Find A Christian Man

Tag: Spiritual Encouragement for Christian Women

  • The Man Is Gone, What Now?

    The Man Is Gone, What Now?

    1 Peter 5:6 (NLT)
    “So humble yourselves under the mighty power of God, and at the right time he will lift you up in honor.”

    Kevin is everything that Desi wanted in a man. Like so many of us, she prayed a long while to meet someone special. When Kevin came into her life, oddly enough, marriage was the last thing on her mind. She’d been supporting her best friend, Lydia, who was midway through chemo, and she was also taking care of Lydia’s 11-year-old daughter, Kristi. Desi had been running so hard the last two months that she barely had time to even wash her hair. She was very happy to be there for them, but the realization that Lydia had no one else to call on during one of the toughest challenges of her life left Desi both sad and afraid. She loved her friend dearly, but she didn’t ever want to be in her shoes. On the rainy Saturday afternoon when she met Kevin, she was so preoccupied with those thoughts that she had almost dismissed him.

    Standing in the living room of Lydia’s tiny apartment one day, noticing how sparse it was and thinking about how long her friend had been sick and struggling, tears began to stream down Desi’s face. She remembered five years ago, when Lydia’s husband left without so much as a word, and never returned. The nice house, the car, the bank accounts, all of it slowly slipped away. As for her neighbors and so-called friends, Lydia felt like all of them except Desi were waiting for her to crumble, thinking to themselves, “the man is gone, what now?” But for Lydia, there were no tears, no pity parties, or mudslinging that anyone could see. It’s as if she said to herself, “I can’t stop. I gotta keep going.” And that’s exactly what she did.

    Desi was determined to do whatever it took to see that Lydia and Kristi would be okay. She was consumed with their care. During those months, she had so little time that she was sure Kevin would become disinterested, but he didn’t. He kept calling and kept pursing, and she was so thankful he did.

    Hebrews 4:16(ESV) tells us, “Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need.” Many single women haven’t taken the time to express a deep gratitude to God for His amazing grace. They haven’t fully appreciated that we have the honor and privilege to go before His throne of grace in our time of need, and He will see us through. Lydia’s circumstances sheds light on the fact that many of us haven’t realized, “There, but for the grace of God, go I.” The story for any of us could be much like her story, but because of God’s grace, we are blessed to have health, a sound mind, and the activity of our limbs.

    God tells us in Romans 12:2(NLT), “Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God’s will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect.” Many of us single women need to renew our minds and change the way we think. Instead of being impatient and full of doubt, we need to proclaim the goodness of God and thank Him for all that He’s done for us. 2Timothy 2:13(ESV) reminds us that “If we are faithless, he remains faithful— for he cannot deny himself.” This truth must be anchored in our hearts and minds continually. Our God is faithful, and He will never leave or forsake us.

    The abandonment of a husband, loneliness, and health challenges, these are difficult situations, but we don’t face these heavies alone. God is helping us every step of the way. He made sure that Lydia was supported by a loving and caring friend, and He made sure that Desi was sweetly rewarded for her selfless and giving heart. It is imperative that as single people our hearts are found faithful and deeply thankful to God for all He’s has done. Know that through every circumstance in your life, God’s love for you never falters. He doesn’t cause our tribulation, but He makes us stronger through it, and if we remain steadfast in our faith in Him, He will deliver, restore, and bless us beyond our greatest imaginations.■

    Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

    “The Man Is Gone, What Now?”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2025. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

  • Specifically for You

    Specifically for You

    woman praising God, He's Awesome and Amazing

    Mark 10:6-9 (NLT)
    “But God made them male and female from the beginning of creation. This explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.  Since they are no longer two but one, let no one split apart what God has joined together.”

    From the very beginning, our God was not alone. He had our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, and the Holy Spirit with Him. They are One, and because of the work that God sent Christ to do for us, we are One with the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. In his prayer to God for the disciples, Jesus Christ prayed in John 17:20-21(NKJV), “20 I do not pray for these alone, but also for those who will believe in Me through their word; 21 that they all may be one, as You, Father, [are] in Me, and I in You; that they also may be one in Us, that the world may believe that You sent Me.” We are a part of God’s family, adopted in by our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. Through marriage, God teaches us the treasure, honor, and responsibility of uniting in oneness with another, so that we treasure, honor, and understand the oneness we share with Him.

    Marriage and family are so important because God established them as a way of achieving His purpose within the earth. He teaches us a little bit about this in Malachi 2:15(NLT). This Word from the Lord came to men who were not treating their wives well. They’d marry them in their youth, and once they grew older, they’d put these older wives aside for younger brides. Heartbroken, the wives would cry out to Heavenly Father. God didn’t like this situation and did not condone it. In this verse, He said to them, “Didn’t the LORD make you one with your wife? In body and spirit you are his. And what does he want? Godly children from your union. So guard your heart; remain loyal to the wife of your youth.”

    In body and spirit, we belong to God. Every inch of us belongs to Him. He tells us in 1Corinthians 6:19 that our bodies are the temple of the Holy Spirit. The Spirit was given to us by God, and he, the Spirit, lives in us. In Galatians 5:25(NLT), Heavenly Father commands, “If we live in the Spirit, let us also walk in the Spirit.” This means that we should let the Holy Spirit guide everything that we do, but many of us don’t do this. We get ahead of God and choose to be in relationships with men that may start out with good intentions but end up breaking our hearts. Our Heavenly Father doesn’t want this. He wants us to stop leaning on our own understanding and allow Him to direct our paths through His precious Holy Spirit.

    God doesn’t steer us into relationships that leave us depleted emotionally, mentally, or physically. He blesses our lives with relationships that help us fulfill His purpose. Many women of God do not approach marriage from this point of view. While the goodness and perfection of God may lead us to think that He has tailored made a man specifically for us, God’s purpose is the driving force behind every union that is ordained by Him. It would not be wise to think that a man’s purpose is to be your spouse or that he was placed on this earth specifically for you. A man’s purpose is to please and honor God. When we make this our purpose as well, movement towards marriage begins to beautifully unfold.

    Hebrews 13:8(NLT) tells us, “Jesus Christ is the same yesterday, today, and forever.” Billions of years have passed, and the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit have not changed, and neither has God’s Word. We are the ones who must change in order to please God and fulfill His purpose. We must be guided in life by what God says. When we pray and ask Him for the opportunity to love and to be loved, we’re essentially telling Him that we’re ready for increase. God knows when we are, and only He know the path of increase that is specifically for you. If you trust Him to show you the way to it, you’ll never be disappointed. ■

    Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

    “Specifically for You”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2025. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

  • Heaven Rejoices

    Heaven Rejoices

    Lovely young woman sitting on the ground, Luke 1:45 esv

    Romans 13:10 (NLT)
    “Love does no wrong to others, so love fulfills the requirement of God’s law.”

    It’s the same no matter who you are or where you are in this world, love will always bring people together. This is no ordinary love we’re talking about. It’s the love of God that was in the heart of Jesus Christ as he walked the earth and completed God’s mission to save us. Believe it or not, people living during the time that Jesus Christ carried out his ministry were more ruthless and wicked than what we see in our modern times. Romans 5:6(NLT) tells us, “When we were utterly helpless, Christ came at just the right time and died for us sinners.” He came to save us all from death, darkness, and destruction. Yet, people denied him. They mocked and lied about him. They constantly plotted and tried to put him in jail and even murder him, but he was not deterred. He triumphantly accomplished everything that God sent him to do, and his success is a testament to the power of God’s love.

    John 3:16(NLT) says, “For God loved the world so much that he gave his one and only Son, so that everyone who believes in him will not perish but have eternal life.” Jesus Christ is the only begotten Son of our precious and powerful Heavenly Father. Even so, we learn from the Gospels that he was not exempt from prayer or studying the scriptures. He prayed constantly, and he studied the scriptures voraciously. As he traveled various places teaching the Gospel, healing the sick, casting out demons, and restoring sight to the blind and hearing to the deaf, he did not fly or teleport from place to place. He walked. He did not manipulate the laws of time and space in order to perform the miraculous. He demonstrated with every action what we, as earth dwellers, can do if we walk by faith.

    Jesus Christ was tremendously powerful, but before his resurrection, he only did the things that you and I can do through the power of the Holy Spirit. He showed us how to walk with power, and he also showed us what human beings can accomplish when we live our lives through him. He has commissioned us, as his brothers and sisters, to make our every action a universal expression of God’s brand of unlimited and unconditional love. This is the key to living a victorious life.

    Jesus Christ said in Luke 15:7(NLT), “I tell you that in the same way there will be more rejoicing in heaven over one sinner who repents than over ninety-nine righteous persons who do not need to repent.” It’s awesome to know that heaven rejoiced when we repented of our sins and gave our lives to the Lord Jesus Christ. This began our spiritual journey in him, and heaven is watching as we live powerfully through him. Our Heavenly Father receives glory when we do what Christ did and serve others and tell people about him. This is what we were called to do, but sometimes we behave as if we’ve forgotten this. We forget the lessons of love that Christ taught us through his life, sacrifice, and resurrection.

    1Peter 4:10-11(NLT) says, “10 God has given each of you a gift from his great variety of spiritual gifts. Use them well to serve one another. 11 Do you have the gift of speaking? Then speak as though God himself were speaking through you. Do you have the gift of helping others? Do it with all the strength and energy that God supplies. Then everything you do will bring glory to God through Jesus Christ. All glory and power to him forever and ever! Amen.” God has empowered every single believer with a gift, and He has also planted opportunities throughout our everyday environment to be a blessing. Our responsibility is to continually pray that He opens our eyes to these. They will bring us closer and closer to the rewards we desire most.

    Ephesians 2:10(NKJV) tells us, “10 For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand that we should walk in them.” That blessing of a husband you’ve been praying for—meeting him at the right place at the right time may be linked to your gift. Your best qualities are always those that make the greatest statement about God’s love. Heaven rejoiced when we turned to God, accepted His love through Jesus Christ, and allowed Him to transform us into who He created us to be. We must remember that saturating our lives in God’s love is how we received victory over sin and death, and sharing His love through good works will also position us to receive the longings of our hearts.■

    Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

    “Heaven Rejoices”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2025. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

  • Is He Husband Material?

    Is He Husband Material?

    When we’re dating someone new, we hear this question all the time, “Is he marriage material?” Although this might not be the most considerate question to ask, if you’ve been praying to God to be a wife, analyzing whether a man is even comfortable with the idea of marriage is not a bad idea. As a woman of God that is potentially making decisions and choices that will change your life forever, you need to always give yourself the courtesy of taking a step back. You need to ask, “What is this we’re doing? Are we dating with a goal or dating to be dating?”

    Sometimes we’re so excited by the prospect of spending time with someone compatible, that we lose sight of what’s important. We forget the missteps we’ve made in the past and the heartbreak they caused. We forget all the times we prayed and promised to wait on God’s green light before we made any assumptions about what we’re working with. And we forget how willing we were in the past to go full on into relationship mode just because he texts, calls, and takes us out for dinner.

    The Bible doesn’t specifically mention dating, but that doesn’t mean that God has nothing to say about it. Psalm 147:5(ESV) says, “Great is our Lord, and abundant in power; his understanding is beyond measure.”  Revelation 22:13(NLT) tells us that He’s “the Alpha and the Omega, the First and the Last, the Beginning and the End.” There isn’t anything that our God doesn’t know. He knows the end at the beginning and the beginning at the end. So, He knew dating would be a thing in our modern times. His expectation is that we will handle it like we do any other activity, which is with Godliness, honesty, respect, and self-control.

    2Timothy 1:7(NLT) declares, “For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline.” God has given us spiritual blessings so that we will be strong and stand in faith. We are to uphold His standard, so we can’t put the wealth of all He’s provided on the backburner just because we’ve met someone new. It’s important for us to have our eyes open with God’s wisdom so that we don’t treat dating someone the same as we would marrying the person that God has ordained to walk with us through life.

    The old school definition of ‘husband material’ is a man that has all the characteristics of being responsible, dependable, honorable, and loyal, and you like him well enough to see yourself marrying him. That’s a pretty good definition, but we ought to taper it with the truth that just because we think he’s marriage material, it doesn’t mean that he is. Sometimes, the man does very little to suggest that he’s ready for something real, and we convince ourselves otherwise simply because we want a man. That can lead us down a disappointing path. We need to let our opinions and assumptions take a back seat, and we need to give ourselves time to hear from God about what we’re working with.

    The bottom line is that we need to establish boundaries around dating, and those boundaries should help us to preserve our stand so that we don’t make the mistake of partnering with the wrong guy. We don’t have to kiss dating good-bye, but we must be careful that it isn’t detrimental to our spiritual walks in Christ. If marrying the man that God has for you is truly your heart’s desire, don’t forfeit it or allow the wrong person to set you back. Stay on the path to marriage by being committed to God’s standard, and don’t be deterred. If your faith is in the right place, the Father will confirm what marriage material is for you, then you can be sure that he’s the one for you, and you’re the one for him as well.■

    Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

    “Is He Marriage Material?”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2025. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

  • God Will Guide You to the Best Path

    God Will Guide You to the Best Path

    fall trees along winding path with old wooden fence Proverbs 3:6 kjv

    Psalm 32:8-11(NLT)
    “8 The LORD says, “I will guide you along the best pathway for your life. I will advise you and watch over you. 9 Do not be like a senseless horse or mule that needs a bit and bridle to keep it under control.” 10 Many sorrows come to the wicked, but unfailing love surrounds those who trust the LORD. 11 So rejoice in the LORD and be glad, all you who obey him! Shout for joy, all you whose hearts are pure!”

    When you’re traveling down an unfamiliar path, and you get lost, what do you do? How do you handle bumps in the road and wrong turns along the way? Do you stay the course, or do you veer off and get on another path? In relationships, the path can get bumpy along the way. We think we’re heading in the right direction, but then something happens, and we realize we’ve taken a wrong turn. A friend faced a situation like this. She had been dating a man for seven months. He has a child and she doesn’t. They had a few hiccups in their relationship when he couldn’t show up because he had daddy duty. She was handling it at first, but when he canceled on escorting her to a huge family celebration because his daughter was sick, she became very upset. She began to think that dating a man with children under 18 was the wrong path for her, but was it?

    In significant relationships, sometimes we don’t realize how much we have to stretch in faith and spiritual maturity to make things work. We underestimate the level of love, compassion, patience, and understanding relationships require. When children are involved, this can be multiplied exponentially. The dynamics change because the care of children will continually be a priority, and the balance between your needs and their needs is sometimes a challenging one to strike. In this situation, the question a single woman of God would need to ask is whether she believes God has called her to be in the lives of this father and child.

    God said in Isaiah 55:9(NLT), “For just as the heavens are higher than the earth, so my ways are higher than your ways and my thoughts higher than your thoughts.” Controlling details and outcomes is something many of us try to do in our relationships. We like to manage our expectations as closely as possible to avoid heartache, but things almost never come out exactly the way we envision. People evolve and change at a pace they set for themselves, and no human being has the right to infringe on that or try to change someone by applying pressure. That just isn’t Godly. Our Heavenly Father is the One in control. He sees everything, and He knows the future. He knows the path you should be on to achieve the very best life you can live.

    In Ephesians 1:16-19(NLT), the Apostle Paul prayed for God, the glorious Father of our Lord Jesus Christ to give His people “spiritual wisdom and insight so that you might grow in your knowledge of God. 18 I pray that your hearts will be flooded with light so that you can understand the confident hope he has given to those he called—his holy people who are his rich and glorious inheritance. 19 I also pray that you will understand the incredible greatness of God’s power for us who believe him.” As God’s children living in these dark and modern times, there’s a lot coming at us, and it’s not good. If we listen to society, we might become selfish and develop a sense of entitlement, but this is not the way of Christ. Like Paul, we must pray that our hearts will be flooded with light and revelation to guide us along the path that God has purposed for our lives.

    The road isn’t always easy. Significant relationships can be incredibly challenging at times, but God is faithful to strengthen us as we seek to do His Will and bless those that He has ordained us to bless. God knows our capability and we should be praying to have a fuller vision of it ourselves. If we think we lack the patience, generosity, and compassion to date a single father, we should seek the Lord before dismissing the relationship altogether. It could be that we’re in a season of greater spiritual growth and maturity, and our Heavenly Father may be calling us to stretch in faith like never before.

    Proverbs 3:5-6(NLT) tells us, “5 Trust in the LORD with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding. 6 Seek his will in all you do, and he will show you which path to take.” Our lives are in the Father’s extremely capable hands. He commands us to trust His leadership and guidance. So, the bottom line is that we need to stop leaning on our own understanding. We need to ask our Heavenly Father to reveal the right person for us, and we need to pray and ask Him to condition our hearts and minds to love this person (and their children) through the love of Christ. Dating a person that has a child doesn’t have to be a deal breaker. It could very well be a blessing that increases your faith, expands your heart, and ultimately causes you to walk closer with God and be the happiest you’ve ever been. ■

    Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

    “God Will Guide You to the Best Path”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2025. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

  • Can You Handle the Blessing?

    Can You Handle the Blessing?

    In many of our past relationships, there was a lot of overpromising and underdelivering by the man and by us as well. When things started to go sour, the ship was sinking so fast that we felt helpless to save it. We learned that significant relationships have the potential to take us to the highest highs and the lowest lows. They can be exciting, rewarding, entertaining, and exhilarating, but all of this takes on new meaning as relationships get closer to marriage. They begin to require more of us, and this doesn’t decrease, but increases as things progress. The bond deepens, and as it does, partners are faced with the work of deeper communication, intimacy, unity, loyalty, commitment, sacrifice, and supportiveness. We learn from experience that sometimes in our significant relationships, partners run rather than pull up their sleeves to prepare for the treasures of the next phase.

    For those of us that are single and praying to partner in marriage, we must open our hearts to the reality that our new relationship will not be like our past ones. This is where our faith should be. We can’t expect newness when in our minds and hearts, we are not making room for it. A single person desiring marriage must measure up to the newness they expect, and this is one of the most challenging truths for us to accept.

    We haven’t asked ourselves if we can truly handle the blessing of a spouse right now, and if we’re still in wait-mode, we have to consider that the answer to this question is maybe not. As an unmarried person that is expecting to be someone’s spouse, we must change. Ephesians 5:22-28(NLT) gives us God’s standard for husbands and wives. This passage tells us, “22 For wives, this means submit to your husbands as to the Lord. 23 For a husband is the head of his wife as Christ is the head of the church. He is the Savior of his body, the church. 24 As the church submits to Christ, so you wives should submit to your husbands in everything. 25 For husbands, this means love your wives, just as Christ loved the church. He gave up his life for her 26 to make her holy and clean, washed by the cleansing of God’s word. 27 He did this to present her to himself as a glorious church without a spot or wrinkle or any other blemish. Instead, she will be holy and without fault. 28 In the same way, husbands ought to love their wives as they love their own bodies. For a man who loves his wife actually shows love for himself.”

    Ephesians 5:22-28 sets God’s expectation for the level of humility and loyalty that men and women must have to partner well. We must become a supportive and good steward of one of God’s treasures. And let’s face it, all of us think we’re ready, but from where we stand today, we don’t have a clue what our next relationship will require of us spiritually, mentally, or emotionally. Many of us are not measuring our preparedness to partner based on the standards that God has set but by the standards we set. Because we’ve done this, our prayers may be missing the mark, because they are not grounded in God’s truth.

    God’s prophet, Daniel, gives us a window into the heart and humility we must have as we pray for spiritual preparation for ourselves and our partners. Daniel 9:4-6(NLT) says, “4 I prayed to the LORD my God and confessed: “O Lord, you are a great and awesome God! You always fulfill your covenant and keep your promises of unfailing love to those who love you and obey your commands. 5 But we have sinned and done wrong. We have rebelled against you and scorned your commands and regulations. 6 We have refused to listen to your servants the prophets, who spoke on your authority to our kings and princes and ancestors and to all the people of the land.”

    Daniel pleaded and prayed to God after reading the writings of the prophet, Jeremiah, that Jerusalem would have a hard time for seventy years because of their sin and unfaithfulness. He labored before God because he loved them, and he knew they had not done the things God requires. As single women, we must have this same heart. We could have been better partners in our prior relationships. We could have walked closer to the Lord. We could have built a solid foundation of faith in Him and changed our ways, but we didn’t do all that we could have. We should be humble before the Lord and seek His forgiveness so that we have the right heart to pray for ourselves, our future spouses, and our marital unions.

    One of the reasons that marriage has gotten a bad rap is because so many are entering into God’s institution blindly, without giving thought to how challenging relationships can be. They require that two people have a solid prayer life and are committed to pray for each other every day. As we stand before our Heavenly Father, we don’t know all the ways in which we need to spiritually grow so that we can handle the blessing of marriage. We don’t know if we’re prepared to nurture and maintain the bond we’ve longed to share with our spouses, but these are the types of things that should be in our prayers. We should be praying for eye-opening revelation that helps us to prepare for our spouses, and we should also be praying that they are doing the same.■

    Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

    “Can You Handle the Blessing?”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2025. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

  • Seeking After an Empty Well

    Seeking After an Empty Well

    “Was I a fool for dating him for so many years?” This is a question we ask ourselves after we’ve been with the significant man in our lives for a long time, and the relationship isn’t yielding anything promising. We’ve either been in this situation or know women that have. They’ve dated a man for years, and given so much of themselves to that relationship, but with all their dedication, commitment, and loyalty, marriage isn’t on the horizon. This is a very hurtful thing to face. We’re hit with some realizations that we’ve avoided for the sake of maintaining the relationship. One of them is that no matter how much we try to convince ourselves we don’t need a piece of paper to prove his love, if we desire something real, that piece of paper is a symbol that can’t be overlooked.

    Amos 3:3(NLT) asks, “Can two people walk together without agreeing on the direction?” A relationship is strengthened by an agreement, and this agreement is a harmony that binds two people together. At the very least, the man should feel the same way about you as you feel about him. As those feelings of affection and devotion deepen, it should lead to something that honors God and is fulfilling and meaningful for both individuals. We should never think that God is pleased when we are not treated in a way that honors us in the way He has ordained in His Word. We’re His daughters, and he wants us to be treated well, and having a husband who loves and values us is a part of that equation.

    Sometimes, when we give our best and it’s not reciprocated, we can be wounded deeply, like the Samaritan woman at the well in John 4. She was plagued with feelings of shame, insecurity, and self-doubt, and this caused her to go from man to man seeking to satisfy a void that only God could fill. As was the custom of many women that lived during that time, she came to draw water from a well in the hottest part of the day. As God would have it, Jesus was there, and he asked her for a drink. John 4:9-10(NLT) tells us, “9 The woman was surprised, for Jews refuse to have anything to do with Samaritans. She said to Jesus, “You are a Jew, and I am a Samaritan woman. Why are you asking me for a drink?” 10 Jesus replied, “If you only knew the gift God has for you and who you are speaking to, you would ask me, and I would give you living water.”

    Of course, Jesus Christ knew all about her pain and her sin, but he was concerned about her salvation and deliverance. He said to her in John 4:16-18(NLT), “16 Go and get your husband,” Jesus told her. 17 “I don’t have a husband,” the woman replied. Jesus said, “You’re right! You don’t have a husband– 18 for you have had five husbands, and you aren’t even married to the man you’re living with now. You certainly spoke the truth!” Our Master Jesus didn’t speak these words to the Samaritan woman to condemn her; he did it to cut through the lies, shame, heartbreak, and disappointment so that he could speak the deliverance of truth into her brokenness.

    In Ephesians 5:25(NLT), God commands, “For husbands, this means love your wives, just as Christ loved the church. He gave up his life for her.” Marriage is extremely important, and we should never believe the lie that it isn’t. That piece of paper, a marriage license, is so important because among many other things, it’s a public declaration of a man’s commitment to honor a woman in the eyes of God. Every woman that loves God deserves to be honored in this way. So, we should never allow anyone to make us feel anything other than privileged and thankful that God has given us this beautiful institution.

    Being consumed and distracted by the desires and lies of the world will only leave us seeking after an empty well. Only the Lord Jesus can give us living water that fills us up to such a degree that we will never be thirsty again. If you’re disappointed and hurt because the significant man in your life doesn’t want marriage, take it all to Jesus Christ. Don’t allow insecurity, doubt, and the fear of loneliness to blind your faith. God loves you and He wants you to be loved and honored because you’re His daughter. Do everything you can to increase your faith in this so that you only want what God wants for you. Then you will be determined to never accept anything less. ■

    Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

    English Standard Version (ESV)
    The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. ESV® Text Edition: 2016. Copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers.

    “Seeking After an Empty Well”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2025. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

  • Hurting for Love

    Hurting for Love

    beautiful woman praying, 1Thessalonians 5:23 niv written on the side of her

    Philippians 4:7-8(NLT)
    “7 Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus. 8 And now, dear brothers and sisters, one final thing. Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise.”

    Do you know anyone that says they only think about things that are true, honorable, right, lovely, excellent, and pure? If you do, that person is someone you should absolutely love being around. They’ve got the right attitude and when this level of humility and obedience is their commitment, their inspiration is infectious. They understand that their mind and heart are very valuable instruments when they are used for our Father’s glory. He tells us in Proverbs 4:23(ESV), “Keep your heart with all vigilance, for from it flow the springs of life.” He tells us in Romans 12:2 that we should not be conformed to the customs, cultures, and traditions of this world, but instead we must be transformed by the renewal of our minds. So, we can see very clearly that changing our thoughts and lining them up with the mind of Christ is required to keep our lives blessed and pleasing to God.

    When life is going well, we rarely consider that we might need to make some changes to how we think and feel. When things are peachy, an attitude adjustment is the furthest thing from our minds. Often, it’s not until trouble hits, or answers to our prayers are delayed, that we might begin to look in the mirror. Even then, some of us refuse to accept the reality of what is staring back at us. We refuse to accept that our own thoughts and attitudes may be holding us back.

    When life becomes a sour reality, it’s often a signal that change is upon us. It’s time to take an internal inventory, and this is not always an easy thing to do. Our behaviors in our previous relationships comes front and center. Perhaps we were overly sensitive, argumentative, or petty in some areas. Thoughts of jealousy and insecurity could have loomed large over many of those relationships, yet, we expect the reward of another one when those issues of the heart and mind were not resolved.

    Our Heavenly Father tells us in Colossians 3:2(ESV), “Set your minds on things that are above, not on things that are on earth.” This isn’t a suggestion. It’s a directive. God is not telling us to change our thought-life just so that we can get a man. He’s commanding us to change our behaviors, attitudes, and thoughts to those of Christ because doing so brings us closer to Him. Doing so allows us to mature in spiritual strength and stamina, and we desperately need to do this for our journey further in the Lord.

    Too many of us miss the message that God is sending because we’re not paying attention to our internal reality. We’re looking for God to do something on the outside when we haven’t invited Him to do a work on the inside. We haven’t prayed as David did in Psalm 51:10(KJV), “Create in me a clean heart, O God; and renew a right spirit within me.” We should continually pray this prayer. We’re neglecting our relationship with God because we’re not being obedient to what He says. Nothing is more injurious to our well-being than ignoring and neglecting to love God in the way He requires.

    We’re hurting ourselves spiritually for the love of a man we don’t even have. This is not walking in faith. Many of us are starving for love and attention from a man, and we’re completely forgetting about establishing and maintaining an intimate relationship with God. Sometimes this is the thing that keeps us stagnant and dissatisfied, and it has to change.

    Jesus Christ commanded in Mark 12:30(NLT), “And you must love the LORD your God with all your heart, all your soul, all your mind, and all your strength.” Nothing less than this is acceptable. We must follow the example of Jesus Christ and think Godly thoughts. We must have a good attitude, and make time to pray, read and study God’s Word. Committing to these spiritual practices in Christ means that we’re prioritizing our spiritual growth in a way that pleases God. So, let’s stop hurting ourselves for love, and focus on the One who is love, because this is the key to living a blessed life. ■

    Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

    English Standard Version (ESV)
    The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. ESV® Text Edition: 2016. Copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers.

    “Hurting for Love”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2025. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

  • What’s Behind the Open Door?

    What’s Behind the Open Door?

    Revelation 3:7-8(NLT)
    “7 This is the message from the one who is holy and true, the one who has the key of David. What he opens, no one can close; and what he closes, no one can open: 8 I know all the things you do, and I have opened a door for you that no one can close.”

    Our Heavenly Father has no equal. When we approach Him in prayer, it is very important that this truth is in our hearts and minds. Revelation 3:7 prepares us to receive a message from Him, the One that is holy, true, majestic, magnificent, loving, all-powerful, all-knowing, and perfect in every way. This is who God is. There is none that compares to Him and He is truly in a class all by Himself. God is righteous and pure, and He has the key of David.

    This passage in Revelation 3:7-8 takes us back to the Old Testament, to the kingship of David, the king chosen by God to govern His people. Our Heavenly Father was always on King David’s mind. This man was not perfect. David made some big mistakes, but he honored the Lord and regarded his every move as ones the Father was watching. God saw King David as a friend, and there is no greater distinction for any human being than that. In King David’s palace, Eliakim was over everything and took care of household matters. He was the keyholder in the palace and had the full authority to act on behalf of the king. If Eliakim locked a door, no one besides the king could take it upon themselves to open it. If he unlocked a door, it was understood that this room could be entered.

    On the throne of the One who is holy and true, Jesus Christ holds the key. He’s the One who opens and shuts doors. He controls everything, and we must understand this. In our time, people will worship just about anyone and anything. They worship false gods, and these false gods hold the keys to doors that lead to darkness, destruction, and death. People worship the earth, sun, moon, and stars. They worship angels and make idols of people and just about everything else, but children of God should never be tricked or fooled by the devil in this way. Jesus Christ is the One who holds the key to liberty, light, and life. He gives it to those who worship the One True Living God through him, because they know that Jesus Christ is the way, the truth, and the life.

    In Deuteronomy 18:9(ESV), our Heavenly Father told His people living in Old Testament times, “When you come into the land that the LORD your God is giving you, you shall not learn to follow the abominable practices of those nations.” God’s mind has not changed about this. Aiming to meet the man that will one day be their spouses, many single women are trying to open the wrong doors. They are participating in practices and methodologies that do not please God or honor His holiness and sovereignty. Those practices will not lead to truth, liberty, light, and life, and they will not produce any fruit in our lives. Of course, we all desire newness and bounty, and we want to go higher in life, but we must understand that there are some doors we should never attempt to open because they lead to darkness and despair. We should only want to open one door, and that door is Jesus Christ.

    The psalmist, King David, prayed to God in Psalm 139:1-8(NLT), “1 O LORD, you have examined my heart and know everything about me. 2 You know when I sit down or stand up. You know my thoughts even when I’m far away. 3 You see me when I travel and when I rest at home. You know everything I do. 4 You know what I am going to say even before I say it, LORD. 5 You go before me and follow me. You place your hand of blessing on my head. 6 Such knowledge is too wonderful for me, too great for me to understand! 7 I can never escape from your Spirit! I can never get away from your presence! 8 If I go up to heaven, you are there; if I go down to the grave, you are there.”

    There can be no doubt in our minds that our Heavenly Father knows us through and through. He knows our character. He examines our secret motives, and He knows what is at the root of our desire to meet a man. He knows everything there is to know about what we need, what we desire, and what is best for us. We must come to our senses and realize that He alone knows the opportunities that are best suited for us. Sometimes we must learn this the hard way, but it is never good to open a door that doesn’t lead to Christ. God will not support our choice to dabble in idolatry, so let’s not do that. Pray to God through Jesus Christ only. Make wise decisions about who you date, and spend your time as a single woman growing and increasing in your faith in God. Then you’ll recognize the door that Christ has opened up for you, and you’ll have the wisdom, spiritual strength, and faith to walk through it.■

    Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

    English Standard Version (ESV)
    The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. ESV® Text Edition: 2016. Copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers.

    “What’s Behind the Open Door?”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2025. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.

  • Do You Truly Believe You’re A Treasure?

    Do You Truly Believe You’re A Treasure?

    Man gazing, Proverbs 18:22 nlt

    Ephesians 5:33(NLT)
    “So again I say, each man must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.”

    A friend said to me not too long ago that one of the qualities she looks for in a man is that he’s chivalrous and always opens her car door. I remarked that her eyes should be on whether his heart is open towards God, forget about your car door. If a man’s heart is closed towards our Heavenly Father, it won’t matter if he’s chivalrous or not, because he’s not going to love you the way God wants him to unless he loves God.

    Jesus Christ told those who refused to receive him and the Gospel in John 5:40-42(NLT), “40 Yet you refuse to come to me to receive this life. 41 Your approval means nothing to me, 42 because I know you don’t have God’s love within you.” Like those who refused the love of Jesus Christ in this passage, there are also many men living today who fit this description. They have no interest in learning about God or worshiping Him. Partnering with men like this can be very dangerous business.

    Our Heavenly Father made men and women different in ways that complement each other beautifully. Some men understand this and honor it. They want to be the kind of man and husband that honors God, but there are some that just look the part. They have no desire to meet God’s standard and love you in the way that He commands. As a single woman of faith, it is so important that you know the difference and can discern between the two, because making a wrong choice can greatly impact your future, and more importantly, it can greatly impact your relationship with Heavenly Father.

    1Corinthians 10:31(NLT) says, “So whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God.” This verse isn’t a suggestion. It’s a directive. It’s instruction about how God wants us to live. As women of faith, we should know that the bottom can fall out of a marriage before it even begins if a man has no interest in the Rock of our Salvation. Children of God must be interested in giving Him glory, and we most assuredly must be focused on giving Him glory through our marriages.

    Proverbs 18:22(NLT) says, “The man who finds a wife finds a treasure, and he receives favor from the LORD.” This verse makes it clear that our Heavenly Father intends that a wife is a man’s treasure. It also affirms that God has made us, His daughters, that treasure. We must ask ourselves if we truly believe we are one. If we do, then we must also believe that God’s plan is that we will be to a man all that He has ordained us to be, and vice versa. Wisdom demands that we understand that our holy, righteous, and perfect Heavenly Father would not present a treasure to a man who doesn’t know Him. It behooves us to be very clear about this.

    As a married couple who honors God through Christ, the intimacy we share with Heavenly Father, and the reverence we have for Him, will bind our marital unions with deep and abiding respect, loyalty, and love. Having this kind of strong marriage is not something we can leave to chance or compromise. So, be committed to do things God’s way. Let your prayers be focused on how you can align your desires for marriage with God’s Will for your life and the life of your future husband. Don’t wait. Do what the Lord requires of you now. Put Him first in your life, because pleasing Him will lead to a successful union that is glued together through the love of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.■

    Scripture quotations marked (NLT) are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved.

    “Do You Truly Believe You’re A Treasure?”, written for findchristianman.wordpress.com. Copyright©2025. All rights reserved. All done to the glory of God through Jesus Christ, our Lord.