year, neither of them had taken the time to discuss their expectations with one another. I was stunned by this. With all the conveniences of cell phones, texting, internet, pen and paper, and greeting cards and e-cards that express just about anything you want to say, in all that time, two grown folks didn’t communicate what they wanted from one another. Why?

James 2:26(NLT) tells us, “Just as the body is dead without breath, so also faith is dead without good works.” Ladies and gentlemen, faith is required for anything any of us might attempt to do. It doesn’t matter what it is, how large or small, without faith, it won’t get done. We need faith to move from point A to point B, and Jesus Christ commands us in Mark 11:22 to have faith in God! Our Heavenly Father is a God of order, and His order dictates that we first find out what is available to receive from Him. Then, we can begin to move forward. Many of us get this twisted. We see what we like, pursue it, and ask God to bless what we’ve pursued. Some of us have found out the hard way that this isn’t a workable strategy.

At a fundamental level, we know that God desires us to marry should we desire it for ourselves. Take a look at Ecclesiastes 4:7-12(MSG), “7-8 I turned my head and saw yet another wisp of smoke on its way to nothingness: a solitary person, completely alone—no children, no family, no friends—yet working obsessively late into the night, compulsively greedy for more and more, never bothering to ask, “Why am I working like a dog, never having any fun? And who cares?” More smoke. A bad business. 9-10 It’s better to have a partner than go it alone. Share the work, share the wealth. And if one falls down, the other helps, But if there’s no one to help, tough! 11 Two in a bed warm each other. Alone, you shiver all night. 12 By yourself you’re unprotected. With a friend you can face the worst.” God schools us here on the basics of unity and what two people can accomplish when they walk together through life. He knows the benefits of partnership, that’s why He designed it. So, if we want marriage, we can have confidence that He wants it for us, more than we could ever want it for ourselves. He desires our happiness.

After we’ve developed confidence and trust that God indeed wants the best for us, we should also ask Him to show us WHO is the best for us. We shouldn’t make assumptions in this area without seeking His guidance, because that’s not faith, that’s guessing. My sista-friend assumed her boyfriend understood her desires without the both of them ever communicating about them. After an investment of over a year of her time and energy, she may have set herself up for disappointment.

You don’t have to hit someone over the head with this as soon as you start dating. In fact, it’s best to allow that conversation to evolve organically, but it shouldn’t take over a year. I can’t say why they haven’t communicated about marriage or whether both of them want it and plan to head in that direction, but both my friend and her boyfriend are really smart people. She’s been around him long enough to sense how he feels about their relationship. My guess is that she hasn’t broached the subject because she fears he’s going to say the very words she doesn’t want to hear, “I don’t want marriage.”

1John 3:18 (NLT) says, “Dear children, let’s not merely say that we love each other; let us show the truth by our actions.” This is good medicine and good practice. As God’s daughters, we should have an expectation that God will present us with someone He approves of, someone that will have our backs and consider it a privilege to walk with us through life. Any good father would want this for his daughter, and this is even more true of Heavenly Father. We should never have any fear about speaking the truth of God’s Word and speaking the truth about what we want. Have faith in God and have faith in what He desires for your life. Ask Him for His guidance so that you are led to the right man who will desire marriage and won’t hesitate to let you know it. ■

Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

“Speak the Truth About What You Want”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2022. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

May 2, 2022
When You Least Expect It

One sunny summer day, my sisters’ and I had spent the afternoon shopping. Our hands were filled with bags as we were getting in our car. My oldest sister was driving and had just gotten behind the wheel. My middle sister, the most notable shopaholic among us, was finagling bags to try and open the passenger-side door. Out of nowhere, a complete stranger approached her. He offered to help my sister, and with her permission, he opened the door, and then closed it after she was seated. Our mouths were agape as we watched him very gentlemanly assist her, and then wish us all a good afternoon. We were like, “What just happened?” Although this kindness occurred quite a number of years ago, the impact of it strikes me even today.

Whenever I mention this occurrence to others, particularly women, the comments range from, “You’ll never see that happening today…” to “Hope your bags were intact.” Isn’t it something that in the face of such a simple and beautiful act of kindness, many of us suspect the worse? It’s sad, because as daughters of our Heavenly Father, it is His desire that such kindnesses are heaped on us every day of our lives. Many of us have gone through such heartbreak and disrespect from prior relationships that we no longer expect this kind of chivalry from a man, and some of us have never experienced it to any significant degree.

And of course, there are some that ask if we ever saw him again. We didn’t, but it was enough to know that such a man exists, and he’s not the only one of his kind. I’m reminded of the record in the Old Testament, when Elijah complained to God that there were so few within His people, the children of Israel, that were faithful to God’s covenant. Elijah was in deep despair over their sinful behavior and betrayal. He knew the tremendous blessings that God had given them, and they repaid God’s kindness and grace with arrogance and sin. Elijah was weary of their shenanigans, and he tried to use their disobedience as an excuse to throw his hands up and retreat. He didn’t want to be bothered with them anymore and thought they were a useless cause. Many of God’s people had forsaken Him, and Elijah could hardly stomach seeing them ruin and run down things that they should have held sacred in their hearts and minds.

Elijah complained to God in 1Kings 19:14(NLT), “I have zealously served the LORD God Almighty. But the people of Israel have broken their covenant with you, torn down your altars, and killed every one of your prophets. I am the only one left, and now they are trying to kill me, too.” Many of us can relate somewhat to how Elijah felt. If you’ve been traveling in the ‘single’s lane’ a while, it can feel very much like no one truly understands what you’re about. They can’t match your capacity to love and don’t have the depth to walk with you through life. You might feel like Elijah, that the bottom of the barrow is what’s left, and there’s no sea of which a treasure can be found.

God told Elijah in 1Kings 19:18 that He had preserved 7,000 of His people that had not bowed to the idol, baal, or served him. Elijah made an incorrect assumption that underestimated God’s power, intelligence, and provision. Many single believers have done the same thing. God doesn’t punish us when we think this way, He helps us, but will we allow ourselves to be helped? 2Chronicles 16:9(NLT) says, “The eyes of the LORD search the whole earth in order to strengthen those whose hearts are fully committed to him.” He’s searching the entire earth, looking for a certain characteristic in our hearts, and it is the humility to trust His Word and become fully committed to our relationships with Him. When we do this, we will no longer doubt His willingness or ability to bless us.

When we allow ourselves to believe that God has not provided for us in the way His Word says He has, we not only run the risk of not pleasing God, but we are injuring our faith. We stop it from performing because it isn’t mixed with our believing. The most faithful in God are often hidden, like the gentleman who came out of nowhere to inspire our faith and to be a conduit of God’s love. God knows those that belong to Him, and He knows exactly where they are. He sees what we cannot see, and we should never underestimate His power, love, and provision. When our faith is firmly anchored in His goodness, God will strengthen our hearts. Never allow negativity to cause you to underestimate what God can and will do for your life. He will exceed your expectations, and a beautiful blessing might occur when you least expect it.■

Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

“When You Least Expect It”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2022. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

April 25, 2022
Good Love Starts from Within

A very good friend and sister-in-Christ told me one day, “When a man truly loves a woman, peace in the relationship will follow.” I remember thinking to myself, “How in the world did she come to this realization?” At that time in my life, I wondered what she must have gone through in her own personal relationships to finally get to this place—a place where she could see this kind of love and peace in her life as well as in her significant relationship. It wasn’t until I had gone through a few heartaches and disappointments and learned from my mistakes that I came to realize just how true her statement is. I now know with confidence that good love starts from within. This is true for us, and it’s true for the person that we desire to build a life with.

Most of us have received age-old wisdom about good love. We’ve been taught that if a person has it within themselves to honor and respect others, if they want the best for them, and has genuine compassion, this person is capable of good love. A more modern version of this wisdom is that a person that loves good will always have your back, no matter what. This is a man or woman that will give you their last and will go without, themselves, so that they can make sure you have what you need. Now, most folks today would probably say that there aren’t many people around who fit the bill for this good love. They might say they don’t come built like this anymore, but is that really true?

Luke 1:37(NLT) tells us, “For nothing is impossible with God.” God’s Word is true, and His Word never fails. When God speaks, we have the definitive authority on a subject, for everything He speaks is perfect and true. In Mark 12:30(NLT), Jesus Christ commands, “And you must love the LORD your God with all your heart, all your soul, all your mind, and all your strength.” This is the kind of love that God requires of us, and because of the Words commanded by our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, we can confidently know two things. The first is that God is good. The second thing we can know for sure is that because He made us, we are capable of giving Him good love. If you and I were not capable of loving God the way He desires to be loved, Jesus Christ would not have commanded us to do it.

The question is never if a man can give us good love. The question is whether we are giving God the love He requires. How can any of us ever have faith that we will receive good love, if we don’t have faith in our ability to give it to God? Heavenly Father has put a perfect love system in place, and 1John 4:21(NLT) gives us an important part. This verse says, “And he has given us this command: Those who love God must also love their Christian brothers and sisters.” Understand that obedience requires us to give God the good love He has empowered us to offer to Him. It is because of the good love that we give to Him that we can give it to each other. 1John 5:2(NLT) affirms this. It says, “We know we love God’s children if we love God and obey his commandments.”

Ephesians 5:2(NLT) tells us, “Live a life filled with love, following the example of Christ. He loved us and offered himself as a sacrifice for us, a pleasing aroma to God.” Jesus Christ came to the earth and modeled the perfect example of God’s love. He showed us how God’s love should be lived-out on earth. Christ is our example. Through the pattern he gave us, we learn to give good love and this same love comes back to us. It’s the love of God IN Christ IN us that starts the cycle and keeps it going. God loves us first. We accept it, then give it back to Him and others. The love cycle in Christ continues, leaving a trail of blessings wherever it goes. So, it’s not about our thoughts and opinions, it’s about believing and trusting God’s Word, and believing and trusting HIS love. It’s faith in His love that brings about His peace in our relationships.

If we put the good stuff out there, the good stuff will come back to us. The good stuff is God’s love. The love that you and I offer is sometimes based on our own personal agendas. It has strings attached to it, but not the love of God in Christ. When we make a habit pattern of loving God, wonderful things happen inside us. Our love for God gives the Holy Spirit permission to do his most perfect work within. Then, we can love others with this same unfailing, unconditional love that God has given us.

Some of us are living a reality day to day that has been shaped and molded by our own low expectations. Many of us have no interest in meeting God’s standard of love, even though He’s empowered us to get it done. And because we refuse to meet His standard, we refuse to believe that a man can love us through that standard. The darkness of this kind of wrong believing will keep us not only thinking low but settling for low.

When it comes to a man that gives good love, are our expectations limited by our lack of confidence in our own ability to give it? This deserves some thought, because good love does indeed come from within, where the love of God abides. When your relationship is right with God, your outer reality will prove it out, and you can’t help but have peace. Some folks believe that people who give good love no longer exist, that you can’t find a man that will truly have your back, but God’s Word forces us to turn the mirror on ourselves. It is impossible to love God and love others through His love, and not receive this love in return. So, when a man truly loves a woman, peace follows not so much because of what he gives, but because of what God has given to us all through Jesus Christ. Confidence in our love for God and His love for us will always end in peace. ■

Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

“Good Love Starts from Within”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2022. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

April 18, 2022
How Do I Become Born Again?

I recently had the pleasure of catching up with an old friend. We had such a good time conversing, but during our time together, the Spirit tugged on my heart. I felt compelled to witness to him about the Lord Jesus Christ. I was puzzled at first because I’ve known this person for quite some time, and I assumed he knew our wonderful Redeemer. That day, I learned a very valuable lesson. We should never assume when it comes to a person’s walk with Jesus. I came right out and asked him if he was saved. I thought he’d say, “Yes, of course I am.” Instead, he asked me, “What do you mean by ‘saved’?”

What it means to be saved
God teaches us in Romans 10:9-10(NLT), “9 If you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. 10 For it is by believing in your heart that you are made right with God, and it is by confessing with your mouth that you are saved.” Most of us hear the word ‘saved’ and think of it in very general terms. Being rescued from harm or danger immediately comes to mind. So, if a person doesn’t perceive that he or she is in immediate danger, they may not understand the staggering importance of salvation and being born again through Jesus Christ.

In truth, there is nothing more harmful or dangerous than to spend an eternity cut off from the One True Living God, and therefore being in perpetual eternal darkness and despair. It’s a fate far worse than our minds can comprehend, and this is the reality of all who are not saved through Jesus Christ.

God proclaims in Colossians 1:13-14 (NLT) that He has “rescued us from the kingdom of darkness and transferred us into the Kingdom of his dear Son, who purchased our freedom and forgave our sins.” Jesus Christ has made salvation from eternal darkness and damnation available to us, but he will not force anyone to accept the salvation he offers. Love never forces, it lovingly guides. Our beloved Savior is delighted to guide us into salvation and into his magnificent light if we are willing to be guided by him.

We must choose to love God
Genesis 1:26 tells us that God created humanity in His own image. Like Him, we are self-governing. We make our own decisions, and we get to decide who we are going to be. We decide whether we will be a child of God or a child of satan. An in between doesn’t exist. Jesus Christ makes it clear in Matthew 6:24 that we can’t serve two masters, we will love one and hate the other or vice versa, but we can’t serve both. We’re not built that way.

God has given each of us the gift of free-will, and Romans 11:29(NLT) says, “For God’s gifts and his call can never be withdrawn.” God is all-powerful, all-knowing, perfect and magnificent in every way. He never has to do a do-over or a take-back. He does things perfectly from the very beginning according to His divine design. He means for us to have what He wants to give us, and He is faithful to the gifts He gives. He will not override our free-will choice.

God offers us salvation and it is a free gift. We can’t do anything to earn it. Heavenly Father freely offers us the blessing of spending an eternity with Him through Jesus Christ. God loves us, and because of His great love, He offers us the extreme privilege and honor to choose to love Him back. John 3:16(NLT) says, “For God loved the world so much that he gave his one and only Son, so that everyone who believes in him will not perish but have eternal life.” When we were at our worse, God sent His only begotten Son to save us and give us eternal life. He did this because He loves us more than we can ever know. He wants to have a relationship with every living person, and His greatest delight is loving and sharing His Kingdom with us.

We can’t save ourselves
Roman 5:11(NLT) tells us, “So now we can rejoice in our wonderful new relationship with God because our Lord Jesus Christ has made us friends of God.” Through Jesus Christ, God has made us righteous because being righteous is necessary to be friends with God. Romans 3:25-26 The Message (MSG) tells us, “25-26 God sacrificed Jesus on the altar of the world to clear that world of sin. Having faith in him sets us in the clear. God decided on this course of action in full view of the public—to set the world in the clear with himself through the sacrifice of Jesus, finally taking care of the sins he had so patiently endured. This is not only clear, but it’s now—this is current history! God sets things right. He also makes it possible for us to live in his rightness.”

Because of what God accomplished through Jesus Christ, we now live in God’s “rightness”. It’s not that we are so good, God is the only One that is righteous and good. You and I don’t have any righteousness of our own. So, God gave us His righteousness through Christ. Sometimes people will say, “I’m not ready to have a relationship with God yet. I’m too worldly, too angry, too sinful, or too this or that…” Maybe they think they are enjoying themselves by doing all the things that pleasure their senses, but we were not created to live that way. We were created to walk in God’s Spirit! Only Jesus Christ can fill our cups and give us joy.

It’s a myth that we can make ourselves “okay enough” to come to God. We can’t. None of us can do this. For instance, some that have an addiction to a substance might think they’ll come to God when they give up the drugs or alcohol, but in reality, they find that the struggle never ends. They keep disappointing themselves and can’t understand why they can’t stop. Others might be very unhappy with their lives because they struggle with insecurities, anxieties, and fears. Spending most of their lives feeling lost, it’s challenging for them to believe that God wants to have a relationship with them; that He loves them in their brokenness and wants to help them. Before we come to Christ, we are all broken and in desperate need of God’s saving grace. We need to be cleansed by the blood of the lamb. We desperately need the new life that Jesus Christ offers us, and God wants to help us. All we have to do is come to Him and invite Him into our hearts.

You must be born again
In John 3:3(NLT), Jesus Christ had a conversation with a man named Nicodemus. He told him, “I tell you the truth, unless you are born again, you cannot see the Kingdom of God.” Just as we are birthed from our mother’s womb and have our biological father’s seed, when we accept the Lord Jesus Christ into our hearts as our Savior, we are spiritually born again. In order to be a child of God, we must be born physically, and we must be born spiritually. Accepting God’s love through Jesus Christ causes a spiritual consummation. We receive God’s seed by faith, and the Holy Spirit comes to live inside us. So, to be saved is to be born-again. It is to come alive to God spiritually as His child.

Faith is not magic, and magic doesn’t come from God. It’s not about a ‘kid in a candy store’ attitude, where God gives us anything we want. Faith is believing that God gave His only begotten Son, Jesus Christ, to save all of us, and it is believing that our all-powerful, awesome God can do anything and through His resurrection power, He raised Jesus Christ from the dead. Believing this truth, repenting from our sins, and asking God for forgiveness transfers us from eternal death to eternal life in Christ.

We’re on this earth to decide who we are going to be for the rest of eternity, and if we choose God, we must remain committed to Him. We must apologize for the sins we have committed, because sin is an offense to Him. The first Adam sinned and everyone after him sinned as well. As God’s children, we must reject Adam’s disobedience and surrender ourselves to God to be guided and led by Him.

In John 14:6(NLT), Jesus Christ declared, “I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one can come to the Father except through me.” The world would like us to believe that there are many paths to get to God. Well, it’s true that there are many paths, but they lead to destruction and idolatry. Jesus Christ is the only path to our Heavenly Father, the One True Living God. If we miss this, we’ve missed life entirely. Christ is the Prince of Life and through him, we can live an eternity with God. Ask Heavenly Father to forgive you for your sins. Ask Him to come into your life and accept His love in your heart by believing in what He has done for you through Jesus Christ. Confess your belief that Jesus Christ sacrificed his life for your sins, and that God resurrected him from the dead. Once you do this, you are saved and your spiritual journey in Christ has begun! ■

Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

Scripture taken from The Message. Copyright ©1993, 1994, 1995, 1996, 2000, 2001, 2002. Used by permission of NavPress Publishing Group.

“How Do I Become Born Again”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2022. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

April 13, 2022
When You Least Expect It

One sunny summer day, my sisters’ and I had spent the afternoon shopping. Our hands were filled with bags as we were getting in our car. My oldest sister was driving and had just gotten behind the wheel. My middle sister, the most notable shopaholic among us, was finagling bags to try and open the passenger-side door. Out of nowhere, a complete stranger approached her. He offered to help my sister, and with her permission, he opened the door, and then closed it after she was seated. Our mouths were agape as we watched him very gentlemanly assist her, and then wish us all a good afternoon. We were like, “What just happened?” Although this kindness occurred quite a number of years ago, the impact of it strikes me even today.

Whenever I mention this occurrence to others, particularly women, the comments range from, “You’ll never see that happening today…” to “Hope your bags were intact.” Isn’t it something that in the face of such a simple and beautiful act of kindness, many of us suspect the worse? It’s sad, because as daughters of our Heavenly Father, it is His desire that such kindnesses are heaped on us every day of our lives. Many of us have gone through such heartbreak and disrespect from prior relationships that we no longer expect this kind of chivalry from a man, and some of us have never experienced it to any significant degree.

And of course, there are some that ask if we ever saw him again. We didn’t, but it was enough to know that such a man exists, and he’s not the only one of his kind. I’m reminded of the record in the Old Testament, when Elijah complained to God that there were so few within His people, the children of Israel, that were faithful to God’s covenant. Elijah was in deep despair over their sinful behavior and betrayal. He knew the tremendous blessings that God had given them, and they repaid God’s kindness and grace with arrogance and sin. Elijah was weary of their shenanigans, and he tried to use their disobedience as an excuse to throw his hands up and retreat. He didn’t want to be bothered with them anymore and thought they were a useless cause. Many of God’s people had forsaken Him, and Elijah could hardly stomach seeing them ruin and run down things that they should have held sacred in their hearts and minds.

Elijah complained to God in 1Kings 19:14(NLT), “I have zealously served the LORD God Almighty. But the people of Israel have broken their covenant with you, torn down your altars, and killed every one of your prophets. I am the only one left, and now they are trying to kill me, too.” Many of us can relate somewhat to how Elijah felt. If you’ve been traveling in the ‘single’s lane’ a while, it can feel very much like no one truly understands what you’re about. They can’t match your capacity to love and don’t have the depth to walk with you through life. You might feel like Elijah, that the bottom of the barrow is what’s left, and there’s no sea of which a treasure can be found.

God told Elijah in 1Kings 19:18 that He had preserved 7,000 of His people that had not bowed to the idol, baal, or served him. Elijah made an incorrect assumption that underestimated God’s power, intelligence, and provision. Many single believers have done the same thing. God doesn’t punish us when we think this way, He helps us, but will we allow ourselves to be helped? 2Chronicles 16:9(NLT) says, “The eyes of the LORD search the whole earth in order to strengthen those whose hearts are fully committed to him.” He’s searching the entire earth, looking for a certain characteristic in our hearts, and it is the humility to trust His Word and become fully committed to our relationships with Him. When we do this, we will no longer doubt His willingness or ability to bless us.

When we allow ourselves to believe that God has not provided for us in the way His Word says He has, we not only run the risk of not pleasing God, but we are injuring our faith. We stop it from performing because it isn’t mixed with our believing. The most faithful in God are often hidden, like the gentleman who came out of nowhere to inspire our faith and to be a conduit of God’s love. God knows those that belong to Him, and He knows exactly where they are. He sees what we cannot see, and we should never underestimate His power, love, and provision. When our faith is firmly anchored in His goodness, God will strengthen our hearts. Never allow negativity to cause you to underestimate what God can and will do for your life. He will exceed your expectations, and a beautiful blessing might occur when you least expect it. ■

Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

“When You Least Expect It”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2022. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

April 6, 2022
Well Worth the Wait

My children, like most I imagine, are very inquisitive little creatures. No matter where we go, I can always count on this one question, “Where are we going?” They ask it even before they can buckle their seatbelts and then ask it while I’m driving. If they think the destination is close, they’ll ask, “How much longer before we get there?” I get a kick out of this sometimes. I like piquing their curiosity and surprising them with an unexpected destination. Our life’s journey is similar in some ways. A lot of us are asking God these same questions, but unlike our kids, many of us have lost a sense of wonder. We don’t like the unexpected, especially when it comes to waiting on the right person for our lives. We want God to give us all the details of the destination before the journey begins.

My conversation with a Christian woman the other day made me examine the relationship between our destiny and expectations more carefully. She had many expectations of God, but one of the most puzzling questions on her mind is why she hasn’t met a quality man. She has faith that God answers prayer, and she believes she’ll meet a good man one day, but the ‘when’ weighs heavily on her mind. I understand this because I had been in her shoes at one point in my life—it can feel as though you’re stranded in the Sahara Desert with no rain for years. At least, that’s how I personally felt.

Our Heavenly Father isn’t governed by our time-clock, thank goodness. His promises are built on HIS perfect timing. Psalm 84:11(NKJV) says, “For the LORD God is a sun and shield; The LORD will give grace and glory; No good thing will He withhold from those who walk uprightly.” Heavenly Father doesn’t withhold blessings. He delights in blessing His people. Each of us has a destiny in His Will and Plan, but sometimes our choices and decisions prolong the time it takes us to reach our destination.

You may have a full tank of gas in the car but if you don’t turn the key, you won’t move in any direction. The same applies to your life. We have the gift of the indwelling Holy Spirit through our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. So, our spiritual tanks are full, but if you don’t apply God’s Word to your life, you are not turning the key. How far and how long will it take you to reach your destiny if that’s your approach? The answer to this question is that we can’t get anywhere or fulfill our destinies without saturating our hearts with God’s Word. His Word works! This means if you pray for God to bless you to meet a good man, He has already put a plan in motion for your marriage. It means that the door of blessing is right in front of us, but we have a responsibility to turn the key.

There’s one thing about us human beings that Jesus Christ makes very plain, and it is the reality that we can’t focus on faith and fear at the same time. We can’t focus on having faith in God’s goodness and blessings, and at the same time focus on the fear of being lonely longer than we’d like. To focus on God’s goodness, we must keep our eyes continually on Jesus Christ. In Philippians 3:14(NLT), through the Apostle Paul, God gives us a very important component to moving ahead. He said, “I press on to reach the end of the race and receive the heavenly prize for which God, through Christ Jesus, is calling us.” This is a race that God has called us to run, and there are things that we were purposed by Him to do in this race. It is very important for us to seek God and ask Him what He requires.

When it comes to what God requires of His children, people fall into one of three categories. First, there are those they actually haven’t prayed and haven’t taken the time to ask Him what He requires. Typically, these individuals take their purpose in God’s Plan very lightly, and they may not even believe they have one. So, their vision of who they are in Christ is not on point. They are not walking in their sonship rights and true identity as a joint heir with Christ, because they don’t believe they are. If we believe in something, we will pursue it. So, not pursuing our purpose in the Plan of God is a sure indication that we don’t have faith in it. If we don’t have faith in our purpose in God’s Plan, how can we have faith in His plan for our lives when it comes to marriage?

Another category is people who have asked God what He requires of them, but they are stuck in neutral, waiting for a big event to take place. They have not demonstrated a full commitment because they become easily distracted and impatient. They stop and start repeatedly, they’re inconsistent with believing God’s Word, and they don’t realize that it’s the choices we make daily to become more like Christ that lead us continually on the path to purpose. In other words, the engine needs to be moving, and we’re are the ones to kick it in high gear. We need to open our eyes to the reality that pressing into God, clinging to His Word, and staying in continual communication with Him through prayer is the way to go. God needs to see this commitment from us.

The last category is comprised of people that are walking in their purpose within God’s Plan but might be feeling as they are losing momentum and stamina on this journey. You thought things would turn out differently. You thought you would be married, with two kids and a dog by now. But what if God is still training you for what lies ahead in your future? What if you have a few more lessons to learn? Are you going to give up on believing in His Plan for your life? Will you be patient, trust that He knows best, and have faith that He will never let you down?

Instead of letting your hope dwindle, press your foot to the ground and floor it! Recognize once and for all that you are not in charge of the race, you are responsible for running it. God is going to bless you, but don’t let your motivation and focus be determined by what you desire from Him. Let your heart be filled with the desire to please God. Keep seeking Him and keep asking Him to show you what He requires. Your unwavering commitment to do this demonstrates your love and faith, and at His appointed time, you will receive the blessing you desire. It will be well worth the wait.■

Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

“Well Worth the Wait”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2022. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

March 30, 2022
The Spark We’re Missing

My family and I were watching a movie about the story of Moses. There were many scenes in the movie that were not aligned scripturally, but we continued watching. After the movie ended, we began to discuss it and talked about when Moses met his wife, Zipporah, at the well. I was reminded of the Samaritan woman who came to draw water from Jacob’s well, and Jesus asked her for a drink. She was surprised that he asked this of her, because he was Jewish, and customarily, Jews in Jesus’s time despised the Samaritans. The Samaritans were thought to have muddied the laws of Moses by mixing them with all kind of superstitions; they watered down what the Jews held sacred. In John 4:9, she asked Jesus, “You are a Jew, and I am a Samaritan woman. Why are you asking me for a drink?” What happened next not only demonstrates the Master’s tremendous compassion and love for all, but it shows us that when the right question is asked, it can be answered in the most phenomenal way.

It cannot be lost on us that throughout his life, Jesus Christ continually received revelation knowledge from Heavenly Father. Jesus sought the Will of God, and God kept him completely informed of it. Jesus knew those that would be saved and transformed when they had no idea of it themselves. We sometimes incorrectly assume that he didn’t have a plan, or didn’t move strategically, but his steps were perfectly ordered by God, and when you and I move in Christ, so are ours. It was no coincidence that Jesus was at this well, and it was no coincidence that the Samaritan woman was there too. It was all according to God’s Will and Plan. Heavenly Father had written the Samaritan woman’s destiny. He appointed the time of her birth so that her life would be changed that day with Jesus at the well.

Something within the Samaritan woman’s spiritual DNA was triggered when she crossed paths with the Master. Make no mistake, we all have the spiritual DNA of our purpose operating within. No doubt when this woman left her home to fetch water for her family, she considered it a day like any other. There was probably no deviation from her usual routine, but Heavenly Father can take even the most mundane things in life and flip them into the miraculous. We often go on about the business of our days, not considering at all that the unveiling of our destinies will rock our worlds in an amazing way. Many of us stopped believing in this a long time ago because the enemy tricks us through distractions and disappointments, but we must understand that there’s a fuse inside us just waiting to be ignited.

After the woman inquired why he had asked her, of all people, for a drink of water, Jesus Christ replied in John 4:10(NLT), “If you only knew the gift God has for you and who you are speaking to, you would ask me, and I would give you living water.” Imagine meeting someone you’ve never met before, and this person offers you something you’ve never had before. You might not know quite how to respond, and you might also relegate it to the “too good to be true” category. Even so, whenever we hear someone speak of something promising, somewhere in our hearts, wheels start turning. This is what happened to the woman at the well. The thought of having a kind of water that would prevent the daily toil of fetching and carrying it back to the village would have been a game changer for her. Even without the slightest scrutiny, she entertained that it could be possible.

What about us? What if someone said to you, “I have a friend that wants to meet you very much. He’s saved, financially stable, intelligent, compassionate, loving, hard-working, loyal, and handsome.” Even if you think there’s no way a man with a package containing all those characteristics is about to step into your life that easily, you can’t help but to entertain it. Odds are that your next step is to dig a little deeper. Even though a big part of you isn’t buying in, you still want to question the person who proposed this introduction. You want to find out if there’s even the slightest chance that the person making the introduction is on the up-and-up, and if the man they described is the answer to your prayers.

We are wired by God, our Creator, to trust in the wonderful. The challenges and tribulations of life sometimes shroud it, but underneath the pain of the disappointments that we’ve suffered is still the willingness to believe in the extraordinary. Many of us have been tricked before, especially those who have endured the hurt of broken relationships and have fallen for men that have not held up their end of the bargain. The thing is, we thought they had living water, and we refused to hold ourselves accountable for trying to drink from an empty well.

Jesus Christ doesn’t offer us empty promises. He’s the Real Deal! The living water that he gives us will quench our thirst for an entire eternity. Have we responded to this magnanimous gift with the same zeal as the possibility of meeting a new man? The record of the woman at the well begs us to examine ourselves, because the spark we’re missing can’t be ignited by a new beau or boo. Sure, we might be happy for a few weeks or months, but that excitement, like all things in the world, soon wanes. Of course, Heavenly Father wants to bless every person that desires to be married with a loving and supportive spouse. He wants this more for us than we want it for ourselves, but just as Jesus Christ knew everything about the woman and her promiscuous past, He knows about our past as well. He knows when deep in our hearts, we are not treasuring and honoring the things of God the way we should. We’re not as excited about His living water as we are about other things.

John 4:23-26(NLT) lets us in on the conversation that continued between our Lord and Savior and the Samaritan woman. This passage says, “23 But the time is coming—indeed it’s here now—when true worshipers will worship the Father in spirit and in truth. The Father is looking for those who will worship him that way. 24 For God is Spirit, so those who worship him must worship in spirit and in truth.” 25 The woman said, “I know the Messiah is coming—the one who is called Christ. When he comes, he will explain everything to us.” 26 Then Jesus told her, “I AM the Messiah!”” Here was a woman that saw sin as her ticket to happiness, and yet our Lord and Savior had compassion and revealed his identity to her. Initially, she asked why he had chosen her to ask for a drink, and the answer is revealed to all of us in God’s Word. Jesus wants us to recognize that our greatest need isn’t marriage or a relationship with a significant person. It is to have a relationship with God through Jesus Christ. It’s to worship God in Spirit and in truth, and to realize that only He can fill our cups with living water. ■

Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

“The Spark We’re Missing” written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2022. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

March 16, 2022