It’s Up to the Woman I Marry

What does a born-again man that has never been married and doesn’t have children look for in a woman? You’ll have to ask someone like this. I did, and to my surprise, his answer was quite simple. “I don’t need much, and many of the decisions I make in the future will be up to whomever I marry.” Notably, this man likes to keep most things about his life as simple as possible, and this is actually a blessing, because Jesus Christ kept things simple when he walked upon the earth. Many women would ask, “Where can I find a man like this?” We may not know the answer to this question, but God certainly does.

A man that has given some thought to marriage and would answer a question about it by saying “It’s up to the woman I marry…” is someone that is willing to be flexible. He’s probably going to place the needs of his wife above his own, and he’s confident that whatever those needs are, they can work together to take care of them. Not everyone is generous and thoughtful enough to place another’s needs above their own. So, it’s quite obvious to those of us that know a little bit about God’s Word that in order to meet someone like this, we would have to be match this wonderful quality ourselves. We’d have to possess a peace, humility, love, and strength that is only developed by knowing the scriptures.

2Timothy 3:16-17 (NLT) tells us, “16 All Scripture is inspired by God and is useful to teach us what is true and to make us realize what is wrong in our lives. It corrects us when we are wrong and teaches us to do what is right. 17 God uses it to prepare and equip his people to do every good work.” Many of us have sought a bevy of resources in order to prepare ourselves for marriage. We’ve read books, gone to seminars, and tried all sorts of techniques to help us attract the right man. However, God makes it very clear in 2Timothy 3:16-17 that He uses His Word to prepare and equip us for good work and the ministry of marriage.

Jesus Christ commands us in Mark 12:30(NLT), “And you must love the LORD your God with all your heart, all your soul, all your mind, and all your strength.” When the Word of God is firmly anchored in our hearts and minds, we can’t help but love God this way. This is what He requires from all His children, because loving God with all that we are distinguishes those whose faith is sold out on Him and those who deny His love and power. Choosing to love the Lord God with all our hearts, souls, minds, and strength means that we will always choose to put Him first in our lives because are committed to honor and obey His Word.

Ephesians 5:25-26(NLT) says, “25 For husbands, this means love your wives, just as Christ loved the church. He gave up his life for her 26 to make her holy and clean, washed by the cleansing of God’s word.” When a man says, “It’s up to the woman I marry…” and his intention is to truly partner with his wife to make important decisions and choices that impact and benefit them both, he has a mind and heart that seeks to love her as Christ loves the church. This isn’t because he’s so good, it’s because God is so good, and He has led this man to a place that makes him prepared to partner in a loving and generous way. We must discipline ourselves to obey and honor God’s Word so that we allow our Heavenly Father to do this work in us as well. ■

Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

“It’s Up to the Woman I Marry”,written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2025. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.