Hurting for Love

Philippians 4:7-8(NLT)
“7 Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus. 8 And now, dear brothers and sisters, one final thing. Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise.”

Do you know anyone that says they only think about things that are true, honorable, right, lovely, excellent, and pure? If you do, that person is someone you should absolutely love being around. They’ve got the right attitude and when this level of humility and obedience is their commitment, their inspiration is infectious. They understand that their mind and heart are very valuable instruments when they are used for our Father’s glory. He tells us in Proverbs 4:23(ESV), “Keep your heart with all vigilance, for from it flow the springs of life.” He tells us in Romans 12:2 that we should not be conformed to the customs, cultures, and traditions of this world, but instead we must be transformed by the renewal of our minds. So, we can see very clearly that changing our thoughts and lining them up with the mind of Christ is required to keep our lives blessed and pleasing to God.

When life is going well, we rarely consider that we might need to make some changes to how we think and feel. When things are peachy, an attitude adjustment is the furthest thing from our minds. Often, it’s not until trouble hits, or answers to our prayers are delayed, that we might begin to look in the mirror. Even then, some of us refuse to accept the reality of what is staring back at us. We refuse to accept that our own thoughts and attitudes may be holding us back.

When life becomes a sour reality, it’s often a signal that change is upon us. It’s time to take an internal inventory, and this is not always an easy thing to do. Our behaviors in our previous relationships comes front and center. Perhaps we were overly sensitive, argumentative, or petty in some areas. Thoughts of jealousy and insecurity could have loomed large over many of those relationships, yet, we expect the reward of another one when those issues of the heart and mind were not resolved.

Our Heavenly Father tells us in Colossians 3:2(ESV), “Set your minds on things that are above, not on things that are on earth.” This isn’t a suggestion. It’s a directive. God is not telling us to change our thought-life just so that we can get a man. He’s commanding us to change our behaviors, attitudes, and thoughts to those of Christ because doing so brings us closer to Him. Doing so allows us to mature in spiritual strength and stamina, and we desperately need to do this for our journey further in the Lord.

Too many of us miss the message that God is sending because we’re not paying attention to our internal reality. We’re looking for God to do something on the outside when we haven’t invited Him to do a work on the inside. We haven’t prayed as David did in Psalm 51:10(KJV), “Create in me a clean heart, O God; and renew a right spirit within me.” We should continually pray this prayer. We’re neglecting our relationship with God because we’re not being obedient to what He says. Nothing is more injurious to our well-being than ignoring and neglecting to love God in the way He requires.

We’re hurting ourselves spiritually for the love of a man we don’t even have. This is not walking in faith. Many of us are starving for love and attention from a man, and we’re completely forgetting about establishing and maintaining an intimate relationship with God. Sometimes this is the thing that keeps us stagnant and dissatisfied, and it has to change.

Jesus Christ commanded in Mark 12:30(NLT), “And you must love the LORD your God with all your heart, all your soul, all your mind, and all your strength.” Nothing less than this is acceptable. We must follow the example of Jesus Christ and think Godly thoughts. We must have a good attitude, and make time to pray, read and study God’s Word. Committing to these spiritual practices in Christ means that we’re prioritizing our spiritual growth in a way that pleases God. So, let’s stop hurting ourselves for love, and focus on the One who is love, because this is the key to living a blessed life. ■

Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

English Standard Version (ESV)
The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. ESV® Text Edition: 2016. Copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers.

“Hurting for Love”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2025. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.