Find A Christian Man

Author: findchristianman

  • Listen Up!

    Listen Up!

    I had a conversation the other day with someone I’ve known for many years. She’s been keeping herself busy with her newly remodeled bathroom, a hefty project she undertook to take her mind off things. Not being able to see many of her friends and family during the pandemic has been particularly tough on her. She also mentioned that she’s started to date again. Her two-year relationship ended a year ago, and she’s trying not to make the same mistakes twice. Hopeful and more aware, she said to me, “I have promised myself that the next relationship I’m in, I’ll do more listening than talking.”

    James 1:19-24 The Message (MSG) tells us, “Post this at all the intersections, dear friends: Lead with your ears, follow up with your tongue, and let anger straggle along in the rear. God’s righteousness doesn’t grow from human anger. So throw all spoiled virtue and cancerous evil in the garbage. In simple humility, let our gardener, God, landscape you with the Word, making a salvation-garden of your life. Don’t fool yourself into thinking that you are a listener when you are anything but, letting the Word go in one ear and out the other. Act on what you hear! Those who hear and don’t act are like those who glance in the mirror, walk away, and two minutes later have no idea who they are, what they look like.”

    God gives us specific instructions in this passage. It’s the good stuff we need to digest for the significant relationship we hope to have and make last. Heavenly Father tells us to lead with our ears, to listen first, and then use a wise economy of words second. Many of us have failed to do this and have paid a hefty price in our relationships. You can’t be an effective communicator if you lack the patience to be a good listener. Many of us are not attentive in this area, and because we haven’t been good listeners, some of us have left an impression of arrogance and stubbornness instead of humility and compassion. We can change this, and we should.

    In today’s world, often the primary objective is to make sure your point comes across and that you are heard loud and clear. It’s not hard to see why many believe that listening to others has become a lost art. Listening is more than just hearing; it’s being attentive to details and taking in what is being communicated in a way that is thoughtful, respectful, and appreciative of points of views that are different than your own. Most of us have either experienced or witnessed the frustration of trying to convey something that is important to us, and the person we’re speaking to isn’t receiving what we’re communicating. Instead, they may talk over you, don’t allow you to finish your sentences, become angry or totally shut down and refuse to further communicate. This kind of temperament isn’t sustainable in a relationship.

    Psalm 25:9(NLT) says, “He leads the humble in doing right, teaching them his way.” God will always lead those who desire to be led. It takes humility to please Him and to allow our lives to be guided by His nature. Learning the patience, compassion, and thoughtfulness to become a good listener is required for marital preparation and becoming the kind of spouse that God desires. The practice of listening is crucial to maintaining our relationship with Heavenly Father, and it is very important for maintaining our relationships with our future spouses. We must be committed hearers and doers of the Word of God. Our humility to listen to His instruction and follow the example of Christ will help us to be attentive and compassionate listeners in our marital relationships. ■

    Scripture taken from The Message. Copyright ©1993, 1994, 1995, 1996, 2000, 2001, 2002. Used by permission of NavPress Publishing Group.

    Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

    “Listen Up!”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2022. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

  • Eat the Bitterness or the Sweetness of Life

    Eat the Bitterness or the Sweetness of Life

    Before I moved away from my old neighborhood, I was blessed with very loving and kind neighbors, an elderly couple that lived across the street. They were married over sixty years and had raised two very successful sons that moved to other states to establish their respective families. I learned so much from this couple about unity, marriage, and raising a family. They talked frequently about how much they valued God’s peace and their love for His standards. With two years between them, when they first met, she was twenty-one years old and he was twenty-three. She said she fell in love with his quiet spirit and the consistent manner in which he pursued her. They’ve passed on from this life, but the lesson I learned from them about the standard of consistency is one I pray will bless you as much as it did me.

    My grandmother would say, “God don’t bless no mess.” She would say this when church folk would behave unGodly, yet they expected to move in the blessings of God. As many of us go through our everyday lives, we don’t give this much thought, but we must never forget that God holds us to a standard. As part of our spiritual discipline and practice, we must constantly hold ourselves to the scrutiny of the example of Christ contained in God’s Word.

    2Corinthians 13:5(NIV) tells us, “Examine yourselves to see whether you are in the faith; test yourselves. Do you not realize that Christ Jesus is in you—unless, of course, you fail the test?” This testing of ourselves isn’t offered in 2Corinthians 13:5 as a suggestion. It’s a requirement. Our journey in Christ is one of learning, forgiveness, humility, and correction. Our blessings are tied to these four, and learning, forgiveness, humility, and correction all breed the kind of consistency God is looking to see in us. We must examine ourselves using them as our barometer, because this can point to why our blessings might be delayed.

    Nothing in a person’s life happens randomly. God allowed this couple to be in my life to teach me spiritual lessons I needed to learn for my journey in Christ. It is impossible to grow in Christ and excel in his faith without saturating our minds with knowledge about him. The more we know about him, the more like him we become, and this is God’s goal and standard for our lives. If we get away from this, we step outside the boundaries of God’s plan. And if we step outside the boundaries of God’s plan and purpose, instead of being attracted to us, blessings are repelled.

    Heavenly Father blesses His Word. Whenever and wherever His Word is obeyed and trusted, His blessings will abound. James 1:5(NIV) tells us, “If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.”  Some of us never think to ask Him to show us where and when we’re not clinging to His Word, but this is where we should place a great deal of focus. And not only should we ask Him to reveal how and when we’ve gotten off track, but we should position ourselves to receive the truth of what He will reveal. Sometimes this truth isn’t comfortable. In fact, in most instances it convicts us, but the conviction is good for our souls because it shows we are humble and teachable. It shows we are willing to correct ourselves in the areas where we’ve fallen short.

    Romans 10:17 tells us that faith comes by hearing the Word of God. Faith cannot come by any other means. We must hear and digest the knowledge that is going to help us correct those habits and behaviors that keep us from walking in faith and truth. Proverbs 1:31-32(NIV) tells us, “31 they will eat the fruit of their ways and be filled with the fruit of their schemes. 32 For the waywardness of the simple will kill them, and the complacency of fools will destroy them;” This passage shows us that our lives are molded and shaped based on the patterns and behaviors we have. Our attitudes, thoughts, conversations, confessions, and behaviors will increase either our blessings or our bitterness. We eat the fruit from our choices, and the bellies of our lives will be filled by the plans we hatch to do good or wrong. So, we can’t afford to let the lessons of consistency in our allegiance to God slip by. These lessons give us spiritual strength and help us in all our relationships, especially marriage.

    The couple I loved so dearly told me that even when they were both so young, they had a strong sense of right and wrong. They valued treating people the way they wanted to be treated. As God’s people, we can never venture too far from the purity of this standard. As women of faith, we can’t afford to sleep on the reality that a man will show us his standard right from the very beginning. He will pursue us consistently and cling to the Godliness we have cultivated in our womanhood. This is why we must be ever so careful to seek God now and work this out within our hearts and minds, because doing so makes sure we are laying up treasures in heaven and setting ourselves up for the sweetness of God’s rewards. ■

    Holy Bible, New International Version®, NIV® Copyright ©1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc.® Used by permission. All rights reserved worldwide.

    “Eat the Bitterness or the Sweetness of Life”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2022. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

  • Balance Requires the Right Measurement

    Balance Requires the Right Measurement

    When the Children of Israel were in the wilderness, God fed them manna from heaven. 2Corinithans 3:5 tells us that God is our sufficiency. He takes care of our every need. He does this for each of us, and He did it for His people that were living during Old Testament times. The scriptures tell us that the manna God rained from heaven completely nourished the people. None of them got sick and they had plenty to feed their families. The truth we need to digest from this wonderful record of God’s provision is that He hasn’t changed. He’s the same yesterday, today, and forever. Modern day thinking has caused some to conclude that when it comes to His provision, marriage is excluded, but this isn’t the truth. If there’s any semblance of this notion in our minds and hearts, we need to abolish those thoughts and renew our minds to God’s Word.

    God has given us His Word so that we can walk with Him and learn to structure our lives so that we walk in His truth and not become blinded by the tricks of the devil. Numbers 23:19(NLT) tells us, “God is not a man, so he does not lie. He is not human, so he does not change his mind.” Modern times may bring higher levels of intelligence and convenience, but God is not moved by any of it. We are modernized only to the extent that He allows us access to His wisdom through Jesus Christ. History has proven that as we know more, we think of more clever ways to destroy one another and turn our backs on God. As believers, we can never allow humanity’s advances to cause the truth of God’s goodness and sovereignty to slip in our minds and hearts.

    Marriage is the institution God set up from the very beginning, with Adam and Eve. Marriage belongs to Him, and He has given it to us because it serves His plan and purpose. Heavenly Father is not like us. We vacillate constantly with our plans, intentions, and desires; but God never does. Marriage is a blessing, and again, like all blessings, it belongs to God. We are absolutely in right standing to pray in the powerful name of Jesus Christ for this blessed union to come to pass in our lives.

    Some of us think and pray for marriage as if it’s a new thing that God has to do in our lives. Marriage has already been established in His Word as part of His Will. It is as organic and natural to life as breathing. Many have tried to take marriage outside the boundaries of God’s plan, and they are missing the blessing altogether. It would be absurd to think for one moment that God doesn’t know the best person for our lives and hasn’t included this in His plan for us. He knows us far better than we could ever know ourselves, and there are some qualities in our personhood that have yet to mature. There are areas where we should have grown beyond the baby’s milk stage, but we haven’t. It impossible for God to fail and He never makes a mistake. Marriage will naturally come into our lives when walking in His Will through Jesus Christ is the greatest desire of our lives. This is the level of spiritual maturity that puts out the welcome mat for God’s treasures.

    In many instances, many single believers are out of balance when it comes to their expectations for marriage. They want to receive much but give little, and of course, none of us will ever admit to such a thing, but the reality is that being out of balance in this way will not allow for the kind of spiritual maturity marriage requires. In Exodus 16:16-20(NLT), God has given us a tremendous example of how He views balance. This passage tells us, “16 These are the LORD’s instructions: Each household should gather as much as it needs. Pick up two quarts for each person in your tent.” 17 So the people of Israel did as they were told. Some gathered a lot, some only a little. 18 But when they measured it out, everyone had just enough. Those who gathered a lot had nothing left over, and those who gathered only a little had enough. Each family had just what it needed. 19 Then Moses told them, “Do not keep any of it until morning.” 20 But some of them didn’t listen and kept some of it until morning. But by then it was full of maggots and had a terrible smell. Moses was very angry with them.”

    An understanding of God’s Will and Word regarding His provision is absolutely critical. Singledom comes with all kinds of lists, tips, questions, and analysis, and these all claim to move the dial further along. Some of them might actually be helpful, but the reality is that faith comes by hearing the Word of God. Faith requires truth, and only the truth will bring the victory Christ has given us. When we lack the humility to deliver everything over to God, we are prioritizing our agenda over His. We begin asking for all kinds of qualities and characteristics in the person we will marry, when we ourselves are not equal to what we’re asking for. We want someone loving, compassionate, loyal, and generous, when some of us haven’t worked those fruits into our own lives sufficiently.

    God told the people, “Gather what you NEED.” It’s obvious from their actions that they couldn’t be trusted to be true to their own needs. They took more than they needed, and this brought about a stench that the Father would not tolerate. Here’s the thing we can’t afford to miss; God knew their needs, and this was spiritually and perfectly calculated into His provision. Please make sure you don’t miss the revelation of this awesome truth. Because God’s provision could in no way be manipulated, those that gathered a lot, had nothing left, and those that didn’t gather enough had just what they needed.

    The gratitude and understanding of God’s perfection and sovereignty cannot be out of place when we are desiring marriage. The desire for marriage is not outside of God’s Will. It is a benefit of being in His Will. He, and He alone, takes care of what’s in His Will. ■

    English Standard Version (ESV)
    The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. ESV® Text Edition: 2016. Copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers.

    Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

    “Balance Requires the Right Measurement”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2022. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

  • Praying to Cross His Path

    Praying to Cross His Path

    For a single Christian woman that is praying to cross paths with her future husband, if you haven’t met him yet, then you’re still in the process of spiritual preparation. You still have the awesome privilege to continue receiving guidance and instruction from the Holy Spirit. He prepares you to be the wife that God wants you to be. Many single sisters in Christ have questioned this. They don’t understand why spiritual preparation is necessary for marriage, and if it is, why is it taking so long? Spiritual preparation consists of the steps we take through Jesus Christ to be strengthened in his faith, power, and ability. Jesus Christ teaches in Luke 12:48 that to whom much is given much is required. Heavenly Father has called each of us to be good stewards of His blessings, and we certainly can’t satisfy this if we lack the spiritual strength and maturity to get it done.

    Hebrews 11:6 (NKJV) says, “But without faith it is impossible to please Him, for he who comes to God must believe that He is, and that He is a rewarder of those who diligently seek Him.” Diligently seeking God is required to receive His rewards. Anything less than what He requires will not do. Believers and unbelievers alike attempt to butt up against this truth, but it is unyielding. God has a plan for each of us. Age, background, status, or any other human standard doesn’t matter. The Will of God requires that our feet are firmly planted on the path to God’s purpose in order to receive His rewards. One of the ways we ensure we’re on this path is to examine and correct the actions we’re taking to make room for the husband we hope to meet.

    Don’t be a wanderer
    The children of Israel wandered around in circles in the desert for 40 years because they couldn’t get on board with having faith in God. Heavenly Father’s Word tells us that they were so indoctrinated with the mindset of their prior enslavement that they wouldn’t handle the task of changing their thought paradigm. The practice of wandering was more comfortable to them than the practice of reaching and stretching forth to newness. They refused to release old dead things, and therefore were ill-prepared with the spiritual strength to reach out and grab what God promised. It was their responsibility to prepare, and they refused to do it. Because of this refusal, those who would not change did not receive the promise.

    God is perfect, and so is His path and purpose. The plan He has for your life is a good plan, but it is in no way arbitrary or random. We can’t do whatever we want to do and expect that it fulfills our call. The question to ask is whether we have the humility to ask God what He requires us to do and whether we have the patience to wait for His answer. We can’t keep wandering, being inconsistent and vacillating back and forth in our obligation to the faith. God requires more of us, and we must seek Him and be guided by Him to achieve His purpose. Our spiritual growth in Christ is what’s most important to God, and He is going to require us to lean into Him in a greater way and to step outside our comfort zones to seek His purpose.

    Don’t misuse the gift
    1Corinthians 7:3-5 (NLT) says,“3 The husband should fulfill his wife’s sexual needs, and the wife should fulfill her husband’s needs. 4 The wife gives authority over her body to her husband, and the husband gives authority over his body to his wife. 5 Do not deprive each other of sexual relations, unless you both agree to refrain from sexual intimacy for a limited time so you can give yourselves more completely to prayer. Afterward, you should come together again so that Satan won’t be able to tempt you because of your lack of self-control.”

    We can think, say, and feel however we like on the subject of sexual intimacy, but God is the only One who can set the standard for how this aspect of marriage should be handled. Whether we want to admit it or not, corporately, we’re paying a hefty price for taking what God ordained for marriage and using it for quick pleasure with individuals that were never destined to be our spouses. Heavenly Father specifically tells us in 1Corinthians 7:4 that a woman has authority over her body. He commands that she give this authority to her husband, and the husband will do the same. In your quiet time, make a mental note of the individuals that were not your husband, yet you gave them this authority in the past. Forgive yourself for your errors in judgement, but most importantly, repent for misusing the gift of your incredible womanhood to appease someone who didn’t honor you the way Christ does.

    The husband that God has ordained for your destiny is worthy of the authority you are commanded by God to give him. Now is the time to honor your future husband, even though you may not have crossed his path. Make a commitment that you will not give to another what belongs to him alone.

    Marriage belongs to God, don’t try to take it
    Loneliness, isolation, unfulfilled desires and dreams, these are among the many things that can make us feel sad. Understand with all that you are that there is no cure for all that makes us sad outside of Jesus Christ. He is the answer and following him leads us to freedom in every area of our lives. All things have been placed under his feet, and this includes marriage. It doesn’t matter how many dating sites a single person has signed up for, if the person she meets isn’t aligned with God’s plan for her life, this person will not be the blessing she hopes he will be.

    Marriage belongs to God. It brings glory to Him or else He would not have sanctioned it. How much faith do you have in the institution of marriage that God has ordained, and how willing are you to change in order to have the kind of marriage God wants you to have? Jesus Christ is our example, and this example is not outdated in the least bit. The example of Christ is life for us, and we can only access the more than abundant life by living in and through him. Are you willing and able to offer another individual the love of Christ in such a way that they are inspired to keep him continually at the center of their lives? Even if you’re not quite there, you must be on your way. The spiritual disciplines you practice must be firmly anchored in your everyday life, so that you are not moved from Christ, no matter who loves you or who doesn’t.

    Make no mistake, God is more committed to preserve and protect you than you are to preserve and protect yourself. He knows that the wrong person can cause you dreadful harm and the right person can cause you tremendous good. Make sure you never attempt to take what belongs to God and make it your own. Don’t try to get ahead of the Holy Spirit, for that is always a reckless and futile endeavor. Focus on God by staying in His Word, praying often, and following the example of Christ. Heavenly Father knows how to bless us with marriage. He does it His way, and His way alone. Be dutiful to stay in your lane. Honor the privilege and responsibility to remain spiritually prepared for what God has in store. ■

    Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

    “Praying to Cross His Path”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2022. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

  • Looking Like A Trick Or A Blessing

    Looking Like A Trick Or A Blessing

    I heard a young man talk about his perception of how a Godly woman behaves verses how a woman of the world behaves. A woman of the world is a woman that adopts society’s standards over God’s standards. She loves what the world loves, and she hates what the world hates. A Godly woman is a woman who lives according to the standard and example of Christ; she loves what God loves. Well, this young man said he believes social media plays a major role in a woman’s identity these days, even down to the way she dresses. He believes that many Godly women are abdicating God’s standard and allowing them to be eroded in their lives. Like me, I’m sure you’ve heard these criticisms. Some of our veterans have complained that Christian women are wearing revealing clothes that suggest they are everything but a woman of God. It’s not a new practice to allow clothing to make a statement about who we are or how we want to be perceived. However, we can never escape the reality that the benefits of being and looking Godly will forever outweigh those of being and looking sexy.

    1Peter 2:9-10(NLT) tells us, “9 But you are not like that, for you are a chosen people. You are royal priests, a holy nation, God’s very own possession. As a result, you can show others the goodness of God, for he called you out of the darkness into his wonderful light. 10 “Once you had no identity as a people; now you are God’s people. Once you received no mercy; now you have received God’s mercy.” Heavenly Father makes it clear that we are to present ourselves in such a way that our appearance matches our identity. He accepts us as we are, but He’s also happy when we look our best, and He wants us to have the best. Our mission should not be to glorify the flesh, but to glorify God in all that we do. We are commanded to show others the goodness of God. As God’s daughters, the world’s standard should not be dictating how we dress when it comes to pleasing God with our appearance. We should be leaning on the Spirit, and our hearts should be sensitive enough to perceive the Spirit’s conviction when we’re not on point.

    In the Old Testament, when God established His tabernacle on earth, He set apart a high priest. This high priest was designated and responsible for bringing the people’s sins before the Lord, he would seek God’s forgiveness on their behalf. The Old Testament outlines how very specific God is about the details, and they had to be followed to the letter, or else the priest would die instantly. God’s instructions specified the duties, requirements, and even the clothing for the priest, right down to the colors of purple, scarlet, and blue. The artisans had to be skilled and they had to capture the majesty that God specifically wanted to be conveyed. The message is clear that how we represent ourselves to the world means something to God, therefore, it ought to mean something to us as well.

    At the end of the day, we are all going to do what we want, and we wear what we feel is right for us, but we have to ask ourselves which do we want to be the focus, our Godliness or how our outfit accentuates our curves. Can we have it both ways?  2 Corinthians 5:10(ESV) tells us, “For we must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ, so that each one may receive what is due for what he has done in the body, whether good or evil.” We’re on the earth for just a little while, and we need to make it count towards the purpose for which God has assigned. If something isn’t going to help us achieve the goals and rewards of Godly living, what’s the point?

    All of us want a blessing from Heavenly Father. And in our preparation of receiving one of His treasures, we must consider the reality that everything that looks like a blessing isn’t one. Sometimes it is a trick from satan to swindle us out of the real blessing that God has for us. We shouldn’t want to cast our poles in a big pond and hook the wrong fish. By the same token, we, ourselves, shouldn’t want to look like a trick rather than looking like the Proverbs 18:22 treasure God desires us to be. We must not be deceived, the enemy wants to kill, steal, and destroy God’s people, and he looks for an opening in our lives. And yes, sometimes it can be a worldly habit or pattern of behavior that we continually indulge that causes the doors to our lives to swing open, giving satan the opportunity to pounce and devour. We can be smarter than this, and we should.

    The times have indeed changed, but God never changes, neither does His Word or His standards. God warns us in Philippians 2:3(NLT), “Don’t be selfish; don’t try to impress others. Be humble, thinking of others as better than yourselves.” There’s nothing wrong with being sharp as all get out, and having that hair and makeup game tight, but not to the point where humility has taken a backseat, and others can’t perceive God’s grace because of the noise of our appearance. No matter where we go or what we do, our appearance and how we dress makes a statement. We would do well to make sure that it’s a statement that magnifies the goodness, purity, and holiness of God. ■

    English Standard Version (ESV)
    The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. ESV® Text Edition: 2016. Copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers.

    Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

    “Looking Like A Trick Or A Blessing”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2022. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

  • I Want All of You, Forever

    I Want All of You, Forever

    Romantic movies have had a big impact on the way many of us view relationships between men and women. We are captivated by the lengths the leading male character will go to in order to show and prove his love for the female lead. Most of us long for this kind of romance with the person we hope to marry. In one of the romantic movies I watched recently, the man said something along the lines of, “I know it isn’t going to be easy. Sometimes it will be really hard, and we’ll have to work at this every day, but I want to do this more than I’ve ever wanted anything in my life. I want you. I want all of you, forever. I want it to be you and me.” The actor said this with such emotion and depth that your heart just melted. You couldn’t help but ask yourself, “What would I do if someone said that to me and actually meant it?”

    We want so desperately for another human being to show us this kind of love, but the truth is that this is exactly how Jesus Christ feels about us. He said in John 15:13(KJV), “Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends.” He loves us so intensely that nothing on earth compares and nothing can ever separate us from His love, for all eternity. God has given us the creativity and imaginations to produce such things as romance novels and movies. They help us to grow in our appreciation and gratitude for the level of love that He has for us all.

    Falling in love gives us ooey gooey feelings of sweetness, but as yummy as it is, it doesn’t really capture the essence of the love of Christ. Jesus commands us to love each other with his kind of love, because his brand of love is everlasting. His brand of love will cause us to put the welfare of others before our own. Jesus Christ invites us to try his kind of love on for size so we can see that it fits. He wants us to get excited about it, because if we’ve accepted him in our hearts, we carry his brand of love with us everywhere we go. We can love just the way he loves.

    Ephesians 5:2(NLT) tells us to, “Live a life filled with love, following the example of Christ. He loved us and offered himself as a sacrifice for us, a pleasing aroma to God.” Movies aren’t real, but the love of God in Christ is more real than anything that exists. It is because of this love that you and I are living today. We can enjoy a romantic movie and be entertained and sometimes enriched by them. But we can only experience this enrichment because our Lord and Master set the precedent. We recognize intense love in a movie, because the real life and technicolor truth of the love of Jesus Christ saved us and rescued us from darkness.

    Typically, when people make the choice to “fall-in” love, they are forming a bond. Before they even make a lasting commitment, they give their hearts to one another. They don’t recognize that people can fall out of love as quickly and effortlessly as they fall in love. The problem with a ‘falling-in-and-out’ love is that it comes in limited supply. It doesn’t last. A person hopes that the memory of what they shared in the beginning of the relationship is enough to under-gird the storms that come a bit later. The divorce rate suggests this doesn’t happen all the time.

    Romantic love is subject to our own interpretation. It’s defined differently for each person, and it is based on how we choose to respond to someone and how they choose to respond to us. The love of Christ isn’t dependent on give and take. It isn’t based on conditions and circumstances. When Christ dwells in our hearts, we become a part of him. Colossians 3:3(NLT) tells us, “For you died to this life, and your real life is hidden with Christ in God.” So then, the love of God in Christ is not just how we respond to others, the love of God in Christ is who we are. Through Christ, we become the embodiment of God’s love. His love helps us to discern and gives us the wisdom to look to Him for what is best for our lives.

    All of us have enjoyed a good romance novel or movie from time to time. I personally like them very much, but it’s really important that we know the difference between infatuation and the kind of love that holds a relationship together for a lifetime. Colossians 2:10 affirms that we are complete through our union with Christ, who is the head over every ruler, power, and authority that exists. Only the love of Christ can make us complete, and you and I must be grounded in his love. God tells us in Colossians 2:7(NLT) to, “Let your roots grow down into him, and let your lives be built on him. Then your faith will grow strong in the truth you were taught, and you will overflow with thankfulness.” At the very core of our beings, we must be rooted in Christ. When we are, we will give the kind of love that honors God through Christ, and we can be confident that it will be the kind of love we receive. ■

    Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

    “I Want All of You, Forever”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2022. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

  • Only One Person Gets the Prize

    Only One Person Gets the Prize

    1Corinthians 9:24(NIV) says, “Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one gets the prize? Run in such a way as to get the prize.” All good athletes are disciplined when it comes to their training. One of the defining characteristics about an athlete is they all know they need to train. And they understand that they are not just training for nothing; they are training to win the prize. Even if they only achieve silver medal status, with everything in them, they are training to win the gold. This must be our approach as believers. The eyes of God are upon us, and we should do everything to the best of our ability to please Him. We are on this earth to win the gold, which is highest calling of Jesus Christ. So regardless of what you are believing God to receive, there are elements that He has laid out in 1Corinthians 9:24 that are pivotal to the mindset of pleasing Him and achieving victory in any area of our lives.

    Strict Training
    As we look around at what is happening in our world today, it doesn’t really give us warm, cozy feelings of sweetness; its hardcore stuff going down. As victorious sons and daughters of God, this should serve as a reminder to us that life is not a game. It’s nothing to take lightly. Spiritual warfare is real, and it is taking place before our very eyes. But even with the backdrop of chaos and confusion, God will keep us if we want to be kept. He will protect us, provide for us, and keep us in His perfect peace. He will place a hedge around us if we are faithful to His Word.

    In 1Corinthians 9:25(NIV), the Apostle Paul said, “Everyone who competes in the games goes into strict training. They do it to get a crown that will not last, but we do it to get a crown that will last forever.” The earth is training ground for the child of God. This is STRICT training down here! It’s for an everlasting crown, so there’s no foolery tolerated. If a person makes the choice not to be guided by the Holy Spirit, and they refuse to obey God’s Word, their lives are in serious danger. Some people leave this earth prematurely, and it is because they will not recognize that strict equates to diligence, and a diligent commitment is something God requires.

    Losing focus loses the race
    Jesus Christ said in Matthew 6:8(NLT), “For your Father knows the things you have need of before you ask Him.” When you pray repeatedly to cross paths with your future husband, and you pray that your future hubby will spiritually recognize you as his future wife, you must know that God heard you the first time you prayed. You are not praying repeatedly for the same request because you think God is hard of hearing. You are praying repeatedly to demonstrate your diligence and to get your own mind and heart lined up with the blessing you are asking to receive. God knows what we need before we even recognize the need ourselves. He doesn’t need to make any adjustments to give you what you’ve prayed to receive. We are the ones that must adjust.  

    Paul said in 1Corinthians 9:25(NIV), “Therefore I do not run like someone running aimlessly; I do not fight like a boxer beating the air.” A boxer who beats the air never lands a punch towards his or her target. This is what happens when we’re not focusing on God by living the example of Christ. Your focus cannot be the man, it must always be God. Some women are only going through the motions of spiritual discipline to appease God temporarily, thinking this is how they will get what they want. Their hearts are far from Him, and He knows their true motives. The prize will forever and always be a life in the Lord Jesus Christ. Rewards and blessings come from honoring God for the true prize of living forever in Christ.

    Hebrews 11:6(NLT) tells us, “But without faith it is impossible to please Him, for he who comes to God must believe that He is, and that He is a rewarder of those who diligently seek Him.” Your mind and heart must be committed to God. This is what the training is all about. It’s learning to become like Christ; this is always the goal. As we grow in one area, another area where growth is needed will come into view. We must be diligent to recognize when we have erred in our feelings, attitudes, and behaviors. Then we must repent and pray to the Father to help us be better. This is diligence, and it must be a habit pattern.

    Don’t be disqualified
    The Apostle Paul understood what it takes to run the race God has set before each of us and win it. He knew that it is God who fights our external battles. Our mission is to stand, believe, and trust Him, so that when He tells us to move, we know exactly what to do and how to do it. You are the one to fight the internal battle in your mind and heart. You must fight to trust God, and this means that you might have to give up some things. You might have to leave some things behind. Letting go of some relationships, people, and other things in our comfort zones will back our faith. It demonstrates that you wholeheartedly believe that the blessing you will receive infinitely outweighs what you have let go.

    You may have a vision of how your relationship should be. You might have a picture in your mind of how the man will look, but every detail of your agenda must be swapped out for God’s agenda. He knows what is best, and your faith in this is non-negotiable. Don’t disqualify yourself from the race by putting limits on God. Don’t yield to your flesh because you think the person is the right fit. Yield to God with humility and a commitment to do what He asks of you. He is in charge of the prize. He has told us how to receive it, and it is guaranteed when we run in such a way as to receive it. ■

    Holy Bible, New International Version®, NIV® Copyright ©1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc.® Used by permission. All rights reserved worldwide.

    Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

    “Only One Person Gets the Prize”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2022. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

  • Baby Steps Will Yield Big Results

    Baby Steps Will Yield Big Results

    There was a time in my life when I celebrated the blessing of a new year with a long list of resolutions. Why did I put all that pressure on myself? I missed so much of the joy of newness by overwhelming my efforts with unreasonable expectations. Things like getting back into the gym, traveling more, and learning a new language were just a few things on my list. They were admirable goals and aspirations, but by the end of the year, many of my resolutions had not materialized in the way I expected. This felt like failure to me, and that’s not a helpful outlook. The truth will always come to us when we demonstrate that we are ready to hear it. So, after years of doing resolutions with minimal results, I sat down with pen and paper in hand, and prepared to ask myself some brutally honest questions. I didn’t have all the answers, but I knew they would come. When they did, it hit me like a ton of bricks. Baby steps was the way to go, and I needed to pray and ask the Father for guidance about which ones to take.

    One of my friends shared her New Year’s Resolutions List with me and preparing to meet her future husband was in the number one spot. I could be wrong, but I don’t think baby steps are anywhere on her radar. She wants to take a deep dive plunge, and my hunch is that many single women are right there with her. They are looking to meet their future husbands, but like my friend, they probably haven’t given a whole lot of thought to exactly what it will take to make this a reality. Our approach to resolutions is typically about what we can do externally. We rarely think about the mental, emotional, and most importantly, the spiritual practices required for change. There’s an old saying that you can’t get different results by doing the same things you’ve always done. No doubt most of us have heard this statement, but God says it best. He tells us in Ephesians 4:23(NIV), “be made new in the attitude of your minds.”

    When it comes to preparing for newness of any kind, our minds are key. Before there can be a change in our hearts, there must be a change in our minds. We must always remember this because everyone that we encounter will either respond or not respond to us based on what’s in our hearts. In other words, if we haven’t changed the way we think, then we haven’t changed what’s operating in our hearts. Many women may have already crossed the path of their future husbands, but because the woman’s heart hasn’t changed, he does not respond to her in the way that he could. So, we have to address the condition of our hearts, and we need to do it through God’s guidance and direction.

    In truth, the first place to prepare to receive a blessing from the Lord begins in our hearts. This is where resolutions take root. It’s where our blessings begin their journey to manifestation. Baby steps are the ones we take to find our best course of action to build our faith, so that our confessed desires can become a reality. These steps begin within, they start with our willingness to be guided by the Spirit.

    Jesus Christ said in John 16:13(NLT), “When the Spirit of truth comes, he will guide you into all truth. He will not speak on his own but will tell you what he has heard. He will tell you about the future.” The Holy Spirit lives inside every born-again believer, and his occupation is to comfort, guide, and teach us the truth. He is going to give us information that is from Jesus Christ, and this information is beneficial for the purpose for which we were created. When it comes to your desires, hypothetically, it is possible that you wanted to be a Rocket Scientist. You may have held this desire throughout your youth, but after you finished nursing school, as an adult, you realized that being a Rocket Scientist was not your destiny. God’s Will for your life was to become a nurse, so that you could help those He ordained you to minister to. This is His call upon your life being fulfilled. As admirable as the profession maybe, you were led by the Spirit to become a nurse, not a Rocket Scientist. The Spirit led you according to the Will of God for your life, and you humbled yourself to be led. Resolution should work the very same way.

    Resolutions represent ambitions and aspirations that are not yet realized. They are unrealized because we have surmised that they will require a more focused and consistent effort to transform from an idea to a reality. They will require more from us, Jesus Christ tells us this in Luke 12:48, where he said, “When someone has been given much, much will be required in return; and when someone has been entrusted with much, even more will be required.” So, if we’re asking more of life, we should also be asking ourselves how to prepare for it, because it will require more from us. We will have to give and do more than we have in the past, and we must get our minds and hearts on board.

    Some of us try to make our minds do things they are not designed to do. We try to make them change and expand without the spiritual mechanisms God designed to accomplish this. Romans 10:17 tells us that faith comes from hearing and perceiving the Word of God. A spiritual transaction occurs when we hear God’s Word and believe it. Our minds change and our hearts swell. This is the way to spiritually make room for newness, and there is no other way to increase our faith.

    Jesus Christ told us in Matthew 6:8 that God knows what we need before we ask for it. He knew our need before we even had a hint that we would desire it. Likewise, God knows our resolutions and the desires of our hearts, and He is calling us to attention. We are not to place all our focus on the resolution. Instead, our focus must be on God alone. He will guide you to the Word you need to hear to build your faith, so that you have great success.

    There’s spiritual work that God has called us to. Reading our Bibles, praying and meditating, and talking often to Heavenly Father are essential to staying spiritually strong so we can be and do what He’s called us to become and get done. Our Lord and Savior tells us in Luke 16:10(MSG), “If you’re honest in small things, you’ll be honest in big things; If you’re a crook in small things, you’ll be a crook in big things. If you’re not honest in small jobs, who will put you in charge of the store?” From the words of Jesus Christ, we can confidently know that making baby steps can be a successful approach to sharpen our spiritual strength and increase our relationship with God.

    Heavenly Father said in Isaiah 43:18-19(NLT), “But forget all that—it is nothing compared to what I am going to do. For I am about to do something new. See, I have already begun! Do you not see it? I will make a pathway through the wilderness. I will create rivers in the dry wasteland.” You are not in this thing alone. God is with you all the way. You don’t have to take big steps to achieve big results. God takes care of the big steps. So, this year, resolve to be as humble before Heavenly Father as you possibly can. Submit to Him, and if you follow wherever the Spirit leads, there’s no pressure and you will not be disappointed. ■

    Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

    “Baby Steps Will Yield Big Results”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2022. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

  • Holding on When You Should Let It Go

    Holding on When You Should Let It Go

    One of my dear friends is 70 years old and admittedly, she’s stubborn, skeptical and cynical; in her mind, all for good reason. She says she loves God, but she’s never considered the reality of getting close to Him. Most of her faith practices are based on what she was taught as a child, and she’s never deviated from the script. Her parents were devoted members of their faith community, but they never talked about Jesus Christ in their home. So, when she grew up to have a family of her own, they never talked about Christ either. Her mother had been a dutiful wife that kept her mouth shut about her own sadness, but she grew to become very bitter about it. My friend carries this same bitterness. It has shown up in every aspect of her life, but she refuses to see it. She was married to her husband for almost thirty years. He passed away almost twenty years ago, and she has refused to consider getting close to God. She believes He allowed her to be left alone.

    Many women feel this kind of resentment, and even if they’ve not verbalized it, some of them believe God has caused them to be alone, without the companionship of a good man in their lives. Psalm 84:11(NLT) tells us, “For the LORD God is our sun and our shield. He gives us grace and glory. The LORD will withhold no good thing from those who do what is right.” As people of faith who honor God, we shouldn’t pick and choose what parts of His Word we think are true and discount the other parts. All of God’s Word is true. It’s our understanding and comprehension of it that’s sometimes faulty, but make no mistake, God commands us to believe the promises He makes to us. He requires that we trust His Word and that we trust who He says He is.

    Any relationship will require two individuals to mutually agree that getting to know each other is a worthwhile endeavor. Both have to be interested in one another, and they must be willing to share information and communicate with each other about their qualities, character, likes and dislikes. Getting to know each other is a beautiful process that is built on mutual respect and honor. We must love and honor God for who He is, because He loves and honors who we are. He doesn’t have to honor us, because He’s God! He’s our Creator, and He could wipeout every living person in less time than a blink of an eye. He could erase even the faintest memory of all life and make it appear as though none of us has ever been on this earth. He doesn’t do this because 1John 4:8 tells us that God is love, and love does not destroy. Love redeems, restores, and builds up.

    God has never violated our free-will choices, and He doesn’t interfere in our lives without our invitation. He’s showing us that we’re His masterpieces, and He honors us. He respects the relationship He wants to have with every person. No less from us is required. We must honor God, and if we’re resenting Him because we think He’s not cooperating with our desires, that’s not honor. That’s wrong believing. It’s doubt, and doubt will take us further away from what we desire, not closer to it.   

    Some of our doubt is passed down from those we cherished and loved. They did not mean to do it, but because they were not taught the truth of God’s Word, they too had doubt in their hearts and minds. There is no way to put a positive spin on doubt and fear. They cripple our faith, and the only remedy is to snuff them out. They must be eradicated so that faith and love can occupy the space that they took up. Some of us won’t get to a place of full surrender, because we’ve been a certain way so long, and we can’t imagine changing. It’s like with my friend, if I even hint that she would experience the joy of the Lord if she changed her attitude, she cuts me off or changes the subject before I can say anything further.

    Proverbs 9:8-9(NLT) tells us, “8 So don’t bother correcting mockers; they will only hate you. But correct the wise, and they will love you. 9 Instruct the wise, and they will be even wiser. Teach the righteous, and they will learn even more.” The Word of God is more valuable than pearls. It’s the greatest treasure we can imagine, but not all will see His truth for the priceless treasure it is. Some will reject it, and it is useless to try to correct them. None of us should ever want to be like those who blatantly reject the light of God’s truth. Instead, we should desire to become wiser and to be sharpened by God’s Word. The Apostle Paul said in 1Corinthians 13:11(NLT), “When I was a child, I spoke and thought and reasoned as a child. But when I grew up, I put away childish things.” It’s time! We must put away immaturity. We’ve been holding on to things we should have let go years ago. This speaks to our refusal to grow beyond the thing that ties us to the past. We must recognize that it’s holding us back and keeping us from what God has for us.

    Grudges, resentment, bitterness, and anger about things that happened years ago, these will keep us from capturing the blessings we desire. If you’ve got an attitude of doubt in our heart and mind, and you’ve thought that God is withholding the blessing of marriage from you, repent. None of us can afford to have this kind of fear laid to our charge. Recognize that doubt and fear come from satan. God blesses and increases His Word. He will not bless a lie, and when we allow doubt and fear to surround our hearts and minds, and we wrap our thoughts and feelings in it, we’re using the tools of darkness to build our tomorrows. There’s no reward in that. God will not punish us for doing this, He will correct us if we allow ourselves to be corrected. Draw close to God. Study His Word and let the love of God in Christ increase in your heart and mind. When you do this, you’ll get rid of doubt, and you’ll only draw the blessings that God wants to give you.■

    Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

    “Holding on When You Should Let It Go”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2022. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

  • Consistent and Unwavering

    Consistent and Unwavering

    I don’t know if any of you have ever had a conversation with someone that is truly disappointed with life, but I have. I know a person that has lost everything in life that was important. This woman became jobless, then homeless and car-less, then her children were taken away. As a single mom, she struggled to hold it together for as long as she could, but her every turn was met with more trouble, and without a firm foundation of faith, she gave up. It never occurred to her that God has a plan for her life. She wrongly believed that He was punishing her for a reason she couldn’t understand. Her mind had become so entrenched in this negative way of believing, that she would not even attempt to trust God. Instead, she was bitter and grew comfortable with a mind and heart of doubt.

    Jesus Christ said of himself in Revelations 3:8 that when he opens a door for us, no one can close it. By the same working of his mighty power, we must also understand that the door he closes, no one can open. The door he has closed for us was the one to darkness, fear, and doubt. We must reconcile in our minds and hearts that if Christ has closed it, and he has, we have no business trying to open it. If we do, we will not like what we find.

    In the preceding verse, Revelations 3:7, our Lord and Master tells us that he is the One that is holy and true. He’s the perfect One, our high priest that makes intercession for us before the Father’s throne. Jesus Christ tells us that he holds the key of David. This key reveals his sovereignty as a King of a Kingdom that has no end. He is the ruler of the universe, and ultimately every knee will bow before him. Hebrews 7:26(NLT) tells us, “He is the kind of high priest we need because he is holy and blameless, unstained by sin. He has been set apart from sinners and has been given the highest place of honor in heaven.”

    Our Lord is holy and set apart. He deserves glory and honor. He accomplished for us what we could not accomplish for ourselves, and he is able to do in us what no other can. He simply asks that we trust him, that we surrender our doubt, fear, and worry, and give all our burdens to him. He tells us in Matthew 11:29(NLT), “Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls.” This is who our loving Savior is. Compassion and caring are his nature. To meet him at this humble place of surrender, our faith is required.

    When our desires and the blessings we expect in life are delayed or destroyed, some people will wall themselves off from having faith in Jesus Christ. This is extremely detrimental. It keeps our faith stagnant; it can plant seeds of arrogance in our hearts, and it conveys that we have a sense of entitlement rather than gratitude. Trouble comes from the devil, but it doesn’t last always. Trouble can be incredibly uncomfortable, but it is also a sign that promotion is near. It is an indicator that we must grow spiritually to achieve the level of maturity that God is calling us to. So, the question isn’t so much about how long trouble will last. The question that we should be asking is how we can get to the door that Jesus Christ has opened for us.

    Human beings are not that complicated, and life can be very simple when we put it in the context of God’s Word. There are only two lanes we can travel in life, one inside the Will of God and the other, outside of it. Jesus Christ said in Mark 3:35(NLT) “Anyone who does God’s will is my brother and sister and mother.” Furthermore, God tell us in Romans 12:2 that we must not be conformed to the culture and traditions of this world, but instead we are to be transformed by changing the way we think, then we will prove God’s Will. Often in life, our problems are on repeat because we haven’t lined up our thinking to the mind of Christ, so we lack the faith to prove God’s perfect Will. Our thinking patterns need to be changed, but we’re too stubborn to do it. We won’t ask God what we need to change, we won’t listen to His answer, and some of us have no intention of actually changing our ways.

    God is in the blessing business. 2Chronicles 16:9 says that His eyes search to and fro throughout the whole earth. He is looking for people who have hearts that are committed to Him, because this is the kind of heart that allows the strength of His power to do the miraculous. We don’t have to be perfect, but we must be consistent in our humility towards God, and we must have a desire to grow in an unwavering faith in Him. It’s not about all the things we want. It’s about trusting in God’s goodness and having confidence that He cannot fail. We know that the devil will throw many darts, but we are more than conquerors through Jesus Christ, and God has well equipped us to handle any trick or plot. It is not nearly as complicated as we make it. When we humble ourselves in faith and thankfulness, we’ll see that the door has already been opened for us by Christ, and all we have to do is walk through it.■

    Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

    “Consistent and Unwavering” , written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2022. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.